SAWASDEE 2

[ladywhite 0]

Mark and Anya,

Thanks so much for your quick responses! Was wonderful reading about your experiences, but mine is not so wonderful as this just yet. Huge amounts of elation at the receipt of the NOA2 only to be followed my huge amounts of worry because finding out her family is totally against her moving to the US. I really do not know what to do. Unfortunately I don't have the good fortune of being able to stay or travel to Thailand for large amounts of time. I feel sad over the pressure and lack of support that she has and I can't be there to help her.

I have the NOA2 and have not even opened the envelope yet.

Al

It is a tough situation.

I do not know how you two met and how much your Thai fiancee has shared with her parents her relationship with you . I do not know how well her parents know you or how often they hear about you. If they feel like they do not know you well enough to trust you to take care of their daughter, they will likely do (or say) anything to prevent her from moving away from them.

I also do not know your fiancee. If she is anything like me, my parents would not be able to keep me from marrying you and relocating to the US with you. And in Thai culture, children are supposed to do what parents tell them to (or not do what parents tell them not to). It is ungrateful that children do opposite to what parents tell them to (especially when it comes to marriage). This still hold true in some degree nowadays (I hope).

Another thing: you two look young to me. That contributes to her parents feeling even more concerned about her moving away. She is their daughter, after all. Parents usually feel more protected of and concerned about daughters than sons. At least, it is true to Thai culture anyway.

I think Anya's suggestions are good. I would add, though, that, if you can, make an effort to come to Thailand again, maybe to accompany her to an interview. Try to have a week or so here just to get to know your parents-in-law better and to give them a chance to know you better too. Promise them to do whatever you intend to do when their duaghter becomes your wife. What Mark said should be conveyed to them, too, so that they know what will be happening and should be expected when their daughter is here in the States. Do not give them things that are unrealistic or promises you may not be able to keep. You also want to consider giving your fiancee time after receiving the visa so that she can spend that time fully with her parents. Do not rush her to move to the States once the visa is in hand. She has 6 months to spend and kind of wrap up things with her family before moving away. You may also promise her parents to let her come visit Thailand once she receives her GC.

Your finacee should tell her parents she will call often (let say - every week or twice a week). It is very inexpensive now to call Thailand. I use a pre-paid calling card that costs me only 2.5 cents a minute. My friend in Thailand got a pre-paid calling card available at a BTS station that costs her only 2 bahts a minute to call the US. IF her parents know how to call her (and how easy to make that call), they should at least feel relieved that they can contact here any time they feel like it.

Many Thais think that moving and living abroad is nothing but wonderful just like a fairly tale. So, the most important thing, IMHO, is that your fiancee needs to understand what it is like in reality to move to the US, especially if she has not lived abroad before (I'm not talking about traveling here because it is different). I have read a lot (part of that was on this thread) about some Thai fiancees who later moved here felt so homesick, frustrated because of the language barrier, and bored that they wanted to return to Thaialnd to their families. They missed their families and friends. Here, they stayed home all day, did nothing, and had problem communicating with everyone but their own husbands (this thing eats up your self-confidence). Homesickness seems to be worse if, back in thailand, they were so close to their families (some even still slept in the same bed with their moms until they moved to the US to get married).

If your fiancee understands all this and gets prepapred for it, that should help weaken her being homesick and worries from her family. When you are homesick, you cry and vent to your family, that is not good for them to hear how unhappy you are. The family may say things that make your fiancee feel worse or even make her unsure about her decision to marry you and moving here to the States. If that is the case, things would go down hills and that will in turn affect your marriage.

One more thing I should say: you will need to understand how difficult it will be for you when your fiancee is here. You will be the ONLY one she can rely upon. You will feel like you have a child to look after. Yes, that will happen. Be prepared for this, too, if you have not thought about it. If you happen to feel irritated or annoyed, it will show and it could make things bad (or worse). So, you need to be very understanding of how she feels and very patient with her. She may act differently from how you have known her. It will take time just like Mark said, depending how well adjusted you two are and how fast the AOS process and other things (e.f., SSN, DL) take to finish.

