help

[all4love 0]

i have a friend who is going through a terrrible time with here husband and she always cries on me on fone everyday , she has been married for like three years but all of a sudden her husband attitude has changed and she said that she will rather go back to her country instead of living in bitterness, she want to go back home and give her self some break and hopefully see what can happen between them, she did not really give me the real details, my question is that she has a 10 year green card granted some time last year , if she goes back to her country , will she be able to use the green card to visit here after she has been divorced from here husband or will she need to apply for a visa again

[all4love 0]

ONE OTHER THING I FORGOT TO SAY WAS THAT WHEN SHE TOLD HER HUSBAND SHE WANTS TO GO HOME, HER HUSBAND SEIZED HER GREEN CARD , SO WHAT CAN SHE DO

[meauxna 15]

my question is that she has a 10 year green card granted some time last year , if she goes back to her country , will she be able to use the green card to visit here after she has been divorced from here husband or will she need to apply for a visa again

She is now a Permanent Resident of the US, independant of her husband, her marriage or divorce. As long as she obeys the rules of being a PR, they can't take it away, and he can't either.

Now, in the case of him taking her physical card away, I'd say that is bad. If she is not safe in her home, she can leave. She shouild keep her passport safe from him, and she can always go to her immigration office and get evidence of her PR status put in her passport. That way she will be able to re-enter the US (if she has kept to the rules of PR). If I were her, trying to get a stamp in the passport, I would definitely tell the officer WHY I don't have my Green Card.

She can find the guidelines for maintaining her PR status at uscis.gov in the Now That You Are a Permanent resident page (in the How do I section).

[JayJay 4]

Totally agree with you meaxuna

I replied in the other thread, come to think of it, and thought maybe she could get a police officer to accompany her to the husband's house (like when you have a bad marriage/relationship and have to get your stuff...) to get the card back from him, since I would assume theft of a Green Card is actually a rather serious matter for the husband/bully?!

[dmartmar 1]

Totally agree with you meauxna.

I replied in the other thread, come to think of it, and thought maybe she could get a police officer to accompany her to the husband's house (like when you have a bad marriage/relationship and have to get your stuff...) to get the card back from him, since I would assume theft of a Green Card is actually a rather serious matter for the husband/bully.

I do agree with the fact that he doesn't have any right, nor entitlement to take away her GC, much less keep it. That much is true.

But one thing is to suggest getting the police involved so she can get her GC back and nothing more, while another thing is to suggest getting the police involved to get the husband purposely in trouble with the law, as a way for revenge. The police would only get involved if the wife called, claiming abuse. I truly doubt that saying something along the lines of "I feel abused b/c my husband took away my GC and now refuses to give it back to me" would actually be considered a form of abuse. But if she was to say or add something like "I'm afraid of my husband b/c he continously abuses me, both physically and verbally" instead, it'd be a whole different story.

As I've stated on my previous posts in this same thread, just calling the USCIS, reporting the card as stolen or lost and requesting a replacement is a much better and more viable solution to this dilemma, as opposed to getting the police involved, mainly out of spite, revenge and selfishness. Why not prevent making matters worse or further escalating them, if a more peaceful and less harmful option benefitting both parties is available?

In no way is her well-being, nor her status affected by not having the GC in hand. Her worry of how not having the GC in hand could affect her well-being or legal status is more of a reason to contact the USCIS and ask for a replacement. But since the GC has already been granted and approved, she shouldn't have anything to worry about anyway.

Had it not been for the love, kind heart and grace the husband had for his wife when he filed for her AOS, taking on the full responsibility an I-864 confers and being the sole provider for both his wife and their household before her EAD was granted, all throughout the AOS process and up to this day, she wouldn't even have a GC to begin with. For this reason only she should be grateful, not hateful, nor vengeful.

If she waited who knows how many months to get her GC and it was the husband who paid for it; why would you even suggest that it would be much easier, faster and cheaper for her to get her GC back if she called the police on her husband? Since it is now HER card, which she got through HIM, she, you, nor any other immigrant should have a problem with being the ones paying for a new card.

Are you telling me that if you were the one in this situation, rather than just go your own separate ways amicably and peacefully, you would instead purposely get your husband in trouble over the GC, even though it was him who helped you get and paid for it in the first place? Was to just get a GC the only reason why you married him in the first place? Sure seems so to me, and this goes for every other person advising the OP's friend to get the police involved as well.

In times of war, I sure wouldn't like to have anyone of yous in my foxhole.

Edited April 9, 2006 by dmartmar

[Jaylen Brit 0]

Its THEFT - period.

If I stole a ring that I bought you does that make it not theft? Of course not. The ring belongs to you now..and I'm breaking ht elaw by depriving you of it.

But this is not a ring - its a govt issued document (it wasn't 'given to her by the husband' its not his decision to issue it - its the Govt's..and how do you know he 'paid for it'?)

Either way he's taken it without permission, and intends to deprive her of it - thats the definition of THEFT.

[hcj 0]

dmartmar, all her husband has to do is give her the GC back. Then there would be no need for calling the police, accusing him of theft, etc.

He is being a bully, and he is trying to control her movement (in/out of the US) by confiscating her GC. She is hardly being "vengeful" by standing up for herself and her rights to her own property and documents. Pretending that the GC has merely been lost is submitting to the bully and invites further abuse. Just like in the playground -- if the school bully takes your lunch money and you just tolerate the situation, the bullying will continue and it will escalate, because you are an easy target. Stand up for yourself, and the bully will pick on someone weaker next time.

[dmartmar 1]

It's THEFT - period.

If I stole a ring that I bought you does that make it not theft? Of course not. The ring belongs to you now..and I'm breaking the law by depriving you of it.

But this is not a ring - it's a gov't issued document. It wasn't 'given to her by the husband and it wasn't his decision to issue it - it was the govt's. Besides; how do you know he was the one that 'paid for it?'

Either way, he's taken it without permission and intends to deprive her of it - that's the definition of THEFT.

Dmartmar, all her husband has to do is give her the GC back. Then, there would be no need for calling the police, accusing him of theft, etc.

He is being a bully, and he is trying to control her movements (in/out of the US) by confiscating her GC. She is hardly being "vengeful" by standing up for herself and her rights to her own property and documents.

Pretending that the GC has merely been lost is submitting to the bully and invites further abuse. Just like in the playground -- if the school bully takes your lunch money and you just tolerate the situation, the bullying will continue and it will escalate, because you are an easy target. Stand up for yourself, and the bully will pick on someone weaker next time.

I vote for marriage counseling first, separating second and divorcing third.

[hcj 0]

I vote for marriage counseling first, separating second and divorcing third.

Agreed. There must have been something that made them say "I do" three years ago, and I hope they can work it out.