Proving a bona fide marriage when living apart?

[frodolives 7]

My boyfriend and I have been discussing getting married by the end of the year (COVID permitting). He was supposed to visit for three months this summer but that fell through with all the travel bans. We have carried on a long distance relationship for three years, and have met once before, briefly. Currently, we’ve been seriously exploring the idea of me visiting in October and living together for a couple of months. In this time, we would get married. After returning to the States, I would then begin the spousal visa process.

 

The more I read, the more I am becoming concerned about how we can prove a bona fide marriage. Both of us are in our mid twenties, and students; I have actually taken a leave of absence this semester just so I could go stay with him for 2-3 months to get some extra time together. 
 

How do you prove a legitimate marriage when you have limited evidence and are not living with your spouse? 
 

The evidence I would have would be:

 

-Photographs from our time living together for a few months

-The apartment lease with both our names when I visit him

-Wedding photos with a couple of my family members and a couple of his family members (it’s a small wedding; not everyone is willing to travel right now)

-An extensive chat log showing our relationship over the last three years

-Receipts from gifts sent to each other
-Certificate of a Catholic marriage preparation program we will need to complete before the wedding

 

That’s all we would have thus far. If I opened a joint account after our wedding, would that be helpful as well? My other concern, is that given how we are planning the wedding before having lived together for some time, would that be a red flag to the USCIS? For example, we will be completing the wedding preparation now (because planning a Catholic wedding can take some time, and we want to be as prepared as we can), so I am worried that upon seeing the dates, the UCSIS might wonder why we decided on marriage so soon. Our circumstances are extremely difficult with school, and now the unpredictability of COVID. 

 

My dad is also very much involved in this process and has said that he would be willing to send in a letter, attesting to the legitimacy of our relationship and our plans for the future together. We have some other family and friends who would be willing to do the same.

 

Is this enough? I have been extremely anxious about this whole thing, because I know that our relationship is true, but I am afraid that there won’t be enough evidence to reflect that given our circumstances and limited ability to meet. Thanks. 

Edited August 21, 2020 by frodolives

[Lucky2Lucky 2,526]

Please add the country to your VJ profile as this can play a significant role in what is needed. A joint bank account would be great but it should be used-not just created for show. Additionally, from the time you submit the petition to the time of your interview you two may gather additional evidence. I wouldn’t stress too much as you seem to be thinking the correct things however this depends on the country.

[frodolives 7]

Just now, Luckycuds said:

Please add the country to your VJ profile as this can play a significant role in what is needed. A joint bank account would be great but it should be used-not just created for show. Additionally, from the time you submit the petition to the time of your interview you two may gather additional evidence. I wouldn’t stress too much as you seem to be thinking the correct things however this depends on the country.

He’s from Russia. We want to marry in Italy (My family still has relatives living in Sicily and we want a wedding in the church my great grandparents were married in - again, COVID permitting). Thank you for your response though! I feel better that I have additional time to gather info. That’s a positive!

[Crazy Cat 41,884]

Evidence of a bona fide marriage starts after the marriage....not before.  The best evidence you can provide is that of being together until you can live together.  Once you are living together, you can start gathering legal documents, etc.

[frodolives 7]

16 minutes ago, Lucky Cat said:

Evidence of a bona fide marriage starts after the marriage....not before.  The best evidence you can provide is that of being together until you can live together.  Once you are living together, you can start gathering legal documents, etc.

This is where I’ve been quite confused...I thought we wouldn’t be able to live together until the process has been completed? At what point does he come over to live with me? Also, being that we are students, and I will also be working (because I know the financial aspects are also very important), how frequently would they expect us to visit? Would visiting a weekend at a time every few months suffice? 

[frodolives 7]

11 minutes ago, frodolives said:

This is where I’ve been quite confused...I thought we wouldn’t be able to live together until the process has been completed? At what point does he come over to live with me? Also, being that we are students, and I will also be working (because I know the financial aspects are also very important), how frequently would they expect us to visit? Would visiting a weekend at a time every few months suffice? 

