Rante Macabre

[Ontarkie 14,218]

On 1/16/2021 at 9:23 PM, Cyberfx1024 said:

So we were having a decent day today getting everything ready for my youngest daughter's birthday tomorrow and the kids just got done doing a balloon arch. When my 7 year old was sliding around the hardwood floors on her socks when she fell and broke her permanent tooth on the floor. Luckily the break didn't affect the nerve in the tooth but we will have to go in for a emergency appointment on Monday morning. My wife is devastated right now because she has worked so hard to take care of her teeth. 

 

Oh no poor girl. Hopefully the dentist won't be too bad.

 

23 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Thrilling non-GS/ES Saturday report, see man:

 

Awoke with hip feeling great, hip individual we man.

Awoke with wrist partially unusable, case of awristed development man.

 

Mini-B.'s last full day of being Many years old, no more single digits man.

Dropped Mini-B. with Ex-Mrs.-T-B. for the morning, her request man.

 

Lunched at McDonald's (in the T-B.-mobile), before we fell over man.

Never again will we patronize a place with closed dine-in facilities, forget it man.

 

Retrieved Mini-B., Two Guys man.

Napped like a dead thing, zzz we man.

Awoke with wrist nearly unusable, mobilize aspirin and all icepacks man.

 

Took Mini-B. out for pre-birthday din-din, intend to ingest we and wee man.

Red Lobster apparently out of business, building completely deidentified man.

Chili's ignored us in entry lobby for a full Many (2+1) minutes, they can stuff it man.

IHOP gave Mini-B. a free short stack of Many (2+1) pancakes, pleased we and wee man.

 

Bedded Mini-B. with story about our Many'th birthday, famous day in U.S. history man.

Transported miu to big brother's bed, sleep again miu with wee man.

Note to self, self-note man:  immediately buy and mobilize more icepacks, urgent man.

 

Must transport load of Mini-B.'s presents downstairs, delivered by Birthday Claus man.

Happy Birthday to Min-B

 

17 hours ago, NikLR said:

Maybe it’s the gluten? Have you tried non gluten pasta in the past?  I agree that trying things one at a time would be best though. You don’t know if it was the potato or the pasta (I’m assuming not the cheese?) 

Na it's not the gluten. I'm outright allergic to grains. I'm just sucker for punishment. 

 

17 hours ago, NikLR said:

Got promoted to store manager. Yay. Worked 57 hours last week. Not yay.  We had a floor cleaning and since I couldn’t add hours to my schedule that was already posted it was me who stayed. After I already worked a full shift. By 230am I was feeling the waxing fumes and was so tired. I fell off my diet and ate candy. Perked me up enough to last the next 45 mins.  Found out the CSM took the truck keys home and didn’t put the club on the work truck. Technically a write up offense so next day I worked he seemed really subdued.  I’m going to make a memo but not write him up because this change to management has been difficult for him. Especially now that his favorite Barbie is sick. Getting him to use other drivers is difficult so I’ll need to do some hiring. Just need to get through inventory next week and the massive planograms. Got all the recalls done. Just need to fix up one more planogram and then make sure the store is perfectly labeled and organized by Monday night. 

Another promotion? Congratulations. That's rough though. 

 

5 hours ago, SAT said:

My upstate neighbor died. Went to the funeral, a graveside service, in the snow. 

You guys ever been to a Jewish funeral? They're very long...

Oh man that sucks. I've only been to Catholic funerals they are long enough. 

[TBoneTX 45,266]

9 minutes ago, Ontarkie said:

I'm just sucker for punishment

Punishment-sucking Ontarklar!  Punishment-sucking, PUNISHMENT-SUCKING Ontarklar!

(uh, or something, whatever man...)

[TBoneTX 45,266]

Thrilling Sunday report, see man:

 

Mini-B.'s Many'th birthday, up-growing wee man.

 

Awoke with no hip pain, pain not hip man.

Wrist slightly less swollen and almost usable, awristed development man.

 

Showed Mini-B. the Many pants/shirts bought at Sears closedown last weekend, well-clothed wee man.

Gave Mini-B. b'day cards from us and New Miu, thoroughly carded wee man.

Gave Mini-B. his first Many (2+2) presents, unwrap-artist wee man.

Mini-B. especially impressed with Spider-Man shirt* and electric sharpen-penciler, happy wee man.

       *bought for $1 at a GS last weekend, discerning we man

 

Prepped for party at and turnover of Mini-B. to Ex-Mrs.-T-B., that time man.

Collected Mama T-B. and caravaned to party, Many (2+1) generations in T-B.-mobile man.

 

Ex-Mrs.-T-B. had wonderful party set up, typical of she man.

Minecraft-themed cake specially prepared by one of her amigas, bakeress she man.

Mini-B. lit and out-blew candles, successful blowout man.

Gave Mini-B. his remaining Many (2+1) presents, Minecraft shirt & pants among them man.

Ex-Mrs.-T-B. gave Mini-B. his gaming system & monitor, bought by both of u$ man.

 

Said "We're Two Guys" mantra with Mini-B. and shared belly-bump, traditional Guy Stuff man.

Said goodbye too many hours early, Ex-Mrs.-T-B. had external plans with Mini-B. man.

