Recipes / British Election [split dual topic]

[luckytxn 2,265]

2 hours ago, Burnt Reynolds said:

Why not? Got the wife (who does all the cooking) an InstantPot 8-quart like 3 or 4 years ago (was an extremely good deal), and she's absolutely loved it, so much so that she demanded we get their new blender (deal or not) they came out with on our last US trip. I'd recommend, on behalf of the wife.. not my own, I'm not the type of person you want in a kitchen cooking. 

Because I want it as a present and want her to buy it. She is stingy and won't do it but I cook most of the dishes now and she could care less how I do it.

[Burnt Reynolds 5,058]

24 minutes ago, luckytxn said:

Because I want it as a present and want her to buy it. She is stingy and won't do it but I cook most of the dishes now and she could care less how I do it.

You should buy one, wrap it up, and make it out to you from her, and open it on Christmas and pretend to be all excited. 😎

[luckytxn 2,265]

2 hours ago, Burnt Reynolds said:

You should buy one, wrap it up, and make it out to you from her, and open it on Christmas and pretend to be all excited. 😎

No with her I need to guilt trip her out until she gets it and hands it to me. She will give in eventually.

[Dashinka 24,747]

9 hours ago, luckytxn said:

No with her I need to guilt trip her out until she gets it and hands it to me. She will give in eventually.

I was a terrible person to shop for at Christmas time.  My mother always would request a list, and eventually sometime in mid-November I would give her two or three ideas.  She would ask me don’t I want anything else, my response was always when I want something, I go out and buy it.  Of course that was back in my single days, now my wife has that burden.  😀

[Burnt Reynolds 5,058]

23 minutes ago, Bill & Katya said:

I was a terrible person to shop for at Christmas time.  My mother always would request a list, and eventually sometime in mid-November I would give her two or three ideas.  She would ask me don’t I want anything else, my response was always when I want something, I go out and buy it.  Of course that was back in my single days, now my wife has that burden.  😀

Yes! It's difficult if you're the consumerist/breadwinner who actively seizes on deals and doesn't like overpaying for the things you want. I don't get pleasure in having a product if I (or someone else, but mostly me since its mostly my money that's being spent) got ripped off. Also its a thing that comes with age, you tend to be the gift giver and spend your time figuring out what others want. After about 10 years of marriage, wife's birthday weeks ago was the first time I didn't get her an "item", but rather "services", so a mani-pedi-nail service, but she didn't have any preferred place in this town. The way my consumerist brain works, I looked at reviews, our amazon history (to figure out what kind of nails she liked because she had ordered some nail stuff before that she does our daughters nails and her own with) and figured it would be simple. But I found at work, university, in every building I went into to ask random women, every single woman had different salons, different views, etc., and I soon realized it was abso-***ing-lutely impossible to figure this out. Eventually, I settled on this place nearby that turned out great (the biggest similarity turned out to be that people went with what was close to their residence), although because my wife is Asian and they were Asian there was this bit of uncomfortable ogling at me.

 

It's just so much better to get presents for other people.

Edited December 20, 2019 by Burnt Reynolds

[luckytxn 2,265]

3 hours ago, Bill & Katya said:

I was a terrible person to shop for at Christmas time.  My mother always would request a list, and eventually sometime in mid-November I would give her two or three ideas.  She would ask me don’t I want anything else, my response was always when I want something, I go out and buy it.  Of course that was back in my single days, now my wife has that burden.  😀

Here is the deal. My wife and I are foodies and love great tasting meals. I do about 90% of all the cooking and she wants me to cook great tasting foods and to do that I need equipment and she hates spending money. We go out once a week at least and try different places and foods and sometimes she says "we need to make this at home" (meaning me) I have to figure out what it is and the recipe and how to make it and do so. She will get me that instapot or I don't cook her faves anymore.

[laylalex 7,300]

Question for the men -- if there is something that I know Alex wants, and he has told me not to get it for him because he doesn't want me spending my "blood money" (his term for my support payments) on him, should I go ahead and get it for him anyway under the fiction that it's actually my wages paying for the thing? I mean, when I get the support payments, half is wired into my checking account and the rest into another account I use to fund investments. My wages go into the checking account too, so the money is mingled. Is it stretching it too much to say, okay, $XXXXXX I spent on this present was all from my wages? I know he would like this object a lot, and I can afford it no problem. He's had a number of huge outgoings this month, and he won't know what his bonus is until next week (and a chunk of that is earmarked for other things, including much-needed repairs to his family home abroad). Would I just be inviting drama if I went ahead and did it anyway?

