My Mother In Law Hates Me HELP!!! [merged threads]

[Kim and Joseph 36]

I'm planning My Final Transition to the USA in a few weeks. My Mother in Law Hate for me is getting more Real. I'm worried and afraid that when I arrive there I will be homeless. The Plan was to live with her until we save up enough, build good Credit and Get an apartment. My Husband don't have any Savings, he has one Job he is struggling with and trying to find another. My Mother in law don't want me at her House. We have never had a problem, no fight, arguments nothing. My Husband is White and I'm Black. My Husband has lived with his Mother all his Life, he's the only Child. My Social Security and Permanent Card will be going to her Address. I feel Lost. I booked My Flight a while ago but I don't want to tell my husband the date because I don't trust my Mother-in-Law but she keeps asking, My Mother in Law and Husband are the Sponsors on the Affidavit.

Nothing has Changed between my Husband and I, Just my Mother-in-Law Constant Nagging suddenly about me living with her and she don't want me at her house. It's Frustrating my Husband. She really dont want him to move out either, she's past Retirement age but she works and he's all she has. Who Experience this?

Edited December 5, 2020 by TBoneTX

[milimelo 4,538]

Come to the US, get a job, get an apartment and move out. The longer you prolong facing the issue the longer your anxiety will bear on you. As MIL is working, chances are you won’t even see her much and when you get a job even less. 

[Kim and Joseph 36]

I'm planning My Final Transition to the USA in a few weeks. My Mother in Law Hate for me is getting more Real. I'm worried and afraid that when I arrive there I will be homeless. The Plan was to live with her until we save up enough, build good Credit and Get an apartment. My Husband don't have any Savings, he has one Job he is struggling with and trying to find another. My Mother in law don't want me at her House. We have never had a problem, no fight, arguments nothing. My Husband is White and I'm Black. My Husband has lived with his Mother all his Life, he's the only Child. My Social Security and Permanent Card will be going to her Address. I feel Lost. I booked My Flight a while ago but I don't want to tell my husband the date because I don't trust my Mother-in-Law but she keeps asking, My Mother in Law and Husband are the Sponsors on the Affidavit.

Nothing has Changed between my Husband and I, Just my Mother-in-Law Constant Nagging suddenly about me living with her and she don't want me at her house. It's Frustrating my Husband. She really dont want him to move out either, she's past Retirement age but she works and he's all she has. Who Experience this? 

[H.Angy 51]

There are no jobs...

If things are bad right now between you and her, probably it will get worse.

 

Edited December 5, 2020 by H.Angy

[TBoneTX 45,841]

Duplicate threads from different forums have been merged.  Please open a new topic just once.

[JFH 12,191]

If she is the joint sponsor then I hardly think she actually hates you. That’s a huge commitment to make and it involves putting yourself in a position where you could potentially be sued by the government. It’s not something you do for someone you hate. She loves her son. So much so that she allows him to live with her and bring his wife into her home. That’s not the action of a person who hates you.
 

I think she hates the situation she finds herself in - and I can see why. Past retirement age but still working. Adult son living at home because he can’t get a job that pays enough to move out. Now the son is bringing his wife into the home. She had to sign a contract with the government and make a huge financial commitment so that her adult son can have his wife here. Yes, she’s very frustrated with the situation and rightly so. I don’t know how old you two are but if you are of the age where children are possible she may well be concerned that her son, who doesn’t even earn enough to support himself, is going to be adding not only a wife but also children to her household when she’s in her golden years and should be resting and relaxing. 
 

Have you started looking for and applying for jobs here? I got my job before I moved here. I applied by email and was interviewed over Skype and started working 2 weeks after I arrived. With an immigrant visa you will be a permanent resident the minute you land and can work immediately. The sooner you start working, the sooner you can move out of her house. She’s doing a lot for you, more than she has to. She doesn’t hate you. 
 

And please, don’t make this about race. Not every disagreement between people here is about race. I won’t deny that there are racial issues here in this country but if you come here with that attitude that everything is because of race you are in for a hard time. Her frustration with this situation has nothing to do with your skin. It has everything to do with two adults who should be standing on their own feet still depending on her for everything. I’d be angry too in that situation. 

Edited December 6, 2020 by JFH

[Boiler 45,897]

Why on earth would she sponsor you if this is the case?

[TBoneTX 45,841]

A noncontributory post has been removed.

[African Zealot 1,455]

Doesn’t make sense. Minimum three sides to every story.