Got divorced before the interview

[Dashinka 24,519]

6 hours ago, AliceFL said:

The divorced had been signed for both of us... and its with his lawyer already.

 

what you mean with he still wants to continue with the I-864?

 

we are trying to be together again...but in different houses.

 

Are you both planning on canceling the divorce prior to it being finalized on the court?  If so, then you are still married, so your biggest issue will be trying to explain to the IO at USCIS why you are living apart.

 

Good Luck!

[AliceFL 0]

its true! Do you think its an impossible thing to do?

Edited December 30, 2019 by AliceFL

[AliceFL 0]

4 hours ago, Russ&MaryAnn said:

If the divorce documents haven’t been submitted to the court by his lawyer, and a final decree approved by a judge it’s not complete and can be withdrawn 

what you mean? withdrawn?

[Russ&MaryAnn 110]

9 minutes ago, AliceFL said:

what you mean? withdrawn?

Until a divorce is finalized in court it’s not complete. And so you and your husband can choose to not have it processed in court. If you both choose to do that you’re not divorced 

[igoyougoduke 1,656]

2 hours ago, AliceFL said:

what you mean? withdrawn?

cancel the divorce . Once a judge signs your odds of immigration are zero. sorry to be blunt.  

[WaterLeaf 200]

I have a feeling that the OP need to get more detail about the filing report, how is it finalized, and about the I-864.

 

IMO, both married party must know about their document equally. That makes it easier to answer the question sooner.

 

Step 1 is to go back and find out the previous questions not answered...

 

I'm no way trying to go off topic, but it just doesn't seem right when OP doesn't know to the answers of finalized divorce and I-864. Sometimes it's better to know for better outcome of the answer. *Shrug*

[Highmystic 234]

14 hours ago, AliceFL said:

We met outside USA and fell in love... I decided to leave all my life behind to start this new life with him... so we applied for k1 visa... everything was beautiful... I got here and between 90 days we got legally married... but things started to get difficult living together in the same house... so he decided for the divorced... after a lot of stress I had to moved from his house... 

and then started living in different house we realized that we still love each other... we have our independence and life is much easier now. 

so we are trying to be together again. (it's normal to happen)

 

So... the USCIS its about to schedule our interview... 

 

We wanna go and explain everything... can we be denied?

I check in pretty much daily for the past 2 years, I read, I try to educate myself.  This case is becoming typical,  K1,  marriage, divorce. or separation.   Most times, I think, is not a fraudulent plan, but 2 people falling in love on line, meeting, and then filing, getting married, and all hell breaks loose, where they can't seem to actually live together as husband and wife.  Arguments on money mostly.  They fail to recall what it was that they fell in love with in the first place.  They forget that part of "Till death do us part"..   I feel sorry for those who try and fail, and encouraged by those to try and succeed.   For those men out there, all I have to say is "A Happy Wife is a Happy Life!".. for those who can not comprehend with your own egos,.  Best of luck.  There are differences in culture for sure, learn and be strong.  I actually enjoy Rice, Fish, Egg for breakfast!  I love a partnership, which is what marriage is to be.  For those who fall in love on line,  deal with it and make it grow once it is not on line, but in person. 

[AliceFL 0]

35 minutes ago, Highmystic said:

I check in pretty much daily for the past 2 years, I read, I try to educate myself.  This case is becoming typical,  K1,  marriage, divorce. or separation.   Most times, I think, is not a fraudulent plan, but 2 people falling in love on line, meeting, and then filing, getting married, and all hell breaks loose, where they can't seem to actually live together as husband and wife.  Arguments on money mostly.  They fail to recall what it was that they fell in love with in the first place.  They forget that part of "Till death do us part"..   I feel sorry for those who try and fail, and encouraged by those to try and succeed.   For those men out there, all I have to say is "A Happy Wife is a Happy Life!".. for those who can not comprehend with your own egos,.  Best of luck.  There are differences in culture for sure, learn and be strong.  I actually enjoy Rice, Fish, Egg for breakfast!  I love a partnership, which is what marriage is to be.  For those who fall in love on line,  deal with it and make it grow once it is not on line, but in person. 

It is super sad... 90 days to get married its almost nothing to know someone living in the same roof... 

