How to Fight Toxic Masculinity

[Randyandyuni 2,682]

5 minutes ago, laylalex said:

I am just asking nicely now to be referred to as a woman. And to comment that other women prefer to be addressed the same way. Do people go around saying, males do this or that frequently? No. They are men or boys.

I have never been anything other than polite to you, as I strive to do in all my interactions with people. I am not sensitive to being addressed collectively as male, man or boy all are correct, none are offensive except in context. 

[Boris Farage 353]

1 minute ago, laylalex said:

I said I don't mind being called a lady. Please don't put words in my mouth. And "fairer sex"? I know you're only around my age. 

 

🙄

 

Can we get back to topic? Maybe Boris can tell us the challenges he has faced with being a man in a society that favors... females. 😎

 

 

How are we off-topic? Randy just now told you of his challenges being a man in a society that favors females.

 

And here I am in a society that favors females ... where I apparently am un-PC for using the terms "female" and "fairer sex." So, still on-topic.

[Randyandyuni 2,682]

3 minutes ago, laylalex said:

I said I don't mind being called a lady. Please don't put words in my mouth. And "fairer sex"? I know you're only around my age. 

 

🙄

 

😎

 

 

So I can say fairer sex because I am old and male? But he cannot?

[laylalex 7,285]

4 minutes ago, Randyandyuni said:

I have never been anything other than polite to you, as I strive to do in all my interactions with people. I am not sensitive to being addressed collectively as male, man or boy all are correct, none are offensive except in context. 

Thank you, Randy. I never said you weren't being polite. And it's good to know how others react to language so that we can address people in ways that aren't offensive. 🙂

 

And as for "fairer sex," all I meant was that it's just weird to hear the phrase out of a fellow millennial's mouth/keyboard! It really isn't anything I've ever heard any of my peers say, with the exception of my ex who is old-fashioned and fussy.

 

No offense intended!!!

 

7 minutes ago, Boris Farage said:

How are we off-topic? Randy just now told you of his challenges being a man in a society that favors females.

 

And here I am in a society that favors females ... where I apparently am un-PC for using the terms "female" and "fairer sex." So, still on-topic.

I am asking you nicely to call me a woman. You can also call me a lady if that is more comfortable for you. 

[Randyandyuni 2,682]

2 minutes ago, laylalex said:

Thank you, Randy. I never said you weren't being polite. And it's good to know how others react to language so that we can address people in ways that aren't offensive. 🙂

 

And as for "fairer sex," all I meant was that it's just weird to hear the phrase out of a fellow millennial's mouth/keyboard! It really isn't anything I've ever heard any of my peers say, with the exception of my ex who is old-fashioned and fussy.

 

No offense intended!!!

 

I am asking you nicely to call me a woman. You can also call me a lady if that is more comfortable for you. 

We are good, I agree a boring world if we all Agree

[laylalex 7,285]

1 minute ago, Randyandyuni said:

We are good, I agree a boring world if we all Agree

I understand that it can all be kind of a bit much, but language changes over time. There are a couple of words (I will not say them here, but one is British slang for a cigarette) that I've been told not to say by others because they are now offensive. I try to remember to be polite but occasionally one slips out. (Whoops.)

[Boris Farage 353]

6 minutes ago, laylalex said:

I am asking you nicely to call me a woman. You can also call me a lady if that is more comfortable for you. 

And I replied that yes, this would be the polite thing to do. If I address you directly, I will assuredly use the term you prefer. In all other conversation, I will use the terms I think appropriate to my response.

 

It's a shame the term "fairer sex" is being mocked. I believe it connotes a degree of respect unequaled by other more mundane terms. If it has fallen from fashion, then we are poorer wordsmiths because of it.

[Boiler 45,525]

Fairer Sex is a term of the Patriarchy.

[laylalex 7,285]

1 minute ago, Boris Farage said:

And I replied that yes, this would be the polite thing to do. If I address you directly, I will assuredly use the term you prefer. In all other conversation, I will use the terms I think appropriate to my response.

 

It's a shame the term "fairer sex" is being mocked. I believe it connotes a degree of respect unequaled by other more mundane terms. If it has fallen from fashion, then we are poorer wordsmiths because of it.

But why are women "fairer"? Is it because of how we look? Or how we speak or walk or exist in the world? It implies that we are somehow better than men, which I do not agree with. It isn't respect, in my opinion, it's fetishization of a particular type of womanhood. And what happens when women don't conform to that type? I am told I'm a pretty traditionally feminine woman. I wear dresses frequently, make an effort to look "nice" (whatever that means) and am told I tend to be a bit submissive to men. I think I might easily fall in your category of the "fairer sex." But is a butch lesbian also a member of the fairer sex as naturally as I am?

[Steeleballz 7,550]

52 minutes ago, Boris Farage said:

Let Boris clear it up for you: that was an opinion piece, not an absolute grammar rule. Between some random internet blog and classic English writers, I'll stick with Ms. Austen and Ms. Brontë.

 

     Your opinion vs grammar girls? Sorry, you can stick your fountain pen back in your codpiece. I'll take grammar girl's word over yours on this one.  

[laylalex 7,285]

1 minute ago, Steeleballz said:

 

     Your opinion vs grammar girls? Sorry, you can stick your fountain pen back in your codpiece. I'll take grammar girl's word over yours on this one.  

To be fair to @Boris Farage, he did use "Ms." instead of "Miss" when referring to Brontë and Austen! Perhaps there is hope for him yet!

[Boris Farage 353]

1 minute ago, Steeleballz said:

 

     Your opinion vs grammar girls? Sorry, you can stick your fountain pen back in your codpiece. I'll take grammar girl's word over yours on this one.  

You don't have to take my word. Take the Oxford English Dictionary's word.

 

And please take note that "Grammar Girl" did not discover the absolute you are implying. She wrote an opinion. If you want to incorporate her opinion into your own usage, well it's a free country. But the English language stands as it was before you and Laylalex weighed in.

4 minutes ago, laylalex said:

To be fair to @Boris Farage, he did use "Ms." instead of "Miss" when referring to Brontë and Austen! Perhaps there is hope for him yet!

Two of my favorite female English writers. 😉

[laylalex 7,285]

1 minute ago, Boris Farage said:

 

Two of my favorite female English writers. 😉

You get a point from me for using female as an adjective. ❤

[Steeleballz 7,550]

Just now, Boris Farage said:

You don't have to take my word. Take the Oxford English Dictionary's word.

 

And please take note that "Grammar Girl" did not discover the absolute you are implying. She wrote an opinion. If you want to incorporate her opinion into your own usage, well it's a free country. But the English language stands as it was before you and Laylalex weighed in.

 

   You can leave the goalposts where they are. No one said it's an absolute. In fact I said grammar girl can clear it up for you.  

 

   I acknowledged it was an opinion. There's no need for you to get hung up on it just because it's a better opinion than your own. 

[Boris Farage 353]

1 minute ago, Steeleballz said:

 

   You can leave the goalposts where they are. No one said it's an absolute. In fact I said grammar girl can clear it up for you.  

 

   I acknowledged it was an opinion. There's no need for you to get hung up on it just because it's a better opinion than your own. 

Have some more coffee. You picked a fight with me, you insulted me. I politely clarified, and added to the on-topic discussion.

 

I apologise if my choice of writing instrument is a trigger for you, I only mentioned my preference because somebody else brought it up.

 

I've been warned by moderators not to insult other posters, but it seems there's an old boys club around here that allows select members to get away with it. Typical, but I will continue to take the high road. I hope your day gets better, Steele.