Looking to know what are my options [Going for Divorce, TN]

[WaterLeaf 200]

Hi all. Long story short, things went downhill pretty quick and my Husband isn't doing enough to support (leach) nor try to act like a real Husband PM me if you want to help me talk about it. So less detail of the drama in case he see this (he'll end up making his own account anyway).

So I'm looking into getting divorce when I can. We're still in the same apartment, but using a different primary address. It's been like this since day 1 when he came here.

While I'm already getting myself a manufactured home set up (all in my name, not his) and to be away from him, I know there seem to be some limitation at the moment that I can't just freely divorce my Husband in Tennessee. He don't want to move back home due to vaccination requirements. & I'm pretty sure even if I get the divorce papers ready for a easy sign to agree and divorce, he won't sign it.

So here where it get more difficult for me: I'm on the hook to support him because I filled the affidavit of support for him. So while I'm planning to be separated hopefully at least a year or will have to do more in order to get a divorce, I feel like I have to keep him on my health insurance and auto insurance(?? Because I'll assume he won't pay for his own and then cause a big debt liability that I'll end up having to pay more than what's covered if I had him covered??). I'm thinking about sending a mail to the Department of Human Service in my county to be sure he doesn't try to file for food stamp and other things because that's where I'll end up having to pay for if he gets it and such like that. If I can withdraw that affidavit of support and no longer be responsible for him I'd like to know how/when I can do that.

I've been contacting lawyers but I got no response. No phone call answered. No phone calls returned. I left voicemails. I called/emailed within 50 miles radius of me. I had not walked in to talk to someone yet but I'm planning to when I get time. Mostly I work a lot, sometimes double jobs. My Husband only works part time and he will not go for a full time job. I think he is planning to aim for unemployment but I don't know if that is also a public assistance that I'll end up having to pay back, which I think I do.

So I'm trying my best to do what's better for me and protect me because things had been getting pretty close to domestic violence. I'm all about learning all I need to know (give me links I'll appreciate it, threads, whatever it takes) and to be sure that I don't get screwed over by lawyer as well if something was missed. If I'm going to be separated from my Husband for 1 year, I think something else may come up and things get more complicated. I don't know what it'll be. Another marriage, or seeking public funds, idk. I just can't leave now because I don't have a place to stay at the moment. My home is going to be anytime between April or later.

Notice to mods: If I'm posting in the wrong section of the forum, I'd appreciate it if you could relocate it for me.

 

 

[MASH 172]

1 hour ago, WaterLeaf said:

Hi all. Long story short, things went downhill pretty quick and my Husband isn't doing enough to support (leach) nor try to act like a real Husband PM me if you want to help me talk about it. So less detail of the drama in case he see this (he'll end up making his own account anyway).

So I'm looking into getting divorce when I can. We're still in the same apartment, but using a different primary address. It's been like this since day 1 when he came here.

While I'm already getting myself a manufactured home set up (all in my name, not his) and to be away from him, I know there seem to be some limitation at the moment that I can't just freely divorce my Husband in Tennessee. He don't want to move back home due to vaccination requirements. & I'm pretty sure even if I get the divorce papers ready for a easy sign to agree and divorce, he won't sign it.

So here where it get more difficult for me: I'm on the hook to support him because I filled the affidavit of support for him. So while I'm planning to be separated hopefully at least a year or will have to do more in order to get a divorce, I feel like I have to keep him on my health insurance and auto insurance(?? Because I'll assume he won't pay for his own and then cause a big debt liability that I'll end up having to pay more than what's covered if I had him covered??). I'm thinking about sending a mail to the Department of Human Service in my county to be sure he doesn't try to file for food stamp and other things because that's where I'll end up having to pay for if he gets it and such like that. If I can withdraw that affidavit of support and no longer be responsible for him I'd like to know how/when I can do that.

I've been contacting lawyers but I got no response. No phone call answered. No phone calls returned. I left voicemails. I called/emailed within 50 miles radius of me. I had not walked in to talk to someone yet but I'm planning to when I get time. Mostly I work a lot, sometimes double jobs. My Husband only works part time and he will not go for a full time job. I think he is planning to aim for unemployment but I don't know if that is also a public assistance that I'll end up having to pay back, which I think I do.

