UK posts being made invisible

[LaL 418]

I still struggle what to see what was so controversial about the original thread (where everyone was universally sympathetic) from yesterday until this:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&p=999240

I don't see any "rubbing salt in wounds" from Bex posts. I think the "outrageous behavoir" began there. I see NO ONE taking any kind of satisfaction from the OP's predicament.

I don't disagree with you, and the behavior was dealt with at the time.

I still struggle what to see what was so controversial about the original thread (where everyone was universally sympathetic) from yesterday until this:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&p=999240

I don't see any "rubbing salt in wounds" from Bex posts. I think the "outrageous behavoir" began there. I see NO ONE taking any kind of satisfaction from the OP's predicament.

and it was allowed to continue & escalate instead of a mod jumping in & saying chill. It is a public message board, if you ask someone to bow out, you better believe you're going to get flak. Hence the reason many of us, myself included, choose not to air our dirty laundry in public.

Just a correction - I did request people stop bickering.

True. And I'd like to know why last week a whole thread was made invisible & locked. Why? Why not keep it up so others can see how it went? I've never seen another one invisible except for an AW thread...

I believe I already explained why the thread was made invisible. I locked the thread when it was out of control, and left it visible for an hour to allow the "dust to settle" and so members could see it was a closed topic. It served no purpose other than to show continued bickering.

Edited June 22, 2007 by lal_brandow

[Dr_LHA 3]

Aside from the fact that a board of this size with no member mods (even if all they ever did was to say 'please tone it down') is a train wreck.

A "please tone it down of I'm going to lock this thread" works wonders in my experience. Deleting posts leads to people getting angry and the thread descending into chaos. At least, this is my experience.

[Captain Ewok 1,891]

Which is better - no moderation at all, which has gotten the board where it is now - or mods?

And were exactly is VJ without mods? Personally I think it was better around here before posts started magically dissappearing. The main basis for VJ is for supporting people through visa and AOS application, and if you look at those forums they execute extremely well. I don't know how experienced the current mods are at their jobs, but I can't help but feel that the mod power has gone to the heads of some of our new mods and its spoiling things around here.

This is of course IMHO, but I still believe the correct way to deal with a bad thread is to lock it.

This is just my opinion, but without mods, you'd report an issue and it wouldn't be addressed until hours later (which was often too late). At least now, you can almost bet that one of the three mods will be online at any given time and PM them for something to be looked at.

Sometimes all that is needed is a 'nudge' in the thread from one of them - much better than a thread escalating to the point of no return before it gets reviewed.

Aside from the fact that a board of this size with no member mods (even if all they ever did was to say 'please tone it down') is a train wreck.

There are always going to be examples where you don't agree with a moderator's decision. And perhaps this incident will be something for them to learn from. Even at that, they're never going to be perfect.

Edited to say : I personally disagreed with the decision to 'invisiblize' ( that word!) the 'split' thread earlier in the week, so I PMd a mod and said so. Maybe my comments will be in their mind the next time they consider doing the same thing.

I agree and I want to thank the mods for the help that they do give. It will not be perfect but without them it would certainly be less good. As it was said if it were just me I sometimes have huge delays in addressing things -- often after the tipping point when things have exploded.

That said I think suggestions are a good thing always .

[TracyTN 237]

Aside from the fact that a board of this size with no member mods (even if all they ever did was to say 'please tone it down') is a train wreck.

A "please tone it down of I'm going to lock this thread" works wonders in my experience. Deleting posts leads to people getting angry and the thread descending into chaos. At least, this is my experience.

Agreed. But I'd still rather have someone around who can say that with some authority than have Joe Q Member say it and be ridiculed for suggesting it.

[Mags 112]

Aside from the fact that a board of this size with no member mods (even if all they ever did was to say 'please tone it down') is a train wreck.

A "please tone it down of I'm going to lock this thread" works wonders in my experience. Deleting posts leads to people getting angry and the thread descending into chaos. At least, this is my experience.

I do that aswell, as do the other mods here. Sometimes though a post is just too nasty or inflammatory to leave visible. You can't warn someone if they have already made the post!

A member doing something similar tends to start an argument with others, in my experience.

Edited June 22, 2007 by mags

[Sinergy 3]

I just read the thread, i was away from my desk so long i missed it. HA was out of line, weather her husband left her or not, ppl were there supporting her, no one gave one harsh word to her. However she was doing the flaming that I saw, since yea some posts were put invisible. Becca, Kez and Dev were only being supportive, however HA didnt want their support i guess and lashed out at them. And she did break TOC's, weather we are going thru a hard time or not, TOC's should apply for the person hurting and for the ppl who are supporting, there should be no exceptions.

Edited June 22, 2007 by Ionescu

[no name 1]

Just a correction - I did request people stop bickering.

An hour & half later, which as we know, is often too late in controversial threads.....

I believe I already explained why the thread was made invisible. I locked the thread when I was out of control, and left it visible for an hour to allow the "dust to settle" and so members could see it was a closed topic. It served no purpose other than to show continued bickering.

Then by those standards, this thread should have been locked down. It doesn;t make any sense. There has been one other post in

my experience that was hidden. That seems unfair.

[Dr_LHA 3]

Aside from the fact that a board of this size with no member mods (even if all they ever did was to say 'please tone it down') is a train wreck.

A "please tone it down of I'm going to lock this thread" works wonders in my experience. Deleting posts leads to people getting angry and the thread descending into chaos. At least, this is my experience.

