A Post-Quarantine Divorce Boom Is Looming

[90DayFinancier 910]

4 hours ago, Nature Boy 2.0 said:

Since I am at risk and staying home and my wife works in a high risk environment,  we are kind of doing our own thing at home.

 

I did get out and do an 8 mile walk today. Reminded I done got old

8 Miles? Kudos

[millefleur 5,047]

1 hour ago, TBoneTX said:

Classified Ad:  Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand-sanitizer for good clean fun.

OK, I have to admit this make me smirk out loud.  Laughing reaction emoji well deserved for this one.

Edited April 18, 2020 by millefleur

[yuna628 9,686]

I really don't understand the people that seemingly can't stand to be in the vicinity of the same person they chose to love and marry. I'm very happy my husband is home, I don't know what I'd honestly do without him these difficult days. Being thankful that the person you love is alive, safe, and home should be a relief... not a burden. If a quarantine somehow leads to a divorce, it would seem the marriage was in trouble long before this started..

[Steeleballz 7,550]

6 minutes ago, yuna628 said:

I really don't understand the people that seemingly can't stand to be in the vicinity of the same person they chose to love and marry. I'm very happy my husband is home, I don't know what I'd honestly do without him these difficult days. Being thankful that the person you love is alive, safe, and home should be a relief... not a burden. If a quarantine somehow leads to a divorce, it would seem the marriage was in trouble long before this started..

 

  Well many probably are in trouble, but I don't think it's the quarantine per se. Many of the common triggers for divorce such as domestic violence, financial stress and conflict/argument are going to be exacerbated. I think it's just accelerating the timeline for marriages that were heading that way anyway. There may be an increase in divorces over the next few months, but less after that. 

 

  It's more like quarantine is sort of the opposite of flattening the curve when it comes to marriage problems. All the cases that were going to happen over the next year will probably happen sooner, but numbers overall wont change.

[TBoneTX 45,571]

"Company loves misery."

[laylalex 7,293]

34 minutes ago, TBoneTX said:

"Company loves misery."

I'd give you an upvote but I'm trying to balance you and Boiler out again.

[TBoneTX 45,571]

19 minutes ago, laylalex said:

I'm trying to balance you and Boiler out again.

Bad LL ma'am!  Bad, BAD LL ma'am!  

[cyclone27 710]

If those getting a divorce because of spending too much time together I theorize probably would have divorced at a future date anyways this quarantine just sped things along quicker.

[Burnt Reynolds 5,058]

13 minutes ago, cyclone27 said:

If those getting a divorce because of spending too much time together I theorize probably would have divorced at a future date anyways this quarantine just sped things along quicker.

Yep, where strong relationships create a bigger bond at "the other side", relationships that aren't strong anyways wilt faster at key signs of adversity.. financial being one of the top ones. 

 

This is in some ways where we're fighting nature. People derive expectations that solidify over time, we become entrapped in routine-like behaviors, people's expectations form around it, but unfortunately life isn't as controlled and conformed to expectations. So when adversity hits, people can have difficulty dealing with it, and a lack of experience with this with that partner can easily drive many couples apart.

 

This is why I've never been a fan of the dating scene, it gets the tone for expectations based on the best case scenario (for many people it's actually a facade), and helps facilitate the irrationality that follows when people experience something beyond the psychological normal (which should be considered a high). 

 

tl;dr->Set expectations low, get to know the person. It'll save you a lot of hassle later. 

Edited April 18, 2020 by Burnt Reynolds

[TBoneTX 45,571]

1 hour ago, Burnt Reynolds said:

relationships that aren't strong anyways wilt faster at key signs of adversity.. financial being one of the top ones. 

Financial, certainly.

 

An overlooked one is the birth of children.  Children make a solid relationship stronger, but it can weaken tenuous ones -- if for no other reason that you don't SLEEP for the first 3 years.