Separation while I 751 pending.

[Dreamer28 0]

Hello, dear members! 

I met my husband during exchange program at his university. We were pretty young at a time and we fell in love. He visited my country a few times and my family loved him. It was a dream come true. We wanted to be together and the best option was moving to US at that time. Unfortunately, he was still enrolled in college. We were young and poor so we had to live with his parents. We still do. Anyhow, throughout our marriage I happened to realize that he was completely unprepared to be married. He wouldn’t want to do any chores or cook, he preferred to live his kid life, going to school and working part-time at fast food chain. He is incredibly rude to his parents, who were so nice to let me stay with them. He locks himself in the room and won’t even talk to them and states that he hates them. He has been also doing bachelors for 7 years now and haven’t attempted to do a single internship. On his days off he just lays in bed and plays his games, with food waste all around him. Truly frustrating. Anyhow, slowly over time I just lost any respect for him. If a man calls his mom a and doesn’t want to do anything around the house, it is not the reliable partner I need and not a good example for future kids. We filed for I 751 in October 2018. We had all the proof young people can have like joint tax returns, shared bank accounts, pictures, letters from his parents.I wasn’t sure at a time how to leave, where to go, would his parents get mad at me and do something ( his dad has anger issues and alcohol problems). It is torturous to be around person I don’t like, or lying to his parents. He is aware that our relationship is over and I know he wants to be free too. I know I have to be separated for 6 months to be able to file a divorce in my state. I really want to move out as soon as possible. I guess my question would be how soon I should notify uscis that I’m separated. I know I won’t be able to even file for divorce for at least 6 months so how exactly would notifying uscis work. I am a graduate student, I can’t afford expensive lawyers. But I might try to get a consultation. 

Thank you so much for your help! 

[dumiduda1990 19]

So sorry you're going through this. I'm sure it is rough.

 

I filed in October 2018, and since then have separated too. I'm in the middle of a divorce and it will be finalized by end of July if everything goes smoothly.

 

Since you're asking about notifying USCIS, I am guessing that you want to switch to waiver eventually? Personally I don't think you need to notify USCIS right now. If they get notification, they will probably send you a RFE and you won't have the decree ready. Other people please correct me if I'm incorrect - it won't be too late to change to divorce waiver at the interview, and that will buy you more time to have the decree.

 

 

[Dreamer28 0]

4 minutes ago, sherriJoy said:

So sorry you're going through this. I'm sure it is rough.

 

I filed in October 2018, and since then have separated too. I'm in the middle of a divorce and it will be finalized by end of July if everything goes smoothly.

 

Since you're asking about notifying USCIS, I am guessing that you want to switch to waiver eventually? Personally I don't think you need to notify USCIS right now. If they get notification, they will probably send you a RFE and you won't have the decree ready. Other people please correct me if I'm incorrect - it won't be too late to change to divorce waiver at the interview, and that will buy you more time to have the decree.

 

 

Thank you so much for your response! Did you change your address for USCIS  when you guys got separated? Wonder if that makes USCIS suspicious in any way. Will you be switching to waiver once divorce is finalized? 

I wish you best of the luck! Unfortunately, it seems like quite  a wait for October filers, I am “lucky” enough to be processed by Nebraska. Hopefully you are getting processed by a more efficient office! 

[dumiduda1990 19]

3 minutes ago, Dreamer28 said:

Thank you so much for your response! Did you change your address for USCIS  when you guys got separated? Wonder if that makes USCIS suspicious in any way. Will you be switching to waiver once divorce is finalized? 

I wish you best of the luck! Unfortunately, it seems like quite  a wait for October filers, I am “lucky” enough to be processed by Nebraska. Hopefully you are getting processed by a more efficient office! 

 

I didn't change my address because my husband was the one who moved out, very suddenly... I'm in the middle of selling the house though and will update USCIS my address when I move to my new place. Thankfully in my case the divorce should be finalized before I move, and I am planning to submit a package to USCIS with my divorce decree to change it to divorce waiver.

 

Also, my case is assigned to Nebraska too! LOL. Good luck to us!!

 

 

[Eric-Pris 1,606]

Wow, sorry for your situation.  Sounds like you married a man child who never grew up.  7 years of undergrad?  Lots of people go to school for 7 years... they are called doctors and lawyers.      You sound like a motivated person with goals and dreams but he's a spoiled mama's boy who needs people to clean up after him.  Good that you are looking to get out before he brings you down too.

 

Other than changing your address so you can receive their letters, I wouldn't change anything more with USCIS at this time.  They may approve your 751 without an interview, not sure what the current wait times are.  If there is an interview, you can change to a waiver then.  

 

Good luck.

 

 

[Dreamer28 0]

32 minutes ago, Eric-Pris said:

Wow, sorry for your situation.  Sounds like you married a man child who never grew up.  7 years of undergrad?  Lots of people go to school for 7 years... they are called doctors and lawyers.      You sound like a motivated person with goals and dreams but he's a spoiled mama's boy who needs people to clean up after him.  Good that you are looking to get out before he brings you down too.

 

Other than changing your address so you can receive their letters, I wouldn't change anything more with USCIS at this time.  They may approve your 751 without an interview, not sure what the current wait times are.  If there is an interview, you can change to a waiver then.  

 

Good luck.