My situation was like this: we met in another country... not mine, not his... fell in love... he used to go once in a month to see me... was like vacations for us... we used to wait for each other... visiting places together, smiling with the eyes, learning about others cultures... flying together.

we had night and night over the phone talking and making planes for the next time that we would be together... cry hugging each other every time we had to say goodbye (or see you soon).

Until we decided to come to meet his family here... OH but you have to get married in 90 days... ok, lets do it!!!! start to live together...

I wasnt alow to work yet... 

I didnt know anybody

I couldnt drive

I didnt have my family

for me was diferent country, language, culture... for him NO! so we weren't in the same page anymore

guess what? CHAOS

 

I would spend the day at home...waiting for him... dependent on him even to do my nails... just cooking...doing laundry...cleaning the house... NO WAAAAAAAAAY

(and a lot of other things) particular things...

I started to feel sad, useless... ( i used to like to get ready to go for a dinner with him) go dancing, travel, see the sunset... but all the complains ( I ve been working all day; you not tired because you didnt do anything at home... )

 

A lot of the magic of the love was broken after the marriage... was too fast... we would date more... 

 

90 days to a change you way of life based on what people wants ... on their time... is cruel... 

I really think the USCIS should start to think better about this rules...if they really want to give opportunity to solid relationships.

 

 

 

[Boiler 45,558]

7 minutes ago, AliceFL said:

It is super sad... 90 days to get married its almost nothing to know someone living in the same roof... 

My situation was like this: we met in another country... not mine, not his... fell in love... he used to go once in a month to see me... was like vacations for us... we used to wait for each other... visiting places together, smiling with the eyes, learning about others cultures... flying together.

we had night and night over the phone talking and making planes for the next time that we would be together... cry hugging each other every time we had to say goodbye (or see you soon).

Until we decided to come to meet his family here... OH but you have to get married in 90 days... ok, lets do it!!!! start to live together...

I wasnt alow to work yet... 

I didnt know anybody

I couldnt drive

I didnt have my family

for me was diferent country, language, culture... for him NO! so we weren't in the same page anymore

guess what? CHAOS

 

I would spend the day at home...waiting for him... dependent on him even to do my nails... just cooking...doing laundry...cleaning the house... NO WAAAAAAAAAY

(and a lot of other things) particular things...

I started to feel sad, useless... ( i used to like to get ready to go for a dinner with him) go dancing, travel, see the sunset... but all the complains ( I ve been working all day; you not tired because you didnt do anything at home... )

 

A lot of the magic of the love was broken after the marriage... was too fast... we would date more... 

 

90 days to a change you way of life based on what people wants ... on their time... is cruel... 

I really think the USCIS should start to think better about this rules...if they really want to give opportunity to solid relationships.

 

 

 

You will find very few cases here where a K1 is recommended, sadly people still go for it.

 

The old adage of do you research applies.

[geowrian 22,337]

33 minutes ago, AliceFL said:

It is super sad... 90 days to get married its almost nothing to know someone living in the same roof... 

...

Until we decided to come to meet his family here... OH but you have to get married in 90 days... ok, lets do it!!!! start to live together...

...

90 days to a change you way of life based on what people wants ... on their time... is cruel... 

I really think the USCIS should start to think better about this rules...if they really want to give opportunity to solid relationships.

The 90 days is only to marry. Figuring out if it was wise to marry or not is something that comes before even filing the I-129F. The 90 days is not meant to be a trial period or similar...it's strictly to do what you already committed to do.

The adage "don't do the crime if you can't do the time" applies. Sorry if it's a bit blunt, but the 90 days was never there to figure out if you were compatible living together.

Nobody with immigration forces a marriage. It sounds like things were just rushed. It happens...fairly often IMO. Learn from it. Grow. You'll be stronger in the end.

 

33 minutes ago, AliceFL said:

I wasnt alow to work yet... 

I didnt know anybody

I couldnt drive

I didnt have my family

for me was diferent country, language, culture... for him NO! so we weren't in the same page anymore

guess what? CHAOS

 

I would spend the day at home...waiting for him... dependent on him even to do my nails... just cooking...doing laundry...cleaning the house... NO WAAAAAAAAAY

(and a lot of other things) particular things...

