My husband is threatening to revoke my permanent residency

[Rocio0010 5,579]

1 minute ago, chi6488 said:

we are all entitle to our opinions

You didn't give an opinion. You gave terrible advice to someone already vulnerable.

If OP was your sister, would you tell her what you just said? "Risk being hurt one more time". You know that that time can be the last one, don't you?

[Joyoussinger 1,425]

30 minutes ago, chi6488 said:

She doesn't have to play the victim she is a victim.  Slamming her arm and having a gun to her head are two different things. 

 

She can either do nothing and he has the upper hand.  Risk being hurt one more time, call the cops and he is booted from home.  She then files divorce, battered spouse and this helps her with divorce and immigration. 

 

She has to decide to either be a victim with no benefits or be a victim and has the upper hand.

 

we are all entitle to our opinions

This is such dangerous advice! You're encouraging her to put herself in harm's way! He does not have the upper hand. Law enforcement takes these cases seriously.  BTW, that violence escalates is not an "opinion". That a victim of domestic violence is in terrible danger is not an "opinion".

[dwheels76 5,468]

2 hours ago, chi6488 said:

Some run some

hide.  
 

i would

play the system and hope and pray he does get physical.  This will help your case with divorce court and seeking immigration as a battered spouse. 
 

we are all adults and can decide for ourselves.  You the OP now need to decide what to do

She doesn't need all that for Immigration. Lord you are asking her to risk life and limb for what a green card. It's not necessary. People self file for Removal of conditions without abuse everyday with no issues.

[JeanneAdil 6,505]

4 hours ago, needhelpnow999 said:

Regardless of everything I care about my husband and I would not do that to him. Thank you for your suggestions, I appreciate the support so much. 

U need to face the facts and understand the following:

1. you may care about him and love him BUT he no longer feels the same about u

2. women/even men have been seriously hurt by people they love

3.  sending u a link to what happened to a Moroccan woman who loved her husband and wanted to work on the marriage and wouldn't stay in shelter like we all told her to

 

https://clarksvillenow.com/local/hamid-houbbadi-sentenced-to-life-in-prison-plus-12-years-for-murder-of-estranged-wife/

 

[Chocobo 196]

5 hours ago, mushroomspore said:

Also, if you have a joint bank account with your husband, go to the bank and open a new account in your name only and DO NOT tell your husband about it. Start applying for jobs and when you get hired, give them your own private account information and NOT the joint bank account.

^^^  So much this!!!  I know firsthand what a vindictive ex van do to a bank account!!  He can drain all the cash and leave you with nothing, and it is not illegal.  If he is a signatory on the account, he has as much right to it as you do.  Please please please, in addition to protecting yourself, protect your finances.  Have a secret account in just your name with as much cash as you can spare.  

 

Do you have any friends near you who can make sure to check in on you to help keep you safe?  

 

If you aren't ready to file a police report, please at least go to the police and find out what your options and resources are. 

[Kali2015 21]

20 hours ago, needhelpnow999 said:

I became a conditional permanent resident in January, my husband and I went to the interview together and it went well. I love my husband but we have been going through a difficult time, tonight something happened and my husband said he wants to divorce and also told me he will “revoke my permanent residency”. I do not want to divorce and I am hoping we will be able to solve the issue, however I am unsure now as I have not been able to talk to him yet. 
 

I love my husband as I mentioned, I have given up everything to be with him and now I’m finally getting my life started here in the US after leaving my home country in the EU. 
 

I entered the marriage in good faith, but in case things did not go well, is it possible he could revoke my permanent residency? It seems his family is suggesting this.
 

I am at loss, I feel devastated. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you. 

Don’t even worry about that . I’m the example I just got my citizenship last month after went through the same situation. Take a deep breath and just chill . Everything happen for a good reason he doesn’t deserve you 

[teddy k 35]

It's really sad that you leave everything for this abuser and get treated like (removed),, but please document everything that he does the next time he hurts you call the police and get his sorry ### arrested that way you have all the proof against him, screw his family too

Edited April 25, 2022 by Ontarkie
by-passing language filter

[Angela & Paul 12]

I think you already got the gist of the story. Please document discreetly any attempt to injure you (take pictures) AND emotionally bully you (write down what he said with time and location). Be aware the emotional bullying can be subtle, it’s rarely “I’ll kill you” but more like preventing you to visit friends, removing phone privileges, giving you orders, limiting your bank accounts/ATM card access,…

I’m wondering if you met his family already because it’s a huge red flag if not. 
You can do searches online about him, about his criminal history because that kind of attitude is usually not a one-time thing.

 At this point the green card thing is the last thing you should worry about because you’re in charge there. Take care of your home situation first… Good luck and please stay safe!

[Mr Genuis 91]

20 hours ago, needhelpnow999 said:

I became a conditional permanent resident in January, my husband and I went to the interview together and it went well. I love my husband but we have been going through a difficult time, tonight something happened and my husband said he wants to divorce and also told me he will “revoke my permanent residency”. I do not want to divorce and I am hoping we will be able to solve the issue, however I am unsure now as I have not been able to talk to him yet. 
 

I love my husband as I mentioned, I have given up everything to be with him and now I’m finally getting my life started here in the US after leaving my home country in the EU. 
 

