Rante Macabre

[TBoneTX 45,155]

Still time to order one of this week's themed Pre-Owned Toilet Seats, $i... er, si man!

[janet3 1,170]

On 4/15/2020 at 8:21 PM, Ontarkie said:

The mice being back will be a forever issue since you are in Arkansas. I can't really say country because of of AR is country  

Absolute truth here.....mice, opossums, feral cats, skunk, ground hogs (which are actually very cute animals), armadillos (not very cute)......and squirrels 🐿. I am being overrun by squirrels. 

[DaveAndAnastasia 2,090]

Yesterday morning, PRG says she thinks she had some false labor and (other fallopian chant thing) and thinks she will give birth to mini-Dave in a few days. Not very surprised, as he was due in nine days anyway.

 

Yesterday afternoon, she says something rather painful is happening and we should call doctor (note -- this is our first baby, so we're fairly clueless about things that aren't in books). Immediately abandon routine teleconference where I almost always say very little to do so. On-call nurse says it sounds like you're having contractions, so when they reach proper frequency for an hour come in. So an hour later we start packing up and go to hospital.

 

And very early this morning, mini-Dave was born. 😃 Someone may have failed to calculate that if we got to the hospital at 4:30, the odds were pretty good that mini-Dave would not make an appearance until late that night or early this morning, and so only PRG had a change of clothes, toiletries, and such. So I'm home alone for the night (also because pull-out couch in postpartum room, while not horrible, wasn't great either).

Edited April 18, 2020 by DaveAndAnastasia

[Oliversmom 250]

I am sitting here tired of my hair.  It has been forever since I had a haircut and it is driving me crazy.  I am someone who can not stand the feel of long hair.  So I am debating whether to have my husband cut it.  Does he have any experience?  No.  Is he trained?  No.  Has he ever cut anyone's hair?  No.  I asked him and he said "I can try".  What do you think?  Should I go for it?

[Oliversmom 250]

1 minute ago, DaveAndAnastasia said:

Yesterday morning, PRG says she thinks she had some false labor and (other fallopian chant thing) and thinks she will give birth to mini-Dave in a few days. Not very surprised, as he was due in nine days anyway.

 

Yesterday afternoon, she says something rather painful is happening and we should call doctor (note -- this is our first baby, so we're fairly clueless about things that aren't in books). Immediately abandon routine teleconference where I almost always say very little to do so. On-call nurse says it sounds like you're having contractions, so when they reach proper frequency for an hour. So an hour later we start packing up and go to hospital.

 

And very early this morning, mini-Dave was born. 😃 Someone may have failed to calculate that if we got to the hospital at 4:30, the odds were pretty good that mini-Dave would not make an appearance until late that night or early this morning, and so only PRG had a change of clothes, toiletries, and such. So I'm home alone for the night (also because pull-out couch in postpartum room, while not horrible, wasn't great either).

Congrats on the birth of mini-Dave!  I hope Mom and baby are doing great.  

[Ontarkie 14,193]

6 minutes ago, DaveAndAnastasia said:

Yesterday morning, PRG says she thinks she had some false labor and (other fallopian chant thing) and thinks she will give birth to mini-Dave in a few days. Not very surprised, as he was due in nine days anyway.

 

Yesterday afternoon, she says something rather painful is happening and we should call doctor (note -- this is our first baby, so we're fairly clueless about things that aren't in books). Immediately abandon routine teleconference where I almost always say very little to do so. On-call nurse says it sounds like you're having contractions, so when they reach proper frequency for an hour. So an hour later we start packing up and go to hospital.

 

And very early this morning, mini-Dave was born. 😃 Someone may have failed to calculate that if we got to the hospital at 4:30, the odds were pretty good that mini-Dave would not make an appearance until late that night or early this morning, and so only PRG had a change of clothes, toiletries, and such. So I'm home alone for the night (also because pull-out couch in postpartum room, while not horrible, wasn't great either).

Yay congratulations! My husband staid the night after the Tornado was born but he has sleep apnea and made it very hard on him. I ended up sending him home for a nap. When the Jedi was born I sent him home at night. It was better for me I got more sleep with him gone lol

 

4 minutes ago, Oliversmom said:

I am sitting here tired of my hair.  It has been forever since I had a haircut and it is driving me crazy.  I am someone who can not stand the feel of long hair.  So I am debating whether to have my husband cut it.  Does he have any experience?  No.  Is he trained?  No.  Has he ever cut anyone's hair?  No.  I asked him and he said "I can try".  What do you think?  Should I go for it?

i let my son at the time he was probably 12 cut my hair, but he only had to cut a straight line. My hair was past my bum and I was sitting on it. It drove me nuts. So he cut it a couple inches below my shoulders. 

