Irritating

[addy 0]

My family and I were friends with a neighbor and his family for a long time until the neighbor died. My mom sometimes talks to his daughter if they meet at the store or anywhere. I used to be friends with her son who is in his 30's now. She thought it would be cute if we started to date but we never had much in common and I never felt anything for him. We ran into her a while back and she would always tell me what the guy was doing but I told her I have my boyfriend and I've been with him for years and we're going to marry. I thought she accepted that until eventually, around Mother's Day, she wanted to say hi to us and wish a happy mother's day to my mom. She and her son were on the way to the movies and they stopped by to talk to us and both she and her son were eyeing me and she kept telling me what he does now, the truck he bought, he owns this and that and I just nod and wish them to go away. When he had another girlfriend, she would always say how much she didn't like her and showed us a pic of the guy with me at the wedding we stood in and she would gush it was her favorite. When he needed a simple surgery, she would always tell me where he is expecting me to see him. Dan was with me last year when she wanted me to come with my family to a funeral for her ex husband so I could comfort her son. Now with my sister's baby shower in August, we have to invite the lady, since she's always invited us to something, and I'm afraid she'll try and push her son on me again even though I make it clear I'm involved with somebody already.

The other thing that irks me is that other people who know me keep asking me "still with the guy?" My dentist and her nurses are huge gossipers and they know about my love but one of them REALLY irks me and says he's my friend. "Still with him?" "Are you going over there?" "How's your friend?" I hate it when they think of him as my friend. Even a cousin asks if we're still together. It's like these people don't believe I have my boyfriend and it's making me angry. Just because he's in wales and they don't see me with a guy, they think I'm an old spinster. Please tell me if any of you have ever been in this boat?

[JoeMama 0]

As long as you know who you're with and who you love, don't let the other people that are irritating you, bother you. Do people in Wales say, "Piss off!"? Maybe give it a shot here

[Quinn 2]

Ha, omg, I'm sorry for laughing, but I can relate to the second point. In my case it's more of a refusal on my family's behalf to let their little girl grow up. When Ernest gets here, i'll be staying with my grandparents until we can get settled in the city we want to move to. They've already told me they plan to get an air mattress for him to sleep on in the living room. Hello! He's coming here to marry me! You're going to make him sleep in the living room when he's my husband too? Honestly, they're not old fashioned, I think it's more of the fact that just don't want to think about the two of us in the same bed!

Another funny thing: Last summer this guy was hitting on me at a concert. He would not take the hint that i was not interested, even after i told him I had a boyfriend. When he asked where my boyfriend was, I told him the truth...he's in South Africa. He didn't believe me! He thought i was making up this fake South African boyfriend, even alluding to the fact that i was like Anthony Michael Hall, from the Breakfast Club....he had a fake girlfriend in the Niagra Falls area.

In the end...i think these sort of happenings end up becoming great funny stories to tell your friends. i can definitely see being annoyed by that woman, but it is pretty funny, and it has definitely helped me to laugh at these absurd situations.

[Kathryn41 3,205]

My husband had something similar happen to him. He met a woman through a mutual friend who kept trying to matchmake for him with one of her friends. She wouldn't take no for an answer even when he told her about me. He took the first opportunity when I was down for us to drop in and visit with this woman. She was very surprised! She honestly didn't think he was serious about me, even though he had told her so in no uncertain terms. Once she got it through her head that we were a couple and I was moving down she stopped trying to set him up with her friends.

The answer may be, if you can manage it, to have your fiance with you during the event this summer so you can introduce him as your fiance to one and all, and explain you are just waiting for all of the immigration paperwork to be processed.

I think my own friends back in Canada honestly did not believe I would be moving to the US until it actually happened as well, so you are in good company.

Edited June 7, 2007 by Kathryn41

[addy 0]

They won't believe it until we're married and together. I bet they are waiting for the wedding to prove it is evidence I am off the market. I'm letting these stupid people get to me.

When I took my mum to the dentist, the nurse checking her, asks how my friend is. I don't give her much info and don't even mention the trip. When the dentist comes in and sees me wearing a wales shirt she asks about my plans and to her I tell her about my trip. At least she doesn't refer to Dan as my friend. It was a direct hit to the bonehead who was listening and was probably wondering why I didn't mention the trip to her in the first place.

The lady and her son will take convincing. Dan was with me when they called but they had a funeral for a relative and that would have been very inappropriate to show them my fiance. I don't think there is any way to politely tell them to piss off. I'm wondering if this trip will convince them or maybe it will have to be Dan that convinces them to leave us alone.

[Dan J 277]

Been there too. It's way wayyyy annoying. I even had a beyotch told me upfront that my relationship was fake, because I have LDR and she had her fiance in flesh and blood. I love Dan-my fiance very much and to have someone judged me like that, it hurts me so much. I've had way many negative opinions regarding my relationship just because most don't think it's NORMAL. What's normal anyway ?... Just because we're not holding hands, not kissing each other's flesh we just can't love ?. But I never showed them my anger, I mostly just being quiet or giving a bitter smile as a reply whenever they ask. Addy, don't give a ** about those people in your neighborhood, just go with one that makes you happy. Don't let them rent a space in your brain and don't let them drain your emotion. Save those all for your love and your relationship. If you need to vent with a friend, find one that doesn't judge you.

Stay strong, and best wishes for your journey.

-Gemvita