Sponsored Spouse Move to the US alone and IR1 related questions

[Paul and Sopheap 91]

14 hours ago, Jorgedig said:

Tangential, but on the subject of Irish accents......   some of them sound almost American to me!  Nearly as close as Canadian.   Here in the PNW, our accents are pretty generically American.

 

 

Agreed! I worked with a couple of Irish guys at my old job. One of them had such an American-sounding accent that I talked to him for a few minutes and assumed he was either American/Canadian. 

[Zoeeeeeee 797]

12 hours ago, LifeAbroad said:

And the reason he wants to move to US so bad is he wants to work in NYC, Silicon Valley and all that. I've explained to him, US is not all that it seems like the movies that you see when it comes to employment, working opportunities. But of course Grass is always greener on the other side. 

Oh man. So your husband would be going from working in IT in a country that has some of the best employment laws in the world...to the US, where working in Silicon Valley or similar means he'll probably be working 18 hours a day...

 

And I'm not joking. Germany's rules around work-life balance are fantastic. I'm from England, ours are pretty good too. My husband is a video game designer, which falls into the tech category...and he generally works 12 hours a day. During crunch (which lasts up to 6 months every couple of years) and milestones (1-4 weeks every 6 months or so), he works 18-20 hours a day. Including weekends. And he doesn't get paid overtime, as he's salaried.

 

I have friends who work for Google and Cisco up in Silicon Valley and it's exactly the same for them. So, whilst your husband has probably seen videos of the glamorous, fun offices that these companies have and the great nightlife/activities living in those areas would offer...does he realise that the reason the offices are great is because you basically end up living there - that's why they make them so nice. And the nightlife/activities/environment etc of the area...he's pretty much never going to experience, because he's going to be stuck in the office. 

 

Honestly, the culture shock from working in Germany in that industry to working in the US in that industry, would potentially also impact a person's mental health. 

[LifeAbroad 8]

19 hours ago, CanadaDude said:

To me the fact that he's more interested in going to the US than being with you and caring for the kids, and thinking that you are his ticket there is setting off alarm bells in my head. I don't really want to pass judgement beyond that because he could be just that you two jive well with a loose relationship, and that's fine if that works for you and I know of many who prefer that. Though I'll echo others and say that the kids needs and upbringing should be central here and be kept front and center.

 

However, what you could do is file the I-130 petition and let it get approved and just keep it alive by logging into the NVC CEAC once a year. He can't use an approved petition to go out to the US on his own as you'd still need to file the Affidavit of Support and prove US domicile, but what it does do is significantly reduce the waiting time for when you are both ready to return to the US if that's what you want to do down the line. The I-130 step is arguably the most lengthy part of the process...although that wasn't in my case, it is the case for the majority of them from Europe.  CBP might give him some additional scrutiny when attempting to visit because of the approved I-130 but so long as he demonstrates his ties to Germany he shouldn't have too much trouble gaining admission, especially if you're still in Germany at the time.

 

If he's dead set on moving out to the US then he should seek out employment in Germany that'll allow him to transfer over on an L-1 after a year's employment (think multinational corp), or try and gain a H-1B visa if eligible. When you're ready to move back it should be a simple matter of finalizing the IR-1 visa so he can obtain permanent status.

 

I definitely agree that what you should absolutely *not* to is try to prove US domicile when you have no intent to move back to the US, at best they'll give him a 221(g) and want you to move back, at worse they may consider it material misrepresentation. And even had he got to the US, the USCIS may have issues that there was zero marital union after he arrived if/when he applied for naturalization.

Yea, that's what im planning to do to just submit the I-130 and then see how it goes, at least get my foot in the door first. He thinks it's too much hassle to apply for work visa and all that, even now he simply told me ' you can go ahead and start my application now =)). I was in rage but also had to laugh at his naive at the same time. I'm pulling my hair here thinking how I can come up with 120k to prove financial support and my husband asks me to proceed like signing up for an email account 😑

[LifeAbroad 8]

19 hours ago, laylalex said:

I don't judge you for making the choices you feel are right for your family and its dynamic. My husband's aunt lives apart from her life partner half the year -- she is in the UK, and he is in Canada part of the time -- and it works for them and their son. 

