Is my online Moroccan boyfriend lying to me? (merged)

[KULtoATL 1,551]

22 minutes ago, Annonymus said:

Dominican Republic ?

DR sounds like a nice vacation spot But please bring at least one friend.

 

2 minutes ago, Annonymus said:

His family is going to help for now.

Great that they want to help but looking at the bigger picture, your friend or boyfriend really needs to nail a job down there and make his own living however small or big. Because when the time comes to petition him, at least he won't seem like he's an unemployed person just mooching off you and being with you simply for a green card. Despite not finishing high school, truly, there should be some lower level jobs that he could start with. And like @Lucky Cat said, Morocco is a tough consulate. 

 

Meet more, spend more time together in person, start saving/gathering evidence from every meeting just in case you guys really end up going for a fiance or spousal visa. You guys will need it.

[.yana 598]

Sounds like green card shopping to me. At the very least. At worst - he has other malicious intents, so like others have already said - do not meet with him alone, especially in another country. 

 

If he is able to join you & your friends on a vacation - wonderful. Let him. See how he acts around you, get to know him a little bit. Then once you feel comfortable - you can perhaps spend some time 1:1. 

 

But to be honest with you, since this is already how your relationship starts (with major red flags, feelings of unsafety, trust issues) - why even bother at this point? Plenty of other guys offline or online, whatever your preference is. Seems like the attachment is minimal from your side so just wrap things up now while it's light & easy. 

[Rocio0010 5,599]

Always ask yourself: if a friend of yours was in the exact same situation, what would be your advice? I would definitely tell you not to go down there on your own; if he doesn’t understand it, then that is a major red flag. It would mean that he’s not really concerned about your safety. Would you want to be married to somebody that doesn’t regard your safety as important?

Also, marriage can be the most wonderful, interesting, loving and challenging relationship that you establish, but even couples that have been together for many years before marriage have to sort out all kinds of differences and conflicts. Add to that the cultural differences and it might be a recipe for a very painful and expensive heartache. Spend some years together before, establish your boundaries and see if he will respect them. 

[JeanneAdil 6,606]

1st of all he won't be able to get a visa to visit outside Morocco as very hard in all the embassies there for a man to get one to go anywhere as no education,  no job,  and no property to show he plans to return home

And , as for going to Morocco,  you can be comfortable with the trip/ the country makes the person you visit in charge for your safety / just register in the local police department so they know you are there

I went alone but i think going with a friend is good idea as a friend might see some warning signs you would be blind to 

to be aware a fiance visa does not allow a person to work for almost a year in the US and this is hard on both parties

  the K1 visa is also the expensive way to go

but go slow   Moroccans are eager to come to the US in any way possible 

Watch for signs showing he is talking to many many women from US,  France, Germany, Canada and UK

I am married 11 years to one and bluntly put out of all his Moroccan friends that came here on fiance or spouse visa ,  we are the only ones still married 

 

We do have many on VJ still married to a Moroccan and happy and i hope they chime in with good stories to give you hope

but i look at the fact that this person has no education and that alone is scary as it makes his job prospect in the US slim

 

But if you are interested,  just met him in person and GO SLOW

 

Read the Department of State warnings about relationship with Moroccan

https://ma.usembassy.gov/u-s-citizen-services/local-resources-of-u-s-citizens/marriage-information/

which include professing love fast

asking you to visit and meet fast

Edited April 6, 2021 by JeanneAdil

[Adventine 3,201]

Also, doesn't anyone find it curious that the guy's family is willing to help him pay for a vacation, when the guy is unemployed? Presumably, if he didn't even complete a high school education, the family must not be financially stable, either. So OP needs to ask herself, why is the family so willing to fund a (completely optional) vacation for their son to meet a total stranger?

[JeanneAdil 6,606]

3 minutes ago, Adventine said:

Also, doesn't anyone find it curious that the guy's family is willing to help him pay for a vacation, when the guy is unemployed? Presumably, if he didn't even complete a high school education, the family must not be financially stable, either. So OP needs to ask herself, why is the family so willing to fund a (completely optional) vacation for their son to meet a total stranger?

They tend to borrow money from each other for travel if they can get a visa

and it would not help to meet in a foreign country as meeting his family is so important at the Casa embassy if she was to go further with her plan

Understand OP that getting any visa approved for him to come to the US means you are going to make several trips to Morocco to get an approval

work visa is out as no company here would apply for one for him as he has no special education and work experience and he can't apply on his own for one

student visa is out as he has no high school diploma so no college and no money to pay for it

tourist visa to US -not for a single man in Morocco with a gf in the US

 

You have good reason to have concerns 

to be honest you don't sound like you have strong feelings for him or you wouldn't hesitate

[aaron2020 11,651]

3 hours ago, Annonymus said:

Hello everyone,

 

I met a mwondeful Moroccan guy in a dating site back in January. He is 25 and I’m 33 .  I went into that site because I was going through a divorce and I needed someone to talk to. He helped me a lot, listened to me and made me feel a lot better about myself.  We started of playing and joking for like around 2 weeks to a month. Then as we started sharing pictures of each other and he told me... I have a heart full of love but not money (LOL) at the moment I took it as a joke. But as We kept talking I realized what he said. He meant it, it’s really difficult for him to get a job there specially because he hasn’t finished high school. He told me I’m his motivation and that he will now get it for me so we can have a better life together. I did tell him at one point that I could visit him so he can get an invite for a visa. He still told me he would marry me without knowing me (is that a red flag?). Also, my friends and I were going to go there together but at first he was okay with everything and then he insist that he wants me to go by myself. He say he would be more confortable to be just him and I. Him and I have an agreement, he can come to usa and work and if things work out we will have a relationship. If not, we will stay friends. Should I still go visit Morocco by myself? 

