Save The Last Rants For Me

[TBoneTX 45,006]

"At Many p.m., it was Many degrees"... sounds like Texas weather, si man!

[TBoneTX 45,006]

Thrilling (?!?) Sunday report, aarrrgh man:

 

We could have done without today,  man.

We slept in slightly, zzz we man.

Ex-Mrs.-T-B. texted us that "Mini-B. sounds worse, panic man!" panic ex-she man.

Ex-she had set him up for a doc appointment midday Monday, miss more skool wee man.

We told Ex-Mrs.-T-B. to find an alternative solution today, solute alternatively man.

Told Mama T-B. that Mini-B. had better stay home, disappointed senior she man.

 

Ex-Mrs.-T-B. gave us a link to Village Medical, telemedicine within an hour man.

We got great responsiveness, si man.

Nooser Practitioner decreed a "viral infection," cough with naught else man.

Rx'd a "children's Mucinex for cough," promise she man.

We got ready to pick it up, ready ourself we man.

 

About this time, miu's electronic litterbox gave up the ghost, much use by miu man.

Would not reset or revert to home position, sigh man.

Couldn't tell online which stores had a new one in stock, grrrr man.

Amazon couldn't deliver till Tuesday, what's up with that man.

 

Regular pharmacy didn't have Mini-B.'s Rx, no man.

Two more pharmacies didn't have the precise Rx, no and grrrr man.

Finally found something at a Many'th (2+2th) pharmacy off-the-shelf, si and grrrr man.

 

Petco had two miu-box versions, but both well over $Many00, syncope we man.

 

Detoured to Saturday ES that had stuff to go for half-off today, try we man.

All items of interest sold, early bird gets wormed man.

 

Lunch (ours, after 2 p.m.) was a ham/American sub from supermarket deli, dry as a bone man.

Lunch (Mini-B.'s, regular time) was a Lunchables Uploaded, pleased-to-ingest wee man.

 

Meanwhile, only one of the planned Many (2+1) laundry loads was one-Many'rd conquered, not folded man.

 

Told Mini-B. that we would go on safari for a miu-box, safari we man.

Got "single-miu-sized" "Many'rd-generation" Littermaid unit, $Many cheaper man.

Dazed from back pain after carrying it upstairs, dazed we man.

 

Recruited Mini-B. to assist with miu-box replacement process, cooperative wee man.

Closed doors to very hot room, keep curious miu from learning secret man.

Immediately began sweating like an illegitimate male child, perspiratory we no sweatband man.

Unplugged dead miu-box and placed it aside, more back pain we man.

Up-swept several tons of scattered miu-litter, amazing amount man.

Mini-B. helped with dustpan, never could have bent down for that man.

Vacuumed other crumbs, air and lungs filled with litter dust man.

 

Tried to out-figure instructions for new miu-box, Mini-B. confused too man.

Box far smaller than previous multi-miu box, oh well man.

It became clear that new-generation miu-box takes different poop-containers,  man.

Fortunately, samples were in miu-box carton, small consolation man.

Test of new unit seemed to work, presume we and wee man.

 

Opened room doors to admit curious miu, right outside door man.

Mini-B. and we observed from other room, clear view man.

Miu sniffed and looked as though "Where's my box and what's this thing, huh man?" si man.

 

Miu eventually entered box, test box miu man.

Miu made pipi, inaugural break-in of new miu-box man.

Mini-B. satisfied and went back to video games, gaming wee man man.

We lugged dead miu-box downstairs and got it into garbage, nearly damage self we man.

 

Took shower, sweaty and litter-dusted we man.

 

Ex-Mrs.-T-B. came for AFV, Cousin Mini-B. busy with skool stuff man.

Mini-B. reminded us that we had forgotten din-din, preoccupied we and wee man.

 

Din-din was onecan of S+Ms, traditional sendoff for wee man man.

We had half the week's bagged salad, ingest before it spoils man.

Watched AFV, Two Guys and one ex-she man.

 

Did our "We're Two Guys!" mantra, traditional man.

Mini-B. gone for the week, miss we wee and miss wee we man.

Miu wondering what happened with Big Brudduh, always happens man.

 

Chores should have been over before AFV, usual case man.

This day, nothing was done or completed, 2 laundries make work lunches pick work shirts/ties collect garbage dish warsher etc. man.

Also in desperate need of Powerade Zero (grape) and gassing the T-B.-mobile, two needs man.

