Apology

[Fuzzness 2]

am i to understand from you both that when i offer my *hugs*... or a yay , and use the smilies to infuse a feeling from my personality or character... that it comes across as meaningless?

sadly, i never thought that... i thought that i was truly being honest and saying what i said... and using the smilies to emphasize my excitement for someone's situation... or just well wishes... hmm, maybe i should re-think the situation...

uh oh..

[CarolineM 0]

not at all.

did you see my previous post where I said there's pattern where we hear what's wrong and then offer support 100 times. That, to me, is when I find it meaningless. Read over the immigrants nightmere threads and see how many times people have given a smiley, a hug a flower...To me, honestly, it's nice, but I don't need the constant reassurance and validation that others need here....

but if you feel you want to re-think your smileys to me - so be it. I'm sorry you feel that way.

(HAHAH sounds like I'm begging for hugs and smileys...oooh lord.)

[thndrdancr 0]

I really think I understand it perfectly. The reason Craig has such a difficult time leaving, is..that in his mind...since he HAD been going thru so many issues and HAD contempleted leaving permenently, I think thats exactly what was going thru his mind, is that..."EGADS, this is how I am gonna feel if I DO leave for good"...kinda thing...ya get??????

Anyhows, I would be thinkin that if I were him, and from someone who spends their life analyzing folks, thats would I personally would come up with.

Happy for ya guys! Have a great time and just enjoy yourselves.

[Sister Fracas 5]

am i to understand from you both that when i offer my *hugs*... or a yay , and use the smilies to infuse a feeling from my personality or character... that it comes across as meaningless?

sadly, i never thought that... i thought that i was truly being honest and saying what i said... and using the smilies to emphasize my excitement for someone's situation... or just well wishes... hmm, maybe i should re-think the situation...

No, that is not what I'm saying and I like to use the smilies as much as anyone else. It's not the actual use of the smilies I'm really meaning, it's more the "just offer a happy response" that I'm talking about. I don't believe you do that Dixie because your posts are thoughtful and warm, but I do think some people provide responses that they think the original poster might want to read, to make them feel good. I'm not sure this is always helpful. I've struggled trying to explain this, so I hope it makes sense.

[jodyangel 0]

In regards to the posts I have read about Craig returning unexpectedly, my only question was always :

Why is Michelle on the computer, and not with Craig who she was just missing so much a few hours ago?

aHA!!!

[almaty 19]

not at all.

did you see my previous post where I said there's pattern where we hear what's wrong and then offer support 100 times. That, to me, is when I find it meaningless. Read over the immigrants nightmere threads and see how many times people have given a smiley, a hug a flower...To me, honestly, it's nice, but I don't need the constant reassurance and validation that others need here....

but if you feel you want to re-think your smileys to me - so be it. I'm sorry you feel that way.

(HAHAH sounds like I'm begging for hugs and smileys...oooh lord.)

sister karo..here some smileys for you B)

[Welshcookie 17]

In regards to the posts I have read about Craig returning unexpectedly, my only question was always :

Why is Michelle on the computer, and not with Craig who she was just missing so much a few hours ago?

aHA!!!

I would rather see the marriage counselling posts than these....

[rebeccajo 14]

LOL....i see another wise old owl on this thread.....

[almaty 19]

my only point to this situation...i think my sisters monique and ceCrise made the point..there is an issue here and not one that will go away with time..a seperation issue...needs to be looked into by a professional in order, to reduce the anxiety felt by both parties in the marriage

[mercuryroad 0]

my only point to this situation...i think my sisters monique and ceCrise made the point..there is an issue here and not one that will go away with time..a seperation issue...needs to be looked into by a professional in order, to reduce the anxiety felt by both parties in the marriage

You've been watching Dr Phil again, haven't you!

