Suspected fraud/potential VAWA

[Nitas_man 3,100]

1 hour ago, JFH said:

I’m wondering if the OP would be so keen to meddle with the cousin’s affairs if immigration wasn’t a factor? If the cousin had married a local girl who had only married him for money and was taking him for a ride, what then?

 

I do get the impression that the OP is more bothered about having “the immigrant” punished or removed from the country than helping the cousin resolve his marital problems. It’s not the first time we have seen someone thinking that a cheating/lazy/unloving spouse doesn’t “deserve” a green card, like the USCs hold the keys to the gates of the country and GCs are rewards for being “spouse of the year”.

Probably has to do with being on the hook for 40 quarters of SS earnings which would not be the case if OP’s cousin was simply divorcing a local girl

[Orangesapples 1,954]

34 minutes ago, Ray.Bonaquist said:

I think it would be better if forumers  stick to immigration advice and allow the original poster to determine if it’s his business to interfere in his cousins immigration affairs.

 

You’re not privy to the depth or otherwise of the relationship he has with his cousin which makes him feel it’s his responsibility to “meddle”. 

 

To the OP I support your efforts to scuttle her immigration benefit application (although what you can actually accomplish is limited) if you believe she’s using him. She shouldn’t be allowed an easy ride to legal status in the land of milk and honey at his expense.

 

Go for it, get her Buster! 😁

OP is not the one to decide what someone else is allowed to do. OP received all the immigration advice concerning him - which is none, because his cousin's ex wife immigration is not his issue in the slightest. If the cousin or his the wife came here, that would be a different matter. 

[Orangesapples 1,954]

3 minutes ago, Nitas_man said:

Probably has to do with being on the hook for 40 quarters of SS earnings which would not be the case if OP’s cousin was simply divorcing a local girl

It's unlikely he will have to pay anything. And even if he did, it's on the cousin to look out for that. 

[African Zealot 1,455]

10 minutes ago, Orangesapples said:

OP is not the one to decide what someone else is allowed to do.

Neither are you the one to decide what OP is allowed to do. It works both ways.

[Orangesapples 1,954]

5 minutes ago, Ray.Bonaquist said:

Neither are you the one to decide what OP is allowed to do. It works both ways.

He's asking for advice, he's given one. Also, no one vj has any authority on who's allowed to get immigration benefits. 

Edited December 29, 2020 by Orangesapples

[laylalex 7,293]

8 minutes ago, Orangesapples said:

He's asking for advice, he's given one. Also, no one vj has any authority on who's allowed to get immigration benefits. 

And I'm trying to think how a secondhand statement from someone not in the marriage about whether the marriage is a fraud or not is going to go anywhere but the "circular file" at USCIS. We read all the time about how useless ex-spouses'/ex-partners'/family members' letters to USCIS are when sent to "warn" -- why is this somehow worth anything more than "I think my daughter is getting scammed" letters?

Edited December 29, 2020 by laylalex
To match edited quote.

[TBoneTX 45,825]

Two noncontributory posts have been removed.

Please stop badgering the OP and each other, or the thread will be locked.

[Friedgreentomato 1]

So I have been far more intimately involved in this case than I first let on (this is a public forum after all) and I have left out a lot of details and the situation is extremely complex and an absolute nightmare. Their relationship has been high-conflict and highly toxic from day one, and they broke up after only a few months. On the surface the VAWA claim looks completely legitimate and she has dozens of incriminating text messages from him, but what recently came to light is just how much she has been deliberately provoking him, and how much abusive behavior there has been on both sides. I have transcripts of text messages from her where she has admitted to this. And the verbal abuse began after the marriage broke down and he told her to move out, which would have given her a huge motive to escalate their fights to the max to build her abuse case. It was hard for me to believe at first, but it really seems possible that this was all planned out from the get go. At the very least it was her back up plan. Their marriage was riddled with red flags and I was stunned that she would have chosen someone like him to do this with. But if she had had VAWA in mind all along, their marriage makes a LOT more sense. Target a good looking "bad boy" type who is emotionally volatile, push a few of his buttons and voila! A rock solid VAWA case! But I am sure this will be extremely difficult to prove.

 

To add to the story, their attorney just so happens to be her boss! She started working at an immigration law firm a few months before they got married, as a legal assistant. Would that be considered a conflict of interest on the part of attorney, or could there be any ethics standards that he violated that I could report to someone? Incidentally, I emailed the attorney and he wrote me back a long reply which had "CYA" written all over it, IMO.  

