Beer Contains Female Hormones!

[Portlander 0]

hahaha ... I thought it was funny.

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. "I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces. "The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves.."

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?" The doctor quickly responded, "$5,000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain." The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked.

A man unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?" The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've actually been used."

Why can't Helen Keller drive?

Cause she's a woman...

Whats better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics?

Not being retarded...

Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?

They won't stop and ask for directions

Why are married women heavier than single women?

Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.

Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

What do men usually get on the SATs?

Drool

If you can't laugh at people who are are different than yourself, who CAN you laugh at?

[natty bumppo 297]

You are in so much trouble .... wait until others read this

[mRx 16]

You are in so much trouble .... wait until others read this

I agree... Portlander, you better start running.

[no name 1]

hahaha ... I thought it was funny.

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. "I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces. "The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, very risky but it is the only hope. Insurance will cover the procedure, but you will have to pay for the brain yourselves.."

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?" The doctor quickly responded, "$5,000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain." The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked.

A man unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?" The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and explained to the entire group, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've actually been used."

Why can't Helen Keller drive?

Cause she's a woman...

Whats better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics?

Not being retarded...

Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?

They won't stop and ask for directions

Why are married women heavier than single women?

Single women come home, see what's in the fridge and go to bed.

Married women come home, see what's in bed and go to the fridge.

What do men usually get on the SATs?

Drool

If you can't laugh at people who are are different than yourself, who CAN you laugh at?

Gee, a man thought it was funny, go figure.

2 women found this funny & the rest are men.

Many more were offended.

Edited June 13, 2007 by devilette

[Portlander 0]

I have more....

What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Why are all dumb blonde jokes one-liners?

So men can understand them.

How can you turn a fox into an elephant?

Marry her

How do you fix a woman's watch?

- It doesn't matter. There is a clock on the oven.

[no name 1]

I have more....

What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

You didn't hold the pillow down long enough.

Why are all dumb blonde jokes one-liners?

So men can understand them.

How can you turn a fox into an elephant?

Marry her

How do you fix a woman's watch?

- It doesn't matter. There is a clock on the oven.

Stop.

Edited June 13, 2007 by devilette

[Portlander 0]

So your tolerence level gets to determine my rights of free speech?

[mRx 16]

So your tolerence level gets to determine my rights of free speech?

There is no such thing as free speech on VJ. Everything you say here will cost you.

[Portlander 0]

I certainly don't mean to direct this at anyone in particular, but some peoepl, with the best of intentions, act like they are the most important people around, and that their own point of view is the right one. Liberal and Conservatives suffer equally from this, although it is a defining characteristic of the Religious Right.

Fact of the matter is that if a subject is taboo, then it is absolutely and wholly detrimental to the advancement of any real progress in that area. It is tacit approval that there is a very real difference. Dogma just isn't a good way to get anyone to do anything. Like the Pres said, - 'it would be much easier if I were the dictator' ... it just so happens that that isn't the way to get anything accomplished in any meaningful way.

Specifically, it doesn't do anyone good at all to pretend that differences don't exist between men and women. It is directly harmful to everyone to do so. These jokes may not be funny to everyone, but their content is not sexist in and of itself. They can even be one of the most effective tools in combating sexism. Depending on how they are used.

[mawilson 2,133]

Despite women being the root cause of evil in the world they have managed to rise to positions

of power and prominence in Western society due to incessant whining and nagging and the guys

in charge before being busy playing World of Warcraft.

There are no borders or boundaries to this struggle. The enemy is everywhere. Your “girlfriend”?

The enemy. Condoleezza Rice? The enemy. Lindsay Lohan? The enemy. Your mum? Yes, even she

is the enemy.

So you’ve read this article and now want to try and combat the marauding female threat and need

to learn how to be a misogynist? Here are some tips:

• Refer to women as bіtches or pussіes. Likening women to animals makes them hate you less and want to sex you more. Don’t worry, it’s not bestiality either.
  
• Become a homosexual
  
• Become a Muslim
  
• Become white and Southern
  
• Release a rap album
  
• Smack yo bіtch up
  
• Surprise sex a female stranger once in a while
  
• Hire a hooker, take her back to yours, make a snuff movie and then sell it to azn businessmen. Capitalism is the $hit!!1
  
• Enter a lesbian nightclub with a hypodermic needle full of AIDS blood and inject away
  
• Fake your death and frame some bіtch for your murder like that awesome film Double Jeopardy
  

Good luck and Xenu speed, brave soldier!

[Fandango 1,440]

What a disappointment.

[Jenn! 918]

What a disappointment.

Not for me. You can only be disappointed if you actually expected something better.

[Fandango 1,440]

What a disappointment.

Not for me. You can only be disappointed if you actually expected something better.

You're right, I shouldn't have given some the benefit of the doubt.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

1) Argued over nothing.

2) Refused to apologize when obviously wrong.

3) Gained weight.

4) Talked excessively without making sense.

5) Became overly emotiona l.

6) Couldn't drive.

7) Failed to think rationally

8) Had to sit down while urinating

seems this caused quite a stink over night i personally dont find it funny or degradeing its a joke!!! i dont need to drink to know how some drunks act a person can see it every day. So its acceptable to do a blonde joke of a woman who looks in the mirrow thinking shes looking at a police officer when shes seeing herself how often in daily life is that going to happen?

Have none of us known women that argue over nothing (drunk or sober) and this could apply to men also

Have none of us known women that refused to apologize when they were totally wrong(drunk or sober) this can apply to men also

Women dont gain weight? i think men do to....

No one has seen a woman who talks excessively without making sense(drunk or sober) give either man or woman a few drinks and watch sometime....

Have you never seen a woman (or man) become emotional give them both a few drinks and they soon decide their whole world is ending and no one loves them

Every woman can drive good? can every man drive good? give them both a few drinks and watch

Some women fail to think rationally at times as do a few men give them a few drinks and see how sensible their answers become

Now true women will sit down to urinate as have a few men when they cant stand up any longer and i bet theres also a few women that have tried standing up

so no its not degradeing its life as are the blonde jokes but the real joke is on the people that can see themselves within some of these things (sober or drunk) Darn even 1, 2, and 5 could be shown here on VJ

[Fandango 1,440]

But I think the point that you're failing to grasp is that it's talking about women as a whole being basically emotional, incapable, illogical people. Now I'm far from Ms Feminist, but at the same time, I think women have come a long way and don't need people mocking a stereotype that is so wrong and degrading. Especially from another woman, which I find astounding.

You know, once a coworker didn't show up for a meeting he called with me and one other person. I was furious because I had come into the office specifically because he asked me to. I told him in no uncertain terms that that sort of behavior would not be tolerated and that if he requested a meeting with me, he'd better have the decency and professionalism to not waste my time.

His response? He brought me flowers and chocolate. Not in a patronizing way, he was actually being sincere.

It's bullsh!t and sexist, just like this joke. It's meant to be funny and cutesy, but at the end of the day it's not.