[CarolineM 0]

sister karo..here some smileys for you

Ahhh I feel validated. THANK YOU DEAN

Brother Dean IS Dr. Phil

[faith 0]

not at all.

did you see my previous post where I said there's pattern where we hear what's wrong and then offer support 100 times. That, to me, is when I find it meaningless. Read over the immigrants nightmere threads and see how many times people have given a smiley, a hug a flower...To me, honestly, it's nice, but I don't need the constant reassurance and validation that others need here....

but if you feel you want to re-think your smileys to me - so be it. I'm sorry you feel that way.

(HAHAH sounds like I'm begging for hugs and smileys...oooh lord.)

I don't see what's wrong with that pattern. If someone posts something here it's because they WANT a reaction. If a smiley/hug/flower/etc gives them the support they are looking for, then so be it.

It's not as bad as you are making it sound. It's not about contant reassurance and validation. It's about a feeling that some of these people on here are your friends, and after all, when you have a problem, don't you turn to your friends for advice/support or just to plain be someone to vent at?

[Dixie_Peach 1]

not at all.

did you see my previous post where I said there's pattern where we hear what's wrong and then offer support 100 times. That, to me, is when I find it meaningless. Read over the immigrants nightmere threads and see how many times people have given a smiley, a hug a flower...To me, honestly, it's nice, but I don't need the constant reassurance and validation that others need here....

but if you feel you want to re-think your smileys to me - so be it. I'm sorry you feel that way.

(HAHAH sounds like I'm begging for hugs and smileys...oooh lord.)

karo... i didn't mean that as a personal attack... by no means...

i was seriously asking... does it come off as being meaningless...

in real life... i am a touchy-feely kinda person... and i gesture with my hands a lot... (my brothers say it is the italian from my dad's side)... and i want that warmth to come through to people here...

ya still get smilies kiddo!!! *hugs too*... and lots of em!

am i to understand from you both that when i offer my *hugs*... or a yay , and use the smilies to infuse a feeling from my personality or character... that it comes across as meaningless?

sadly, i never thought that... i thought that i was truly being honest and saying what i said... and using the smilies to emphasize my excitement for someone's situation... or just well wishes... hmm, maybe i should re-think the situation...

No, that is not what I'm saying and I like to use the smilies as much as anyone else. It's not the actual use of the smilies I'm really meaning, it's more the "just offer a happy response" that I'm talking about. I don't believe you do that Dixie because your posts are thoughtful and warm, but I do think some people provide responses that they think the original poster might want to read, to make them feel good. I'm not sure this is always helpful. I've struggled trying to explain this, so I hope it makes sense.

understood... and thank you for clarifying! it does make sense!

my only point to this situation...i think my sisters monique and ceCrise made the point..there is an issue here and not one that will go away with time..a seperation issue...needs to be looked into by a professional in order, to reduce the anxiety felt by both parties in the marriage

brother dean... i try to always offer support here... and if i have anything good to say - or just unsure of what to say, i don't say anything...

with that said... like you, i wish michelle and craig the best... ALL OF US HERE AT VJ, i wish us the best... we are here for the same reason... to bring our loved ones to us...

and i think it would be a good idea for anyone going through this process to have some type of couples counseling

my only point to this situation...i think my sisters monique and ceCrise made the point..there is an issue here and not one that will go away with time..a seperation issue...needs to be looked into by a professional in order, to reduce the anxiety felt by both parties in the marriage

You've been watching Dr Phil again, haven't you!

[Hilarious Clinton 452]

not at all.

did you see my previous post where I said there's pattern where we hear what's wrong and then offer support 100 times. That, to me, is when I find it meaningless. Read over the immigrants nightmere threads and see how many times people have given a smiley, a hug a flower...To me, honestly, it's nice, but I don't need the constant reassurance and validation that others need here....

but if you feel you want to re-think your smileys to me - so be it. I'm sorry you feel that way.

(HAHAH sounds like I'm begging for hugs and smileys...oooh lord.)

I save my hugz for real people.

[pax 0]

I think we're getting a bit off-topic here; smileys and the use thereof are a fairly universal concern, if you can call it that, on message boards and it has very little to do with the topic at hand.

If the discussion is to continue, it should focus on repairing some relationships and assessing the value of honesty and forthrightness in conversations at VJ.