FIANCEE ACTING-UP AFTER K1 VISA WAS GRANTED

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

7 hours ago, Favour08 said:

 

My Fiancee started acting up

 

Children act up, not grown women. I don't know if this is a language barrier issue or not, but if my husband ever said I was "acting up", he'd be in hot water for infantilizing me.

 

Your former fiancee has made her choice and it is time for you to graciously accept that choice, stay in Nigeria, and move on with your life.

[Elif_and_Greg 164]

9 minutes ago, N-o-l-a said:

Children act up, not grown women. I don't know if this is a language barrier issue or not, but if my husband ever said I was "acting up", he'd be in hot water for infantilizing me.

 

Your former fiancee has made her choice and it is time for you to graciously accept that choice, stay in Nigeria, and move on with your life.

Grown men and women can act up. Sorry. 

[aaron2020 11,651]

12 minutes ago, N-o-l-a said:

Children act up, not grown women. I don't know if this is a language barrier issue or not, but if my husband ever said I was "acting up", he'd be in hot water for infantilizing me.

 

Your former fiancee has made her choice and it is time for you to graciously accept that choice, stay in Nigeria, and move on with your life.

As a man, I hear you.

Prepare for the fallout of "well, both men and women can act up."

[SunflowerSweet 1,321]

18 minutes ago, Elif_and_Greg said:

Grown men and women can act up. Sorry. 

An adult woman wanting to exit a relationship is not "acting up". That sort of language, especially in the situation presented, is patronizing at best and controlling and gaslighting at worst. 

 

You also implied that in another post that if a woman were to want to leave you that infidelity is the logical conclusion to jump to, not possibly something you did wrong. Whole lot of bad coming off of all that. 

[Elif_and_Greg 164]

3 minutes ago, MorganandMichael said:

An adult woman wanting to exit a relationship is not "acting up". That sort of language, especially in the situation presented, is patronizing at best and controlling and gaslighting at worst. 

 

You also implied that in another post that if a woman were to want to leave you that infidelity is the logical conclusion to jump to, not possibly something you did wrong. Whole lot of bad coming off of all that. 

While it's fun to police language, the guy IS from Nigeria so we can just as easily assume that's the best way he knows how to describe what his fiance is doing. 

 

I also didn't imply that infidelity was a logical conclusion to jump to. I merely said it's a valid question. This would be true in any relationship, whereas if someone suddenly decided to leave you, you'd wonder if they were seeing someone else. 

 

Either way we don't know the details, so we're left to make assumptions. Which I did. And I had a good time doing it. Thanks. 

[Michael Tetteh 7]

8 hours ago, Favour08 said:

Hi Everyone,

 

My Fiancee started acting up and bring up issues after my interview at the US Embassy was successful and they granted us K1 Fiance Visa. She insisted I should not come. I love her so much and I never cheated on her neither did I disrespected her in any way. All efforts to makeup and settle issues with her has not been positive. A lot of financial and physical efforts have been committed on this immigration project to a great extent. However, I am currently in my home still waiting for her instruction despite the fact that my expiry date is fast approaching.

  

Please advice:

1) Should I travel to USA and see if she will resolve matter with me by the time she see my physical presence?

2) Should I travel to USA and hire an immigrant lawyer to advise on other options

3) Please what exactly should I do???

Please your advice will be well appreciated.

 

Thank you

 

Listen just come over to her if you know her address or whatever and she is still acting up, hire a lawyer and you will be fine with adjusting your status. Don’t waste time over there

[Going through 5,671]

4 minutes ago, Michael Tetteh said:

Listen just come over to her if you know her address or whatever and she is still acting up, hire a lawyer and you will be fine with adjusting your status. Don’t waste time over there

Hire a lawyer for what, exactly?  What can a lawyer do in a situation where she doesn't wish to marry him?

[Elif_and_Greg 164]

Just now, Going through said:

Hire a lawyer for what, exactly?  What can a lawyer do in a situation where she doesn't wish to marry him?

I think that guy was just trolling the OP. 

[Timona 4,207]

1 minute ago, Going through said:

Hire a lawyer for what, exactly?  What can a lawyer do in a situation where she doesn't wish to marry him?

I think he was being sarcastic. 

