Situation escalating with abusive spouse

[oat12 29]

Hello everyone. 
 

I need some help. I am a 10 year greencard holder (IR1).
 

Since leaving my spouse (please refer to previous topic). I was able to file a divorce case with a court in CA. My spouse got served and this must have triggered him as he has reported me to USCIS (I'm not worried about this as he has no evidence since it’s all lies) but my concern here is that he told me he will be filing a response to my divorce by ticking the box “annulment based on fraud”. 
 

I appreciate that this maybe not be the right place to ask but I cannot afford a lawyer and wanted to know how I proceed if I filed for a divorce based on irreconcilable differences and he is responding with annulment based on fraud?

 

He is doing anything and everything he can to spite me and I just want to move on. 
 

 

[Ontarkie 14,227]

~~Moved to Effects of Major Family Changes, from IR1/CR1 P&P - as similar topics are discussed.~~

 

[laylalex 7,285]

I also got divorced in California, but under really different circumstances. I was able to afford a lawyer, but I do know the courts have family law clinics where you can get free or low cost help. You should check with the courthouse where you filed. I don't know what county you're in but here in LA county these services are available.

[Crazy Cat 41,888]

7 hours ago, oat12 said:

Hello everyone. 
 

I need some help. I am a 10 year greencard holder (IR1).
 

Since leaving my spouse (please refer to previous topic). I was able to file a divorce case with a court in CA. My spouse got served and this must have triggered him as he has reported me to USCIS (I'm not worried about this as he has no evidence since it’s all lies) but my concern here is that he told me he will be filing a response to my divorce by ticking the box “annulment based on fraud”. 
 

I appreciate that this maybe not be the right place to ask but I cannot afford a lawyer and wanted to know how I proceed if I filed for a divorce based on irreconcilable differences and he is responding with annulment based on fraud?

 

He is doing anything and everything he can to spite me and I just want to move on. 
 

 

Sounds like he participated in the "fraud", too since he had to provide a lot of evidence to prove the marriage was bona fide.  I would remind him that he is incriminating himself. 

[oat12 29]

5 minutes ago, Crazy Cat said:

Sounds like he participated in the "fraud", too since he had to provide a lot of evidence to prove the marriage was bona fide.  I would remind him that he is incriminating himself. 

I tried but he thinks I’m lying or threatening him. He has no clue how any of this works, not the divorce or the immigration process. He just thinks because he’s bitter that he can control the narrative, my immigration status and now the divorce and I’m losing myself to stress in the process. 

[Crazy Cat 41,888]

2 minutes ago, oat12 said:

I tried but he thinks I’m lying or threatening him. He has no clue how any of this works, not the divorce or the immigration process. He just thinks because he’s bitter that he can control the narrative, my immigration status and now the divorce and I’m losing myself to stress in the process. 

I would take the advice of @laylalex.  You need a legal buffer between you and your spouse.

Edited August 2, 2022 by Crazy Cat

[Palawan 131]

On 8/2/2022 at 12:13 AM, oat12 said:

Hello everyone. 
 

I need some help. I am a 10 year greencard holder (IR1).
 

Since leaving my spouse (please refer to previous topic). I was able to file a divorce case with a court in CA. My spouse got served and this must have triggered him as he has reported me to USCIS (I'm not worried about this as he has no evidence since it’s all lies) but my concern here is that he told me he will be filing a response to my divorce by ticking the box “annulment based on fraud”. 
 

I appreciate that this maybe not be the right place to ask but I cannot afford a lawyer and wanted to know how I proceed if I filed for a divorce based on irreconcilable differences and he is responding with annulment based on fraud?

 

He is doing anything and everything he can to spite me and I just want to move on. 
 

 

Time to lawyer up.....

[Dashinka 24,512]

2 hours ago, oat12 said:

I tried but he thinks I’m lying or threatening him. He has no clue how any of this works, not the divorce or the immigration process. He just thinks because he’s bitter that he can control the narrative, my immigration status and now the divorce and I’m losing myself to stress in the process. 