Also, I thought that the I-130, which to my understanding is the first form I submit, was the form with which I would need to show further evidence? So if there’s not enough right at that point, wouldn’t it be denied before I could gather more evidence over time before the green card interview? What if they suspect marriage fraud because we got married so quickly without having much time spent together in person? I’m a highly anxious person so maybe I’m just over worrying lol

[Crazy Cat 41,884]

6 minutes ago, frodolives said:

This is where I’ve been quite confused...I thought we wouldn’t be able to live together until the process has been completed? At what point does he come over to live with me? Also, being that we are students, and I will also be working (because I know the financial aspects are also very important), how frequently would they expect us to visit? Would visiting a weekend at a time every few months suffice? 

When married spouses are living in separate countries after marriage, the best evidence you can provide is evidence of the time you are actually together and continued communication.  Married couples who live in separate countries are not expected to have joint bank accounts or joint property.  The legal documents generated after living together (joint finances, leases, etc.) can then be used when removing conditions on a conditional green card 2 years later.   

[frodolives 7]

44 minutes ago, Lucky Cat said:

When married spouses are living in separate countries after marriage, the best evidence you can provide is evidence of the time you are actually together and continued communication.  Married couples who live in separate countries are not expected to have joint bank accounts or joint property.  The legal documents generated after living together (joint finances, leases, etc.) can then be used when removing conditions on a conditional green card 2 years later.   

With the  I-130, which to my understanding is the first form I submit, was the form with which I would need to show further evidence? So if there’s not enough right at that point, wouldn’t it be denied before I could gather more evidence over time before the green card interview? What if they suspect marriage fraud because we got married so quickly withouthaving much time spent together in person? I’m a highly anxious person so maybe I’m just over worrying . Lol

 

[pushbrk 12,892]

1 hour ago, frodolives said:

With the  I-130, which to my understanding is the first form I submit, was the form with which I would need to show further evidence? So if there’s not enough right at that point, wouldn’t it be denied before I could gather more evidence over time before the green card interview? What if they suspect marriage fraud because we got married so quickly withouthaving much time spent together in person? I’m a highly anxious person so maybe I’m just over worrying . Lol

 

Sounds like you've had multiple visits and weeks together in the past.  You'll have a couple months more together before you file.  That's plenty.  Lots of members here with one or two visits of one or two weeks, prior to marriage and filing.  Don't overthink this.  Passport stamps and boarding passes are the primary evidence of time spent together.  Photos are important but secondary.  Nothing more is expected of couples trying to unite after long distance relationships.

 

The term "evidence of a bona fide marriage" when explained, refers to a bona fide relationship.  That certainly does include relationship evidence from BEFORE marriage.  Think of bona fide relationship instead of bona fide marriage and you'll be on a better track.

Edited August 22, 2020 by pushbrk

[millefleur 5,046]

Most newlyweds who file the I-130 are in this exact situation regarding not having a lot of evidence. If you will apply when recently married, all wedding related things help. Receipts for any services/clothing you purchase for the wedding, cards from family/friends, photos from the wedding, literally anything wedding related counts as evidence. My husband and I included receipts for wedding rings, the car we rented, photography contract, flowers receipt, plane tickets from family members/friends who visited for the purpose of our wedding, etc. Submit all evidence relating to honeymoon/wedding related travel - take tons of pictures during that time of you two alone, showing the place where you are. Even if it's just a cheesy selfie with some random building in the background, you can write a description below of where and when it was taken. Also, photos with family/friends are hugely important. Show that your family and friends all know each other, write descriptions explaining who is who in the photos.

 

1 hour ago, frodolives said:

What if they suspect marriage fraud because we got married so quickly withouthaving much time spent together in person?

Russia isn't considered a high fraud country when it comes to spousal visas. Moscow doesn't see that many CR-1/IR-1 visas, so if you went to all the trouble to get married in a 3rd country, it's already looking quite legit. Overwhelming majority of relationship based visas in Moscow are K-1 fiance visas.