I entered the marriage in good faith, but in case things did not go well, is it possible he could revoke my permanent residency? It seems his family is suggesting this.
 

I am at loss, I feel devastated. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you. 

Good question. Reason immigrants will chosed to go through hell in marriage because the So called U.S citizen claiming he can threaten them of revoke. I know your worries... you correctly mentioned that you have done wrongs or mistakes and your thought is that if he take it to court for your gc to be revoked he has substantial evidence against you. My advise is.... don't die in a marriage that is not working because of fear of losing your green card. Looking st the comments above they spelled it out clear and I concur that he has no power deciding if your card will be revoked or not. Just keep your evidence for worst case scenario to file police report against him for domestic violence and even if it has to go to court use same evidence and prove that he is abusing you. It's even too late since you have your 10 years green card. He csnt do anything. Don't suffer in marriage because of gc I repeat. I know you are putting love In Defense but the threat is your worry. No to violence or abuse

[LEISEROM 32]

A former friend of my wife had something similar happen to her. She was here visiting a friend on a tourist visa. She met and married some guy working on the friends pool. He refused to file the paperwork for her to get her green card. He beat her up. She left and went to a womens shelter. They helped her file the appropriate paperwork and eventually she got her GC. There are legal provisions to protect her if the citizen wont follow thru

[TBoneTX 45,289]

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The OP has otherwise received excellent advice in this thread.

 

TBoneTX

VJ Moderation

[nene2go 1]

Get out the house, run fast and never look back.

On 4/23/2022 at 9:13 PM, needhelpnow999 said:

We have both made mistakes, however tonight he got my phone and shattered it. I was also trying to talk to him and he went into the bathroom and closed my arm between the door and the wall. I am very heartbroken, I love my husband and I understand I have done mistakes as well, however I am not sure if he could do anything. His family seems to be now against me, it seems they suggested to do this. 

Call the police if he gets your phone or hurt you or threat you. Safety first, leave the house of threat at once..., been there done that -- with abusive American husband and mother in law. If you don't have place to go, find shelter. With your green card you can work, do not depend on your spouse. For those who is doing this, get yourself your own money and debit card. Again, go to safe place first. Do not worry, as green card holder, you have the right...I was in your place so I stayed with abusive husband and father to my child till I become US citizen for same fear you probably experiencing -- that fear to be separated with my child -- it was manipulation. Take care of yourself. 

[mushroomspore 3,044]

1 hour ago, nene2go said:

Get out the house, run fast and never look back.

Call the police if he gets your phone or hurt you or threat you. Safety first, leave the house of threat at once..., been there done that -- with abusive American husband and mother in law. If you don't have place to go, find shelter. With your green card you can work, do not depend on your spouse. For those who is doing this, get yourself your own money and debit card. Again, go to safe place first. Do not worry, as green card holder, you have the right...I was in your place so I stayed with abusive husband and father to my child till I become US citizen for same fear you probably experiencing -- that fear to be separated with my child -- it was manipulation. Take care of yourself. 

So glad you got out. 

[Ontarkie 14,223]

8 hours ago, Joyoussinger said:

The OP is not responsible, in this forum, for convincing us that she is being abused. It's not her responsibility to "make it clear" to us.  She has described her situation and asked for advice. Our responsibility is to advise her based on what she has told us. We are not a judge and jury. We can take her statement at face value and advise her based on that. Many of us have done that. 

Having said that, I believe her. It had to be hard for her to come to this forum and describe her situation. She asked for help and most of us gave it. 

OP,  I sincerely hope you take the good advice given here. Again, please check in and let us know how you're doing.

6 hours ago, ROK2USA said:

None of this is relevant to immigration. We don't need to hear the husband's side of the story. 

 

The OP is worried about her immigration status. Her husband appears to not only have been physically abusive but maybe emotionally abusive and controlling...

She just received her conditional green card but does not have her driver's license yet?  

Did they not apply for Work Authorization and Advance Parole? 

And now he is threatening her green card? One wonders if he lied to her about what she was allowed to do while her GC was pending... 

 

Either way, this relationship does not sound healthy. And the members here have given her good advice about her LPR status and what her husband can and cannot do now she has her conditional green card. 

 

@needhelpnow999 please remember your husband doesn't "own you" and he doesn't get to send you back home because he is no longer happy in the relationship. 

Please takes steps towards becoming independent, preserving your documents and if you have any friends in the US consider reaching out to them. I wish you luck. 

 

 

 

~~Multiple posts removed for TOS Violations. We do not attack members asking for help. It is not your place to judge whether the OP is being abused just like you do not need both sides to give the proper advice. If you cannot answer the OP's questions you have the ability to move on without personal attacks.~~

 

~~Two posts quoted above have been return to view without the removed quotes.~~

 

 

 

[Aaron101 2]

Please stay safe!  I agree and just want to add my voice to all the other replies.  Sorry if this is redundant. 

 

What your husband is doing is domestic violence / abuse, and it's not legal!  Get yourself to safety, please!  Women's shelter, police, friend/relative (though you may not have too many here in the US). 

 

Once you are safe, you may try to go to counseling with your husband.  It's possible for the situation to change, but safety has to be established first. 

 

And don't worry about the green card.  Your husband can't kick you out of the country.  Only the government can do that!