[Nature Boy 2.0 8,378]

Just now, laylalex said:

Question for the men -- if there is something that I know Alex wants, and he has told me not to get it for him because he doesn't want me spending my "blood money" (his term for my support payments) on him, should I go ahead and get it for him anyway under the fiction that it's actually my wages paying for the thing? I mean, when I get the support payments, half is wired into my checking account and the rest into another account I use to fund investments. My wages go into the checking account too, so the money is mingled. Is it stretching it too much to say, okay, $XXXXXX I spent on this present was all from my wages? I know he would like this object a lot, and I can afford it no problem. He's had a number of huge outgoings this month, and he won't know what his bonus is until next week (and a chunk of that is earmarked for other things, including much-needed repairs to his family home abroad). Would I just be inviting drama if I went ahead and did it anyway?

Alex is a lucky man

[laylalex 7,300]

Just now, Nature Boy 2.0 said:

Alex is a lucky man

I will remind him!  

[Boiler 45,979]

https://www.bbc.com/news/av/world-us-canada-50864158/democratic-debate-warren-and-buttigieg-clash-over-wine-cave-fundraiser

 

The wine cave

 

I side with Alex btw

[laylalex 7,300]

2 minutes ago, Boiler said:

https://www.bbc.com/news/av/world-us-canada-50864158/democratic-debate-warren-and-buttigieg-clash-over-wine-cave-fundraiser

 

The wine cave

 

I side with Alex btw

I think I should have a wine cave when we finally buy a place. 

 

Thank you for the advice -- sometimes I don't think about the money so much. He has more monthly income than me, but I have more capital. I don't like touching the capital very much, and try to add to it as much as possible by living frugally. I do splurge on stuff, but mostly we eat in a lot, aren't jetting off for foreign vacations all the time, and I hate wasting money on more home than I need. We could have had a much bigger place in Santa Monica in a far fancier building with every amenity you could imagine (like my ex, whose building has a pet spa and a yoga terrace), but I would rather be reasonable. BUT... I have money, and what is the point of having it without spending it? He has so much allocated towards family obligations that have nothing to do with me, and I only have me and him (to the extent that he will let me). On the other hand, I don't want him to feel emasculated, like heyyyyyyyyyyy, I have all this money that comes from a source you aren't crazy about and now I'm going to spend it on you because you can't afford luxuries to spend on yourself? 

 

I overthink things, btw.

[luckytxn 2,265]

45 minutes ago, laylalex said:

Question for the men -- if there is something that I know Alex wants, and he has told me not to get it for him because he doesn't want me spending my "blood money" (his term for my support payments) on him, should I go ahead and get it for him anyway under the fiction that it's actually my wages paying for the thing? I mean, when I get the support payments, half is wired into my checking account and the rest into another account I use to fund investments. My wages go into the checking account too, so the money is mingled. Is it stretching it too much to say, okay, $XXXXXX I spent on this present was all from my wages? I know he would like this object a lot, and I can afford it no problem. He's had a number of huge outgoings this month, and he won't know what his bonus is until next week (and a chunk of that is earmarked for other things, including much-needed repairs to his family home abroad). Would I just be inviting drama if I went ahead and did it anyway?

Do what my wife does and get it anyway and give it to him whether he wants it or not. Once you marry him he is caught and enslaved anyway.

[laylalex 7,300]

10 minutes ago, luckytxn said:

Do what my wife does and get it anyway and give it to him whether he wants it or not. Once you marry him he is caught and enslaved anyway.

I wish I had a combo Haha and Thanks reaction for this.  

 

He says he is already basically a slave and has been for some time now.  I try not to be a harsh mistress.

[Boiler 45,979]

Mistress's are not around at Christmas

[luckytxn 2,265]

13 minutes ago, laylalex said:

I wish I had a combo Haha and Thanks reaction for this.  

 

He says he is already basically a slave and has been for some time now.  I try not to be a harsh mistress.

I figured he was since you said you were marrying him. Hook him he is done.