I'm an Indian married to a US citizen and live in the US. But my parents are not aware of this. How will this affect their visa application?

[johannl 0]

Long story short, my parents are from a very traditional Hindu background and would be very hurt if they learned that I married someone from outside our caste, let alone an atheist foreigner. I thus decided to never tell them. They’re very old in their seventies and I just don’t want to them discover this fact and lose their tranquility in the twilight of their lives. For the sake of this question, please assume this decision as given. I’m still in touch with my parents and we talk once or twice every month.

The problem is, they may want to visit the US. I wouldn’t have to invite them; they have the financial means to apply for a visitor’s visa and come here by themselves. In this case, they would have to provide information about their son which includes my marital status. They will be putting it as “single”, and I’m guessing the immigration officer will most likely catch the inconsistency and reject their application.

Do I need to worry about this? If yes, will the officer let them know exactly why it was rejected, thus revealing my true marital status to them?

 

I have asked this question on other forums and received varied answers. Some points of concern :

 

The DS-160 visa application does not ask for marital status. It does ask however, my status in the US (US citizen, permanent resident, etc). They will be putting in 'temporary worker' since they're not aware of my permanent status. Even if in some way I communicate to them to put in "PR holder" without revealing my marriage, it might cause inconsistencies in the interview process since I will be the main stated reason for the visit, and they will be unknowingly answering wrongly to questions about me. Tourist interviews are short and if the Officer believes parents are concealing facts it won't go well and may get denied.

 

Now, this is fine even if it does jeopardize their chances of getting the visa, what I'm *more* concerned about is the immigration office letting them know the exact reasons for rejection, and my details to them. Elsewhere I have received varied suggestions, but the consensus seems to be that even if the visa is denied they will give my parents a paper with the section under which their visa was rejected, not a particular reason. Is this accurate? and what about inconsistent answers *during* the interview process? is it a possibility that the officer crosschecks the info there itself and informs them?

 

Lastly, is it a bad idea or a valid option to write to the embassy (after the submission of the DS-160 form) informing them of my situation ? will they be cooperative ?

 

Thanks

 

[Just Paul 4,595]

They need to state that you are a permanent resident.   How you got that status isn't relevant to the process. You could have adjusted from a work visa.  Could it come up that you are married in the interview?   It is possible.

[johannl 0]

21 minutes ago, Paul & Mary said:

They need to state that you are a permanent resident.   How you got that status isn't relevant to the process. You could have adjusted from a work visa.  Could it come up that you are married in the interview?   It is possible.

I see, my marital status could come up in the interview. I don't mind if the visa gets rejected because they gave wrong answers, I'm asking if there a possibility that the visa officer discloses my information in any way?

[Letspaintcookies 2,310]

47 minutes ago, johannl said:

I see, my marital status could come up in the interview. I don't mind if the visa gets rejected because they gave wrong answers, I'm asking if there a possibility that the visa officer discloses my information in any way?

I don't know how deep they go into your file and have your complete information while interviewing your parents but the possibility is always there that it comes up and might get disclosed. I guess nobody can say for sure it won't happen. As far as a possible denial statement goes it won't say anything about what exactly was wrong in a way "answered questions about childs martial status wrong".

 

And I honestly don't think that sending an email explaining the situation will help. I have the feeling that the people at the embassy don't like to get involved in things like that.

Edited May 15, 2020 by Letspaintcookies

[SusieQQQ 11,587]

1 hour ago, johannl said:

I see, my marital status could come up in the interview. I don't mind if the visa gets rejected because they gave wrong answers, I'm asking if there a possibility that the visa officer discloses my information in any way?

Maybe your parents mind? 
Maybe you should just go visit them rather than have them get their hopes up and potentially get rejected for reasons they don’t understand (could be quite distressing at that age when they think they have done something wrong and can’t visit their child as as a result), or if they do get the visa and come and visit you and then ...what, you’ll hide your spouse? Maybe the kinder thing is to tell them you don’t want them to travel because of their age and you go visit them alone, and you keep your secret.

[johannl 0]

8 minutes ago, SusieQQQ said:

Maybe your parents mind? 
Maybe you should just go visit them rather than have them get their hopes up and potentially get rejected for reasons they don’t understand (could be quite distressing at that age when they think they have done something wrong and can’t visit their child as as a result), or if they do get the visa and come and visit you and then ...what, you’ll hide your spouse? Maybe the kinder thing is to tell them you don’t want them to travel because of their age and you go visit them alone, and you keep your secret.

Oh I do visit them once a year.. I'm wondering what I should say if they decide to want to come here and insist on it.

And btw, my wife already knows everything and is understanding. It's not really a matter of shame or anything, its a sad and unfortunate situation arisen from ultra orthodox and backwards culture and mindsets. It's out of my control. At least my family is not violent, otherwise I would've ghosted them long ago, in India actual honor killings still happen. If that were the case, "hiding" my wife would be a matter of survival.

Edited May 15, 2020 by johannl

[Isoversa 8]

There have been cases where a relative goes on an interview, only then do they learn that so and so has married/ remarried etc. If your concern is them finding out about your wife, then you wouldn't want the risk of them facing the consular officer.

