Thread Ownership

[MichelleandCraig 1]

Well, we're all human, so we make mistakes. Personal information is, many times though not always, posted in anger. Whatever your response to that, refer again to the first sentence. (and I don't mean that in a "funny" way...) M.

ETA: posted in anger, or times of extreme distress of some sort, etc...

Edited June 26, 2007 by MichelleandCraig

[Sheriff Uling 3]

LisaD...

That's a very good question.

I would say that the OP would have to have some justification for wanting to close a thread they created and "IF" the merrits of closing the thread are warranted, then sure. Other than that, it becomes public domain at the discretion of the MODs and ultimately Capt Ewok. IMO...

Cheers!!!

Sheriff Uling

p.s. Not to mention other users may be actively involved in that thread/discussion and could be useful or entertaining for future members to jump on board...

[ChasUK 0]

I guess most of the time your example, Chas, might just be because someone changed his/her mind even if the conversation stayed rational.

In that instance, should the OP be able to decide if the thread gets locked? (Is that what you meant, Chas? Sorry if I'm off base...I was just trying to decide if that's what you meant..not trying to put words in your mouth.)

In that particular instance, my opinion would be yes....if it has to do with the OP's personal life, they should be able to shut it down for ANY reason. My opinion only.

Basically yes. I think my point about this is that in such a case, (convo stays rational), I think the OP would just leave it and not respond anymore. They would not feel any NEED to have the thread closed. Only if it got out of hand would they ask for that. Hence my opinion on the validity of Lisa's POV on the matter.

As it happens, despite my belief that an OP wouldn't bother to have a rational thread closed that was discussing things pertaining to them, if the discussion is about the OP, then the OP should have the right to calmly prevent it going further by asking for thread closure.

[MichelleandCraig 1]

Well yeah....I agree...and in the case of someone jumping the gun and posting personal stuff when they are angry, distressed, etc. (as has been done *many* a time and is often the reason for disclosure of personal info...) he/she may later regret posting it. Even if the convo stays rational...in retrospect one may not wanting people sitting around discussing their personal life...yanno? M.

ETA: Or, I guess we were talking about info where the topic has gone OFF topic...but in the cases with personal info, no matter *what* the thread is now about, I think it should be able to be closed so it can float down the page. The OP may not want newbies (or anyone) reading all that they're regretting posting.. *whew* (overexplained, I know...I do that a lot!)

Edited June 27, 2007 by MichelleandCraig

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Erm, ok.

Controlled vs. out of hand....hrmm...poster brings up personal life...in the out of hand issue, ppl discuss it, poo gets flung, the thread turns into a nightmare...poster regrets ever starting it.

controlled...poster brings up personal life, people discuss it in a rational manner, topic gets stale after a few days as most do...topic dies...no real impetus to make OP feel regret for starting it.

So that's why I asked for an example. I can't see how if it was in a controlled fashion, what would make the OP change his/her mind and request a lock.

Hmmm. But what about the supercillious sycophant? Sometimes poo flinging is disguised as something else, don't ya think, Lisa D?

[Mags 112]

Okay. We've just had a disastrous thread closed about five minutes ago, due to insults, insinuations and "poo flinging". PLease don't let this thread go down that route aswell.

Don't make me put my hat on. I have a headache and am feeling rather hot.

[Marilyn. 340]

Okay. We've just had a disastrous thread closed about five minutes ago, due to insults, insinuations and "poo flinging". PLease don't let this thread go down that route aswell.

Don't make me put my hat on. I have a headache and am feeling rather hot.

go lie down, young lady

Edited June 27, 2007 by MarilynP

[Mags 112]

Okay. We've just had a disastrous thread closed about five minutes ago, due to insults, insinuations and "poo flinging". PLease don't let this thread go down that route aswell.

Don't make me put my hat on. I have a headache and am feeling rather hot.

go lie down, young lady

Sorry, Marilyn!

Edited June 27, 2007 by mags

[SteveLaura 0]

I've seen it a lot lately. Even in this forum with the silly 'thanks for your understanding' thread & it made me scratch my head as to why that OP would request & get a lock for it.

I was bored with it. No one had added anything for a couple of days. I said in the thread that I might ask for it to be closed to see what phrase would be used. Then I did it. It was a thread I started purely for my own amusement, as is much of the stuff one can find here.

Altho I've been a member here for nearly three years, I still feel new to the whole forum thing. For the life of me I don't understand why people take these things so seriously.

[cheeky^Wolf 0]

Doesn't alot of it have to do with who started the thread?

If people have been rude or had run ins with others in the past and then post a "woe is me" topic, I think a lot of people will think "you know what, I don't really care". Should the non sympathetic shouldn't post anything in the thread? no. But they do. It's human nature.

I hate to use her as an example but HA is a prime one. In my opinion, she pissed a lot of people off on here, used her "you're on ignore" line way too many times. In Sept 06 she posted her "last post" which basically said screw you all, I'm outta here. Then comes back like nothing has happened and the cycle begins again. Now in June 07, we have yet another "last post" which was another screw you all, I'm outta here.

Some people can forgive and forget and are happy with the medical/mood/unhappy excuse. I, for one (and I know I'm not the only one) can't. If she's got bad luck then I'm going to be far less sympathetic to her than I am to others, for the simple fact that she has been nothing but a b!tch to me. What goes around comes around. If you dish out poo, you have to fully expect to get some thrown back in your face sometimes.

So, IMO, depending on the OP, the thread can be controlled or out of hand. Usually, the thread will get out of hand when the OP retaliates. Which can only make you wonder their reasoning for starting the thread in the first place and when the OP asks for a thread to be closed, is it an act of defeat or just drama?

[ChristinaM 0]

One also has to consider how appropriate a response is before posting it though. Yes, I know HA pizzed off a lot of people. However, is "GOOD, now go and suck my hairy balls!" an appropriate response to "My husband has just told me he's been lying to me for two years"? If I were HA, I would have asked for the thread to be closed also. I believe this forum has a function of support, which implies to me a banding together behind those who are in need - regardless of how they have treated you. If you don't feel able to do that, then don't - but don't poop all over a thread for it.

It's a question of maturity - as the OP, are you mature enough to handle the responses you get even if you don't like them all, and for the community as a whole, are we mature enough to know when it's better to hit the "Back" button than to put our six-eggs-worth in? One would like the answer to both questions to be yes, but sadly I don't think that's the case.

I post on a site where there is no moderation and no deleting of posts or comments unless they are in breach of federal law. You learn damn quick what it is and is not appropriate to say, what will get a certain set of responses. If you don't like it, tough sh*t. You've learnt your lesson, and you don't do it again. People behave differently when there is no "Mommy" to run to. Since the aim of this board is to help people through immigration issues, we can't simply allow people to ride roughshod over everybody else and a policy of "you said it, now deal with the consequences" is not as practical.

As for the original question, I agree with the thought that if it is a personal thread and it is out of control, by all means ask for it to be closed. If it's just wandered off topic, no biggie and it stays open (provided it hasn't turned into a bunch of monkeys flinging manure).

I don't generally weigh in on board/site admin policies, but I think the right of an OP to close a personal thread that has turned vicious should be something that we uphold as only being fair.