So I'm trying my best to do what's better for me and protect me because things had been getting pretty close to domestic violence. I'm all about learning all I need to know (give me links I'll appreciate it, threads, whatever it takes) and to be sure that I don't get screwed over by lawyer as well if something was missed. If I'm going to be separated from my Husband for 1 year, I think something else may come up and things get more complicated. I don't know what it'll be. Another marriage, or seeking public funds, idk. I just can't leave now because I don't have a place to stay at the moment. My home is going to be anytime between April or later.

Notice to mods: If I'm posting in the wrong section of the forum, I'd appreciate it if you could relocate it for me.

 

 

I’m sorry to hear that you are going through this. 
but sadly from my understanding that you cannot get out of the affidavit of support especially it looks like he got approved on the 2 year GC which means you are on the hook till that 2 year GC expired. Just be happy you did not get the 10 year old.

 

once his 2 year is up he either has to go home cause he won’t be allowed for unemployment or work as he won’t be legal anymore, or say u abused him to get his citizenship which he will need a lot of evidence to do.

 

I would say get a lawyer for the divorce and cut all ties with him.

[powerpuff 6,697]

11 minutes ago, MASH said:

the 2 year GC which means you are on the hook till that 2 year GC expired. Just be happy you did not get the 10 year old.

Not true. You’re on the hook until one of these criteria is met:

- the immigrant becomes a citizen 

- the immigrant has worked 40 quarters (about 10 years)

- the immigrant leaves the US and abandons LPR status 

- the immigrant dies 

 

11 minutes ago, MASH said:

once his 2 year is up he either has to go home cause he won’t be allowed for unemployment or work as he won’t be legal anymore, or say u abused him to get his citizenship which he will need a lot of evidence to do.

Also not true…. He can simply file for removal of conditions with a divorce waiver in order to get the 10 year GC. Thousands of people have done that. 

Edited January 10, 2022 by powerpuff

[MASH 172]

2 minutes ago, powerpuff said:

Not true. You’re on the hook until one of this criteria is met:

- the immigrant becomes a citizen 

- the immigrant has worked 40 quarters (about 10 years)

- the immigrant leaves the US and abandons LPR status 

- the immigrant dies 

 

Also not true…. He can simply file for removal of conditions with a divorce waiver in order to get the 10 year GC. Thousands of people have done that. 

I wrote to quickly that I was gonna go back to update that she can also do it on a divorce waiver and prove it was a bonifide marriage 

 

as for the other things I guess either it changed or I was misinformed when asked this from a friend of mine.

 

thank you for updating me and the OP

 

[Boiler 45,467]

Nothing has changed

[WaterLeaf 200]

I've been reading up for the I-864. Yes, I'm on the hook until then. The question would remain if he decide to not renew his 2 yr greencard and didn't go back to his country, I'm still on the hook?

[Boiler 45,467]

3 minutes ago, WaterLeaf said:

I've been reading up for the I-864. Yes, I'm on the hook until then. The question would remain if he decide to not renew his 2 yr greencard and didn't go back to his country, I'm still on the hook?

Yes

[powerpuff 6,697]

2 hours ago, WaterLeaf said:

So while I'm planning to be separated hopefully at least a year or will have to do more in order to get a divorce, I feel like I have to keep him on my health insurance and auto insurance(?? Because I'll assume he won't pay for his own and then cause a big debt liability that I'll end up having to pay more than what's covered if I had him covered??).

From what I have read, you cannot remove your spouse from insurances until the divorce is finalized. This is why getting a good divorce attorney to protect you financially (issues like spousal support etc) should be your priority right now. 
 

41 minutes ago, MASH said:

I'm thinking about sending a mail to the Department of Human Service in my county to be sure he doesn't try to file for food stamp and other things because that's where I'll end up having to pay for if he gets it and such like that.

Unfortunately you cannot stop him from applying and receiving such services especially if he’s eligible to do so. 
 

3 minutes ago, WaterLeaf said:

The question would remain if he decide to not renew his 2 yr greencard and didn't go back to his country, I'm still on the hook?

Yes. 

[Rocio0010 5,579]

2 hours ago, WaterLeaf said:

can't just freely divorce my Husband in Tennessee. He

Why not?