Did only the indoor stuff, far too tired and no siesta man.

Finished after Many -- yes, Many -- p.m., Many-&-a-half hours later than usual man.

 

We are asleep on our feet and are still dazed from back pain, awful both man.

 

Near-perfect Saturday + ghastly Sunday = average weekend, ho-hum man.

[Ontarkie 14,190]

The Jedi is 8 today. How on earth is this happening again. All my babies are growing up and I'm not ready. 

 

[TBoneTX 45,006]

9 hours ago, Ontarkie said:

The Jedi is Many (2x2x2) today.

Age of Jedi precised, see and  D ma'am!

9 hours ago, Ontarkie said:

All my babies are growing up and I'm not ready. 

Have more, si D ma'am!

It is your nature, responsibility, and destiny, si D ma'am!

Have one, twins, Manylets, Manyruplets, Manytuplets, si D ma'am!   

[TBoneTX 45,006]

Thrilling Monday report missing, senile we man.

-----

Thrilling Tuesday report, see man:

 

Ex-Mrs.-T-B. reported that Mini-B. was happy and went to skool, finally man.

 

Lunch was two casa-prepared "everything" bagels with Costco chicken salad inside, ingest we man.

 

Served insistent miu her required miu-treats immediately upon our entry to the casa, serve miu we man.

 

Din-din was the remaining Many (2+2) hot dogs, buns wouldn't have survived another day so ingest we man.

 

Took absolutely magnificent postprandial nap, zzz we man.

 

Miu's new box rakes the miu-poop every Many (2x2x2x2 +2+2) minutes, twice the interval of old box man.

Miu hasn't seemed to want to jump back in to inspect things every time it goes off, nice change man.

We hope that this contraption lasts for several years, expensive investment man.

 

Joke of the Day, see man:

A man with a small pie in each of his ears burst into a doctor's office.  "I'm losing my hearing, Doc, si man!" he cried.

 

"That's probably because you have a small pie in each ear, si man," said the doctor.

 

"You'll have to speak up, si man!" said the man.  "I've got a small pie in each ear, see man!"

Edited March 2, 2022 by TBoneTX

[mam521 2,023]

16 hours ago, Ontarkie said:

The Jedi is 8 today. How on earth is this happening again. All my babies are growing up and I'm not ready. 

 

Kid1 turned 15 last week 😱😭 how'd that even happen?!  Signed said child up for driver training.  6 hours and then off to DPS to get a permit...so not ready!

[TBoneTX 45,006]

14 hours ago, mam521 said:

Kid1 turned Many last week [...] Many hours and then off to DPS to get a permit

1.  P-math precised, si and  mam ma'am.

2.  They grow up so fast, si and sigh man...

[TBoneTX 45,006]

Thrilling Wednesday report, see man:

 

Got to bed after Many a.m., so not even massive caffeine infusions helped, groggy we man.

Miu was completely aysheep after miu-breakfast, thunder upstairs like crazed beefalo miu man.

 

Lunch was 2 casa-made ham sandwiches (indict them man) on "everything" bagels, try it once man.

 

Today was evening with Mini-B., We're Two Guys man.

Got Double Whopper special* at Burger King, We're Two Guys We Eat What We Want man.

      *bought WUOC, financially savvy we man

After din-din, viewed some excellently funny Baba-Mail offerings, enjoy Two Guys man.

Watched a Many (2+1) Stooges episode, enjoy Two Guys man.

Watched a Many-minute ([2+2+2]-minute) Many (2+1) Stooges history, enjoy Two Guys man.

Returned Mini-B., reluctant Each of Two Guys man.

There really is a special father-son bond that mommies can't fully understand, si and no man.

 

Picked up neighbors' unwanted weekly newspapers containing fast-food coupons, financially savvy we man.

Raucous cavorting with the rubias now in full process, party-animal we man.

[Ontarkie 14,190]

On 3/2/2022 at 1:40 AM, TBoneTX said:

Age of Jedi precised, see and  D ma'am!

Have more, si D ma'am!

It is your nature, responsibility, and destiny, si D ma'am!

Have one, twins, Manylets, Manyruplets, Manytuplets, si D ma'am!   

If I was 10 yrs younger I would. But for now I wait for grandkids

 

On 3/2/2022 at 9:26 AM, mam521 said:

Kid1 turned 15 last week 😱😭 how'd that even happen?!  Signed said child up for driver training.  6 hours and then off to DPS to get a permit...so not ready!