[laylalex 7,284]

Before my ex and I (notice the ex!) filed for the K1, we had an earlier engagement that I broke off due to what I thought was inappropriate behavior on his behalf. We were *this* close to filing for the K1, papers ready to go out. My fiance had been goaded by a friend into making some nasty comments about me on a public internet forum, which the friend then forwarded to me as proof that my then-fiance was not a good choice as a husband. He (my fiance) begged and pleaded with me to forgive him and file for the K1. When I told him no, we needed to split up, guess what he called what I was doing? "Acting up"!!! I cannot make this up. Luckily for him, the K1 papers were not filed yet, so he spent the next six months sweet talking me back into our engagement as it all had been a terrible mistake, and I was completely misinterpreting what he said. We filed for the K1 finally and here I am, divorced from the jerk nine years after he wore me down. I wish he had respected my choice and left me alone.

 

OP, if your fiancee is telling you no, RESPECT HER CHOICE. Move on with your life. 

[Elif_and_Greg 164]

4 minutes ago, laylalex said:

Before my ex and I (notice the ex!) filed for the K1, we had an earlier engagement that I broke off due to what I thought was inappropriate behavior on his behalf. We were *this* close to filing for the K1, papers ready to go out. My fiance had been goaded by a friend into making some nasty comments about me on a public internet forum, which the friend then forwarded to me as proof that my then-fiance was not a good choice as a husband. He (my fiance) begged and pleaded with me to forgive him and file for the K1. When I told him no, we needed to split up, guess what he called what I was doing? "Acting up"!!! I cannot make this up. Luckily for him, the K1 papers were not filed yet, so he spent the next six months sweet talking me back into our engagement as it all had been a terrible mistake, and I was completely misinterpreting what he said. We filed for the K1 finally and here I am, divorced from the jerk nine years after he wore me down. I wish he had respected my choice and left me alone.

 

OP, if your fiancee is telling you no, RESPECT HER CHOICE. Move on with your life. 

So you took the guy back? And it's his fault you took him back because he was just so convincing? 

[Becci391 339]

8 hours ago, Favour08 said:

Hi Everyone,

 

My Fiancee started acting up and bring up issues after my interview at the US Embassy was successful and they granted us K1 Fiance Visa. She insisted I should not come. I love her so much and I never cheated on her neither did I disrespected her in any way. All efforts to makeup and settle issues with her has not been positive. A lot of financial and physical efforts have been committed on this immigration project to a great extent. However, I am currently in my home still waiting for her instruction despite the fact that my expiry date is fast approaching.

  

Please advice:

1) Should I travel to USA and see if she will resolve matter with me by the time she see my physical presence?

2) Should I travel to USA and hire an immigrant lawyer to advise on other options

3) Please what exactly should I do???

Please your advice will be well appreciated.

 

Thank you

 

Stay where you are.

She doesn't want to continue the relationship. Whatever reason she has. Respect it and move on.

 

If you show up at her door she can turn your life into a living hell.

[jeanieCZ 228]

8 minutes ago, laylalex said:

Before my ex and I (notice the ex!) filed for the K1, we had an earlier engagement that I broke off due to what I thought was inappropriate behavior on his behalf. We were *this* close to filing for the K1, papers ready to go out. My fiance had been goaded by a friend into making some nasty comments about me on a public internet forum, which the friend then forwarded to me as proof that my then-fiance was not a good choice as a husband. He (my fiance) begged and pleaded with me to forgive him and file for the K1. When I told him no, we needed to split up, guess what he called what I was doing? "Acting up"!!! I cannot make this up. Luckily for him, the K1 papers were not filed yet, so he spent the next six months sweet talking me back into our engagement as it all had been a terrible mistake, and I was completely misinterpreting what he said. We filed for the K1 finally and here I am, divorced from the jerk nine years after he wore me down. I wish he had respected my choice and left me alone.

 

OP, if your fiancee is telling you no, RESPECT HER CHOICE. Move on with your life. 

Whoa. Respecting one's choices is one thing. But dragging your ex through internet fora is another. Come on. The only people who know what's between them are thw two having a relationship. I don't know why would you use your ex as an illustration here... 

[SunflowerSweet 1,321]

3 minutes ago, jeaniecz said:

Whoa. Respecting one's choices is one thing. But dragging your ex through internet fora is another. Come on. The only people who know what's between them are thw two having a relationship. I don't know why would you use your ex as an illustration here... 

The literal creation of this thread is  the OP questioning his own ex and looking for a way to circumvent her wishes in order to still move to the US.

 

Not really sure how you missed that correlation.

[Shawn and sha 9]

Wow so sorry to hear that there's  a lot of time from beginning to end I agree with afrocraft come on over especially  of you already get ticket  I heard of this alot,  signs were there you were just love blind maybe it happened for a reason when one door closes another will open