Extreme Hardship and the Meeting Rule

[JeanneAdil 6,644]

1 hour ago, replaysports said:

I'm with you... never met the person in person and they are already in talks about marriage... thats insane! ITs like the threads you read about in 2-3 years later about the immigration fraud after...

 

 

And i would think the K1 is a bad idea

this OP is already caring for enough people without adding another that can not work for an extended long time and needs also to be cared for in the light of needing health care insurance and room and board, etc.   Plus K1 is  more expensive than the CR1 in the long run.

 

and what is his country of origin?   very important 

 

No one here will discourage being in love

no one here will discourage meeting and then deciding to marry

but we will tell you the pitfalls of immigration so you can avoid major issues

Edited January 4, 2021 by JeanneAdil

[Boiler 46,096]

A lot of African students study in the ex USSR, so I suppose Nigerian, Ugandan or somewhere close.

[Adventine 3,210]

I am sorry for the OP's situation but agree that they need to spend much more time in person before deciding on such a big step as marriage. 

 

If the OP has already taken into consideration that the K1 visa holder cannot work for many months, I hope they have not assumed that the foreign fiancé/spouse could help at home as the father's caregiver. 

 

Helping out one's in laws is great but the OP's father "needs 24hr care". Add to this, the foreign fiancé is in medical school. From the outside, this situation could easily be seen as bringing in someone to work without proper authorization.

[SunflowerSweet 1,321]

If I’m being honest I don’t think your chances of getting the requirements needed for a waiver are very high. I definitely do think your partner should apply for a visitor visa once the opportunity opens back up. 

 

If your argument is that you can’t travel to *him* because of your father, and he can’t travel to *you* because he can’t get the correct visa, you’re going to want to actually show him getting denied the visa. It’s a weak argument that gets even weaker if you haven’t at least tried having him visit you.

Edited January 4, 2021 by MorganandMichael

[SteveInBostonI130 3,483]

19 hours ago, weedavit said:

We don’t know what to do. We are at our wit’s end. Again, I know our situation is unconventional, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong. And we genuinely love each other and want to be together.

 

I read that there are some exceptions (though I know they’re rare) to the “meeting within two years” rule. The only examples I have seen that describe extreme hardship are situations in which the US fiancé is physically disabled and unable to travel. But I was wondering if my situation might qualify as extreme hardship, since I have virtually no way to travel, and my father relies on me for everything. 

Hello,

 

My condolences on your loss and I truly sympathise with your current difficult situation.  Unfortunately, USCIS is not there to help with immigration or relationships.  They are there to determine if those applying for immigration meet all the requirements set in law and/or policy.  The extreme hardship waiver is very difficult to obtain because it becomes a judgement call of the person processing it.  It is easier to deny rather than to justify granting it when faced with questions by their superiors, or if something goes wrong and the relationship turned out to be fraudulent.  

 

Please let us know where your boyfriend is from.  There may be other countries he can visit without a visa.  Ukrainians, for example, can visit Mexico with an electronic travel authorization.

 

In your situation, I would recommend you meet with your boyfriend as much as possible, marry, and then apply for a spouse visa.  It is less expensive overall and, more importantly, he can work as soon as he arrives in the US.  

[Mike E 11,742]

I agree with others that you won't get a waiver.

 

18 hours ago, weedavit said:

But we then hit another roadblock, because every dang flight transits though the US, which we then learned requires a transit visa for him.

It is a mystery to me why there so few nonstop flights from Latin America to the English speaking Caribbean countries. 

 

So the work around is to limit your options to Spanish speaking countries, including Mexico, and countries in central America and in the Caribbean. 

 

Also note that getting a single ticket for desirable routings is not always possible and instead multiple  tickets are needed. So your fiance will want to carry a duffel bag on board the flight versus checking a bag.

 

So be more creative on routings and destinations. For example, Check out:

 

Your fiance is in the Ukraine. Turkish Airlines flies out of the Ukraine. Presumably a visa for Panama won't be needed or isn't hard to get for your fiance. Though, we don't know the nationality of your fiance. 

 

Costa Rica is an attractive option as you can get married there and go the CR-1 route if you want.

 

 

Edited January 4, 2021 by Mike E

[mushroomspore 3,044]

21 hours ago, weedavit said:

Hi everyone, I’m looking for advice for an extremely unfortunate situation I am in. 
 