 

If you're planning to get married in Italy or anywhere else, you need to submit the official wedding certificate from the country (the civil document), as any kind of church certificate wouldn't suffice as proof. You can write a cover letter explaining that you are both Catholic and that's why you also did a church wedding, though, and include that as additional proof. Usually having the same religion/values strengthens one's case.

[SteveInBostonI130 3,454]

3 hours ago, frodolives said:

This is where I’ve been quite confused...I thought we wouldn’t be able to live together until the process has been completed? At what point does he come over to live with me? Also, being that we are students, and I will also be working (because I know the financial aspects are also very important), how frequently would they expect us to visit? Would visiting a weekend at a time every few months suffice? 

A weekend every few months?

 

Unless you get a direct flight from JFK to SVO, fight time would be almost a full day.  That is if he lives in Moscow or St Petersburg.  Perhaps two days travel if he lives further East, or away from one of the major cities.  Perhaps visit for a week or two every few months?

 

You said you met only once, briefly, in the past 3 years?  I would suggest you go ahead with your plan and visit him for 2-3 months and see how well you get along first.  Then, if things are going well, marry.  Or go for K-1.

 

I suggest K-1 here because that will give you two a second chance to live together for a while, this time in the US.  That will give you more time together to evaluate your relationship, and he can see if US life is for him. 

 

This site is focused on visa and immigration, but a key aspect for CR1/IR1 people seem to overlook or take for a given is the actual marriage.  Instead of worrying about what evidence to collect to prove a bona fide relationship, take the first step of having a bona fide relationship.  Then start gathering evidence of that, provided, hopefully, things go very well.

 

There is no magic "x" that will pass USCIS and interview requirements.  The quality of the evidence is more important than quantity.  You doing things as a couple and documenting that will naturally lead to the evidence you need versus pre-planning for immigration evidence, which can come across as manufactured.

 

  

[JFH 12,190]

You are definitely over-thinking this. Every day hundreds of spouses are granted immigrant visas (when embassies are working at normal capacity) without ever having lived together. We are one such couple. Prior to immigrating here we had never spent more than 2 weeks together (and the two-week visit was a one-off, all other visits were just 4 or 5 days), had never lived together, had no joint finances or property. The only thing remotely connected to joint finances we had was he was listed as the sole beneficiary on my company life insurance policy and we drew up simple wills - this is something you should consider doing anyway, immigration notwithstanding, you are never too young to have a will. 
 

You can’t send what you don’t have so focus on what you do have. Evidence of your time spent together is key. 

[JeanneAdil 6,510]

Your marriage certificate

your boarding passes showing in the same country to marry

just a few photos of marriage

 

and since you intend to marry in 2020,  fill out the W7 for ITIN to file joint taxes in the spring.  you can also file married separate

not many are able to actually live together when going thru this process since he can't come to the US till CR1 is granted and  the USC usually has commitments in the states

 

[SalishSea 17,833]

19 hours ago, frodolives said:

My dad is also very much involved in this process and has said that he would be willing to send in a letter, attesting to the legitimacy of our relationship and our plans for the future together. We have some other family and friends who would be willing to do the same.

Not necessary or helpful in this case.

 

OP, you will also want to explore the financial requirements for sponsoring him, as well as the domicile requirements.

[TenderHearted 39]

19 hours ago, pushbrk said:

Sounds like you've had multiple visits and weeks together in the past.  You'll have a couple months more together before you file.  That's plenty.  Lots of members here with one or two visits of one or two weeks, prior to marriage and filing.  Don't overthink this.  Passport stamps and boarding passes are the primary evidence of time spent together.  Photos are important but secondary.  Nothing more is expected of couples trying to unite after long distance relationships.

 

The term "evidence of a bona fide marriage" when explained, refers to a bona fide relationship.  That certainly does include relationship evidence from BEFORE marriage.  Think of bona fide relationship instead of bona fide marriage and you'll be on a better track.

Great explanation, and that gives me renewed hope for the future, when me and my fiance finally get married and then file the CR-1. Thank you pushbrk!