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laylalex

Halloween 2019’s most controversial costume ideas, from ‘Miss Impeachment' to child brides

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Just for a cerian mod.

 

A man is walking home alone late one foggy Halloween night, when behind him he hears: 
BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... 
Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.

BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... 
Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him. 
FASTER... FASTER... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP.... 
He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him. However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping. 
clappity-BUMP...clappity-BUMP... clappity-BUMP...
on his heels, as the terrified man runs.

Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, he locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.

With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door. 
Bumping and clapping toward him. 
The man screams and reaches for something, anything!

The first thing he sees is a bottle of cough syrup on the counter.

Desperate, he grabs it and throws the cough syrup at the coffin ...

It smashes against the coffin.

...and...of...course,

...the coffin stops!

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1 hour ago, Nature Boy 2.0 said:

Just for a cerian mod.

 

A man is walking home alone late one foggy Halloween night, when behind him he hears: 
BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... 
Walking faster, he looks back and through the fog he makes out the image of an upright casket banging its way down the middle of the street toward him.

BUMP... BUMP... BUMP... 
Terrified, the man begins to run toward his home, the casket bouncing quickly behind him. 
FASTER... FASTER... BUMP... BUMP... BUMP.... 
He runs up to his door, fumbles with his keys, opens the door, rushes in, slams and locks the door behind him. However, the casket crashes through his door, with the lid of the casket clapping. 
clappity-BUMP...clappity-BUMP... clappity-BUMP...
on his heels, as the terrified man runs.

Rushing upstairs to the bathroom, he locks himself in. His heart is pounding; his head is reeling; his breath is coming in sobbing gasps.

With a loud CRASH the casket breaks down the door. 
Bumping and clapping toward him. 
The man screams and reaches for something, anything!

The first thing he sees is a bottle of cough syrup on the counter.

Desperate, he grabs it and throws the cough syrup at the coffin ...

It smashes against the coffin.

...and...of...course,

...the coffin stops!

GROAN 

 

This is like the Daddiest of Dad Jokes. 🙄

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2 minutes ago, ALFKAD said:

Without a daddy, there would be no you.  Don't hate!

It's true! And I do love my dad, even if he has morphed into a Trump supporter after years of being one of the most liberal people I know. But his dad jokes really are terrible, and wonderful because they are his and I love him no matter how much I disagree with him politically. ❤️

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40 minutes ago, laylalex said:

It's true! And I do love my dad, even if he has morphed into a Trump supporter after years of being one of the most liberal people I know. But his dad jokes really are terrible, and wonderful because they are his and I love him no matter how much I disagree with him politically. ❤️

Here’s a life lesson for you, unsolicited, free of charge, and one I am quite sure you will ignore for at least another 20 years...

 

Your dad is very smart.  Life has taught him lessons.  He will TRY to pass them on to you, but like most youth (myself included, back in the day) you will not listen until it is too late.

 

The fact that your father changed stances after being such a devout liberal SHOULD tell you something.  I’d post a huge JPG of red flags, but Boris has already worn that one out.

 

Just an outside observation.  Oh, and it’s ok to punch a nazi in the face.  Duh!

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42 minutes ago, laylalex said:

It's true! And I do love my dad, even if he has morphed into a Trump supporter after years of being one of the most liberal people I know. But his dad jokes really are terrible, and wonderful because they are his and I love him no matter how much I disagree with him politically. ❤️

FatherKnowsBest_PA_2450x1100_13646894757

* ~ * Charles * ~ *
 

I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.

 

USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

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23 hours ago, ALFKAD said:

Here’s a life lesson for you, unsolicited, free of charge, and one I am quite sure you will ignore for at least another 20 years...

 

Your dad is very smart.  Life has taught him lessons.  He will TRY to pass them on to you, but like most youth (myself included, back in the day) you will not listen until it is too late.

 

The fact that your father changed stances after being such a devout liberal SHOULD tell you something.  I’d post a huge JPG of red flags, but Boris has already worn that one out.

 

Just an outside observation.  Oh, and it’s ok to punch a nazi in the face.  Duh!

I meant to reply to this yesterday (and thought I did) -- my dad's shift rightward started when he and my ex started spending more time together (back when I was married). I had encouraged the relationship because my husband sometimes felt a little adrift and was still trying to build a network of friends here. So they started going to Dodgers games together (and still do), and talking on the phone sometimes (and still do), and whatnot. It was gradual. My ex plugged him into another network of more conservative people, and my dad has gotten a lot of work from them so... yeah. It sort of reinforces itself. My mom is not impressed. She confided in me that she's thought about divorcing him because he's impossible to be around, trying to "convert" her and alienating their mutual friends, but it's just too much hassle at 64 years old. Instead he just stays in his study with Fox News on all the time and she does her own thing when they're at home together.

