age difference of couple

[pokernut 0]

I didnt plan it this way, but my fiance is 25 years younger than me. We have had a few talks about our age, and it doesnt matter to us.

anyone know where this puts us with the embassy interview?

thanks

[DakotaK1 1]

@Pokernut this question has been asked in the past.I hope this can help you:

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...=age+differance

[pnd629 0]

I didnt plan it this way, but my fiance is 25 years younger than me. We have had a few talks about our age, and it doesnt matter to us.

anyone know where this puts us with the embassy interview?

thanks

There doesn't seem to be any rule about age differences--but 25 years is quite a difference.

Others might be able to offer you more specific advice if you give more details--especially which country/embassy you will be dealing with and who is older, the man or the woman. It seems that some countries accept large age differences more readily if the man is older.

[Yodrak 7]

pokernut,

Possible problem - a fiance is a guy.

Getting back to your main question, what are your ages? What country?

Yodrak

I didnt plan it this way, but my fiance is 25 years younger than me. We have had a few talks about our age, and it doesnt matter to us.

anyone know where this puts us with the embassy interview?

thanks

[DavidEvgeniya 0]

Hi there,

I am somewhat in the same boat. My Fiancee is 20 years younger than I. She will be having her interview in Moscow in 12 days. I will certainly let you know how it goes and if the topic is brought up.

David

[Twomoles 8]

Our difference is 19. He is older. It just happens. Not a big deal. He is very smart, matured, good hearted man, and best hubby on this planet, and my love probably is very obvious. But all I can say, in none place or stage of process, there wasn't any question, any mention, any look about age difference from any official buddy. They are suppose to be professionals, and they ask what they have to ask, or what they will find questionable. (My good friend, she is 44, and his husband is 25, and they just had baby) Its really not big deal in modern world in 21 century, as long as your relationship looks real and long lasting, they don't care.

[TomTom 0]

I'm only 3 1/2 months older than my fiancee, and I'm happy about that She's going to be 23 in almost two weeks

Edited June 2, 2007 by TomTom

[Dan J 277]

Significant age diffrences are more acceptible in some cultures outside of the US. Although an age diffrence is not a reason to deny a visa, they will probably be looking closer at your relationship. Large age gaps, are a possible sign of fraud.

[Ngoc-Anh 1]

big age difference does not necessarily means denial.

You just have to be aware of that there might be more questions than in other cases.

good luck!!!

[Danno 1,228]

The biggest risk I think is when two people marry and the are in different "phases of life".

Example; He has nearly grown kids and she has never had any kids.

He has a retirement plan and she is young enough to be on a disco floor every weekend (and maybe is).

He has the benefit of life experience, and she has had very little.

Success is "possible" but the risk factor is much higher, anyone who can not face this reality might be blind to much more.

Usually I hear people comment that "they look much younger" than their actual age ... as if that has something to do with keeping a marriage together.

I certainly don't exempt myself because in my case there is a little higher than average age-gap. Even though it seems to pose not issues now, I have given it very much consideration.

And I am not so foolish to think "love conquers all" (It does as long as there is love).

It's a shame that most of the people who have posted here in the past with large age gaps rarely come back (after marriage) to share as much about what caused the break up or the struggles they have worked through, I think many of us could benefit from that.

* to the author of this thread; how did you "not plan" to be in a relationship with a large age spread ..... did it kinda sneak up on you?

IN my case my lady wrote me a letter and I decided to accept her offer to get to know each other better. It has worked out very well, but I would not claim it was not by design, as we both knew our demographics from the outset.

[KarenCee 3]

Not sure if you would consider ours a huge age gap but I am 14 years older than my husband. He knew this up front as I am most honest about things of this nature. We talked about it, about where each of us would be in different phases of life. We are quite prepared...as prepared as one can be without knowing the actual future.

I have a child already. He had none. We've discussed this as well since I am still of childbearing age albeit late in life if a child were to be born to us. He's told me many times that he feels that my daughter is his own, after all it takes more than genetics to be a father. Yes, I have lived a bit longer than he has, but we have more in common than most would imagine. It's truly as if we are closer in age. Neither of us thinks we look "younger" than the other and no one has made that comment about us. We are merely two pieces of a puzzle. We fit together perfectly.

Our marriage is almost a year old. This July 7 we celebrate our first anniversary. Our relationship is three years old. I think what has made our relationship what it is today...a success...is our constant line of communication. We talk everything out. We have had our down times...but the difference in our situation than what I see a lot on here is we talked it out...we are very honest about how we feel and what each one was feeling in that particular situation. Instead of using the "things are different here" or the "we're just not right for each other" excuse we love each other enough to work out our issue.

In our case "Amor Vincit Omnia" fits...love conquers all because we have love. Not infatuation. Love.

The above is merely my opinioin and my observations, nothing more.