 

Unconventional lives can be hard to square with US immigration though, and you have to take that into account. My husband and I have joint checking and credit card accounts only for the purposes of immigration -- we have structured our finances to be separate as much as possible, but we understand this looks "weird" to USCIS so a couple of joint accounts it is. They are strictly for paying housing costs including furnishings, but we use them often enough that they are as genuine as they look. It's a hassle for us, but we want to sail on through. This is a minor hassle though and easily overcome.

 

You have a bigger problem: you have to be domiciled in the US and intend to make this your permanent home in order to sponsor his application. Your choices to live apart may work for you, but if they don't work for USCIS, it's you who has to bend, not them. If you are a square peg, you need to get ready to whittle yourself into a round one because that round hole isn't going to be receptive to something square.

 

I know what it's like to feel like you don't want to let your husband down when he has a big dream. You want to find a solution somehow that will make everything just right for him. But I think you may need to have a "come to Jesus" talk with him about the reality of him moving without you. 

 

You should also not downplay the importance of what you want here. You want to stay in Germany and start a business and raise your children in a community and school system you feel comfortable with. Why should you be the one to upend your life in a way that doesn't suit you? You also mentioned that you're sick of moving -- how do you know he won't get to America with you and your kids, and decide, nope, not here either, where are we going next? Where are you in all of this? Are you an enthusiastic partner in globetrotting or are you kind of just along for the ride even if it isn't what is best for you?

 

I mean it when I say I'm not judging your choices for living separately, but you really do need to think if moving back is right for you and your kids. Words like he's "pressuring" you and he "insists on moving" to the US might look like red flags to others. Good luck, and best wishes to you and your family in sorting this out.

I have considered this decision for about a year now and it's not an easy one. We also keep our financially separately and I like it that way, but coming up with the petition, maybe this is something we should look into. However we've been married for 5 years with 2 kids so at this point, i don't think proving a bona fide marriage would be a problem anymore. 

 

And yes, feeling like if I don't do this, he prob would resent me forever is something i struggle with every single day. Even though what I WANT and know is BEST for my and kids is staying here in Germany.

 

Thank you for your thought guidance and help, really appreciate it

[LifeAbroad 8]

19 hours ago, SteveInBostonI130 said:

1.  No.  IR1/CR1 is a family reunification visa, as others have said.  You need to establish domicile in the US before or at the same time your husband travels to the US. 

 

2. Joint sponsor can reside anywhere.

 

3. You will need to establish domicile by getting whatever housing arrangement made and plans to actually live in the US.  This evidence is needed when submitting documents to NVC after the I-130 is approved.

 

4. You will be the primary supporter of your husband, even if you don't qualify with your own income.  You will be required to sign that you will support your husband for 40 quarters, he becomes a citizen, he abandons his permanent residency status, or he dies.  He can combine his income with yours on the I-864, as long as he can prove his income will continue when arriving in the US.

 

5. The minimum is 5 times.  And it is 5 time the difference between current income and the 125% poverty guide.  But it is at the discretion of the CO at the embassy.  He/she may require more, or different type of assets.  Or may ignore that altogether and require full current income.  It is his/her judgement call on how likely the immigrant will become a public charge, and they tend to be very conservative in this.  

 

6.  When his visa is approved by the US embassy, he has 6 months from the date of the medical exam he took prior to the interview.  This will be the expiration date in his visa.

 

7. Spouse visas was one of the only handful of visas processed last year by most embassies, unless the embassy was fully closed.  For some it has been 2 yr+, for others only about a year.  We were fortunate to get our visa completed in under a year, but ours were one the exceptions.  No expedite, just pure luck on getting our I-130 approved faster than normal and her embassy processing spouse visas all summer and fall.  I would say from 1 to 2 years, assuming your case is straight-forward (no complication, no criminal pasts).  

 

 

Please tell your husband to look for employment based visas if he wants to go to the US without you.  Or, for a longshot, he can apply for the diversity visa "lottery".

 

EDIT:  Removed mention of ROC.  Does not apply to the OP.