I agree with @Crazy Cat, @laylalex, and @Palawan, find yourself a lawyer using any of the services available to you in your locale, and keep yourself safe.  Also, try not to stress too much, hopefully a lawyer can answer the question regarding "annulment based on fraud".  Given the little I know about the law, and your specific case, I would think that by him trying to contest the divorce on these grounds, he would have to have some concrete evidence of this occurring to him.  It sounds like he does not think through his actions very well.

 

Good Luck!

 

 

[JeanneAdil 6,511]

i believe a decent lawyer would explain to your ex that saying the marriage was fraud and signing such a paper would qualify him for a huge fine and possible jail time

From the ICE web page is the following:

 

Penalties An individual will be charged with marriage fraud if they entered into a marriage for the purpose of evading U.S. immigration law. This felony offense carries a prison sentence of up to five years and a fine of up to $250,000, and applies to both foreign nationals and U.S. citizens who perpetrate this crime.

 

https://www.ice.gov/sites/default/files/documents/Document/2016/marriageFraudBrochure.pdf

 

if he wants to sign fine,   but please,  even if it would mean a quick divorce,   don't sign this divorce paper yourself

 

even if u can't afford an attorney for the whole process ,  pay for a consultation fee for some guides

[Timona 4,207]

Calling @Family

[oat12 29]

Thank you all for all of your help.

I will be contacting the county's self help services and going forward from there. I will not sign the annulment as it is not true, my ex has 0 proof of fraud (because it was a genuine marriage) so I don't think he will get very far trying to convince a family court judge either.

 

[Family 3,988]

Definitely looks like husband got a crash course on divorce proceedings and may allow his feelings to influence the course of this court battle….but the fraud he will allege is more of the heart, so to speak.

 

And if he’s lawyered up, he certainly bring you to court many many times.

• Either spouse perpetrated a fraud to obtain the other party's consent to marriage. The fraud has to go to the heart, or essence, of the marriage. A good example would be when one spouse persuades the other to marry because of a secret desire to remain in the United States.

[Rocio0010 5,579]

26 minutes ago, oat12 said:

Thank you all for all of your help.

I will be contacting the county's self help services and going forward from there. I will not sign the annulment as it is not true, my ex has 0 proof of fraud (because it was a genuine marriage) so I don't think he will get very far trying to convince a family court judge either.

 

Are you out of the marital home? Are you safe? That’s the first and most important thing now. 
If you have left the marital home, have you collected all the evidence that you need?

[oat12 29]

Just now, Rocio0010 said:

Are you out of the marital home? Are you safe? That’s the first and most important thing now. 
If you have left the marital home, have you collected all the evidence that you need?

I am in the UK now, thank you so much for asking! I am safe and with my parents and siblings. 
 

He has been emailing me everyday with threats and abuse and even death threats towards my cat which I find incredibly disturbing. 
 

The evidence I have of his abuse include: voice recordings, emails, WhatsApp messages, Snapchat messages and Instagram messages he has sent to my siblings abusing them also. 

[oat12 29]

12 minutes ago, Family said:

Definitely looks like husband got a crash course on divorce proceedings and may allow his feelings to influence the course of this court battle….but the fraud he will allege is more of the heart, so to speak.

 

And if he’s lawyered up, he certainly bring you to court many many times.

• Either spouse perpetrated a fraud to obtain the other party's consent to marriage. The fraud has to go to the heart, or essence, of the marriage. A good example would be when one spouse persuades the other to marry because of a secret desire to remain in the United States.

He is a very ignorant and uneducated man when it comes to these matters. I think that he believes that he has complete power and control. In his eyes, if he files for an annulment he thinks it will get automatically approved and then my visa taken away from me. I have tried to explain to him that it doesn’t work this way but he has since sent me a triggering chain of dark and abusive emails. 
 

He also can’t afford a lawyer at all. He will need to start a brand new petition for an annulment and he has 0 evidence to provide. 
 

The funniest part about this all is that he was desperate to marry me 4 years ago and I was the one with doubts. I eventually married him because I loved him and wanted him to be my life partner. It’s funny how rose coloured glasses work. I would never have guessed in a thousand years that I would be where I am today, 4 years later.