I think I've ruined my K-1 opportunity due to a mental health episode

[CJscholes 0]

Hello, 

 

I was staying with my partner in the US on a visa waiver over summer. I was supposed to be here for 79 days. 

 

In the UK, I work as a therapist. I was working as a bereavement center but struggling due to losing my grandma and dealing with a close friend who had terminal cancer. I was unfit to do my job, so took time off to spend the summer with her and recouperate.

 

Just as I was getting better, I had a huge mental health breakdown due to stress of everything. My partner had to call the police andsign involuntary commitment forms and I was taken to hospital.

 

The doctor deemed that I was of no risk and was OK to go home right away. However, this all made me sick and I was in the ER the next day which meant I missed my flight home.

 

That means that I spent more time on my visa waiver than I intended (88 days compared to the original plan of 79).

 

My partner wants me back in September due to her having a high profile event she wants me to be at. I would rather stay away longer to avoid any problems coming back in, but booked the ticket anyway to make her happy. 

 

I'm worried that my mental health relapse and staying 88 days out of 90 will prevent me from coming back into the country.

 

We haven't applied for a K-1 yet, but planned to do so in September. 

 

There was no police report, just a CAD report and involuntary papers. 

 

I am working hard on my mental health. 

 

My partner supports me financially while I am here.

 

Have I ruined my chances of coming back to the country and eventually applying for a K-1?

 

I'm super upset and scared about all this as Ialways wanted to do things legally and legitimately, but because I was unwell I think I've ruined it all.

Edited August 1, 2022 by CJscholes

[powerpuff 6,707]

Coming back so soon after staying almost all of allowed time period (88 out of 90) can certainly raise eyebrows. Compounded by the fact that you do not have a job or other strong ties to the UK. A good rule of thumb is to stay out of the US for twice the amount you were in for, so you were in the US for 3 months, you should ideally not visit for 6 months.

If you’re uncomfortable with coming back so soon, then you should explain that to your partner and do what makes you comfortable. After all, your partner can visit you too.

 

Also, I would strongly suggest avoiding K1 and doing CR1 (spousal visa) instead. It is much more superior (and this is coming from someone who went through K1).

 

Regarding mental health affecting the immigration process, that’s going to be ultimately up to the consular officer who will base it on your medical exam. Bring all the documentation you received (that you’re no risk to yourself and others) to the medical exam. There are many threads here regarding this very topic if you search, a lot of them also went through the UK.

 

[CJscholes 0]

1 minute ago, powerpuff said:

Compounded by the fact that you do not have a job or other strong ties to the UK.

 

I mean, I do *have* a job. I took a leave of absence as I work in mental health and can't do that job if my own mental health is not good. I also have a physical home there and immediate family.

[Ontarkie 14,227]

~~Moved to What Visa DO I Need, from K1 P&P - the OP has not started any process yet and is asking about visiting also.~~

[powerpuff 6,707]

Just now, CJscholes said:

I mean, I do *have* a job. I took a leave of absence as I work in mental health and can't do that job if my own mental health is not good. I also have a physical home there and immediate family.

They might wonder how you can take so much time off and they might ask you that. Be prepared to present an employment letter in case asked. Leave of absence vs active continuous employment are not the same but as with everything, it is all up to the CBP.

[powerpuff 6,707]

5 minutes ago, CJscholes said:

I also have a physical home there and immediate family.

Owning property is a good tie. Immediate family in immigration’s eyes is spouse and children.

[Crazy Cat 41,888]

44 minutes ago, CJscholes said:

Hello, 

 

I was staying with my partner in the US on a visa waiver over summer. I was supposed to be here for 79 days. 

 

In the UK, I work as a therapist. I was working as a bereavement center but struggling due to losing my grandma and dealing with a close friend who had terminal cancer. I was unfit to do my job, so took time off to spend the summer with her and recouperate.

 

Just as I was getting better, I had a huge mental health breakdown due to stress of everything. My partner had to call the police andsign involuntary commitment forms and I was taken to hospital.

 

The doctor deemed that I was of no risk and was OK to go home right away. However, this all made me sick and I was in the ER the next day which meant I missed my flight home.

 

That means that I spent more time on my visa waiver than I intended (88 days compared to the original plan of 79).

 

My partner wants me back in September due to her having a high profile event she wants me to be at. I would rather stay away longer to avoid any problems coming back in, but booked the ticket anyway to make her happy. 

 

I'm worried that my mental health relapse and staying 88 days out of 90 will prevent me from coming back into the country.

