Same Sex couples ( One from from African country)

[pushbrk 12,883]

5 minutes ago, Dsam said:

Thank you for your advice, we have and do intend to spend time together via trips and more, after all his someone I intend to spend the rest of my life with and his who I’m genuinely in love with . We honestly just don’t know if me going back home to my home country and still being in a relationship is the best option for my safety , hence the reason I’m asking how to overcome such red flags if we decide to go that route of not waiting for years more seal our love. 

As I've told you more than once.  You overcome red flags with time spent together in person.  There is no better way, and not really any way that is nearly as effective.

[RebeccaG 8]

On 2/12/2022 at 5:35 AM, Dsam said:

 

Hi everyone I need advice on my case , I come from an African country in a middle class very religious family who would disown me if they ever found about my sexuality, I’ve tried stylishly bringing it up and their responses were disowning their child and taking them for conversion therapy in the church . I’ve always known I was gay but considering the country I grew up in I always had to keep it locked inside, My Family was very keen about me getting educated, so they sent me abroad to study (outside Africa which is also a country that’s homophobic and anti gay marriage and has no laws to protect gay couples ) and from time to time as long as I kept on making them proud academically they would sponsor my trips and let me travel to other countries for vacations during summer & winter holidays to encourage me for making them proud academically . I was 19 years on a vacation visiting America for holidays when someone approached me 3 years ago (2019), I had an accent so I sounded catchy and we exchanged numbers and social medias .. he was slightly above his mid 20’s (27-28 ) at that time , we chatted after I left America after my vacation, we became good friends and continued communication from time to time and he explained so much to me and made me know I wasn’t less of a human for being gay .I met him twice on two trips to America in 2019. we tried pursuing a relationship back then but due to the distance and time difference it didn’t work out ….so we stayed good friends,in 2020 he got married, his marriage wasn’t working out when the pandemic was kicking in , him and his ex started leaving separately and are now separated about to get divorced finalized … we started trying to work things out  again last year when he started staying on his own due to things not working out in his marriage and he has come to visit me in the country I study last month  this year… we spent more time together and we spoke about things progressing from not just dating but to spending the rest of lives together. At this point of my life , I think I’m gonna have to put my happiness first before my family … My boyfriend is an American citizen who was born in America to American parents and has never sponsored any one for a cr1 visa or immigrant visa in the past,he’s 9 years older than me currently  . My bf plans on visiting me again this year during this summer to spend some more time with me for a month or 2 months.. My question is = if his divorce is finally settled after his next visit to me and we get engaged during this next visit in summer.. would getting married a month after his divorce decree from the court cause problems when his filling for me ?

 

Your opinions and suggestions are welcome , please be nice and truthful, at the same time offer suggestions to help us overcome things that you feel might be a problem .. thank you in advance 

First he got married to a person while having a "distance relationship", i dont know if that would be a red flag because he is already proving he does not take marriages seriously. It is also a red flag if the family is not aware of the relationship it does not matter if you are a gay couple or not.

If you study abroad, i am guessing you dont work and your family pays for everything, you are not in a middleclass family, it is a highclass. Since you have visited the US i am also guessing you have a visa.

My advise is to wait until you finish your degree, and please get financially independent.

The requirements for married couples are extensive, they ask for joint financial bank statement, joint ownership and they have to live together if they dont live together it is kind of difficult to proof a marriage because pictures and gifts are not enough.

So the other option is to get a fiancee visa but you will be in the US and will not be able to work until you get the green card if approved, maybe the interview can be performed in the US since it would not be possible in Russia but i am not sure. So you need to wait at least a year (i dont know if that is enough for divorce people), in the meantime you can get independent from your highclass family. Go to America at least twice. One to get pictures during the vacations (include friends, if you can include cousins and family is better) and keep the receipts of hotels (with both names if possible) and flights. You need to go a second time to get engaged please have the receipt of the ring and take pictures with friends. 

Keep phone and chat log to prove the relationship and watch youtube videos like this one,:

Remember that many visas are rejected every year because of lack of evidence, please do an extensive research

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[pushbrk 12,883]

6 hours ago, RebeccaG said:

First he got married to a person while having a "distance relationship", i dont know if that would be a red flag because he is already proving he does not take marriages seriously. It is also a red flag if the family is not aware of the relationship it does not matter if you are a gay couple or not.