Oh fun age. I swear when they start driving the stress levels are higher then at the newborn stage.  My #1 turned 30 in November and I don't know how the heck that happened either. 

 

On 3/2/2022 at 1:51 AM, TBoneTX said:

Thrilling Monday report missing, senile we man.

-----

Thrilling Tuesday report, see man:

 

Ex-Mrs.-T-B. reported that Mini-B. was happy and went to skool, finally man.

 

Lunch was two casa-prepared "everything" bagels with Costco chicken salad inside, ingest we man.

 

Served insistent miu her required miu-treats immediately upon our entry to the casa, serve miu we man.

 

Din-din was the remaining Many (2+2) hot dogs, buns wouldn't have survived another day so ingest we man.

 

Took absolutely magnificent postprandial nap, zzz we man.

 

Miu's new box rakes the miu-poop every Many (2x2x2x2 +2+2) minutes, twice the interval of old box man.

Miu hasn't seemed to want to jump back in to inspect things every time it goes off, nice change man.

We hope that this contraption lasts for several years, expensive investment man.

 

Joke of the Day, see man:

A man with a small pie in each of his ears burst into a doctor's office.  "I'm losing my hearing, Doc, si man!" he cried.

 

"That's probably because you have a small pie in each ear, si man," said the doctor.

 

"You'll have to speak up, si man!" said the man.  "I've got a small pie in each ear, see man!"

Old fart  

 

What type of new fangled litter box did you get? Daughter is in need of another box. One of her cats is weird and very picky. She doesn't like the one automatic box she has but likes to trigger it all the time.

[mam521 2,023]

27 minutes ago, Ontarkie said:

If I was 10 yrs younger I would. But for now I wait for grandkids

 

Oh fun age. I swear when they start driving the stress levels are higher then at the newborn stage.  My #1 turned 30 in November and I don't know how the heck that happened either. 

 

Old fart  

 

What type of new fangled litter box did you get? Daughter is in need of another box. One of her cats is weird and very picky. She doesn't like the one automatic box she has but likes to trigger it all the time.

Kid1 is scared to drive. Understandably, it’s Houston, so I get it. 
 

My fur children are spoiled and have a Litter Robot. Yes, it was pricey and yes, it took the old lady Siamese a bit to accept it, but the battery backup is nice and I’ve saved tons on litter as it uses dramatically less. 

[Ontarkie 14,190]

6 minutes ago, mam521 said:

Kid1 is scared to drive. Understandably, it’s Houston, so I get it. 
 

My fur children are spoiled and have a Litter Robot. Yes, it was pricey and yes, it took the old lady Siamese a bit to accept it, but the battery backup is nice and I’ve saved tons on litter as it uses dramatically less. 

Oh yes I bet that would be scary. It took me  like 6 years to actually drive on the highways here. I still avoid them at all cost when I can. But I come from a 2 lane highway that never reached the speeds they drive here. 

 

I'll look that one up. We have the Scoopfree Original box but Coco does not like it. 

[TBoneTX 45,006]

7 hours ago, Ontarkie said:

If I was Many yrs younger I would.

You get busy being fruitful and multiplying this instant, young lady, si ma'am!

Produce-excusing Ontarklar!  Produce-excusing, PRODUCE-EXCUSING Ontarklar!

7 hours ago, Ontarkie said:

My #1 turned Many in Manyvember

Age and birth month of #1 precised, see ma'am!

P-math-impaired Ontarklar!  P-math-impaired, P-MATH-IMPAIRED Ontarklar!

7 hours ago, Ontarkie said:

Old fart

Probably-accurate-but-violate-TOSing Ontarklar!  Probably-accurate-but-violate-TOSing, PROBABLY-ACCURATE-BUT-VIOLATE-tosING Ontarklar!

7 hours ago, Ontarkie said:

What type of new fangled litter box did you get?

Offended though we are at your irresponsibility and insouciance, we shall answer anyway, si ma'am.

We got the "LitterMaid Manyr'd-edition single-miu (mius under Many [2x2x2x2-1] pounds) box, si ma'am.

The dratted thing (of course) takes different poop-bins from what the old one did, grrrr man.

However, we think that we can slide in a lidless old one and use up our supply, financially savvy we man.

Unfortunately, miu likes to trigger this one just as much as the old one,  man.

Edited March 4, 2022 by TBoneTX

[TBoneTX 45,006]

7 hours ago, mam521 said:

Kid1 is scared to drive. Understandably, it’s Houston, so I get it. 