I started to feel sad, useless... ( i used to like to get ready to go for a dinner with him) go dancing, travel, see the sunset... but all the complains ( I ve been working all day; you not tired because you didnt do anything at home... )

Yup, the K-1 is brutal, and it impacts certain types of people more than others (those with existing careers, especially IMO). Immigrating alone is very tough.

This is really a case where the CR-1 (spousal) visa is better suited all around - no issues being allowed to work, drive, travel, etc. No AOS. Little concern that if you breakup, your ability to stay is jeopardized (there is ROC, but denial and actual removal there is quite uncommon).

The only advantage (barring a limited circumstances with 18-20 year old kids) of a K-1 is it being slightly faster. It's really giving up a heck of a lot to save a few months...hence why many people often suggest the CR-1 route.

[user555 196]

5 hours ago, AliceFL said:

A lot of the magic of the love was broken after the marriage... was too fast... we would date more... 

 

90 days to a change you way of life based on what people wants ... on their time... is cruel... 

I really think the USCIS should start to think better about this rules...if they really want to give opportunity to solid relationships.

Who broke it? There are two of you that input love. You can still date now. You both can make choices about how you spend your time. I have just as much time in a day that you have. You can change your way of life and he can change. it's called compromise. It sounded like you enjoyed the "highs" of dating and forgot about the mundane aspects of ordinary life. You can't live on the mountaintop all the time. There are valleys too. Life goes up and down. There is a mix of the mundane and the exciting. USCIS is generous in offering 90 days. You are responsible for getting to know the person you will marry long before the 90 day visa starts. You say that you love each other but want to live separatley. That is a red flag for the immigration officer. 

[Cryssiekins 976]

9 minutes ago, user555 said:

Who broke it? There are two of you that input love. You can still date now. You both can make choices about how you spend your time. I have just as much time in a day that you have. You can change your way of life and he can change. it's called compromise. It sounded like you enjoyed the "highs" of dating and forgot about the mundane aspects of ordinary life. You can't live on the mountaintop all the time. There are valleys too. Life goes up and down. There is a mix of the mundane and the exciting. USCIS is generous in offering 90 days. You are responsible for getting to know the person you will marry long before the 90 day visa starts. You say that you love each other but want to live separatley. That is a red flag for the immigration officer. 

Agree.  
 

Long distance dating and living in marital union are very different things.

 

Coming on a K1 is hard, but there is no “dating” visa, so people need to be sure (as best they can) that they will both try to make it work.

 

Differences in culture play a part into this, and honestly, sometimes love isn’t enough, but you have to know that going in.

 

I was fully prepared to go back home with nothing (I gave up my place, my job, my everything) if it didn’t work out here.  
 

Any marriage is hard, which is why I still feel stunned when people want to rush in to a marriage.  You need to know someone inside and out before taking that leap.

 

When you’re just dating, your focus is 100% on the good times - seeing the person, enjoying the time, having good experiences.  When you move in, your also blending your regular life.  Who takes out the trash, does the cleaning, etc.  

 

Expecting it to be like a never ending date visit is unrealistic.   

[AliceFL 0]

6 hours ago, Boiler said:

You will find very few cases here where a K1 is recommended, sadly people still go for it.

 

The old adage of do you research applies.

We didnt know about any other visa.

[AliceFL 0]

1 hour ago, user555 said:

Who broke it? There are two of you that input love. You can still date now. You both can make choices about how you spend your time. I have just as much time in a day that you have. You can change your way of life and he can change. it's called compromise. It sounded like you enjoyed the "highs" of dating and forgot about the mundane aspects of ordinary life. You can't live on the mountaintop all the time. There are valleys too. Life goes up and down. There is a mix of the mundane and the exciting. USCIS is generous in offering 90 days. You are responsible for getting to know the person you will marry long before the 90 day visa starts. You say that you love each other but want to live separatley. That is a red flag for the immigration officer. 

yes... we are dating again... living in separate houses and we are happier than before. 

[Cryssiekins 976]

20 minutes ago, AliceFL said:

We didnt know about any other visa.

That’s on you to do research.

 

15 minutes ago, AliceFL said:

yes... we are dating again... living in separate houses and we are happier than before. 

The US doesn’t give dating visas.  It’s for family reunification.  Being married and living separately is not marital union.*
 

ETA:  *Schooling, military service, or a similar extenuate circumstance is different than just not being able to cohabitate based on personality.

Edited December 31, 2019 by Cryssiekins