2 hours ago, WaterLeaf said:

unemployment but I don't know if that is also a public assistance that I'll end up having to pay back, which I think I do.

No. Unemployment is not public assistance. He pays into unemployment with his work. It won’t affect you.

 

43 minutes ago, MASH said:

he won't sign it.

He doesn’t need to!

 

2 hours ago, WaterLeaf said:

feel like I have to keep him on my health insurance and auto insurance(?? Because I'll assume he won't pay for his own and then cause a big debt liability that I'll end up having to pay more than what's covered if I had him covered??

Divorce and you’re out of that hook at least.

[WaterLeaf 200]

4 minutes ago, Rocio0010 said:

Why not?

No. Unemployment is not public assistance. He pays into unemployment with his work. It won’t affect you.

 

He doesn’t need to!

 

Divorce and you’re out of that hook at least.

There are laws in TN that accept a divorce but my reasons do not fall under the grounding category for a divorce in TN. I heard some people got away with it easily but I don't know how recent was that and thinking the judge may not allow it for me.

To all, thanks for all the reply. I appreciate the infos. I may return for more question on this thread and still read up.

[Ontarkie 14,218]

 

When you file for legal separation (if your state requires) you can ask your lawyer then if you must keep him on your health insurance. 

The AOS is not about you supporting him financially, just repayment if he did get benefits. Most PR do not qualify until something like 5 yrs. Some states have different rules. So look into your state services. As for if he goes home and gives up his GC yes you are off the hook. 

 

Edited January 10, 2022 by Ontarkie

[WaterLeaf 200]

1 minute ago, Ontarkie said:

 

Is he going to be driving your car? If not get him off the insurance. When you file for legal separation (if your state requires) you can ask your lawyer then if you must keep him on your health insurance. 

The AOS is not about you supporting him financially, just repayment if he did get benefits. Most PR do not qualify until something like 5 yrs. Some states have different rules. So look into your state services. As for if he goes home and gives up his GC yes you are off the hook. 

 

Well, there is a car that is in mine and his name. We got it for him to drive around and I've been maintaining it because he do not know how to do so or know how to spot scam mechanics. I can likely go get my name off the car and leave it just to him and insure it only himself since I've been paying basically most things including auto/health/rent insurance.

I'll look into legal separation and the health insurance information. Thank you. I don't think he'll be leaving anytime soon. But I've heard things like he don't want to naturalize but he could change his mind at any given moment.

[Ontarkie 14,218]

1 minute ago, WaterLeaf said:

Well, there is a car that is in mine and his name. We got it for him to drive around and I've been maintaining it because he do not know how to do so or know how to spot scam mechanics. I can likely go get my name off the car and leave it just to him and insure it only himself since I've been paying basically most things including auto/health/rent insurance.

I'll look into legal separation and the health insurance information. Thank you. I don't think he'll be leaving anytime soon. But I've heard things like he don't want to naturalize but he could change his mind at any given moment.

Yes look into it. I don't know what qualifications are for you to get divorced sooner. I saw you mentioned it above. You might not think you fit into one of the categories but another good reason to seek a good lawyer. 

 

I didn't want to naturalize at first either. Only did it for my kids. He may change his mind. 

[WaterLeaf 200]

Yeah. I could get a divorce if we can go for a no-ground both signing agree for divorce but he can say no and I have to find a ground-fault to get a divorce. A lawyer area here is needed then.
https://www.tncourts.gov/help-center/court-approved-divorce-forms

I'll be looking for more lawyers, maybe re-dial some numbers and see if I get any answers.

[SalishSea 17,818]

4 hours ago, MASH said:

I’m sorry to hear that you are going through this. 
but sadly from my understanding that you cannot get out of the affidavit of support especially it looks like he got approved on the 2 year GC which means you are on the hook till that 2 year GC expired. Just be happy you did not get the 10 year old.

 

once his 2 year is up he either has to go home cause he won’t be allowed for unemployment or work as he won’t be legal anymore, or say u abused him to get his citizenship which he will need a lot of evidence to do.

 

I would say get a lawyer for the divorce and cut all ties with him.

This is all incorrect.