[rrobin0609 387]

10 minutes ago, DaveAndAnastasia said:

And very early this morning, mini-Dave was born

Ahhhh! I'm so excited for you guys! Congratulations! I hope it went as smoothly as it could possibly be!

[TBoneTX 45,155]

12 minutes ago, DaveAndAnastasia said:

fallopian chant

"Periods, hormones, rah rah rah!" man.

13 minutes ago, DaveAndAnastasia said:

he was due in Many days

Due-date corrected, si and  DA man.

11 minutes ago, Oliversmom said:

very early this morning, mini-Dave was born.

You're the ancestor of a descendant an income-tax deduction,  DA man!

And what time*, huh DA man?  And how many lbs*/oz*, huh DA man?

     *in strictest P-math, watch it DA man

13 minutes ago, Oliversmom said:

I'm home alone for the night

And you won't sleep for the next Many (2+1) years, no zzz DA man.

17 minutes ago, DaveAndAnastasia said:

pull-out couch in postpartum room

You're a chicken, si DA man.  Should've stayed, si DA man.

OB-GYN doc observed to us that, Many% of the time, it's the father who look like he's given birth, next morning man.

[TBoneTX 45,155]

9 minutes ago, Ontarkie said:

I ended up sending him home

See below, see ma'am:

9 minutes ago, Ontarkie said:

It was better for me I got more sleep with him gone

Imperious authoritarian Ontarklar!  Imperious, IMPERIOUS authoritarian AUTHORITARIAN Ontarklar!

[rrobin0609 387]

11 minutes ago, Oliversmom said:

I am sitting here tired of my hair.  It has been forever since I had a haircut and it is driving me crazy.  I am someone who can not stand the feel of long hair.  So I am debating whether to have my husband cut it.  Does he have any experience?  No.  Is he trained?  No.  Has he ever cut anyone's hair?  No.  I asked him and he said "I can try".  What do you think?  Should I go for it?

I haven't had my hair cut since September. Back in January I started thinking about getting it done, but my hairdresser shut her salon for a few weeks to do a remodel since she bought the building. So I figured I'd push it off until April/May so it wasn't a crazy mane of hair but also not cut so recently that it looks too staged when baby is born in June and everyone is taking pictures of us. Clearly that plan worked out 🙄

 

Unless you're super particular about your hair cuts (I am), you should let him try out a trim. Maybe start with half an inch and if he does okay go with a little bit more, and then a little more with each pass. If he can trim it up it might be less annoying for you.

[TBoneTX 45,155]

20 minutes ago, Oliversmom said:

It has been forever since I had a haircut

Didn't you have all your hairs cut, huh OM ma'am?

21 minutes ago, Oliversmom said:

Should I go for it?

Have him give you a haircut, then inspect his work, then have him give you another haircut, then inspect his work, and continue hair-by-hair until all your hairs are cut, si OM ma'am.

22 minutes ago, Oliversmom said:

Is he trained?  No.

What kind of wife doesn't train her husband thoroughly, huh man?  

[rrobin0609 387]

@TBoneTX I saw this today and I was wondering if Garbage Math and P-Math follow the same rules...

 

https://xkcd.com/2295/

[Lil bear 4,171]

3 minutes ago, rrobin0609 said:

@TBoneTX I saw this today and I was wondering if Garbage Math and P-Math follow the same rules...

 

https://xkcd.com/2295/

It looks about as useful and understandable as the extremely obtuse method that was trying to be taught to my 1st grade grandson as an alternative way of adding 2 digit numbers .. he was looking blankly at the video screen and the maths problem .. and for good reason.. it was a technique that those who are intuitive math learners would work out on their own ., but seems gobbledegook to most of us .. I  filled in the answer just so he could move on to the next question. Aaaarrrrgggghhhhh!!! 

[TBoneTX 45,155]

24 minutes ago, rrobin0609 said:

I was wondering if Garbage Math and P-Math follow the same rules

No no no no NO, RR ma'am!       

P-Math is a highly elegant and flexible system, see RR ma'am.

It has the defined values of 0, 1, 2, and Many, basic review RR ma'am.

It can express anything that anyone wants, see RR ma'am.

Garbage is exactly that, see RR ma'am.

Let us not hear further blasphemy of this type from your keyboard again*, no RR ma'am!

    *or risk the wrath of the fearsome Asia**, si RR ma'am.

       ** Fearsome wrathful Asia!  Fearsome, FEARSOME wrathful WRATHFUL Asia!

 

Edited to add:  yours was the Last Post on Page (LPoP) and therefore unread, sorry RR ma'am.

Edited April 18, 2020 by TBoneTX

[TBoneTX 45,155]

14 minutes ago, Lil bear said:

a technique that those who are intuitive math learners would work out on their own

You have just described the elegant system of P-math, si LB ma'am.