 

We haven't applied for a K-1 yet, but planned to do so in September. 

 

There was no police report, just a CAD report and involuntary papers. 

 

I am working hard on my mental health. 

 

My partner supports me financially while I am here.

 

Have I ruined my chances of coming back to the country and eventually applying for a K-1?

 

I'm super upset and scared about all this as Ialways wanted to do things legally and legitimately, but because I was unwell I think I've ruined it all.

It's your life, but I wouldn't recommend returning to the US so soon for the reasons stated by @powerpuff.  As far as the K-1 or CR-1 goes, it is not an issue. @powerpuff is right.  The CR-1 is superior for many couples.  Good luck. 

Edited August 1, 2022 by Crazy Cat

[R&OC 371]

Just supporting the advice you received from everyone here so far. Pursue the CR-1 route. Its much faster in the end of the day and given the mental health struggles you are dealing with, it may give you the ability to move around more freely. The AOS process you would have to go through with a K-1 takes so much longer then what it would take in the past. 

 

Frankly speaking, as a new immigrant, the CR-1 route provides you with more security and you are less vulnerable. My suggestion is that your partner flies out to the UK and you guys get married. Some have used proxy marriages but I am not familiar with that approach at all and then file the CR-1 paperwork.

[JeanneAdil 6,511]

If stress is  the biggest issue now,  don't even think to do the K1

marry when you are both together

if in US at the time,  return and file the CR1

 

what happens to so many who do the K1 and then apply the AOS after marriage,  is stress and more stress

it takes times/ I mean a year sometimes or more

during which getting a DL,  SS # and trying to open bank accounts , is a pain in the neck

it is worrysome

u can not work while waiting for the EAD card (which allows u to work)

stuck at home with stress issues with no family here,   is asking for more stress and often leads to anxiety or panic attacks 

 

get therapy to show u continue to work on your problems and can document this if it is bought up in an visa interview

exercises for muscle relaxation and deep breathing are what i used as a PT for clients with high stress issues (yoga if u can)

[Marieke H 2,512]

Are you currently in the US? I am asking because it looks like you are referring to the US as "here" and the UK as "there". If you are currently in the US, you also have the option of getting married (a simple courthouse wedding would do) and applying for adjustment of status. The big downside is that you would not be able to work or leave the country until you have your EAD/AP, which could take up to 8 months. If you are needing that break anyway to work on your mental health that might be an option for you.

 

It definitely is not ideal, but I just wanted you to know that there is that option.

[SalishSea 17,836]

22 hours ago, CJscholes said:

Hello, 

 

I was staying with my partner in the US on a visa waiver over summer. I was supposed to be here for 79 days. 

 

In the UK, I work as a therapist. I was working as a bereavement center but struggling due to losing my grandma and dealing with a close friend who had terminal cancer. I was unfit to do my job, so took time off to spend the summer with her and recouperate.

 

Just as I was getting better, I had a huge mental health breakdown due to stress of everything. My partner had to call the police andsign involuntary commitment forms and I was taken to hospital.

 

The doctor deemed that I was of no risk and was OK to go home right away. However, this all made me sick and I was in the ER the next day which meant I missed my flight home.

 

That means that I spent more time on my visa waiver than I intended (88 days compared to the original plan of 79).

 

My partner wants me back in September due to her having a high profile event she wants me to be at. I would rather stay away longer to avoid any problems coming back in, but booked the ticket anyway to make her happy. 

 

I'm worried that my mental health relapse and staying 88 days out of 90 will prevent me from coming back into the country.

 

We haven't applied for a K-1 yet, but planned to do so in September. 

 

There was no police report, just a CAD report and involuntary papers. 

 

I am working hard on my mental health. 

 

My partner supports me financially while I am here.

 

Have I ruined my chances of coming back to the country and eventually applying for a K-1?

 

I'm super upset and scared about all this as Ialways wanted to do things legally and legitimately, but because I was unwell I think I've ruined it all.

By coming back so soon, you risk the privilege of ESTA, which might be something you’d want to hang on to during the long K-1 process (expect ~ two years).
 

Do not lie about your intent at the port of entry, if you do come back.   You need to be properly petitioned.

[beloved_dingo 1,979]

So sorry you are struggling with your mental health. I hope you are feeling better and can get continued support going forward. 

 

Regarding the ESTA, I would stay out of the U.S. at least 3 months (5+ would be better) before returning. September is way too soon after staying 88 days. 

 

Just explain to your partner that the risk of being denied entry and losing visa waiver privileges is too high.