I met my fiancé three years ago. We met via a Christian group on Facebook, and began communicating after feeling really connected to one another and excited over how many things we had in common. The friendship grew for over a year and we realized we’d really like to pursue it as a relationship, regardless of distance and the unusual, unconventional circumstances. 
 

It has been three years in total now. We video call for hours on weekends, and message each other during all our free time. We’ve corresponded with each other’s families, and my father has even been on board with this relationship (which says a lot...he’s very old fashioned and strict). We have decided we would like to marry. But here’s the issue.

 

I have been and continue to be, incapable of visiting him due to what I would consider extreme hardship. Both of my parents have had serious ailments for many years and I have been their main caretaker. My mother had two bouts of cancer treatments. She was then diagnosed with an extremely rare, terminal disease. Devastatingly, she passed away a couple of months ago after a long battle. My father is a high fracture risk and is practically wheelchair bound at this point. 
 

I am sorry for going into so much detail, but I just wanted to emphasize how impossible it is for me to find the ability to travel. I dropped out of college in my junior year in 2014 to take care of my parents, and I have been out ever since. Many relatives live out of town. And the ones who do live relatively close by aren’t willing to help. So in other words, I have had absolutely no way to visit this wonderful man that I love and want to marry. We are genuine. We have considered every possible option of trying to meet, but nothing is feasible due to my dad’s need for 24hr care. My fiancé is not from a country with a visa waiver program, and we are certain he is ineligible for a visa, because he’s still in medical school and would have very few ties to homeland. And even if we thought we’d have a chance, he couldn’t apply anyway since all embassies worldwide are closed due to COVID.

 

We don’t know what to do. We are at our wit’s end. Again, I know our situation is unconventional, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong. And we genuinely love each other and want to be together.

 

I read that there are some exceptions (though I know they’re rare) to the “meeting within two years” rule. The only examples I have seen that describe extreme hardship are situations in which the US fiancé is physically disabled and unable to travel. But I was wondering if my situation might qualify as extreme hardship, since I have virtually no way to travel, and my father relies on me for everything. 
 

Thank you all for listening. I’m sorry for the length of this post. My family has gone through a lot and this whole thing is so depressing. Please be kind  God bless 

I sympathize with your difficult situation. But USCIS and the consulates/embassies are law enforcement. They look at applicants and petitioners and determine whether the couple meets the LEGAL requirements for immigration as well as determine whether your romantic relationship appears to be legitimate and NOT falsified simply for immigration benefits. Even if you were able to see your boyfriend tomorrow somewhere, that would be one in-person visit in three years. That is not nearly enough to convince a federal agent that your relationship is real. Before you go into the legal process, you need to arrange some major in-person time together first to set a good foundation that can be presented to the immigration officials.

 

And as others have pointed out, it's extremely risky to be discussing marriage and serious long-term commitment with someone you have never actually met in person. There is no way to know what your chemistry and relationship are actually like until you meet face to face. 

Edited January 4, 2021 by mushroomspore

[Orangesapples 1,954]

20 minutes ago, mushroomspore said:

I sympathize with your difficult situation. But USCIS and the consulates/embassies are law enforcement. They look at applicants and petitioners and determine whether the couple meets the LEGAL requirements for immigration as well as determine whether your romantic relationship appears to be legitimate and NOT falsified simply for immigration benefits. Even if you were able to see your boyfriend tomorrow somewhere, that would be one in-person visit in three years. That is not nearly enough to convince a federal agent that your relationship is real. Before you go into the legal process, you need to arrange some major in-person time together first to set a good foundation that can be presented to the immigration officials.

 

And as others have pointed out, it's extremely risky to be discussing marriage and serious long-term commitment with someone you have never actually met in person. There is no way to know what your chemistry and relationship are actually like until you meet face to face. 

One meeting prior to filing can be enough, depending on the country of origin. My now husband and I only had one in person meeting before he was filed, then we saw each other again before the interview and my interview lasted about 5 minutes with very easy and straightforward questions (I think only one or two questions). 

[mushroomspore 3,044]

8 minutes ago, Orangesapples said:

One meeting prior to filing can be enough, depending on the country of origin. My now husband and I only had one in person meeting before he was filed, then we saw each other again before the interview and my interview lasted about 5 minutes with very easy and straightforward questions (I think only one or two questions). 

Oh yeah good point about the country of origin. It also does depend on the interviewer. Some will be more lenient about amount of face-time and others may be more of a hard-butt about it.

[aaron2020 11,651]

Until OP decides to share where her fiance is from, it's hard to advise on her options.

Waiver of the meeting requirement will be extremely difficult; if not impossible.  