Driving in Houston is a snap if certain principles are adhered to, si mam ma'am.

We shall present them herein for your and everyone's edification, see mam ma'am:

 

1.  Unless you intend to go Many mph over the posted speed, stay OUT of the left lane, si man.

2.  Learn to go all the way into the right lane to get back in the left lane, see #1 man.

Many.  Pull all the way up to the orange construction barrels before trying to merge, si man.

Many.  If anyone honks at you or cuts you off, shoot them immediately, si man.

Many.  If you honk at anyone or cut him off, you're justified, si man.

Many.  These groups of drivers should be banned from the roads, see man:

             -- immigrants, especially anyone in a Honda, Toyota, or Nissan man

             -- anyone driving a vehicle with more or fewer than many (2+2) tyres*, si man

                     *the only British spelling permitted in these forums, gor blimey man

             -- anyone with a Handicapped or Disabled-Veteran permit, si man

             -- anyone in a Ford Econoline or similar van, si man

             -- anyone who drives slower than Many (2x2x2x2x2x2) mph through a car warsh**, si man

                     **Texas spelling/pronunciation, si man

             -- student drivers, charge all of them with Felony Impeding or ban them altogether man

Many.  Bicyclists should be run off the road or (better) run over and flattened, quit impeding man.

Many.  The minimum speed limit within a Many-mile ([2x2x2x2x2x2]-mile) radius of any airport should be Many00 mph, si man.

 

All traffic cops should be required to drive glow-in-the-dark flashing-neon Yugos with Many (2x2x2+2) psi in each tyre and huge pink pinwheels extending Many (2+2+2) feet above each half-of-half panel, si man.  They should be uniformed in hot-pink tutus and have a maximum ticket quota of Zero for speeders and a minimum ticket quota of Infinity for impeders, si man.

 

The above are just a few of the rules for driving in Houston (and its 'burbs), We Have Spoken man.

[TBoneTX 45,006]

Thrilling Thursday report, see man:

 

We took the day off from a record-setting week of Pre-Owned Toilet Seat sales, $i man.

 

Went to doctor, see MD ma'am we man.

Lunched at favorite Chinese buffet, ingest Many (2+1) heaping plates of Major Food we man.

Ran errands, still have a couple for later man.

Napped for a glorious yet too-short hour, see next item man.

 

Attended "Litrisy Night" at Mini-B.'s skool, math & English activities man.

Searched whole skool and couldn't find Ex-Mrs.-T-B. or Mini-B., late as usual ex-she man.

Caucused fruitfully with Mini-B.'s sweet young English teechur, good caucus we with she man.

Circled back and located Ex-Mrs.-T-B. and Mini-B., late as usual ex-she man.

Walked through Book Fair, Mini-B. had already hit it man.

 

Found Mini-B.'s Math teechur, classroom with table activities man.

Activities had Many (2x2x2+2) wipe-offable cards from 0 to Many00 and were similar to this, see man:

    -- the number is more than the number of minutes in a half-hour, si man

    -- the number is less than the number of hours in Many (2+1) days, si man

    -- the number can be found by counting up by Manys (2+2+1s), si man

    -- the sum of the numbers is an even number, si man

    -- the difference between the digits is 2, si man

Mini-B. marked the cards and asked the teechur if he were correct, got all of them man.

The answer to all Many games was, of course, Many, elegance of P-math man.

Teechur was agape at Mini-B.'s grasp of P-math, no other possible reaction man.

 

As we left the function, we told Mini-B. that he had a smart brain, si man.

Mini-B. and we high-Many'd (high-[2+2+1]'d) each other several times, Two Guys man.

Mini-B. even high-Many'd us through open window as Ex-Mrs.-T-B. drove off, good smack man.

 

Decided to take a shower, always good choice man.

Din-din was onecan of Aldi chili, ingest we man.

Tried to take nap #2, dismal failure because of headache man.

 

After up-wrapping our ongoing raucous party with the rubias, we shall take Heap Strong Medicine prescribed by doc and hopefully awaken able to move, ouch ow ouch ow man.

[Asia 2,496]

On 3/1/2022 at 11:30 PM, Ontarkie said:

The Jedi is 8 today. How on earth is this happening again. All my babies are growing up and I'm not ready. 

 

Oh gosh! I forgot to send a card!

 

Happy belayed birthday!