Step child parent not wanting child to go to US

[Shanshanjamrock 44]

8 minutes ago, jeanita68 said:

Yea..we definitely wont kidnap or smuggle her. And she doesnt live with dad because they make him believe he has no rights to the child. Yes my husband works and he pays for everything. Thats all they want from him bur no let her live with him not even in DR. He jus thinks because her mom says no he cant. He has rights he is her father. She is not evening working and has never worked so she claims. My husband gives grandma everything for the child. 

It sound to me like the mom is jealous, spiteful are just have badman toward the dad, but on the other end it get confusing because she is not living in the country she doesn't visit the child on a regular basis but she doesn't want the child to have a better life, it's not like she's benefiting from what the child is getting because she is not the one who have the child. when I came to the United States I left my three year old living with my parents his dad only take care of him financially he doesn't visit him he doesn't call him he doesn't check up on him he will just either send the money with someone or have brother to meet him somewhere and I filed for my son and he didn't even know and the day before my son was leaving my dad call him and let him know that my son was leaving which I told him not to but he thought he was the father and he should know and that was it I wasn't having any problem with immigration he didn't need to sign anyting but I guess every Caribbean  country is different and mine is Jamaica. A couple people have said it on here that you should go to the court and try and see if you have a better chance of getting her continue to love and care for her and I see you do very much best of luck

[jeanita68 231]

3 hours ago, Shanshanjamrock said:

It sound to me like the mom is jealous, spiteful are just have badman toward the dad, but on the other end it get confusing because she is not living in the country she doesn't visit the child on a regular basis but she doesn't want the child to have a better life, it's not like she's benefiting from what the child is getting because she is not the one who have the child. when I came to the United States I left my three year old living with my parents his dad only take care of him financially he doesn't visit him he doesn't call him he doesn't check up on him he will just either send the money with someone or have brother to meet him somewhere and I filed for my son and he didn't even know and the day before my son was leaving my dad call him and let him know that my son was leaving which I told him not to but he thought he was the father and he should know and that was it I wasn't having any problem with immigration he didn't need to sign anyting but I guess every Caribbean  country is different and mine is Jamaica. A couple people have said it on here that you should go to the court and try and see if you have a better chance of getting her continue to love and care for her and I see you do very much best of luck

Thank you. I think we have a strong case. We are going to court. My husband is gathering everything all the pictures, pics of all the school fuctions he attends, receipts of things he pays, the school bill he pays also. To show how much he is active in her life and that the mother does nothing n only been to visit 3x for 2-3weeks in the past 7yrs. 

[SusieQQQ 11,586]

18 minutes ago, jeanita68 said:

Thank you. I think we have a strong case. We are going to court. My husband is gathering everything all the pictures, pics of all the school functions he attends, receipts of things he pays, the school bill he pays also. To show how much he is active in her life and that the mother does nothing n only been to visit 3x for 2-3weeks in the past 7yrs. 

Good luck with your endeavors. If what you are doing is truly in the child's best interests then I wish you guys the best of luck (said as someone who had a parent who used her kids for spite against her ex-spouse without caring what was best for the kids).  Please keep the thread updated - it is surely neither the first nor will be the last similar situation faced by people, and apart from those of us who I guess are just genuinely curious as to the outcome it could be useful for someone else further down the line.

[jeanita68 231]

2 hours ago, SusieQQQ said:

Good luck with your endeavors. If what you are doing is truly in the child's best interests then I wish you guys the best of luck (said as someone who had a parent who used her kids for spite against her ex-spouse without caring what was best for the kids).  Please keep the thread updated - it is surely neither the first nor will be the last similar situation faced by people, and apart from those of us who I guess are just genuinely curious as to the outcome it could be useful for someone else further down the line.

Trust me its definitely in the best interest of my stepdaughter. If her mother was in her life, i would most definitely not want to take her from her mom. But only parent she knows her father. I will update this case and let everyone know what happens, thanks again for all your help and advice! 

[QueenComley 295]

On 8/24/2019 at 9:26 PM, SusieQQQ said:

That's easy to say when you live in a first world country. Very different when you don't.

Not easy at all. I still had to leave my loved ones and life behind just like many others. The fact remains there is a child involved where bio mom will not give consent to let said child move  to America. If OP wants to be with her fiancé I stand by what I say. Kids come first. OP already owns a property in DR with her spouse. If she wants to have her step-daughter with her permanently, then right now a move to the DR seems the only option available.

