Step child parent not wanting child to go to US

[jeanita68 231]

12 minutes ago, Daphne K said:

I don't think a verbal consent would have been enough anyway, at some point a written consent would have been necessary I think.

 

But trying to get sole custody would be a route to go, not sure how the law works in the DR. Here in The Netherlands it would be very hard to take away parental rights only based upon the fact that the child does not live with the parent or the parent lives in a different country. Unless the parent has drug/mental illness issues, is abusive in any proven way, or in case of serious neglect, will the judge consider taking away parental rights. 

I will keep my fingers crossed for you that you will not have to take it that far and that all will work out well...Maybe it will only take a little more time for mom to come to terms with it, who knows.. 🤞🏻

 

Thank you! We would even bring her every summer to the grandmother in DR. 

[Andy & Val 494]

4 minutes ago, jeanita68 said:

Maybe. But I wish she wouldn’t leave the child for so many years at a time. Since the child was 2 she seen her only 3 times for 2-3 week visit 

It might take a while (or not), but I see you all finding a common ground soon.

You all have to talk things out for the common good of that innocent girl.

Best of luck!

[Daphne . 1,863]

5 minutes ago, jeanita68 said:

Maybe. But I wish she wouldn’t leave the child for so many years at a time. Since the child was 2 she seen her only 3 times for 2-3 week visit 

Well, I think it also depends on the reason. As stated earlier in this thread, sometimes parents move to a different country and leave their child/children with relatives to get a better paying job for a 'better' life for them. Whether this actually is the best solution, might be different for different people. If she would not care, she would also not care about the child moving to the US maybe. Sometimes people have to make very difficult decisions..

[jeanita68 231]

7 minutes ago, Andy & Val said:

It might take a while (or not), but I see you all finding a common ground soon.

You all have to talk things out for the common good of that innocent girl.

Best of luck!

Thank you!🙏🏾

[jeanita68 231]

4 minutes ago, Daphne K said:

Well, I think it also depends on the reason. As stated earlier in this thread, sometimes parents move to a different country and leave their child/children with relatives to get a better paying job for a 'better' life for them. Whether this actually is the best solution, might be different for different people. If she would not care, she would also not care about the child moving to the US maybe. Sometimes people have to make very difficult decisions..

Maybe but she is not working. That’s why she says she can’t come to visit. She’s there living with a boyfriend. 

[SusieQQQ 11,586]

9 minutes ago, Daphne K said:

Well, I think it also depends on the reason. As stated earlier in this thread, sometimes parents move to a different country and leave their child/children with relatives to get a better paying job for a 'better' life for them. Whether this actually is the best solution, might be different for different people. If she would not care, she would also not care about the child moving to the US maybe. Sometimes people have to make very difficult decisions..

If she wants a better life for the child, usually that means agreeing to move from a developing country to a developed one when that option arises.  History and current times are both full of parents sending their children elsewhere for a better life.

[jeanita68 231]

5 minutes ago, SusieQQQ said:

If she wants a better life for the child, usually that means agreeing to move from a developing country to a developed one when that option arises.  History and current times are both full of parents sending their children elsewhere for a better life.

Exactly my point..why doesn’t she want her to come to the US besides being spiteful to my husband. Herself she left DR to live somewhere else she claims for a better life, but she is not working, Hans seen the child in 2 yrs, doesn’t provide nothing, my husband does every thing, he pays for her school, buys her clothes, bring food for the grandmother to come, take the child every where to the movies, the park, event, the carnival. While her mother is living her life somewhere else. Why didn’t she take her child with her. Why don’t she bring her child there for vacation. She’s in a country where DR residents don’t need a visa

Edited August 24, 2019 by jeanita68

[geowrian 22,337]

3 minutes ago, jeanita68 said:

Exactly my point..why doesn’t she want her to come to the US besides being spiteful to my husband.

It's impossible for anybody here to get in her head as to the underlying reason why. But it sounds like she isn't ready to potentially never see the child again. There's a difference between being absentee parent and no longer having the option.

Just my $0.02...

[jeanita68 231]

9 minutes ago, geowrian said:

It's impossible for anybody here to get in her head as to the underlying reason why. But it sounds like she isn't ready to potentially never see the child again. There's a difference between being absentee parent and no longer having the option.

Just my $0.02...

Yes.. but why not at least give her a chance at a better future, it’s not like she sees her anyway. This is only hurting the child. 

[Georgia16 2,858]

29 minutes ago, jeanita68 said:

Yes.. but why not at least give her a chance at a better future, it’s not like she sees her anyway. This is only hurting the child. 

Have you tried to ask her if she will agree to the child immigrating to us if you guys get a written note with a lawyer notarized and everything stating that you will bring the child to the DR (saw you said every summer) and you pay for it. 

 

What does the grandmother where where the child lives say? Could she be the one telling her daughter to say no if she is attached to the child after having her all these years?

[jeanita68 231]

23 minutes ago, Georgia16 said:

Have you tried to ask her if she will agree to the child immigrating to us if you guys get a written note with a lawyer notarized and everything stating that you will bring the child to the DR (saw you said every summer) and you pay for it. 

 

What does the grandmother where where the child lives say? Could she be the one telling her daughter to say no if she is attached to the child after having her all these years?

The grandmother agrees we should take her to live with us. Because sometimes she gets sick and doesn’t feel so good. She’s a diabetic. I told my husband to try talking to her again, and tell her we will bring her to DR every summer. Hopefully she agrees and we don’t have to go through all this

 

[Georgia16 2,858]

23 minutes ago, jeanita68 said:

The grandmother agrees we should take her to live with us. Because sometimes she gets sick and doesn’t feel so good. She’s a diabetic. I told my husband to try talking to her again, and tell her we will bring her to DR every summer. Hopefully she agrees and we don’t have to go through all this

 

If you go to court then get a statement from the grandmother saying exactly that. 

[payxibka 10,045]

Why does the child live with grandma and not the father?

[jeanita68 231]

10 minutes ago, payxibka said:

Why does the child live with grandma and not the father?

She left the child with her grandmother, when I met my husband I told him take her to live with him and he said he has no rights. The mother didn’t want her living with him. But he picks her up from school every day, he pays for the school he provides food and every thing so i never understood why he didn’t just take her. He was always afraid the child mother would make trouble for him. She tried to control him even when we brought a house in DR she was mad because he sold his apartment for us to invest in a bigger house. 

[payxibka 10,045]

1 minute ago, jeanita68 said:

She left the child with her grandmother, when I met my husband I told him take her to live with him and he said he has no rights. The mother didn’t want her living with him. But he picks her up from school every day, he pays for the school he provides food and every thing so i never understood why he didn’t just take her. He was always afraid the child mother would make trouble for him. She tried to control him even when we brought a house in DR she was mad because he sold his apartment for us to invest in a bigger house. 

Personally I think that's pretty damning negative evidence in him trying to get sole custody.   On could argue that the only parent she has had is grandma.   If he is going to be successful,  it will come with grandma's help