4. He mentioned to me that it will be ok for him to continue working for his current German employer for a few months after arriving in the US, would this still considered continued income even if it will be paid to his German bank account? He's confident he can find a job after a few months.

 

I don't think lottery is available for countries like Germany, or I might be wrong.

[LifeAbroad 8]

19 hours ago, Jorgedig said:

Oh, I get that.  The US can't hold a candle to most EU countries when it comes to early parent/child support and benefits.

But I have also been a single mom, and I can't imagine doing it solo with a new baby, even in a country with the best of services for young parents.  Nothing can replace your child's other  parent, as long as they want to parent that child.

 

I also totally get the idea of living separately.  I was single for years, and I'm an only child and an introvert.   Sometimes, I just look at my husband and think 'WTH,.'  We definitely get along better now that he's working full-time.  Lockdown was hard, LOL.  We haven't been apart since he got here three years ago, and if he went back to NZ alone, I'd be lost and lonely (after ~ 24 hours of mad introversion).

 

I would gently recommend looking very hard at what you both want, and what his motivation could possibly for wanting to move to the US solo.  Not only does that seem strange for a husband and father, from an immigration perspective, it does not make sense at all.

 

Take care, and please stick around here.  

 

\

 

I was not a single mom but a SOLO mom from when my daughter was 4months - 3.5 years old. Also was working remotely from home while taking care of her. I was a lot less tired than living with my husband now lol. It's like taking care of 2 toddlers. But of course I think the present of her dad is still very important. Having 2 kids might be different though, I would have to wait and see. Thank you !!!!

[LifeAbroad 8]

59 minutes ago, Zoeeeeeee said:

Oh man. So your husband would be going from working in IT in a country that has some of the best employment laws in the world...to the US, where working in Silicon Valley or similar means he'll probably be working 18 hours a day...

 

And I'm not joking. Germany's rules around work-life balance are fantastic. I'm from England, ours are pretty good too. My husband is a video game designer, which falls into the tech category...and he generally works 12 hours a day. During crunch (which lasts up to 6 months every couple of years) and milestones (1-4 weeks every 6 months or so), he works 18-20 hours a day. Including weekends. And he doesn't get paid overtime, as he's salaried.

 

I have friends who work for Google and Cisco up in Silicon Valley and it's exactly the same for them. So, whilst your husband has probably seen videos of the glamorous, fun offices that these companies have and the great nightlife/activities living in those areas would offer...does he realise that the reason the offices are great is because you basically end up living there - that's why they make them so nice. And the nightlife/activities/environment etc of the area...he's pretty much never going to experience, because he's going to be stuck in the office. 

 

Honestly, the culture shock from working in Germany in that industry to working in the US in that industry, would potentially also impact a person's mental health. 

Yup, you have said it. I sent him your message as well so at least he know i'm not making things up. My husband's salary here is considered the top 10% for his age in his field, working 9-5 or 6, 30 days (6 weeks) vacation, on call bonus every 5,6 weeks, Parent leave i think for a month or 3 month when the new baby arrives. And THEY CAN'T FIRE YOU WITH THE EMPLOYMENT AT WILL BS ONCE YOU HAVE PASSED THE PROBATION PERIOD AND SIGN THE CONTRACT.  Government is giving us 204 euro/child/month so double with 2 kids. Even when I've never worked in Germany, i still also get paid minimally to stay home and take care of my newborn up to a year. we pay 23 euro for my kid's kindergarden, yes tax is high but in turn, we have our healthcare covered. if i have a headache, stomache, finger ache, I go to Doctor, just to see if something wrong and not to worry about the crazy bill. Of course it's not perfect but i honestly lived in fear of getting sick while i was still in America. You are from the UK so I'm sure you can relate regarding healthcare. 

 

Don't get me wrong, I miss the convenience, 24-h supermarket, drive through banks, super customer service, shopping malls open on Sunday, Popeyes, In and Out, etc....in America, but to raise young children, i think Europe is a much better environment. 

 

I am not dead set on settling in Germany forever either. I just wanted my daughter to learn her language, experience the culture and we can live in a slower pace after so many years in America. 