Edited August 27, 2019 by QueenComley

[SusieQQQ 11,586]

2 hours ago, QueenComley said:

Not easy at all. I still had to leave my loved ones and life behind just like many others. The fact remains there is a child involved where bio mom will not give consent to let said child move  to America. If OP wants to be with her fiancé I stand by what I say. Kids come first. OP already owns a property in DR with her spouse. If she wants to have her step-daughter with her permanently, then right now a move to the DR seems the only option available.

You missed my point, but I get that it’s often hard for people from places like the U.K. to comprehend that there are countries that make the US look like a far safer option, never mind the better education opportunities etc. There are reasons many people actually send their children to the US while they stay behind and it’s not because they don’t care about the children. Anyway OP has already said that they’ll move there if necessary. 

[Ontarkie 14,218]

21 hours ago, MJMH said:

Full custody does give the parent the right to relocate to another country with the child. The mother can visit her in the US as much as she can visit her anywhere else. She is not living with her anyways. The grandmother is elderly and sick. I would take this matter in front of a judge, and let the court grant you full permission to take the child to the US.

Be careful with that. Full custody in some countries give the custodian parent the rights to move the child to another country. 

I had to have a court order to move my kids to the US and I had sole custody. So please do not post blanket statements out there,  someone may think it is that way for all countries. 

[geowrian 22,337]

Agreed - requirements to emigrate vary heavily from country to country. In some, just the mother's permission may be needed in some circumstances. In others, written permission and/or a court order may be required, regardless of custody.

[Ontarkie 14,218]

The mother is not allowing her to leave because your husband pays for everything. You said it yourself. He pays her schooling and everything else. He is the grandmothers cash cow and if the grand daughter leaves she gets no more money. 

[jeanita68 231]

10 hours ago, Ontarkie said:

The mother is not allowing her to leave because your husband pays for everything. You said it yourself. He pays her schooling and everything else. He is the grandmothers cash cow and if the grand daughter leaves she gets no more money. 

You absolutely right. And i didnt even think of that. Because why wouldnt they want the child to hve a better life and opportunties, especially when the mom is no where around and cant provide or give the child nothing, even for christmas she didnt send her anything..the past 4 christmas she sends nothing. We gave grandma money to make christmas dinner for the grandkids. 

[QueenComley 295]

20 hours ago, SusieQQQ said:

You missed my point, but I get that it’s often hard for people from places like the U.K. to comprehend that there are countries that make the US look like a far safer option, never mind the better education opportunities etc. There are reasons many people actually send their children to the US while they stay behind and it’s not because they don’t care about the children. Anyway OP has already said that they’ll move there if necessary. 

 20 years ago I was married to an Albanian, and moved there. The toilet was a hole in the floor, cold water to bathe - if there was any water, and barley no electric, not to mention women were treated appallingly. I understand the huge struggle to give up things we take for granted every day and chose, out of love, to move and to live surrounded by terrible poverty. It was many moons ago, and despite the terrible living conditions Albania itself is a beautiful county. And it certainly was an experience.

Edited August 27, 2019 by QueenComley

[jeanita68 231]

9 hours ago, QueenComley said:

 20 years ago I was married to an Albanian, and moved there. The toilet was a hole in the floor, cold water to bathe - if there was any water, and barley no electric, not to mention women were treated appallingly. I understand the huge struggle to give up things we take for granted every day and chose, out of love, to move and to live surrounded by terrible poverty. It was many moons ago, and despite the terrible living conditions Albania itself is a beautiful county. And it certainly was an experience.

Yea.. DR also as its issues, but a beautiful country. And i will retire there. We working on getting custody of my step daughter. The lawyer said we have a very good chance, and in this case he never saw a judge turn down the parent thats in the child life. We presented everything we had. My husband will continue with the plan to arrive here. And the lawyer advised us to continue with the immigration process. He said it will help to show the judge we in the process of getting her to live with us

[Shanshanjamrock 44]

3 hours ago, jeanita68 said:

Yea.. DR also as its issues, but a beautiful country. And i will retire there. We working on getting custody of my step daughter. The lawyer said we have a very good chance, and in this case he never saw a judge turn down the parent thats in the child life. We presented everything we had. My husband will continue with the plan to arrive here. And the lawyer advised us to continue with the immigration process. He said it will help to show the judge we in the process of getting her to live with us

I'm really happy to hear that things are progressing I have no doubt that things will work out in both you and your husband  favor stay bless.