Even though I lived in the US for 8 years before returning to Thailand for 2 years, a few months after I got back to the States,, I still needed some adjustment. Many things felt different (from what they were) to me.

My dad told me a few times after he knew I fell in love and moved in with my American BF (I told him everything) that "if he truly loves you, he will make a sacrifice by moving to Thailand with you." In, reality, it was not that easy or even possible. He couldn't move and actually I wouldn't want him to move since, knowing him thoroughly inside out, I knew he wouldn't be happy living in Thailand. When I returned to Thailand, my dad had already been prepared that I would move to the US again in 2 years. He totally supported me because he saw how unhappy I was living in Thailand after spending 8 years in the US and, expecially being away from him. I am the only daughter, so you can imagine how difficult it must have been for him to let me go. After all, every parent wants to see their children happy. That is the bottom line.

Please do not be discouraged or sad. I am sure this obstacle will be overcome. You two will help each other overcome this obstacle. Don't leave it up to her alone and don't take it all in your hand. It will be worth it in the end. Everyone on this thread can gaurantee you that.

I am sure wishing you all the best.

[Tmc225usc 1]

Well everyone, the time is finally here for us.

Im leaving at 2AM in the morning and beginning my journey over to Thailand.

I finally arrive in Bangkok on Sunday night. The next day, I have to meet with Brian and his staff from mythaifiancee to go over everything one final time.

Then Tuesday is the big day.

Im about as nervous as I can get.

Im Worried they will ask her some off the wall question she would never know when we go to the Embassy. Or they will question some form of paperwork.

I know Im just worrying myself with all of this. Hahaha

Ill have a full report of how everything went once it is all over!

To Thai Style USA and anyone else who is right behind me, best of luck to you all!

[Kang Lang 7]

GOOD LUCK TO YOU GUYS!!!!! I hope you have a quick painless interview and approval. try not to worry, i have heard that "mythaifiancee" is a great service.

[ThaiStyleUSA 1]

Well everyone, the time is finally here for us.

Im leaving at 2AM in the morning and beginning my journey over to Thailand.

I finally arrive in Bangkok on Sunday night. The next day, I have to meet with Brian and his staff from mythaifiancee to go over everything one final time.

Then Tuesday is the big day.

Im about as nervous as I can get.

Im Worried they will ask her some off the wall question she would never know when we go to the Embassy. Or they will question some form of paperwork.

I know Im just worrying myself with all of this. Hahaha

Ill have a full report of how everything went once it is all over!

To Thai Style USA and anyone else who is right behind me, best of luck to you all!

Thank you Tmc225usc!! Good luck to both of you as well Keep us posted.

[RUKTHUR 0]

.....

Edited March 4, 2008 by RUKTHUR

[RUKTHUR 0]

Mark and Anya,

Thanks so much for your quick responses! Was wonderful reading about your experiences, but mine is not so wonderful as this just yet. Huge amounts of elation at the receipt of the NOA2 only to be followed my huge amounts of worry because finding out her family is totally against her moving to the US. I really do not know what to do. Unfortunately I don't have the good fortune of being able to stay or travel to Thailand for large amounts of time. I feel sad over the pressure and lack of support that she has and I can't be there to help her.

I have the NOA2 and have not even opened the envelope yet.

Al

Just try to prove to her family that you can support their daughter and take care of her, make her happy when she lives with you there, and wont' make her cry. Remember, dont have any parents want their daughter to have trouble in living.

Chok Dee kha

[marryme 0]

I'm just reading and being nosey .. Mark and Anya seems to be having some family issues.. hope everything works out for them.. anyways, I just came back from my trip to Thailand from 01/28 to - 02/24 .. was just happy to get time off and be with my daling .. but still waiting for the interview date and very anxious for everything to get done and have my daling here with me! Good Luck o everyone!!