Agreed. But I'd still rather have someone around who can say that with some authority than have Joe Q Member say it and be ridiculed for suggesting it.

Yes, and this is what mods are for. I guess my priorities are opposite to some of the mods here. I consider deleting a post to be a last resort which would only be invoked if the presence of that post continued to cause problems even after a thread was locked. For example a post containing hate speech, racism, illegal material etc.

[Captain Ewok 1,891]

I just read the thread, i was away from my desk so long i missed it. HA was out of line, weather her husband left her or not, ppl were there supporting her, no one gave one harsh word to her. However she was doing the flaming that I saw, since yea some posts were put invisible. Becca, Kez and Dev were only being supportive, however HA didnt want their support i guess and lashed out at them. And she did break TOC's, weather we are going thru a hard time or not, TOC's should apply for the person hurting as for the ppl who are supporting.

She was warned and clearly lets say for example if sometime later today she broke the TOS she would get moderated. I personally think a littlle slack was warranted at the time given her situation however from now on since the "warning is out" there is no slack left to give.

[Dr_LHA 3]

A member doing something similar tends to start an argument with others, in my experience.

Absolutely.

[TimsDaisy 0]

I still struggle what to see what was so controversial about the original thread (where everyone was universally sympathetic) from yesterday until this:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&p=999240

I don't see any "rubbing salt in wounds" from Bex posts. I think the "outrageous behavoir" began there. I see NO ONE taking any kind of satisfaction from the OP's predicament.

I'm going to try to present how I think H_A read the posts in question WITHOUT making it seem like I'm attacking anyone. It's my sincere desire NOT to attack anyone, but rather to highlight where I think the breakdown occured (and yes, when it occured, I read the post like I think H_A did, I'm not going to pretend like I wasn't there for that):

The part that made H_A react strongly to rebeccajo came after rebeccajo agreed with another member's post that attempted to argue that there are two sides to every story (ie: we should give H_A's hubby the benefit of the doubt:

I think Helen said things very well - and she really is right you know. We don't know both sides of the story. We can still offer support to HA without feeding HA's anger. I believe as a mature woman and a thorough thinker she will be able to accept that.

I think H_A is far from ready to vent about two-sides of the story as she's dealing with her pain from her side of the story. So I think she was probably smarting from the comment that rebeccajo was replying to (indirectly) even more than rebeccajo's comment. But where H_A became more angry was from the idea that her anger itself was somehow unwarranted or should be moderated. I think she was bothered by the notion that saying "hang 'em high" or whatever about the guy who just left her was "feeding HA's anger." And because she was so angry and hurting, she read the last sentence as a slight.

Rebeccajo's position is clearly that she did not mean it as a slight - she meant it to try to preserve peace and because she felt it was the right advice to give (not trying to put words in your mouth or intent in your mind rebeccajo, but this is what I gather you meant to do from your and other people's comment).

Because there is a lengthy history between H_A, RJ, and between a bunch of us here, we all reacted in very short order, applying the meaning we were predisposed to apply and take the sides we were predisposed to apply. We all got protective of our friends, and a sh*t storm began.

I hope you'll all believe me when I say that I've written all this not to say "there for RJ is wrong and H_A is right," nor to say "H_A is wrong and RJ is right," but rather to say that I think THE WHOLE COMMUNITY would be better if we all slowed the hell down and actually read what was on the page a few times and tried to see how another party could take things in the wrong way. ESPECIALLY if we consider the party's state of mind at that time.

I'm not sure we can really get past perceived or real insults, slights, hurts, and misunderstandings at this point. But at the very least, perhaps now we can decide to hold our hands every once in awhile and just let it go.

[TracyTN 237]

Yes, and this is what mods are for. I guess my priorities are opposite to some of the mods here. I consider deleting a post to be a last resort which would only be invoked if the presence of that post continued to cause problems even after a thread was locked. For example a post containing hate speech, racism, illegal material etc.

I completely understand where you're coming from.

[Captain Ewok 1,891]

How about this everyone. Lets focus on the future and on suggestions for what you think is "fair" in your opinion given various situations. A constructive discussion on this will be valuable. I am sure that we can come up with some good suggestions to "meld" into the moderation style .

[Sinergy 3]

I just read the thread, i was away from my desk so long i missed it. HA was out of line, weather her husband left her or not, ppl were there supporting her, no one gave one harsh word to her. However she was doing the flaming that I saw, since yea some posts were put invisible. Becca, Kez and Dev were only being supportive, however HA didnt want their support i guess and lashed out at them. And she did break TOC's, weather we are going thru a hard time or not, TOC's should apply for the person hurting as for the ppl who are supporting.

She was warned and clearly lets say for example if sometime later today she broke the TOS she would get moderated. I personally think a littlle slack was warranted at the time given her situation however from now on since the "warning is out" there is no slack left to give.

I agree, but i also think HA took this opportunity to flame at becca and kez. It is a horrible situation she is going thru, however, now everyone will be cautious when supporting someone in a situation like thing bc no matter what, theres always some kind of war in the thread.

[SteveLaura 0]

As far as I've seen, VJ has always had its fair share of posters who feel that all threads are about them. And if they're not, they find a way to make it so. The "Look at me, I'm being outrageous again!" crowd. Personally I get enough drama from real life to go look for it in a virtual world. I don't know how you moderate for those people. Ignore 'em, I s'pose.

I like the mods. They have cool hats.