You can't invite anyone for a visa.  They have to apply on their own.  Invitations by a US person is not considered.

Without a high school education, there is zero chances of a work visa.

 

Why doesn't he want your friends to go?  To keep you isolated so he can apply pressure to marry or file a fiancee visa.  He doesn't want your friends to give you warnings if anything is suspicious.  

 

He wants to marry you without having met you after a few months.

Run girl.  Run.  

[Marieke H 2,521]

Trust your instincts. You obviously have enough doubts to come to a public forum and ask for advice.

 

Already discussing his move to the US seems a bit premature. Maybe you should suggest to him that you are considering moving to Morocco instead, and see how he responds to that. 

 

A lot of people here, including myself, have made a first trip to visit a love interest they had met online. The love interest usually understands how scary that is, and does whatever they can to make it less scary.

 

Go and visit him if you want, but do it how you want to do it. If you feel safer and more comfortable with a friend, bring someone with you. If he can't accept that, he is not worth your time.

[JeanneAdil 6,606]

1 minute ago, Marieke H said:

Trust your instincts. You obviously have enough doubts to come to a public forum and ask for advice.

 

Already discussing his move to the US seems a bit premature. Maybe you should suggest to him that you are considering moving to Morocco instead, and see how he responds to that. 

 

A lot of people here, including myself, have made a first trip to visit a love interest they had met online. The love interest usually understands how scary that is, and does whatever they can to make it less scary.

 

Go and visit him if you want, but do it how you want to do it. If you feel safer and more comfortable with a friend, bring someone with you. If he can't accept that, he is not worth your time.

yep,  i did the same with many and as soon as you mentioned "i've always thought to live out of the US and Morocco looks beautiful "   he may not talk as much and/or disappear entirely

[Lady A 51]

3 hours ago, Annonymus said:

Hello everyone,

 

I met a mwondeful Moroccan guy in a dating site back in January. He is 25 and I’m 33 .  I went into that site because I was going through a divorce and I needed someone to talk to. He helped me a lot, listened to me and made me feel a lot better about myself.  We started of playing and joking for like around 2 weeks to a month. Then as we started sharing pictures of each other and he told me... I have a heart full of love but not money (LOL) at the moment I took it as a joke. But as We kept talking I realized what he said. He meant it, it’s really difficult for him to get a job there specially because he hasn’t finished high school. He told me I’m his motivation and that he will now get it for me so we can have a better life together. I did tell him at one point that I could visit him so he can get an invite for a visa. He still told me he would marry me without knowing me (is that a red flag?). Also, my friends and I were going to go there together but at first he was okay with everything and then he insist that he wants me to go by myself. He say he would be more confortable to be just him and I. Him and I have an agreement, he can come to usa and work and if things work out we will have a relationship. If not, we will stay friends. Should I still go visit Morocco by myself? 

Run!!!! 🚩 🚩 🚩 

[Lu & Ni 30]

DR is such a beautiful country to visit but bring friends so in case it doesn't work out you can still enjoy your trip.

B U T 

To be honest with you..I wouldn't do it. It feels as though he wants to take advantage of you ( I could be wrong but that how's looking)

[JeanneAdil 6,606]

16 minutes ago, Lady A said:

Run!!!! 🚩 🚩 🚩 

she will not as her title calls him her bf and she says he is a wonderful man so best we can do is advise what to look out for

[African Zealot 1,455]

We’re not fortune tellers so we can’t tell however you already know it’s a bad idea. 😂😁😂

 

Good luck!

Edited April 6, 2021 by African Zealot

[Suze1 366]

A Few Questions That Could Use Some Answering

• Is Morocco a high visa fraud country, generally? If so, why?
• If you told him that you would prefer to move to Morocco, how would he react?
• Are you of the same religion? If you told him you have no plans to change religions no matter who you marry, how would he react?
• Has he introduced you to his family, and friends, online, via video chat?
• Has he taken you for a video tour of his house, bedroom, area, etc.?
• Have you had 1 or more close friends video chat with him, and gotten their opinion?

 

Edited April 6, 2021 by Suze1

[Annonymus 6]

1 hour ago, Marieke H said:

Trust your instincts. You obviously have enough doubts to come to a public forum and ask for advice.

 

Already discussing his move to the US seems a bit premature. Maybe you should suggest to him that you are considering moving to Morocco instead, and see how he responds to that. 

 

A lot of people here, including myself, have made a first trip to visit a love interest they had met online. The love interest usually understands how scary that is, and does whatever they can to make it less scary.

 

Go and visit him if you want, but do it how you want to do it. If you feel safer and more comfortable with a friend, bring someone with you. If he can't accept that, he is not worth your time.

He said. I will do whatever you want at the end.... he told me I will do as you want.