Odd Filipina mannerisms

[NoMansLand2020 298]

What is up with the almost child like behavior when a Filipina doesn't get her way or is upset about something trivial? 

 

If I'm talking to my fiancée and she doesn't like something I've said or doesn't understand she will get quiet and not respond and either turn off her camera so I can't see her, ubruptly end the call or walk away phone leaving me to wonder where she's gone. 

 

I've been dealing with it for almost three years now and its getting old. Especially because she's never apologetic about it and then blames me for her acting that way. 

[Chancy 6,242]

5 minutes ago, NoMansLand2020 said:

I've been dealing with it for almost three years now and its getting old. Especially because she's never apologetic about it and then blames me for her acting that way. 

 

Google "tampo".  If you've been dealing with that behavior for years, expect that it will continue.  Miracles can happen, but be prepared for the likelihood that your fiancee will not change.  I hope you seriously consider if you are willing to put up with childish tantrums and blame game throughout your married life.  I wish you the wisdom to get through this.

 

Btw, I'm a Filipina.  Just because we have a Filipino word for it doesn't mean having tantrums is a uniquely Filipino behavior.

 

[notantifun 196]

Immaturity is not an exclusive trait of a gender and race and so is not taking responsibility for their actions.

 

You seem to identify some glaring red flags in this individual you call your fiance. And you're asking why an entire race and gender act this way. May I ask how you came to this conclusion?

Edited January 15, 2022 by notantifun

[Verrou 1,962]

it's the person and not the nationality.

[RO_AH 1,659]

33 minutes ago, NoMansLand2020 said:

What is up with the almost child like behavior when a Filipina doesn't get her way or is upset about something trivial? 

 

If I'm talking to my fiancée and she doesn't like something I've said or doesn't understand she will get quiet and not respond and either turn off her camera so I can't see her, ubruptly end the call or walk away phone leaving me to wonder where she's gone. 

 

I've been dealing with it for almost three years now and its getting old. Especially because she's never apologetic about it and then blames me for her acting that way. 

At Least @Chancy pointed you in the right direction. Your problem is that you have been dealing with it. I will PM you.

[RO_AH 1,659]

26 minutes ago, Misscloud said:

it's the person and not the nationality.

Yes and no. Not all Pinay women get tampo but it is very common to their culture. If it wasn't why would they have a word for it in their language? How much experience do you have with the Filipino culture?

Edited January 15, 2022 by RO_AH

[Verrou 1,962]

24 minutes ago, RO_AH said:

Yes and no. Not all Pinay women get tampo but it is very common to their culture. If it wasn't why would they have a word for it in their language? How much experience do you have with the Filipino culture?

Lol I’m from indonesia and they have the name for that in indonesia too. Depend on the person in my opinion. I’ve lived all around and there’s always people like that especially women. They “think” it’s cute. For a while yes, after a while it’s getting old. 3 years ? I’m surprised u survive 

[Allaboutwaiting 2,503]

Agreed with @Chancy 

Even if it is considered a cultural thing -which is debatable- you do not have to embrace it, especially if it seriously affects the dynamics of your relationship.

[Hank_ 9,174]

2 hours ago, NoMansLand2020 said:

What is up with the almost child like behavior when a Filipina doesn't get her way or is upset about something trivial? 

 

If I'm talking to my fiancée and she doesn't like something I've said or doesn't understand she will get quiet and not respond and either turn off her camera so I can't see her, ubruptly end the call or walk away phone leaving me to wonder where she's gone. 

 

I've been dealing with it for almost three years now and its getting old. Especially because she's never apologetic about it and then blames me for her acting that way. 

Chancy pointed you in the right direction.  Tampo is a learned habit, and not uncommon.  If you don't let her know you are not going to play that game, then expect her to keep doing it.

 

 

[iwannaplay54 985]

😂 There was a great thread on this awhile back 😂

[notantifun 196]

A bunch of people here have mentioned "tampo". I am Filipina and tampo is sulking, plain and simple. Don't let Google fool you  that it's some sort of unique behavior observed in Filipinos. Anyone who shows this behavior obviously lacks maturity.

[Boiler 45,731]

2 hours ago, iwannaplay54 said:

😂 There was a great thread on this awhile back 😂

There have been enough threads for its own forum.

[notantifun 196]

3 hours ago, Allaboutwaiting said:

Agreed with @Chancy 

Even if it is considered a cultural thing -which is debatable- you do not have to embrace it, especially if it seriously affects the dynamics of your relationship.

In cultures where enmeshment is normalized, you can expect people to label awful behaviors as a cultural thing. I think it's because a lot of people just refuse to be adults and I'm saying this as a Filipina.

 

[Allaboutwaiting 2,503]

5 minutes ago, notantifun said:

In cultures where enmeshment is normalized, you can expect people to label awful behaviors as a cultural thing. I think it's because a lot of people just refuse to be adults and I'm saying this as a Filipina.

There must be some serious academic research about this somewhere.

[Boiler 45,731]

Always struck me as a different version of crazy.