Argentinians in the U.S. - Emotional Support Group

[Fe.Ta 874]

Hello!

I found this area in VJ where we can have an off topic discussion.  Since we wanted some sort of emotional support group, maybe we can use this thread to just talk about Argentinians in the USA and how they (and those of us married to them) are dealing with today's immigration process, moving to a new country, and handling life in general.

 

Thanks!

Edited July 14, 2020 by Fe.Ta
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[Fer Schvarztman 217]

I think it's a great idea! This can also help the applicants that are still in Argentina going through the embassy stage. It's a good way to see what kind of personal and emotional challenges they will go through alone and with their future spouse since they arrive to the US.

 

It will also be nice to hear how Argentinians are dealing with the K1 process overseas and how AOS fillers can help because they have already passed that stage in the journey.

 

Learning from everyone can also help us deal with what we are all experiencing. Different points of view also help to find opportunities where we may only see trouble and difficulty. 

 

I'm in 😊

 

 

Edited July 14, 2020 by Fer Schvarztman

[TBoneTX 45,288]

Thread is moved from Off Topic to the "Moving to the US" forum, which has higher visibility and seems appropriate for this topic.

[Fe.Ta 874]

6 minutes ago, Fer Schvarztman said:

I think it's a great idea! This can also help the applicants that are still in Argentina going through the embassy stage. It's a good way to see what kind of personal and emotional challenges they will go through alone and with their future spouse since they arrive to the US.

 

It will also be nice to hear how Argentinians are dealing with the K1 process overseas and how AOS fillers can help because they have already passed that stage in the journey.

 

Learning from everyone can also help us deal with what we are all experiencing. Different points of view also help to find opportunities where we may only see trouble and difficulty. 

 

I'm in 😊

 

 

So true!

 

I also think it would be helpful for significant others and spouses to learn how to be of support for those moving, besides the obvious.  I know one of the first things I tried to get for my husband when we arrived was to find out where I could get yerba mate for him.  Slowly, we have been able to find other things like chorizo, etc. that remind him of home.  I try to be as aware as possible so I can support him emotionally.  Also, my family and I constantly show him love and support but I also let him have his nostalgic moments.  I have told him plenty of times that I completely understand that he will be sadden and miss hims family and friends, since those are other parts of his life that he needs.  So, as much as I can, I encourage him to remain engaged with them and keep those connections with friends.  We always make it a point to include his family in everything we do, even if it means someone else is holding the phone for the entire time so they feel they are part of what we are celebrating and what not.

One thing I would like to share with others is to take it one day at time when it comes to marriage.  Not only are we newlyweds but we also facing immigration AND moving from long distance to living together.  I feel so lucky that my husband and I can be aware of that and give each other grace and cut each other some slack because of it.  We don't use it as an excuse not to hold each other accountable, but I think it helps with not putting a lot of pressure or expectations all at once on one another as we navigate it all.

[WickedWorld 5]

Hey Guys! My fiancee just made it to the U.S. last week on a K1 visa. We were trying to do the SSN, but all offices are closed here in NJ.

Does anyone knows if the offices are open in NY?

 

[Andresr 47]

This post is a great idea ! I’m at nvc stage for y 2 minors sons ,I hope when they start school they will adapt quickly,

[Fe.Ta 874]

15 hours ago, WickedWorld said:

Hey Guys! My fiancee just made it to the U.S. last week on a K1 visa. We were trying to do the SSN, but all offices are closed here in NJ.

Does anyone knows if the offices are open in NY?

 

Hello!  Could you please follow and post the question in this thread:
 

 

We are trying to keep the threads separate (paperwork related versus emotional support).

 

Thanks!

[Fe.Ta 874]

7 hours ago, Andresr said:

This post is a great idea ! I’m at nvc stage for y 2 minors sons ,I hope when they start school they will adapt quickly,

Thank you!  Welcome!  You are in Miami, Florida, that is one of the places where there are a lot of Hispanics and it is not as intimidating (we live in Orlando, Florida).  But, just stay in tune.  I would advise you to connect with their teachers.  There are teachers that communicate a lot with parents when it comes to homework or any struggles they see.  Just FYI.

[juancarlos 126]

I am not Argentinian, I am from Spain but I just wanted to say hi!!

 

Ánimo a todos y espero poder visitar pronto vuestro país, tengo muy buenos amigos argentinos.

 

Saludos

[Fe.Ta 874]

42 minutes ago, juancarlos said:

I am not Argentinian, I am from Spain but I just wanted to say hi!!

 

Ánimo a todos y espero poder visitar pronto vuestro país, tengo muy buenos amigos argentinos.

 

Saludos

Hi!  Thank you!

