The Best Things in Life are Free (or Not ?!)

[Henia 11]

Esalaam/Hello/Salut

Love (ok everything I talk about lately pertains to love. Sappy I know) So what I list is also With all of us going throu this Visa Journey (hopefully) for love. It makes you wonder in amazement all the things we would do in the name of love.

Looking

Hugs

Cuddling

Kisses

Talking

Walking

Seeping

Weather.... are free right. We all enjoyed these things with our SOs.

It is the truth and I know money plays a big role in our pleasure but ultimately it is upon us. What does this have to do with my OT? Well, let me explain. We all are here for the end goal of getting our SOs here, with us. Some of us have been blessed with speedy, easy approvals, while others have not. Some get the chance to be with their SOs regularly (living or visiting) while other rarely make there enough due to time and financial issues. In the end, is it all worth? As we have seen succesful hapy reunions, then also *some* unhappy endings. In the end, at the end of this, my long drawn out question is... if they got denied, would would go live there with your SO in their country? And back to my first sentence of this paragraph, it is all comes down to money; how important it is and has been in our lives, what standard we except to live under, etc.

Materialistic or not, leaving the cushy I am sure most of you lead (live) here in the US is hard. Even in the name of love. Could you do it? Would you do it? All thos hugs, kisses and love words that we get from our SOs would equal the value of giving up our living standard? Would the best things in life be really free then? Or would we pay the ultimate cost?Even if we do value hugs and love, it rarely comes to us 'for free'. Sad but true. The waiting period for the intangible loving and cuddly may exceed your life span, if you wait for that denial to be overturned, thinking i just want to wait it out. And not live with your SO in your country? Life is strange and unpredictable...and so is the money, you can have it one day and lose it all the next, it certainly is not a guarantee of happiness. My mother used to say 'It isn't how much money you have that matters but how much you can stand on your feet if you lose it that is more important'.So anyway that was little off-topic

I was very materialistic ... I am ashamed of this fact ... I consumed so much of this world (thinking I would have in my adulthood what I didnt in childhood) ... ignorance is ugly I know... but now I could care less, esp after the traumatic ordeal with my husband. I could live in Algeria, for all my life, liking, not liking... would not matter, as long as we were together. I would know there would be a way for us. I remember my husband waiting desperately for my visits, or making the most of seeing the lovely sunny day out of the hospital window. Knowing it was only me, who came to really take care of him...He made me remember to cherish every moment with those people around me because nothing lasts forever. Aaaah ok I got that off my chest. . I will cry now I mean you ladies (and some gents out there), neither agree or disagree ...hasal eh? coup d'etat Would you leave all this life (in the US) behind for your SO? I mean (many) of us had already paid a high price just playing this visa game.

Edited June 21, 2007 by Henia

[Henia 11]

If I had three wishes, it wouldn't be for a dollars, nice house and car (although throw them my way and I promise i'll accept them graciously ) it would be for a pause button, rewind and record x And I think the following song nicely explains it all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hxVOoaZGlak

Edited June 21, 2007 by Henia

[Becky&Sam 0]

I would move if that is what it takes for us to be together and the visa is not issued for some reason. I have two children, but they have not seen or spoken to their father in almost three years and he is always in trouble with the state for evading child support so don't think he will ever show up or be there for them any time soon. So taking them from US they would not be losing their relationship with their father. He has already ruined that himself (very sad for my children). THey would move with us to be a family together. I think that we would not stay there permanently and eventually come here to US to live, especially as my children have sort of agreed they would go IF they knew we were going to move back to US in not too long. THey are old enough that we could put them in an international school and I think that they would be okay with that for a time.

Sam has had several job offers in the past couple of months to work in Dubai for very very good salary and paying in US dollars so imagine what that would be in LE. It has been very hard for him to turn those jobs down when we don't know the time frame for his visa issuance.

I think that we could live very comfortably wherever we are together and yes there would some luxuries that we have here that would have to be given up, but in reality there are a lot of things we have that once they are gone you realize maybe you didn't need that so much after all and life is simpler without it.

We are hoping for the visa for Sam to come here and us to live here, especially for the kids, but I would not hesitate to move wherever Sam has gotten a good job (probably not Cairo as the pay sucks there), but Dubai or some other area in Europe. Not in our plans, but is definitely doable for us.

[Henia 11]

Thanks for sharing Becky. For me, too I have no hestitation to move. My daughter's father is a 0 for us too. My husband now is much better father. Being together is what is important for us. But for many people moving to a third world country (or developing) is not acceptable.

[Henia 11]

Repost: Neither agree or disagree ...hasal eh? coup d'etat ladies and gents?

[StupidJourney 0]

It's strange, even though we were one of the few blessed with a quick, painless approval, lately more and more I've brought up the subject of us living in Morocco.

And the strange thing is, money is probably one of the reasons we would move THERE. We're over our heads in debt with a prior credit card bill I had before he came here, his medical bills, and school. I make well over the median income for someone in my area, but we're barely getting by, and money woes keep us both up at night.

Not to mention the fact that he misses his family terribly, and to be quite honest, I do love my family, but I could actually live with just seeing them once a year or so. He couldn't. I lived in Morocco close to year with maybe a monthly telephone call from home and none of this daily webcam video chats that he's able to do and I was fine with that. He hasn't been able to make friends, so if I'm stuck working, he's stuck at home, and even though he works a full time job and takes 20 hours worth of classes at night, he complains of being bored.

And to be honest, it actually sounds nice right now to live in Morocco and not worry about the working 60 hours a week while leaving an infant child with some stranger in daycare and worrying about being successful and having a good career and blah blah blah.

Yeah, I remember missing things like having my own car, being able to go out alone (I get harassed too much when alone in Morocco), not being so damn sweaty all the time (and I do live in Texas), speaking to people in English (my darija is horrible and my the phrases I know best are the ones I shouldn't repeat!), Mexican food, and CHEESE (NOT vache qui rit!) But maybe living there would afford us with the more important things - discussing a novel I actually had time to read while sipping fresh orange juice in a cafe with Hamid, having the time to cook fresh healthy meals instead of picking up sandwhiches, having an actual vacation in the summer, midday siestas, maybe actually writing that novel that I only have unfinished chapters of. Just enjoying life - instead of worrying about money constantly.

I'm still not sure where I stand on the issue. But the idea definitely appeals to me more an more.