Dating A Democrat: How 2020’s Presidential Election Has Altered Romance in D.C.

[Boris Farage 353]

2 minutes ago, laylalex said:

Sorry if I'm a little grouchy, the sun's in my eyes out here and it's hard to see the laptop screen.

 

#laylalexworldproblems

 

[Boris Farage 353]

5 minutes ago, laylalex said:

I never said I wasn't a member of the Democratic Party. I think there's a difference between being "committed to the Democratic Party" and being a Democrat. I have voted for non-Democrats before. I am not laying down my life for the party. I just feel more closely aligned with the party than with, say, the Republicans or whomever.

What Republican have you voted for? Not city council or dog catcher, but a Republican running for a real office.

 

5 minutes ago, laylalex said:

So it was my fault I got duped by a narcissist when I was just a kid? Okay then. I own up now to the fact that I was naive, and that is taking responsibility for my actions because I learned from the experience.

Yes it's your fault. Every decision you make is your fault. If you had lived happily ever after with your ex, you wouldn't say it was his doing would you?

 

9 minutes ago, laylalex said:

I know that today I've got to go look at apartments on my own because my fiance got pulled into meetings he hadn't anticipated when we set up the viewings. It's better to show up, I think, on my own and honor the appointments than just say, oh, he can't do it so I can't do it. That's taking responsibility for your actions.

Your fiance has a lot of excuses to avoid spending time with you, doesn't he?

 

The only responsibility you're taking right now is your responsibility to enable his avoidance.

[laylalex 7,300]

5 minutes ago, Boris Farage said:

What Republican have you voted for? Not city council or dog catcher, but a Republican running for a real office.

I voted for Lincoln Chafee for US Senate in 2006. And yes, he was a Republican back then.

 

Your other comments about my personal life are not worth addressing, but I will say that we did NOT anticipate him having to go to these meetings -- the only reason we are here in Santa Monica today is to look at apartments, which he cleared with work. He's not happy having me have to shoulder all of the burden. It's not an excuse not to spend time with me; he has work to do. 

[Boris Farage 353]

5 minutes ago, laylalex said:

I voted for Lincoln Chafee for US Senate in 2006. And yes, he was a Republican back then.

A RINO you mean. If this is the best you can do, my point stands.

 

6 minutes ago, laylalex said:

Your other comments about my personal life are not worth addressing, but I will say that we did NOT anticipate him having to go to these meetings -- the only reason we are here in Santa Monica today is to look at apartments, which he cleared with work. He's not happy having me have to shoulder all of the burden. It's not an excuse not to spend time with me; he has work to do. 

Well, if you can actually think back to all the times he did or did not let you down like this, and you're happy with that history, then I have nothing more to add. I suspect, however, that upon reflection you will see a pattern.

[yuna628 9,700]

Dear lord you two... honestly. Why does EVERY thread need to be about this nonsense? 

 

[laylalex 7,300]

4 minutes ago, yuna628 said:

Dear lord you two... honestly. Why does EVERY thread need to be about this nonsense? 

 

Sorry, that IS funny.  

[Boris Farage 353]

6 minutes ago, laylalex said:

Sorry, that IS funny.  

The question is, would your ex find it funny?

[Burnt Reynolds 5,058]

1 hour ago, laylalex said:

I am not "committed to the Democratic Party" -- that was my ex-husband's view of me simply because I voted for Obama (twice). You're even newer here than I am, so I am sure you do not know what I have posted before about our relationship. It was not healthy. Our big differences in political philosophy were only symptomatic of the rot in our relationship. He manipulated me over the course of many years into losing touch with my own identity, which I am still healing from. If I had listened to my mother and my close friends (many of whom had strong reservations about our relationship, including the man who is now my fiance), I might not have gone through what I did. Their perceptions were based not on his identity, but on how he treated me. But I was very young and certain I was right, and love does weird things to the brain, particularly when your prefrontal cortex isn't fully formed yet. 

Understood.

 

But, the reflexive response to situations like these is to go irrationally from one end of the reactive spectrum to the other. Which is no less unwise. I personally encounter this all the time, and your post looks like this as well from what I read.

 

As someone who has been burned too before, I'm saying the logic you're applying is not necessary, and in many ways, basically asking for you to get burned again. You can rely on advice from the people you find were 1) there for you during hard times [and where you may have been acting stupidly in a way that potentially alienating to the relationship].. we've all been there before, 2) were simply giving the most applicable/logical/objective advice. This is not illogical at all.

 

Rather, the point is, taking advice from people (whether close/trustworthy or not) and not allowing them to assess people's characters for you aren't mutually exclusive options. 

 

I will also add that the logic espoused is also a defense mechanism that may actually prevent you from taking what might have been applicable criticism. Just because Person A did bad things to you/is bad doesn't mean the opposite of what they say is inherently correct. Many of the best things I learned, I learned from criticism I received from those who I find to be human trash. But again, this is yet another example of why we look at arguments and not identity. 

Edited November 18, 2019 by Burnt Reynolds

[laylalex 7,300]

1 hour ago, Boris Farage said:

The question is, would your ex find it funny?

Does it matter? (And yes, I know I'm not letting it go. ) 

 

Back to topic (because seriously, enough about me), I've always found the Mary Matalin-James Carville marriage interesting -- they apparently don't talk about politics at home. Imagine that kind of restraint, when both of you have jobs in that field! But it goes to show that when your core values align, much of the other stuff is just irrelevant. 

[Boiler 45,980]

Many Obama voters then voted for Trump.

[laylalex 7,300]

1 minute ago, Boiler said:

Many Obama voters then voted for Trump.

People can change their minds. I voted for Chafee for US Senator but would not have voted for him in the 2016 primary if he had still been on the ticket.

[90DayFinancier 910]

15 minutes ago, Boiler said:

Many Obama voters then voted for Trump.

This is true, and if the Democratic nominee doesn't crack that code they will again.  And by crack that code meaning visit  those areas at least once. 

[Boiler 45,980]

1 minute ago, 90DayFinancier said:

This is true, and if the Democratic nominee doesn't crack that code they will again.  And by crack that code meaning visit  those areas at least once. 

Even of it is their turn?

[90DayFinancier 910]

5 minutes ago, Boiler said:

Even of it is their turn?

Yes, average Joe's won't care about who thinks it's there turn.

Where I am going  with this is the last election had several factors, but the Campaign Management bordered on malpractice and it played large in the outcome.

 

Edited November 19, 2019 by 90DayFinancier

[Boris Farage 353]

7 minutes ago, 90DayFinancier said:

This is true, and if the Democratic nominee doesn't crack that code they will again.  And by crack that code meaning visit  those areas at least once. 

That might have been possible at one time. But you can thank Nancy for crushing any of those dreams. The American people are so turned off of the Democrat Party now that Mr. Trump will cruise to a win very handily. Very likely with even more electoral votes than previously.

 

Also, it was brought to my attention recently that many states don't actually require their electoral college delegates to vote based on the popular vote of their state. It would not surprise me at all to see some electoral college delegates go against the wishes of their blue state to pad Mr. Trump's victory.