 

My fiance and I are generally aligned politically, although I tend to be a little more fiscally conservative than he is. Our one real disagreement is over capital punishment. Strangely, even though he's from a country where it's illegal and I'm from a country where it is (in many places), he is okay with it for really depraved murders, and I am completely against it. Always have been. We are not going to agree on this, ever, so we respect the fact that the other is wrong. :D 

 

23 hours ago, Ban Hammer said:

FatherKnowsBest_PA_2450x1100_13646894757

He thinks he does! The jury's out for the rest of the family... :D 

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3 minutes ago, laylalex said:

I meant to reply to this yesterday (and thought I did) -- my dad's shift rightward started when he and my ex started spending more time together (back when I was married). I had encouraged the relationship because my husband sometimes felt a little adrift and was still trying to build a network of friends here. So they started going to Dodgers games together (and still do), and talking on the phone sometimes (and still do), and whatnot. It was gradual. My ex plugged him into another network of more conservative people, and my dad has gotten a lot of work from them so... yeah. It sort of reinforces itself. My mom is not impressed. She confided in me that she's thought about divorcing him because he's impossible to be around, trying to "convert" her and alienating their mutual friends, but it's just too much hassle at 64 years old. Instead he just stays in his study with Fox News on all the time and she does her own thing when they're at home together.

 

My fiance and I are generally aligned politically, although I tend to be a little more fiscally conservative than he is. Our one real disagreement is over capital punishment. Strangely, even though he's from a country where it's illegal and I'm from a country where it is (in many places), he is okay with it for really depraved murders, and I am completely against it. Always have been. We are not going to agree on this, ever, so we respect the fact that the other is wrong. :D 

 

He thinks he does! The jury's out for the rest of the family... :D 

Yes, many of those on the Left can be very intolerant of opposing views.  I have a good friend who is very moderate politically, she has a friend who is a radical Leftist, if you do not agree with the political views of the Leftist, they go nuts.

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1 minute ago, Bill & Katya said:

Yes, many of those on the Left can be very intolerant of opposing views.  I have a good friend who is very moderate politically, she has a friend who is a radical Leftist, if you do not agree with the political views of the Leftist, they go nuts.

Um, where did I say it was only people on the left who were their mutual friends, or that only they were intolerant? He has alienated friends who aren't politically active at all, even apolitical or middle of the road or old school Republican. And he has been intolerant of what his friends who are on the left have to say. These are friends who he's had for 30, 40, 50 years in some cases. It would be one thing if my dad were able to take the attitude I have which is, okay, we're never going to agree on X, and that's fine because I love you. But he will not stop telling people that they're wrong and trying to basically proselytize what he sees as the "truth." My mom said there's none so zealous as a new convert, and I kind of think that's what we've got with my dad. When someone tells you, you know, I think you're wrong, but let's just have our barbecue or watch this football game or play this round of golf, and then you go ahead and keep making comments about witch hunts? Just rude. I'm embarrassed for him, because I love him.

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54 minutes ago, Bill & Katya said:

Yes, many of those on the Left can be very intolerant of opposing views.  I have a good friend who is very moderate politically, she has a friend who is a radical Leftist, if you do not agree with the political views of the Leftist, they go nuts.

You should pick your friends of friends more carefully.

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54 minutes ago, 90DayFinancier said:

You should pick your friends of friends more carefully.

Yeah, I tend to avoid this person as much as possible, and when I do have to be in contact with her, certainly simply nod and stay silent.

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1 hour ago, laylalex said:

Um, where did I say it was only people on the left who were their mutual friends, or that only they were intolerant? He has alienated friends who aren't politically active at all, even apolitical or middle of the road or old school Republican. And he has been intolerant of what his friends who are on the left have to say. These are friends who he's had for 30, 40, 50 years in some cases. It would be one thing if my dad were able to take the attitude I have which is, okay, we're never going to agree on X, and that's fine because I love you. But he will not stop telling people that they're wrong and trying to basically proselytize what he sees as the "truth." My mom said there's none so zealous as a new convert, and I kind of think that's what we've got with my dad. When someone tells you, you know, I think you're wrong, but let's just have our barbecue or watch this football game or play this round of golf, and then you go ahead and keep making comments about witch hunts? Just rude. I'm embarrassed for him, because I love him.

Fair enough.  When I saw your post, I was reminded of the friend of the friend I mentioned.  Apologies, but it has been my experience that those on the political Left (again, not Liberal) are very intolerant to opposing views.

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3 hours ago, Bill & Katya said:

Yes, many of those on the Left can be very intolerant of opposing views.  I have a good friend who is very moderate politically, she has a friend who is a radical Leftist, if you do not agree with the political views of the Leftist, they go nuts.

Fairly typical of most of the MDL. I will dd the Religious right can be intolerant at times. Especially the more pentecostal evangelical of them.

 

Of course being the only middle of the road guy here, I tend to see extremes more easily than the MDL and MDR

 

 

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't wipe your friends on the furniture.

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09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

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05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

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08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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