 

[Boiler 45,874]

VAWA would be based on his behavior not hers. He is not involved in the process so even if he wanted to participate he can not.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

15 minutes ago, Friedgreentomato said:

To add to the story, their attorney just so happens to be her boss! She started working at an immigration law firm a few months before they got married, as a legal assistant. Would that be considered a conflict of interest on the part of attorney, or could there be any ethics standards that he violated that I could report to someone? Incidentally, I emailed the attorney and he wrote me back a long reply which had "CYA" written all over it, IMO.  

 

Without knowing which state you're in, I can't definitively state that it isn't a conflict of interest. However, under the ABA Model Rules of Professional Conduct (which most states have adopted in one form or another), an employer-employee relationship between attorney and client does not automatically give rise to a conflict. If the boss's representation of the wife is directly adverse to the representation of another client, past or present -- here, most likely the cousin -- yes, that could be a conflict. But there's no conflict inherent in the employer-employee relationship. 

 

I'm not surprised her attorney wouldn't correspond with you in a way that you find satisfactory. He represents his client's interests in an immigration matter, and you are who exactly in this proceeding? I'm frankly surprised he responded at all. You're not your cousin's attorney, nor are you your cousin. I do hope you didn't misrepresent yourself as your cousin to the attorney when corresponding with him. That could come back and bite your cousin through no fault of his own.

 

Free (non-legal) advice, no charge: let your cousin mess up. Even bad boys need to grow up, and this is a growing up experience. Your help is better placed giving your cousin emotional support, and not trampling in his business in which you have zero standing. You have the potential to make things worse for your cousin. It's hard to see those we love suffer. But you are not an attorney, and you are neither a spouse nor a sponsor here. Steer your love for your cousin towards something like being a sympathetic sounding board for him to bounce ideas off of. Make suggestions, but don't run his life. Sometimes letting people mess up is an act of charity. Be charitable.

[Orangesapples 1,954]

2 hours ago, Friedgreentomato said:

. On the surface the VAWA claim looks completely legitimate and she has dozens of incriminating text messages from him, 

So he did abuse her and she has evidence. 

[laylalex 7,293]

25 minutes ago, Orangesapples said:

So he did abuse her and she has evidence. 

It's not like any bad behavior on her side (if it happened) somehow cancels out bad behavior on his side. It's not a zero sum game here.

[milimelo 4,535]

12 hours ago, Friedgreentomato said:

To add to the story, their attorney just so happens to be her boss! She started working at an immigration law firm a few months before they got married, as a legal assistant. Would that be considered a conflict of interest on the part of attorney, or could there be any ethics standards that he violated that I could report to someone? Incidentally, I emailed the attorney and he wrote me back a long reply which had "CYA" written all over it, IMO.  

 

How did the wife start working before marriage? What visa was she on? 

[Friedgreentomato 1]

2 hours ago, milimelo said:

How did the wife start working before marriage? What visa was she on? 

She had filed for asylum. 

[Friedgreentomato 1]

15 hours ago, elmcitymaven said:

Without knowing which state you're in, I can't definitively state that it isn't a conflict of interest. However, under the ABA Model Rules of Professional Conduct (which most states have adopted in one form or another), an employer-employee relationship between attorney and client does not automatically give rise to a conflict. If the boss's representation of the wife is directly adverse to the representation of another client, past or present -- here, most likely the cousin -- yes, that could be a conflict. But there's no conflict inherent in the employer-employee relationship. 

 

I'm not surprised her attorney wouldn't correspond with you in a way that you find satisfactory. He represents his client's interests in an immigration matter, and you are who exactly in this proceeding? I'm frankly surprised he responded at all. You're not your cousin's attorney, nor are you your cousin. I do hope you didn't misrepresent yourself as your cousin to the attorney when corresponding with him. That could come back and bite your cousin through no fault of his own.

 

Free (non-legal) advice, no charge: let your cousin mess up. Even bad boys need to grow up, and this is a growing up experience. Your help is better placed giving your cousin emotional support, and not trampling in his business in which you have zero standing. You have the potential to make things worse for your cousin. It's hard to see those we love suffer. But you are not an attorney, and you are neither a spouse nor a sponsor here. Steer your love for your cousin towards something like being a sympathetic sounding board for him to bounce ideas off of. Make suggestions, but don't run his life. Sometimes letting people mess up is an act of charity. Be charitable.

I was going to provide a supporting statement to the wife. The attorney knows who I am.