[caybee 21]

I didnt plan it this way, but my fiance is 25 years younger than me. We have had a few talks about our age, and it doesnt matter to us.

anyone know where this puts us with the embassy interview?

thanks

We have a larger-than-average age difference which we addressed with USCIS from the beginning on the I-129F by acknowledging the difference and then discussing our common interests and values. The subject didn't come up at my fiance's interview, although it could have. It is part of the big picture the interviewer will look at, so address it and any other red flags you may have, but it needn't be a huge issue, depending on the country. Imagine yourself as the "objective" interviewer looking at a snapshot of your relationship. Does anything jump out at you? Do you need to move the lighting around a bit, change the focus? Play up your strengths as a couple in your paperwork and at the interview -- and that is not to say that the age difference is a weakness.

While you are playing the waiting game, this is a nice time to learn about the things that help these relationships work (not just age-difference, but cross-cultural, if that is the case for you). That will benefit you both during the interview and afterward. It is true that the age difference doesn't matter as far as love is concerned. On the other hand, there are some practical issues that are bound to crop up. For example, I need to take extra care to stay healthy and active for both our sakes, and I'll have to work harder at that than he will, at least for now. Saving for retirement is a higher priority for me than it is for him. That sort of thing. It's just a slightly different set of preparations than a couple fresh out of college together would make, but it's doable if your eyes are open.

That's more than you asked. Best wishes on your journey.

[Turboguy 6]

In theory they are not supposed to judge the suitabilty of a couple. In this world anyone can fall in love with anyone. Age difference itself is no big deal but couples with a larger age difference to get a closer look for possible visa fraud.

Actually 25 years is not that far above the norm for relationships with women from Russia. One site I go to did a poll and the average was 18 years. Just for the record the age differnce with me and my fiancee is about as big as you get, 38 years.

[pushbrk 13,087]

In theory they are not supposed to judge the suitabilty of a couple. In this world anyone can fall in love with anyone. Age difference itself is no big deal but couples with a larger age difference to get a closer look for possible visa fraud.

Actually 25 years is not that far above the norm for relationships with women from Russia. One site I go to did a poll and the average was 18 years. Just for the record the age differnce with me and my fiancee is about as big as you get, 38 years.

Right, suitability of the couple is not an evaluation criteria for granting a visa but it is a criteria that may be looked at along with numerous other factors in order to spot a fraud profile. For instance, if the male USC is recently divorced, (even more so if the foreigner also has recent divorce) has a low income and the short relationship includes the one required visit, then depending the couple may have to jump through some extra hoops before a visa is granted. A good presentation of relationship bona fides both with the petition and at interview can go a long way towards overcoming this but it is wise to be prepared with all possible information requested in such cases.

"What profile does this fit?" you ask. A very common one indeed. The profile is that the young bride and her family or recent former husband have schemed (for a substancial sum of money) to have the USC divorce his wife and file for a fiance visa. The divorces are on paper only. Relationships continue as before. Both foreigners end up in the USA together and the divorced USC's do too. I don't pretend to know all the profiling criteria but the above is some of it. When this profile is present, it is common to have an initial denial. The couple is then required to prove the residence of both former spouse's as well as to provide SSN' of X and show evidence of funding for any travel to meet the fiance.

If the relationship is bonafide, then the extra steps are a pain in the butt. If it is not, it's an effective crime fighting method.

[pokernut 0]

Im too lazy to go to all the trouble to fraudulently bring someone to he usa..

In theory they are not supposed to judge the suitabilty of a couple. In this world anyone can fall in love with anyone. Age difference itself is no big deal but couples with a larger age difference to get a closer look for possible visa fraud.

Actually 25 years is not that far above the norm for relationships with women from Russia. One site I go to did a poll and the average was 18 years. Just for the record the age differnce with me and my fiancee is about as big as you get, 38 years.

Right, suitability of the couple is not an evaluation criteria for granting a visa but it is a criteria that may be looked at along with numerous other factors in order to spot a fraud profile. For instance, if the male USC is recently divorced, (even more so if the foreigner also has recent divorce) has a low income and the short relationship includes the one required visit, then depending the couple may have to jump through some extra hoops before a visa is granted. A good presentation of relationship bona fides both with the petition and at interview can go a long way towards overcoming this but it is wise to be prepared with all possible information requested in such cases.

"What profile does this fit?" you ask. A very common one indeed. The profile is that the young bride and her family or recent former husband have schemed (for a substancial sum of money) to have the USC divorce his wife and file for a fiance visa. The divorces are on paper only. Relationships continue as before. Both foreigners end up in the USA together and the divorced USC's do too. I don't pretend to know all the profiling criteria but the above is some of it. When this profile is present, it is common to have an initial denial. The couple is then required to prove the residence of both former spouse's as well as to provide SSN' of X and show evidence of funding for any travel to meet the fiance.

If the relationship is bonafide, then the extra steps are a pain in the butt. If it is not, it's an effective crime fighting method.