Vietnamese: Engagement party

[Tom99 0]

Where should the engagement party be, if the guy is from Saigon and the girl is from Can Tho? Some say it depends on the guy, some say the otherway

TIA

[William33 110]

Where should the engagement party be, if the guy is from Saigon and the girl is from Can Tho? Some say it depends on the guy, some say the otherway

TIA

Women rule. Do it there...

[sealedkiss 1]

Thanh,

A proper Vietnamese "dam hoi" ceremony would be held at the girl's place.

1. You, your close relatives and friends meet at your house.

2. You and the people carrying the trays get into a car and the driver will drive you to your fiancee's house. The rest of your party could ride with you or ride separately on the motor scooters.

3. When you arrive at your fiancee's house, somebody from her family will come out, greet and invite your group in. You will hand over the trays now, which will be carried to a table in front of her family's altar.

4. Both sides (one designated speaker per side) will take turns introducing their family and friends attending the ceremony.

5. Both sides (usually a parent of each side, maybe the father if available) will take turns making speeches.

6. Both sides will light up large candle sticks that YOU brought on the altar.

7. You and you fiancee will light incenses and bow to the family's ancestors and God/Buddha.

8. Your side will show the goodies and the jewelry being offered.

9. You, your mom, her mom, etc. will help her put on the jewelry.

10. You and your fiancee will pour wine that YOU brought and offer to the elderly relatives of both sides.

11. Your fiancee's family will invite everyone to eat. They either cooked or had a restaurant cater food to their house.

12. The guests will leave, and your fiancee's family will return to you the trays with portions of the goodies in them.

13. Your family will return home.

Steps may be out of order due to my disappointing memory. Of course there are countless variants. It depends on her family's religion too. For example, her family may not have an altar - there's no need to light incense or bow. And other things.

It's a long answer to your short question. But as far as I know the ceremony always takes place at her house. Now SG-Can Tho is about half a day on the road (right?), so in your case you and your party could arrive in Can Tho first, maybe 1-2 days earlier, find a place to stay, start your final preparation there (wrapping the trays, buying fresh fruits, etc.), and start marching to her place early the next morning or something like that.

But your folks and her folks would know a whole lot more and give their inputs how they want to organize it.

[Ngoc-Anh 1]

Thanh,

A proper Vietnamese "dam hoi" ceremony would be held at the girl's place.

1. You, your close relatives and friends meet at your house.

2. You and the people carrying the trays get into a car and the driver will drive you to your fiancee's house. The rest of your party could ride with you or ride separately on the motor scooters.

3. When you arrive at your fiancee's house, somebody from her family will come out, greet and invite your group in. You will hand over the trays now, which will be carried to a table in front of her family's altar.

4. Both sides (one designated speaker per side) will take turns introducing their family and friends attending the ceremony.

5. Both sides (usually a parent of each side, maybe the father if available) will take turns making speeches.

6. Both sides will light up large candle sticks that YOU brought on the altar.

7. You and you fiancee will light incenses and bow to the family's ancestors and God/Buddha.

8. Your side will show the goodies and the jewelry being offered.

9. You, your mom, her mom, etc. will help her put on the jewelry.

10. You and your fiancee will pour wine that YOU brought and offer to the elderly relatives of both sides.

11. Your fiancee's family will invite everyone to eat. They either cooked or had a restaurant cater food to their house.

12. The guests will leave, and your fiancee's family will return to you the trays with portions of the goodies in them.

13. Your family will return home.

Steps may be out of order due to my disappointing memory. Of course there are countless variants. It depends on her family's religion too. For example, her family may not have an altar - there's no need to light incense or bow. And other things.

It's a long answer to your short question. But as far as I know the ceremony always takes place at her house. Now SG-Can Tho is about half a day on the road (right?), so in your case you and your party could arrive in Can Tho first, maybe 1-2 days earlier, find a place to stay, start your final preparation there (wrapping the trays, buying fresh fruits, etc.), and start marching to her place early the next morning or something like that.

But your folks and her folks would know a whole lot more and give their inputs how they want to organize it.

Yup, this is how I know it too and how it took place for our Dam Hoi...

[dalegg 143]

Guys place- L.A. Oh, not possible, so Girls place Saigon.

[Tom99 0]

Thanks all for a quikie.