Abandoning AOS before it gets approved!

[geowrian 22,337]

Nothing about abuse has been indicated. It sounds like she just wants to go home. Maybe it's not working out with her new spouse? Maybe she's homesick?

So long as she knows the consequences (she needs a new visa to return) and it's not just a temporary thing, that's all there is to it.

Personally, I'd try to find out why she wants to disappear...if it's a medical issue, then she needs help. if she is being abused, she needs to seek safety.

Nobody from immigration is going to come after her. There's no reason for them to even care if she no longer wants to continue with her application. She can even get a new visa later, if she is eligible. The US doesn't hold personal grudges.

Edited October 26, 2019 by geowrian

[Cndn 98]

8 hours ago, Villanelle said:

She can still file for VAWA from overseas. It might be best to simply help her leave the bad situation she is in and once she is back with family and can clear her head she can look into VAWA. The only other thing not mentioned is depending on how she entered the US (K or B) she may have overstay and be subject to a ban if she ever wanted to return to the US. 

Even if she married and filed for AOS it would still trigger a ban if she overstayed? 

[bakphx1 789]

If she’s in an abusive situation she may have been convinced she’s being watched/followed.  An abuser technique.  

 

She is free to leave, travel, no repercussions.  Her case just ends.

[Izor 79]

Book a ticket. Go home. It is that easy. 

[designguy 1,179]

2 hours ago, Cndn said:

Even if she married and filed for AOS it would still trigger a ban if she overstayed? 

If she filed for AOS prior to the date on the I-94 she would be in a period of authorized stay and would not have accumulated an overstay

[DakotaKid 38]

We really don't have a whole lot to base our advice on.  Speaking from personal experience, it was a really trying time the first couple of months for my wife.  Mind you, it wasn't the first time she had been away from her family.  The difference this time is she had children that are still back in Thailand with her parents.  She was incredibly homesick.  Thankfully, she was able to video chat with them on Facebook Messenger.  She was completely accepted most importantly by my family, and also my friends think she is wonderful.  I personally think that the waiting for the Combo Card was the most difficult.  While I was at work, she was basically stuck at home alone.  If she needed to go to the store or mall, I showed her how easy it was to walk down the street to the bus stop, and she could at least get out of the house.  She also was keen on me showing her how to mow the lawn.  She would take it upon herself to get the lawn mowed while I was at work.  Then after the snow started flying, she had me show her how to use the snowblower.  Then one day she sends me a picture of the snowblower by the garage door and asked. "How do I start this thing"?  I told her to wait until I got home, and I would show her how to get it running.  Imagine a 5'3" Thai girl having the driveway cleaned when you come home from work.  She was even willing to clean the elderly neighbor lady's driveway too.  I did make her save some work for me.

 

After getting her Combo Card, she went home for 4 weeks, and now has a job that she is thriving in.  She is doing so well that within a few months, she is now a lead.  After the trip home, her attitude is so much better.  She talks about becoming a citizen when the time comes.  We are in the planning stages of getting her teenage daughter and her pre-teen son here.  The daughter's father is a US citizen, but his name isn't on the birth certificate, so we are working on him doing what is needed to get her a US passport through CRBA.

[JeanneAdil 6,511]

so,  she has married and should see a lawyer to start a divorce (if she thinks to do that)  as it would be hard to do from out of the country

I would think after hiring one ,  she could leave and the lawyer would do the work

 

 her spouse here would have difficulties getting one if she just left and probably would not feel obliged to send her a copy of the divorce decree when he gets it

 

might be a good idea to talk to him of the issues and decide together

 

she could consider professional help for depression also or a marriage counselor before making any decision 

 

just giving up is not as easy when it affects everything you've worked for to get here

and this marriage would have to be dissolved to move on in the future

[Cndn 98]

9 hours ago, designguy said:

If she filed for AOS prior to the date on the I-94 she would be in a period of authorized stay and would not have accumulated an overstay

So if you overstay on a k visa but then eventually file for AOS and are granted AP the overstay is forgiven, but if you file AOS and then the marriage ends the overstay will be counted again? 

[geowrian 22,337]

2 hours ago, Cndn said:

So if you overstay on a k visa but then eventually file for AOS and are granted AP the overstay is forgiven, but if you file AOS and then the marriage ends the overstay will be counted again? 