[p&g 9]

Can you meet your fiancé in Turkey? 

He may not need a visa for Turkey, which would remove that stress. US citizens need a visa, but you can apply online, answer a few questions, and pay ~$50.

My fiancé and I recently looked at flights going to Barbados since I have an uncle working remotely from there. I found that the flight to Barbados, with a layover, was about the same time as a direct flight to Turkey (~9 hours). His flight from Tunisia would be ~20 hours, and he would need to transit through London AND go through customs to re-check his luggage.

We met in Turkey in November. It was much less complicated. We kept the trip low-key and mostly played house in an Airbnb.

[stuckonyou 75]

On 1/3/2021 at 10:15 PM, weedavit said:

Hi everyone, I’m looking for advice for an extremely unfortunate situation I am in. 
 

I met my fiancé three years ago. We met via a Christian group on Facebook, and began communicating after feeling really connected to one another and excited over how many things we had in common. The friendship grew for over a year and we realized we’d really like to pursue it as a relationship, regardless of distance and the unusual, unconventional circumstances. 
 

It has been three years in total now. We video call for hours on weekends, and message each other during all our free time. We’ve corresponded with each other’s families, and my father has even been on board with this relationship (which says a lot...he’s very old fashioned and strict). We have decided we would like to marry. But here’s the issue.

 

I have been and continue to be, incapable of visiting him due to what I would consider extreme hardship. Both of my parents have had serious ailments for many years and I have been their main caretaker. My mother had two bouts of cancer treatments. She was then diagnosed with an extremely rare, terminal disease. Devastatingly, she passed away a couple of months ago after a long battle. My father is a high fracture risk and is practically wheelchair bound at this point. 
 

I am sorry for going into so much detail, but I just wanted to emphasize how impossible it is for me to find the ability to travel. I dropped out of college in my junior year in 2014 to take care of my parents, and I have been out ever since. Many relatives live out of town. And the ones who do live relatively close by aren’t willing to help. So in other words, I have had absolutely no way to visit this wonderful man that I love and want to marry. We are genuine. We have considered every possible option of trying to meet, but nothing is feasible due to my dad’s need for 24hr care. My fiancé is not from a country with a visa waiver program, and we are certain he is ineligible for a visa, because he’s still in medical school and would have very few ties to homeland. And even if we thought we’d have a chance, he couldn’t apply anyway since all embassies worldwide are closed due to COVID.

 

We don’t know what to do. We are at our wit’s end. Again, I know our situation is unconventional, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong. And we genuinely love each other and want to be together.

 

I read that there are some exceptions (though I know they’re rare) to the “meeting within two years” rule. The only examples I have seen that describe extreme hardship are situations in which the US fiancé is physically disabled and unable to travel. But I was wondering if my situation might qualify as extreme hardship, since I have virtually no way to travel, and my father relies on me for everything. 
 

Thank you all for listening. I’m sorry for the length of this post. My family has gone through a lot and this whole thing is so depressing. Please be kind  God bless 

 

I'm a Christian too and I met my fiancé on a Christian dating app almost two years ago. We've been talking every day since then and also fell in love and talked about marriage before we'd even met (and when we did meet it just felt so right and we got engaged and filed for the K1). I know some people here don't understand that part, and honestly neither did I before it happened to me. I get that people are skeptical, but don't let that discourage you. Just keep on fighting to somehow get a chance to meet each other so you can file for K1 or CR1. CR1 might make more sense if he's originally from a high fraud country, though.

 

If you want/need anyone to talk to and to keep you in prayer that's also in this immigration process feel free to send me a private message. ❤️

[Maki&Kiki 123]

It would be really good if you could find a way to meet him. As somebody else mentioned before, online and real world can be very much different. I know how you feel because fiancé and I have spent so much time talking to each other online and we knew we love each other, but reality is that you have to meet the person in real and spend time together so you can be sure. 

 

I know this may sound harsh, but there are way too many love scams, and because of that USCIS will not go easy on anybody. 

 

Maybe the best solution would be to wait for Corona situation to calm down, then go on with the plan to meet your loved one in Bahamas or other country. Tourist Visa is possible but very hard to obtain, as he will have to be honest and say the purpose of the trip. Officer may focus on questions about relationship you two share and then not ask for any proof he brought to deny him straight forward (happened to me in 2018 😭). But it's worth a try as application for tourist visa is not that expensive, and you never know.

 

Anyways I wish you best of luck and don't give up!