Edited April 15, 2021 by LifeAbroad

[pushbrk 12,822]

2 minutes ago, LifeAbroad said:

Yup, you have said it. I sent him your message as well so at least he know i'm not making things up. My husband's salary here is considered the top 10% for his age in his field, working 9-5 or 6, 30 days (6 weeks) vacation, on call bonus every 5,6 weeks, Parent leave i think for a month or 3 month when the new baby arrive. And THEY CAN'T FIRE YOU WITH THE EMPLOYMENT AT WILL BS ONCE YOU HAVE PASSED THE PROBATION PERIOD AND SIGN THE CONTRACT.  Government is giving us 204/child/month so double with 2 kids. Since i'm not working, i will also get paid minimally to stay home and take care of my newborn up to a year. we pay 23 euro for my kid's kindergarden, yes tax is high but in turn, we have our healthcare covered. if i have a headache, stomache, finger ache, I go to Doctor, just to see if something wrong and not to worry about the crazy bill. Of course it's not perfect but i honestly lived in fear of getting sick while i was still in America. You are from the UK so I'm sure you can relate regarding healthcare. 

 

Don't get me wrong, I miss the convenience, 24-h supermarket, drive through banks, super customer service, shopping malls open on Sunday, Popeyes, In and Out, etc....in America, but to raise young children, i think Europe is a much better environment. 

 

I am not dead set on settling in Germany forever either. I just wanted my daughter to learn her language, experience the culture and we can live in a slower pace after so many years in America. 

Sounds like the discussion has moved from an immigration subject to discussing your family issues.  When your husband understands what HE needs to understand about what YOU want and what CAN BE DONE in terms of US Immigration, you will have a chance of getting on the same page, or not.

[LifeAbroad 8]

1 minute ago, pushbrk said:

Sounds like the discussion has moved from an immigration subject to discussing your family issues.  When your husband understands what HE needs to understand about what YOU want and what CAN BE DONE in terms of US Immigration, you will have a chance of getting on the same page, or not.

Sorry for the rant. and yes, you are absolutely right. 

[Nitas_man 3,100]

4 hours ago, LifeAbroad said:

4. He mentioned to me that it will be ok for him to continue working for his current German employer for a few months after arriving in the US, would this still considered continued income even if it will be paid to his German bank account? He's confident he can find a job after a few months.

 

I don't think lottery is available for countries like Germany, or I might be wrong.

Re-iterating:  What you are wanting to do isn’t feasible.

 

Your husband has not briefed himself on the immigration process.  You (USC) will be expected to demonstrate that you have taken concrete steps to either precede him

or accompany him to permanently reside in the US.

 

“Continuing income” was explained.  No version of employment is going to be accepted other than concrete proof of employment in the US by an employer in the US.  Even a job offer doesn’t count.  A job transfer to the US with terms all spelled out will count.  

[Thekingandqueen 1]

You need to re-establish yourself in US. I have a friend who had a similar situation but her husband was in a k1. Once he got to US and got his green card she moved to his home country for nearly 2 years while he stayed in US alone. So it is possible. 

[LindaSBaldeh 9]

This type of visa is to unite families. You would have to be here in the US to file for him. So, you living there trying to get him here I don't see it happening.

[pushbrk 12,822]

7 hours ago, LindaSBaldeh said:

This type of visa is to unite families. You would have to be here in the US to file for him. So, you living there trying to get him here I don't see it happening.

No, she does NOT need to be in the US to file for him.  This is a long thread.  Did you read the earlier responses before jumping in with false information?

[Nitas_man 3,100]

8 hours ago, LindaSBaldeh said:

This type of visa is to unite families. You would have to be here in the US to file for him. So, you living there trying to get him here I don't see it happening.

Lol not quite

 

She can file for him and he can accompany her to the US as a family.

She cannot however file to send him to the US and remain overseas herself

[aaron2020 11,651]

On 4/19/2021 at 12:06 AM, Thekingandqueen said:

You need to re-establish yourself in US. I have a friend who had a similar situation but her husband was in a k1. Once he got to US and got his green card she moved to his home country for nearly 2 years while he stayed in US alone. So it is possible. 

Would have loved to be the fly on the way at the ROC interview.  The USC wife was living overseas and the K-1/LPR husband was living in the US apart for nearly 2 years.