[blank0 2]

Wilaiwan received her packet 3 yesterday when she got home from work. Of course she had to call and wake me up to tell me! I'm still unemployed but I want her to send it back ASAP anyway. I'm thinking that we will have at least a month, likely two before she has her interview. I should have it worked out by then. What do you all think ?? Am I figuring correctly for our timeline and interview?

[blank0 2]

By the way she told me that the packet that she got from the embassy is different than the one that I downloaded and sent to her. Not sure what's different yet. She's going to try to scan and send it to me. If i see any important differences I'll make them known.

[marryme 0]

Wilaiwan received her packet 3 yesterday when she got home from work. Of course she had to call and wake me up to tell me! I'm still unemployed but I want her to send it back ASAP anyway. I'm thinking that we will have at least a month, likely two before she has her interview. I should have it worked out by then. What do you all think ?? Am I figuring correctly for our timeline and interview?

Good luck to you bigsky.. I think sending it in right away is a good idea.. she should be able to get everything done before the interview date..

[SqdnGuns 21]

Wilaiwan received her packet 3 yesterday when she got home from work. Of course she had to call and wake me up to tell me! I'm still unemployed but I want her to send it back ASAP anyway. I'm thinking that we will have at least a month, likely two before she has her interview. I should have it worked out by then. What do you all think ?? Am I figuring correctly for our timeline and interview?

Good luck to you bigsky.. I think sending it in right away is a good idea.. she should be able to get everything done before the interview date..

bigsky, your's and my interview should be about the same time.

[blank0 2]

Thanks for the good wishes!! My problem is dealing with the I-134. I need to find a job before the interview. I can't believe I'm saying this but I hope it's not too soon.

Edited March 5, 2008 by bigsky

[huge316 0]

Can anyone tell me what is sent to my fiancee in packet 3... most importantly I am trying to figure out what documents she needs to fill out an mail back and which ones must go with her to the interview... she should be getting her packet 3 really soon as our NOA2 was on Feb 22nd. Also is anything in Thai or is it all in English? I am going out there for the interview with her and I just want to find out what I will need to mail her and what I can just bring along with me when I go there. Also, anyone have any clue as to how long the wait time is for an interview at this point? We're hoping for a late May wedding over here in the states, but I don't know if that's gonna be realistic or not. Any help is greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

Steve

[rin and john 71]

Can anyone tell me what is sent to my fiancee in packet 3... most importantly I am trying to figure out what documents she needs to fill out an mail back and which ones must go with her to the interview... she should be getting her packet 3 really soon as our NOA2 was on Feb 22nd. Also is anything in Thai or is it all in English? I am going out there for the interview with her and I just want to find out what I will need to mail her and what I can just bring along with me when I go there. Also, anyone have any clue as to how long the wait time is for an interview at this point? We're hoping for a late May wedding over here in the states, but I don't know if that's gonna be realistic or not. Any help is greatly appreciated.

Thanks,

Steve

Go to this link for the US Embassy in Bangkok. It has the packet 3 instructions and forms. It tells what has to be sent back before an interview is scheduled. It also includes instructions in Thai.

http://bangkok.usembassy.gov/immigrant_vis...structions.html

Address is:

U.S. Embassy Bangkok, Consular Section

Attention: Immigrant Visa Unit

95 Wireless Road

Bangkok 10330

Thailand

Make sure she includes "Immigrant Visa Unit" as part of the address when she sends the info to the embassy.

Hope it helps and goodluck!

John

Edited March 6, 2008 by rin and john

[beazalbob69 0]

hey guys quick question does anybody know when the embassy website updates the interview dates page the last time was feb 18 and I am desperately waiting for an update cause my girls interview should be on there. Thanks. Soooooooo close now I can taste her....ummm I mean it:)