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yuna628

With no child care or summer camps, women are being edged out of the workforce

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In honor of Layla, here's one heck of a head-scratching article to me. It's won loathing from all over the internet today. The gist? The wife seems like she's a successful business-owner that employs other successful women, also seems to be sole bread-winner. Husband seems like he's been taking time off to figure out what he wants to do with his life or something. Then the lockdowns hit, so wife was working from home and only child was also home (because I guess they were accustomed to just dumping the child wherever). After three days the husband refused to you know.. be a father, made attempts to make his child misbehave and guilt trip mom, and essentially went into tantrum mode so that wife (still coddling husband) decides she'll quit her job and fire all her employees. Hope husband is happy now living off of the wife's savings. I wanted a lot more from this lengthy piece of complaining - such as the husband to explain why he no longer wants to be a parent and why the wife was prepared to think that was okay. There's numerous other examples in the article, how women are making choices to be the ones sitting home. But the guy in this one was particularly annoying. All the single fathers or stay at homes out there that actually do care about your kids, I salute. But there are some couples that perhaps really should not procreate and others that have really strange ideas about parenting in general. https://www.thelily.com/i-had-to-choose-being-a-mother-with-no-child-care-or-summer-camps-women-are-being-edged-out-of-the-workforce/

 

 

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Not to excuse the manchild father in the least, but is her decision really black and white? Is There is no other decision that would allow her to work less than 70 hours? 

 

As far as kids bouncing around during conferences and not having good boundaries, everyone from newscasters to instructors are in that boat. No one is expecting there to be no children like that castle in Chitty Chitty bangbang. 

 

I couldn't read the entire article because the writer is all over the place comparing women in this skill and opportunity category to the working poor.

 

The overall theme about 80% pay and the social burden of maintaining house and home falling to women...I don't see the the primary subject as a good example.

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by 90DayFinancier
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8 minutes ago, 90DayFinancier said:

Not to excuse the manchild father in the least, but is her decision really black and white? Is There is no other decision that would allow her to work less than 70 hours? 

 

As far as kids bouncing around during conferences and not having good boundaries, everyone from newscasters to instructors are in that boat. No one is expecting there to be no children like that castle in Chitty Chitty bangbang. 

 

I couldn't read the entire article because the writer is all over the place comparing women in this skill and opportunity category to the working poor.

 

The overall theme about 80% pay and the social burden of maintaining house and home falling to women...I don't the the primary subject as a good example.

 

 

 

 

 

I suspect the father just refused to do anything for the child, and with no one else to "watch" him, there wasn't any other option. If she can't rely on her husband, who can she rely on, and then you start wondering why have kids in the first place? I find that quitting and firing all her employees was a crazy way to go. Though the company was made up of mostly women that seemingly had similar pressures put on them I assume. Those that know her publicly thought it odd she was so open with this story, and also noted that the husband refused to comment. Oh to be living in that house!

2 minutes ago, Randyandyuni said:

He’s a POS, her priorities are off I feel no pity for either of them, just the kid

Yeah, and that's what I'm getting from it too. Ordinarily I'd assume he'd just be bounced from school or daycare to grandmas or something with neither parent actually doing any parenting. When it's time to actually put in the work both parents have a meltdown.

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Filed: O-2 Visa Country: Sweden
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I have seen so many friends in the tech industry where the husband sour on children and parenthood and cynical to boot.  In three cases I can remember, they wound up being the model father and primary caregiver. 

 

I have seen the total opposite where the enthusiastic husband folds once the reality of loosing their indepence sets in. 

 

We don't know this guy's side of story and what commitments were made It's probably unfair to judge him. She did allude to the fact that her commitments had changed due to a loss of business. 

 

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Both need to suck it up, the kid is not their pawn in her proving she is the man and that clown living the Peter Pan life.

 

I work in IT also and there are some women that feel the need to emasculate their peers and life partners, not many but the ones that due are incredibly cruel and demeaning

 

 

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I agree that her winding up the company seemed like a massive overreaction. Was there no way she could scale back her work? Hire part-time workers? Her husband sounds awful and manipulative and she sounds overwhelmed and overcommitted to work as opposed to balancing it with her family demands.

 

I felt worst for the young woman who was getting a chance at a step up in Reno, but she seems to be fairly centered and realistic about what's happening.

 

Personally not much has changed for me since I wasn't working before lockdown, but I was getting ready to go back to work before all this happened. I miss having something to do beyond the home, having some identity outside of homemaker. So when that woman said having a career meant that she could say she was something more than someone's mom it resonated with me.

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32 minutes ago, Randyandyuni said:

Both need to suck it up, the kid is not their pawn in her proving she is the man and that clown living the Peter Pan life.

 

I work in IT also and there are some women that feel the need to emasculate their peers and life partners, not many but the ones that due are incredibly cruel and demeaning

agreed.  i work in IT and sometimes do 96 hour weeks for 2-3 straight about 4-5 times a year, and i'm a single dad.  those two need to get their act together.

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Time for the woman to divorce this idiot.

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