Fiancee issue

[Me88 0]

Good day everyone I have a fiancee and we’ve been talking for about 5 months now,  we have concern about his condition. He is a veteran and diagnosed with mental illness and schizophrenia. He opened to me everything about his conditions and accepted it. As we get to know him I could say that it’s way too far from what his condition in fact he’s a smart guy. The question is can we be denied in the petition if ever he apply for the k1 because of his condition? Thank you all.

[payxibka 10,047]

17 minutes ago, Me88 said:

Good day everyone I have a fiancee and we’ve been talking for about 5 months now,  we have concern about his condition. He is a veteran and diagnosed with mental illness and schizophrenia. He opened to me everything about his conditions and accepted it. As we get to know him I could say that it’s way too far from what his condition in fact he’s a smart guy. The question is can we be denied in the petition if ever he apply for the k1 because of his condition? Thank you all.

I assume "he" is the USC. 

 

No, this will have no effect.   The USCs medical condition is not evaluated 

Edited October 18, 2020 by payxibka

[SalishSea 18,095]

1 hour ago, Me88 said:

Good day everyone I have a fiancee and we’ve been talking for about 5 months now,  we have concern about his condition. He is a veteran and diagnosed with mental illness and schizophrenia. He opened to me everything about his conditions and accepted it. As we get to know him I could say that it’s way too far from what his condition in fact he’s a smart guy. The question is can we be denied in the petition if ever he apply for the k1 because of his condition? Thank you all.

Do you realize that you still will be required to meet in person before he can petition you?

[Me88 0]

5 minutes ago, Jorgedig said:

Do you realize that you still will be required to meet in person before he can petition you?

Yes we are aware of it, we are just waiting for the travel to be lifted.

1 hour ago, payxibka said:

I assume "he" is the USC. 

 

No, this will have no effect.   The USCs medical condition is not evaluated 

Thank you

[Blkbam 39]

One thing to keep in mind for the future for both of your sakes is to ensure that you have the proper power of attorney established prior to and in case he requires hospitalization. Also if he is hospitalized, he will be unable to enter into certain legal contracts should they specify that he be under sound mind and body until he is released.

[Me88 0]

5 minutes ago, Blkbam said:

One thing to keep in mind for the future for both of your sakes is to ensure that you have the proper power of attorney established prior to and in case he requires hospitalization. Also if he is hospitalized, he will be unable to enter into certain legal contracts should they specify that he be under sound mind and body until he is released.

Thank you but he is totally ok

[Blkbam 39]

2 minutes ago, Me88 said:

Thank you but he is totally ok

Your never totally ok, it's a constant battle and only external observation can determine how well someone is.

 

Take it from someone who has dealt with schizophrenia, there will come a day when they are not ok. When it comes it will be really painful but if you prepare property it will make a huge difference. Learn as much as you can about the condition and those supporting people with the condition and then learn some more.

 

I don''t say this to affect your relationship. I say this because if someone had said this to me I would have been in a better place to provide support for my partner when that time came

[Me88 0]

1 hour ago, Blkbam said:

Your never totally ok, it's a constant battle and only external observation can determine how well someone is.

 

Take it from someone who has dealt with schizophrenia, there will come a day when they are not ok. When it comes it will be really painful but if you prepare property it will make a huge difference. Learn as much as you can about the condition and those supporting people with the condition and then learn some more.

 

I don''t say this to affect your relationship. I say this because if someone had said this to me I would have been in a better place to provide support for my partner when that time came

To be honest I was scared when he told me his condition, I made a research about his health issues and i’ve learned that he needs attention and care. Yes there were times that it’s hard to dealt with him because of how sensitive he is but I Truly understand him, i really need advice about this matter coz i keep thinking about our relationship. 

[Chancy 6,243]

1 hour ago, Me88 said:

To be honest I was scared when he told me his condition, I made a research about his health issues and i’ve learned that he needs attention and care. Yes there were times that it’s hard to dealt with him because of how sensitive he is but I Truly understand him, i really need advice about this matter coz i keep thinking about our relationship. 

 

Only you can judge how much you are capable of accepting.  But you getting engaged to someone and saying that he's totally ok and that you truly understand him just from having interacted online and not in person, tells me that you are seriously underestimating mental illness (and also, marriage).  As a fellow Filipino, I understand why you might think this way as mental health is not something we openly talk about in the PH.

 

So please do continue your research and self-reflection.  I also urge you not to commit to the K1 process until you've spent a lot of time in person, not just through video calls, with your loved one.  One short visit will not be enough to understand what you could be dealing with for the rest of your life.  Ask yourself -- when you are stuck together in the same house and there is no app that you can just switch off so you don't have to deal with his "sensitivity" all day, can you live your life that way?  Please remember that it's not just your immigration at stake here.

 

Good luck and best wishes to you both.