Returned Mama T-B., return we senior she man.

 

At casa, subdued Many (2+1) laundry loads, heavy week man.

Picked shirts/ties for week at POTS office, Business Typhoon we man.

Took semisuccessful nap while lying on bad hip, much-improved zzz man.

Observed miu asleep for several hours on Mini-B.'s bed, hope it becomes habit for miu man.

Watched AFV without Mini-B., solo tradition this time man.

Made first Many lunches for week at POTS office, Business Typhoon we man.

Dished the warsher*, now Sundays not Saturdays man.

       *so much easier when WE control what gets left in the sink

 

Found miu asleep on our office chair, miu zzz man.

Attempted to relocate miu, never disturb a sleeping miu man.

Miu objected and demonstrated need for manicure on chair, call leather repairman man.

Miu later jumped on desk to doze on our keyboard, revenge is miu's man.

 

Developed POTS $ale$ $pecial$, order yours at handsome 0.0000001% discount man.

Must de-dish the warsher, not much volume or work man.

Shall again take Heap Strong Medicine in hopes of wresting back our wrist, wrest wrist we man.

Then miu prep zzz, si man.

[trudi 1,317]

Belated happy birthday to Mini TB 🎉

[NikLR 13,227]

12 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Loftily elevated Niki-B. ma'am!  Loftily elevated, LOFTILY ELEVATED Niki-B. ma'am!

The mantle of leadership is a heavy one, si Niki-B. ma'am.

Survival is predicated on delegating everything except that which only you can do, si ma'am.

And could not the clean-flooring have waited another night, huh ma'am?

No it couldn’t. Our store has a schedule for the cleaning and this was my week. Only I am salary and can cover extra hours

[NikLR 13,227]

Happy double digit birthday miniTb

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

On 1/17/2021 at 6:45 AM, NikLR said:

Got promoted to store manager. Yay. Worked 57 hours last week. Not yay.  We had a floor cleaning and since I couldn’t add hours to my schedule that was already posted it was me who stayed. 

Is it worth it when you break down your salary into hourly pay?  We recently had a salaried supervisor position open up and all but 1 of my coworkers refused to apply because their yearly pay would have taken a hard hit. 

[NikLR 13,227]

8 hours ago, N-o-l-a said:

Is it worth it when you break down your salary into hourly pay?  We recently had a salaried supervisor position open up and all but 1 of my coworkers refused to apply because their yearly pay would have taken a hard hit. 

Yeah it does. Up about $3/hr plus bonuses. 

[NikLR 13,227]

Had I already been working 50 hrs a week like I was supposed to it wouldn’t have been as much of a raise (minus bonuses). 
bonuses are paid out quarterly which is nice and I’ll get more after we get rid of four commercial area. It doesn’t make the minimum for me to bonus so I bonus on retail only. 

[TBoneTX 45,266]

You could have been making far more all along in the Pre-Owned Toilet Seat industry, si Niki-B. ma'am.

Perform well in what you're doing and perhaps we'll consider you on a special basis, $$$$$i ma'am.

[TBoneTX 45,266]

We are SO glad that this dreary thread has only Many (2x2x2) pages left, can't close soon enough man.

And this time, it is (long past) OUR turn to name the new thread, have peppier/happier name for it man.

[TBoneTX 45,266]

Thrilling Monday report, see man:

 

We had Many (2+1) bananas that were rapidly approaching end-of-life, getting mushy man.

As a cheap gringo, we were reluctant to out-throw them, kids are starving in Africa man.

We put them on a styrofoam plate and up-sliced them with a knife, slice-&-dice we man.

We poured maple pancake syrup atop the slices, goopy man.

This became our delectable and quite filling din-din, ingest we man.

We are proud of our ingenious thriftiness, proficient Business Typhoon we man.

[TBoneTX 45,266]

Scintillating repartee this morning, yawn man.

And yawn man anyway, because it's morning, yawn anyway man.

 

Thrilling Tues.-morn report, yawn and see man:

1.  Miu raced and jumped around like a wildmiu, wild miu man.

2.  Absent Asia!  Absent, ABSENT Asia!

[Ontarkie 14,218]

23 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

We are SO glad that this dreary thread has only Many (2x2x2) pages left, can't close soon enough man.

And this time, it is (long past) OUR turn to name the new thread, have peppier/happier name for it man.

You know it's only your turn if the thread creator allows it  

 

23 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

Thrilling Monday report, see man:

 

We had Many (2+1) bananas that were rapidly approaching end-of-life, getting mushy man.

As a cheap gringo, we were reluctant to out-throw them, kids are starving in Africa man.

We put them on a styrofoam plate and up-sliced them with a knife, slice-&-dice we man.

We poured maple pancake syrup atop the slices, goopy man.

This became our delectable and quite filling din-din, ingest we man.

We are proud of our ingenious thriftiness, proficient Business Typhoon we man.

That is the perfect time to make banana bread. 

[TBoneTX 45,266]

Just now, Ontarkie said:

You know it's only your turn if the thread creator allows it  

He has colluded with you in the past, si D ma'am.   

Bad collusive Ontarklar!  Bad, BAD collusive COLLUSIVE Ontarklar!