It's plausible that the CO would ask something like, "who is *name drop* (name of your wife)? ". and of course they wouldn't have any idea since they didn't know you were married in the first place. Then the CO would go on and reject the visa on the basis of something along the lines of "sponsor/person they will be visiting is privy to some information, thus is deemed unwelcoming of the visitors". I'm sure there's some legal way of phrasing that but the principle applies. 

 

Edited May 15, 2020 by Isoversa

[johannl 0]

1 minute ago, Isoversa said:

There have been cases where a relative goes on an interview, only then do they learn that so and so has married/ remarried etc. If your concern is them finding out about your wife, then you wouldn't want the risk of them facing the consular officer.

It's plausible that the CO would ask something like, "who is - - - (name of your wife)? ". and of course they wouldn't have any idea. Then the CO would go on and reject the visa on the basis of something along the lines of "sponsor/person they will be visiting is privy to some information, thus is deemed unwelcoming of the visitors". I'm sure there's some legal way of phrasing that but the principle applies. 

 

rather ironic that they say "sponsor/person they will be visiting is privy to some information" after revealing the name, lol. So writing to the embassy is an absolute no-go then?

Looks like it's impossible to maintain selective privacy in this world, guess I should just hope they never wish to come or I'm able to dissuade them from coming

[johannl 0]

Ultimately, whether the CO approve or reject the application is completely up to them. I can't control the outcome. All I request is that my information to not be disclosed and the rejection letter to not be obviously implying I'm hiding something.

[Isoversa 8]

11 minutes ago, johannl said:

rather ironic that they say "sponsor/person they will be visiting is privy to some information" after revealing the name, lol. So writing to the embassy is an absolute no-go then?

Looks like it's impossible to maintain selective privacy in this world, guess I should just hope they never wish to come or I'm able to dissuade them from coming

Regarding writing to the embassy for this reason, I don't have/hear any experience about that so I can't say for sure, but I'm inclined to say it's probably not the best idea. 

Do your parents have other relatives in the US? That might be a way to take off the focus on you. Or are they professionals that might be attending a conference of some sort? Those are the only ways I can think of that might not involve you. But as long as they might want to visit you, and as parents that's a given, you're always gonna into that risk of discovery of your secret. 

[johannl 0]

Yup. You're probably right.. thanks for the replies.

I've made up my mind. Best option is to just never invite/ dissuade them from coming.

[NikLR 13,231]

They would have to be truthful on their application and since youre not being truthful, they may be denied for lying when they dont know they are.  At least its not willful misrepresentation. No the consulate likely isnt telling them, oh we're denying you because you dont know the name of your son's wife. 

If they come visit you how are you keeping your marriage secret? 

[NikLR 13,231]

~~moved to tourist visas from bringing family members of USC. Op is LPR seeking advice on tourist visas for his parents~~

[SusieQQQ 11,587]

I seriously doubt a CO would drop a spouse’s name. CO might be curious why your parents are applying for a visa now but didn’t for your wedding, not sure they’d actually ask that. But it’s entirely possible the marriage comes up in the context of your status in the US.  
 

I doubt writing a letter will help as (1) the embassy will follow its own procedures not yours (2) it’s your parents’ application, not yours. The embassy can’t go adding in arbitrary unsolicited correspondence into other people’s files. 

Edited May 15, 2020 by SusieQQQ

[Cyberfx1024 7,980]

9 hours ago, johannl said:

Long story short, my parents are from a very traditional Hindu background and would be very hurt if they learned that I married someone from outside our caste, let alone an atheist foreigner. I thus decided to never tell them. They’re very old in their seventies and I just don’t want to them discover this fact and lose their tranquility in the twilight of their lives. For the sake of this question, please assume this decision as given. I’m still in touch with my parents and we talk once or twice every month.

The problem is, they may want to visit the US. I wouldn’t have to invite them; they have the financial means to apply for a visitor’s visa and come here by themselves. In this case, they would have to provide information about their son which includes my marital status. They will be putting it as “single”, and I’m guessing the immigration officer will most likely catch the inconsistency and reject their application.

Do I need to worry about this? If yes, will the officer let them know exactly why it was rejected, thus revealing my true marital status to them?

 

I have asked this question on other forums and received varied answers. Some points of concern :

 

The DS-160 visa application does not ask for marital status. It does ask however, my status in the US (US citizen, permanent resident, etc). They will be putting in 'temporary worker' since they're not aware of my permanent status. Even if in some way I communicate to them to put in "PR holder" without revealing my marriage, it might cause inconsistencies in the interview process since I will be the main stated reason for the visit, and they will be unknowingly answering wrongly to questions about me. Tourist interviews are short and if the Officer believes parents are concealing facts it won't go well and may get denied.

 

Now, this is fine even if it does jeopardize their chances of getting the visa, what I'm *more* concerned about is the immigration office letting them know the exact reasons for rejection, and my details to them. Elsewhere I have received varied suggestions, but the consensus seems to be that even if the visa is denied they will give my parents a paper with the section under which their visa was rejected, not a particular reason. Is this accurate? and what about inconsistent answers *during* the interview process? is it a possibility that the officer crosschecks the info there itself and informs them?

 

Lastly, is it a bad idea or a valid option to write to the embassy (after the submission of the DS-160 form) informing them of my situation ? will they be cooperative ?

 

Thanks

 

I gave you some very good answers on your Reddit post.