 

[Adventine 3,207]

1 hour ago, Me88 said:

To be honest I was scared when he told me his condition, I made a research about his health issues and i’ve learned that he needs attention and care. Yes there were times that it’s hard to dealt with him because of how sensitive he is but I Truly understand him, i really need advice about this matter coz i keep thinking about our relationship. 

Another Filipino here, also going through the K1 process.

 

Mental illness can be a lifelong condition but if your partner seeks appropriate treatment and care, you can have a healthy, loving relationship.

 

Please don't rush into things and spend as much in person time with your fiancé as you possibly can. Online interaction, or even short visits, are completely different from day to day life.

 

Get to know him, his personality, what he does when he's stressed and when things don't go his way. 

 

Hope it goes well for you!

[Allovertheworld 355]

6 hours ago, Me88 said:

Good day everyone I have a fiancee and we’ve been talking for about 5 months now,  we have concern about his condition. He is a veteran and diagnosed with mental illness and schizophrenia. He opened to me everything about his conditions and accepted it. As we get to know him I could say that it’s way too far from what his condition in fact he’s a smart guy. The question is can we be denied in the petition if ever he apply for the k1 because of his condition? Thank you all.

For a K1 it's all about your and your health.

 

When and if you go do your Medical Exam in Manila, if you have ever been married before, had an abortion, or have some scars on your wrist then you will more than likely have to do secondary Psychological exam 

[SunflowerSweet 1,321]

8 hours ago, Me88 said:

Good day everyone I have a fiancee and we’ve been talking for about 5 months now,  we have concern about his condition. He is a veteran and diagnosed with mental illness and schizophrenia. He opened to me everything about his conditions and accepted it. As we get to know him I could say that it’s way too far from what his condition in fact he’s a smart guy. The question is can we be denied in the petition if ever he apply for the k1 because of his condition? Thank you all.

The process is much more focused on you, the beneficiary, so it should not be an issue on a technical level.

 

I just want to say that you can be mentally ill AND smart. And kind. And many other positive things.
 

I encourage you to do more research and get to know him because it sounds like you have the idea that by talking to him remotely over 5 months, you somehow know better than the professionals who he received his diagnosis from. Just because he’s a smart guy doesn’t mean he isn’t also schizophrenic.

[Orangesapples 1,954]

4 hours ago, Allovertheworld said:

For a K1 it's all about your and your health.

 

When and if you go do your Medical Exam in Manila, if you have ever been married before, had an abortion, or have some scars on your wrist then you will more than likely have to do secondary Psychological exam 

For an abortion?? What?? I was never asked anything like that but I'm not from the Phillipines. Is it legal to ask different medical questions in different countries? That's horrible. 

 

OP, schizophrenia is no joke. It can be manageable and it can even go into remission for many years but it's a very tough illness to deal with. Make sure you go into this prepared. Of course, people with schizophrenia can be wonderful people and it's great he didn't hide it from you. Just keep in mind that most the positive and the negative symptoms can be challenging. 

[JeanneAdil 6,610]

The concerns here with the VJ community are more for you than the USC

and for good reasons

You researched but do you know there are 5 classes of schizophrenia and how much do you know about him?

Is he working?

Is he on disability?

Has he already had to sign a POA (power of attorney ) to another for his care?

 

If on disbility the following applies for income support for spouse visa and i would assume also for the K1 you would seek (not a I 184 in your case but a I 134)

Yes, disabled person can marry non-US citizen. The SSI does not disqualify the disabled person for being a sponsor, however that income cannot be used on the I864, Affidavit of Support. 

 

He has to show he can sponsor you with his income and be able to buy health care insurance for you till your AOS is complete

 

 

What are the 5 types of schizophrenia?

The previous version, the DSM-IV, described the following five types of schizophrenia:

• paranoid type.
• disorganized type.
• catatonic type.
• undifferentiated type.
• residual type.

Oct 6, 2020

Also, a person can have both schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, which can complicate diagnosis. Some people have schizoaffective disorder, which involves a combination of schizophrenia symptoms and those of a mood disorder.    

and if also bipolar ,   he is subject to mania and depression .  you have talked 5 months now /  he may be in a mania zone meaning he is in  period of great excitement or euphoria, delusions, and overactivity. periods of great excitement or euphoria, delusions, and overactivity and seems ok.

[carmel34 3,650]

Mental illness can ruin even the best of relationships, so take it slow, spend as much time as you can in person with your boyfriend, to find what he is really like in a daily routine, see how he reacts to stressful situations, know everything about him, including past relationships, medical condition, treatment, and long-term implications such as you caring for him full-time if it comes to that.  There could be significant financial challenges too.  This is one of those cases where an abundance of caution is recommended, for your own protection and future happiness.  I hope it works out for the two of you, and good luck with the K-1 process if you choose to proceed!