[andyazcu 230]

This thread is great! I think a lot about how stressful and emotionally draining immigration is for my husband, not to mention also being in a pandemic. 

 

It's been hard for us because he came here intending to transfer his job from BA to NYC and then lost it due to covid. Waiting months for the EAD has been extremely stressful and applying to jobs without it and explaining the situation as a K1 immigrant has been even harder. With quarantine we can't do most of the things we love as a couple (shopping, movies, bars, date nights), so that's an added obstacle -- finding ways to have quality time inside a small apartment that doesn't get boring or feel routine. I think a lot of us have really been thrown a curveball and are just trying to navigate it the best we can.

 

Mostly I just try to put myself in his shoes. I'll never be able to 100% understand how it feels to be far away from family, trying to learn and adjust to a new country/language, and find a job amidst the largest unemployment period in history.

 

All we can really do is be supportive and strong for each other. One day at a time is the best advice. And also focus on the small moments like sharing a mate in the morning, FaceTime with family and friends, making a picada on Friday nights, things that help remind us why we're on this crazy adventure in the first place. We have great days, okay days, and some very bad ones too but the most important thing to remember is we are together, not separated by 5,000 miles anymore. That's what's grounded us through everything.

[Fe.Ta 874]

2 hours ago, andyazcu said:

This thread is great! I think a lot about how stressful and emotionally draining immigration is for my husband, not to mention also being in a pandemic. 

 

It's been hard for us because he came here intending to transfer his job from BA to NYC and then lost it due to covid. Waiting months for the EAD has been extremely stressful and applying to jobs without it and explaining the situation as a K1 immigrant has been even harder. With quarantine we can't do most of the things we love as a couple (shopping, movies, bars, date nights), so that's an added obstacle -- finding ways to have quality time inside a small apartment that doesn't get boring or feel routine. I think a lot of us have really been thrown a curveball and are just trying to navigate it the best we can.

 

Mostly I just try to put myself in his shoes. I'll never be able to 100% understand how it feels to be far away from family, trying to learn and adjust to a new country/language, and find a job amidst the largest unemployment period in history.

 

All we can really do is be supportive and strong for each other. One day at a time is the best advice. And also focus on the small moments like sharing a mate in the morning, FaceTime with family and friends, making a picada on Friday nights, things that help remind us why we're on this crazy adventure in the first place. We have great days, okay days, and some very bad ones too but the most important thing to remember is we are together, not separated by 5,000 miles anymore. That's what's grounded us through everything.

We believe everyone is on the same boat.  My husband does have EAD/AP, but we have refrained from looking for jobs because my parents (elderly) live with us and we live in Florida (YAY epicenter).  So, he feels like he is in this limbo and he just wants to be able to move on with our lives.  But, I do try to be as supportive as I can, just like you.

 

We also struggle with finding ways to keep it entertaining, especially with so many places being closed.  We have gone from legos, to puzzles, to binge watching, you name it!  Haha  Thankfully, though, we are not bored yet!

 

I completely understand what you mean in being able to put ourselves in their shoes.  There is so much that is happening in their brains and their support system is basically one person (us) in the USA.  But, we will make it through.

 

I get what you mean with good, ok, and bad days.  One of the things that my husband and I keep thinking is that not only are we going through immigration and getting used to being married, but those of us that have gone this route face the fact that, even though our relationships are for years and you've spent plenty of time together, we are not coming together from the same place.  So, like you said, we (the USC) have been here, we are used to life here and we got our routine going, all we are doing is adding a plus one, which is similar to marrying another USC.  BUT, they (beneficiaries/significant others) are not coming from the same place, so they are adding a new significant other, new country, new language, etc., their stresses and struggles are so much more and the communication it takes to make it work is at another level.  I feel blessed to have known my husband for a decade before all of this, being friends, etc., but no one will every understand what these types of marriages have to go through and I believe that, when you make it work like we all do, it puts is in a different category of success.

 

Your ideas are great, maybe we will do a picada this Friday! 

 

For us and all of you, PATIENCE, COMMUNICATION, and SPACE are three words that we are practicing to excel in what we are facing as individuals and as a couple during this uncertain times.

[rominavairoletti 4]

awesome, great idea! though I am not yet in the U.S. (still in the visa process), hopefully I´ll be there soon!

 

[rominavairoletti 4]

9 minutes ago, rominavairoletti said:

awesome, great idea! though I am not yet in the U.S. (still in the visa process), hopefully I´ll be there soon!

 

It seems like I´m the only from Argentina who has a family based visa

[Fe.Ta 874]

1 hour ago, rominavairoletti said:

It seems like I´m the only from Argentina who has a family based visa

You are not the only one. It is just not as common. Have you checked out the portal here on VJ to look for other timelines and cases that are FB from Argentina?