That's one of the problems I have when people say overstay is forgiven. It is never forgiven - it will always exist. Overstay just is not a bar for AOS purposes as the spouse of a USC, and it will not incur a bar upon exit from the US with valid AP when they return (legally, it is not considered a "departure" per Matter of Arrabally). So it usually will not be an issue.

 

Being married or not is not a factor with overstay.

 

Unlawful presence begins accruing on day 1 after the I-94. It is then tolled (paused) while you have a pending AOS case. If denied, it starts accruing again from where it left off.

 

The first bar (3 years) is at 180 days of unlawful presence. The next is a 10 year bar and begins at 1 year of unlawful presence.

[CrisBR 30]

On 10/25/2019 at 12:59 PM, Mazzie said:

Hey people! 

Someone asked me this million dollar question: what if I just abandon my AOS and go back to my country?

since I have no clue, I’d like to share her agony with you and see how we could help.

I think she regrets her decision and just wants to disappear. I’m very sorry for her, by the way. She has lost a lot of weight and is getting into depression. 

Hello there! Like someone here said, sometimes life can be harder in the US for awhile. It takes time to establish and she may be depressed because she is basically home sick.

As for her decision to go back to her country, she can do it anytime. If her AOS is still pending, she is authorized to stay. If she gets an interview scheduled and never shows up, then I believe this is the moment she may be considered out of status if she doesn’t leave immediately. 

If she has any intention to get a tourist visa (maybe) in the future, it’s a good idea to keep all those notices of action in a safe place. I suppose she will probably be asked about this K Visa she got and the reason she decided to abandon her AOS process, so, it’s always a good idea to keep record of everything. Best of luck for your friend. I hope she gets better and decides what’s best for her in no time. 

[Cndn 98]

51 minutes ago, geowrian said:

That's one of the problems I have when people say overstay is forgiven. It is never forgiven - it will always exist. Overstay just is not a bar for AOS purposes as the spouse of a USC, and it will not incur a bar upon exit from the US with valid AP when they return (legally, it is not considered a "departure" per Matter of Arrabally). So it usually will not be an issue.

 

Being married or not is not a factor with overstay.

 

Unlawful presence begins accruing on day 1 after the I-94. It is then tolled (paused) while you have a pending AOS case. If denied, it starts accruing again from where it left off.

 

The first bar (3 years) is at 180 days of unlawful presence. The next is a 10 year bar and begins at 1 year of unlawful presence.

Thanks for the detailed reply. I wonder if it would actually be enforced with a former USC spouse who overstayed a K visa. I understand now the overstay was not “forgiven” during the AOS process, but rather “paused”. But I wonder how strict they are about that. Have we heard of anyone who abandoned AOS and was then subject to a bar for overstaying the K1? I guess most people who abandon AOS are probably not in a hurry to return to the states anyway. 

[geowrian 22,337]

33 minutes ago, Cndn said:

Thanks for the detailed reply. I wonder if it would actually be enforced with a former USC spouse who overstayed a K visa. I understand now the overstay was not “forgiven” during the AOS process, but rather “paused”. But I wonder how strict they are about that. Have we heard of anyone who abandoned AOS and was then subject to a bar for overstaying the K1? I guess most people who abandon AOS are probably not in a hurry to return to the states anyway. 

Yes it would be enforced as it it automatic and non-discretionary.

There are cases of people who overstayed a K-1 and then left and received a bar. Sometimes they did so with intent to return (i.e. an emergency back home and no AP).

[Cndn 98]

50 minutes ago, geowrian said:

Yes it would be enforced as it it automatic and non-discretionary.

There are cases of people who overstayed a K-1 and then left and received a bar. Sometimes they did so with intent to return (i.e. an emergency back home and no AP).

Ah I didn’t realize it was automatic. Thanks!

[HRQX 4,145]

4 hours ago, Cndn said:

I understand now the overstay was not “forgiven” during the AOS process, but rather “paused”.

Assuming OP's friend filed the I-485 before the I-94 expired, then there isn't a single day of "unlawful presence"; even if OP's friend decides to abandon the I-485 process (9 FAM 302.11-3(B)(1)).