If you study abroad, i am guessing you dont work and your family pays for everything, you are not in a middleclass family, it is a highclass. Since you have visited the US i am also guessing you have a visa.

My advise is to wait until you finish your degree, and please get financially independent.

The requirements for married couples are extensive, they ask for joint financial bank statement, joint ownership and they have to live together if they dont live together it is kind of difficult to proof a marriage because pictures and gifts are not enough.

 

See bold above.  They DO NOT "ask for" any of the things mentioned in bold above.  Those items are on a list that follows the words "In addition to the required..." and it is mentioned the petitioner should include one or more of those types of relationship evidence.  For couples who have never lived together in the same country, most those items will not apply because they are very difficult to even exist in those circumstances.  Actual evidence of time spent together in person, is the best evidence and would fall under the last category on the list. "any other...."

 

 

[Dsam 1]

On 2/19/2022 at 6:47 PM, RebeccaG said:

First he got married to a person while having a "distance relationship", i dont know if that would be a red flag because he is already proving he does not take marriages seriously. It is also a red flag if the family is not aware of the relationship it does not matter if you are a gay couple or not.

If you study abroad, i am guessing you dont work and your family pays for everything, you are not in a middleclass family, it is a highclass. Since you have visited the US i am also guessing you have a visa.

My advise is to wait until you finish your degree, and please get financially independent.

The requirements for married couples are extensive, they ask for joint financial bank statement, joint ownership and they have to live together if they dont live together it is kind of difficult to proof a marriage because pictures and gifts are not enough.

So the other option is to get a fiancee visa but you will be in the US and will not be able to work until you get the green card if approved, maybe the interview can be performed in the US since it would not be possible in Russia but i am not sure. So you need to wait at least a year (i dont know if that is enough for divorce people), in the meantime you can get independent from your highclass family. Go to America at least twice. One to get pictures during the vacations (include friends, if you can include cousins and family is better) and keep the receipts of hotels (with both names if possible) and flights. You need to go a second time to get engaged please have the receipt of the ring and take pictures with friends. 

Keep phone and chat log to prove the relationship and watch youtube videos like this one,:

Remember that many visas are rejected every year because of lack of evidence, please do an extensive research

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you for your reply  , you probably misunderstood my story , my bf didn’t get married while he was in a relationship with me , it didn’t work out the first time we met because it wasn’t the right time so we decided to be just friends and later on he got married to someone else who he is currently been separated from for about a year now although the divorce would be finalized this year. We became closer last year while he was separated (living separately from his ex due to his marriage not working out) and he came to visit me recently  and we plan on having more vacations this year . Also i might be wrong but anyone could chip in on this and clarify my doubts but I don’t think coming from an average class or high class family is a red flag , it should show that you’re not desperate and can fend for yourself if I’m not mistaken?? Also I’ve read a lot of peoples story and I’ve noticed that when it comes to gay couples the consulars understand the cultural implications why a lot of us keep it away from our families  due to fear of death and inhuman practices especially when the beneficiary is from a country where it’s prohibited, my relationship is genuine and me being unable to tell my homophobic and overly religious family shouldn’t be a problem because my relationship is not a secret because we want to keep it a secret, it’s the fact that I could be burnt alive and put through turmoil  … that being said I have a couple of gay friends to write affidavits on my behalf, who support my relationship  if that’s a requirement.Also yes married couples have to live together wherever they please , but in my case:  my bf cannot move to a country where he is likely to be killed and majority of the petitioners don’t move to live with their spouses for years before petitioning for them , I’m yet to see where it’s a requirement for me to live with my boyfriend for a year together before he  petitions for me,rather time spent together on holidays , vacations and constant communication is the key as @pushbrk said . Please correct me if I’m wrong , I’m here to learn cuz I don’t know it all . I’d like to know your input, Thank you in advance.

[Redro 4,611]

@Dsam you come from a high fraud country so there is a possibility your case will be scrutinized more. 

This poster had her K1 approved even though there was an overlapping relationship and several red flags. 

Members are just warning you of the worst case scenario. There is a chance this process won't be quick or easy. There is also a chance of visa denial. 

You should prepare for all eventualities 

If you are both from middle class families and have the financial resources consider moving to a country that is more LGBT friendly after you finish your studies.

Your partner does not have to move to Russia. 

Best thing to do is have lots of time in person together.