 

 

Thank you for your kind words! It means a lot to me. Yes, current wait times are insane in Nebraska. Anywhere between 15 to 25 months, which is quite a range. I’m only 8 months along the way so I might get divorced before my application gets approved. 

[LoveAlways2 90]

Hello,

First of all I am so sorry you are going through this. I was in a similar situation, If you look at my time line below. I did not notified USCIS until after the divorce was final. My reasoning for this was because I knew they will need the decree. When my divorce was final, I send them a package with my divorce, more evidence of our marriage until it ended, a letter of our therapist, and an affidavit from a friend. After I sent all that, I called to make sure they had received my documents, they sent me a letter stating that they had in fact added the information to my file. 

 

I got approved a few months later, no RFE no interview.

 

I wish you the best. I know how hard focusing on immigration issues is when the marriage is failing apart. It was a difficult time for me, but I am so much better now. Best of luck!

[Dreamer28 0]

4 hours ago, SadStories said:

Hello,

First of all I am so sorry you are going through this. I was in a similar situation, If you look at my time line below. I did not notified USCIS until after the divorce was final. My reasoning for this was because I knew they will need the decree. When my divorce was final, I send them a package with my divorce, more evidence of our marriage until it ended, a letter of our therapist, and an affidavit from a friend. After I sent all that, I called to make sure they had received my documents, they sent me a letter stating that they had in fact added the information to my file. 

 

I got approved a few months later, no RFE no interview.

 

I wish you the best. I know how hard focusing on immigration issues is when the marriage is failing apart. It was a difficult time for me, but I am so much better now. Best of luck!

Thank you! It definitely helps knowing that people go through same things. Your story gives me a lot of hope. I’m glad things are good for you now! 

[PolarPear 8]

9 hours ago, SadStories said:

Hello,

First of all I am so sorry you are going through this. I was in a similar situation, If you look at my time line below. I did not notified USCIS until after the divorce was final. My reasoning for this was because I knew they will need the decree. When my divorce was final, I send them a package with my divorce, more evidence of our marriage until it ended, a letter of our therapist, and an affidavit from a friend. After I sent all that, I called to make sure they had received my documents, they sent me a letter stating that they had in fact added the information to my file. 

 

I got approved a few months later, no RFE no interview.

 

I wish you the best. I know how hard focusing on immigration issues is when the marriage is failing apart. It was a difficult time for me, but I am so much better now. Best of luck!

SadStories, 

Can you please let us know what you send with your i751 and how long you were married?

[millefleur 5,046]

Really sorry to hear that you're in this situation but I can totally understand why you want to divorce and get out. In terms of seeking discounted legal aid, trying calling 2-1-1 in your area (looks like they also have a website in your state: https://www.211virginia.org/consumer/index.php). It's a social services referral hotline and should be able to refer you to legal aid in your area that is affordable/for low income people. They may be able to refer you to both family law and immigration law services at discounted/sliding scale rates...just depends on what's available in the area. Good luck!

[Dreamer28 0]

1 hour ago, millefleur said:

Really sorry to hear that you're in this situation but I can totally understand why you want to divorce and get out. In terms of seeking discounted legal aid, trying calling 2-1-1 in your area (looks like they also have a website in your state: https://www.211virginia.org/consumer/index.php). It's a social services referral hotline and should be able to refer you to legal aid in your area that is affordable/for low income people. They may be able to refer you to both family law and immigration law services at discounted/sliding scale rates...just depends on what's available in the area. Good luck!

Thank you! I will definitely try that! 

[Dreamer28 0]

So I talked to the immigration lawyer a week ago. She definitely advised me to move out and switch to the waiver. Basically, she told me to attach a personal letter saying that I’m separating with my spouse when I notify uscis of the change of an address. I was a little bit concerned about getting RFE with 87 days to reply but I won’t have my degree for at least 6 months. According to her, I can ask uscis for extension for like a year to submit all my final documents. I have read so many threads here but I haven’t seen anyone mention it. Do you guys know if that’s true and I can ask them to wait for me to submit my waiver? Explain that I need over 6 months to finalize the divorce? 

Edited July 21, 2019 by Dreamer28

[Pinkrlion 2,724]

5 hours ago, Dreamer28 said:

So I talked to the immigration lawyer a week ago. She definitely advised me to move out and switch to the waiver. Basically, she told me to attach a personal letter saying that I’m separating with my spouse when I notify uscis of the change of an address. I was a little bit concerned about getting RFE with 87 days to reply but I won’t have my degree for at least 6 months. According to her, I can ask uscis for extension for like a year to submit all my final documents. I have read so many threads here but I haven’t seen anyone mention it. Do you guys know if that’s true and I can ask them to wait for me to submit my waiver? Explain that I need over 6 months to finalize the divorce? 

If there is a request for additional evidence, and you do not provide the evidence, they will deny the I-751.  You can also refile after the denial and include the divorce decree.  

[Dreamer28 0]

Great news! I went ahead and moved out and sent a letter to uscis that we got separated. I still expressed my desire to be on the joint petition since it will take us a while to get the divorce degree. Today I got an update that my green card is being produced!!! Good luck to everyone who is still waiting! 

[azblk 338]

2 hours ago, Dreamer28 said:

Great news! I went ahead and moved out and sent a letter to uscis that we got separated. I still expressed my desire to be on the joint petition since it will take us a while to get the divorce degree. Today I got an update that my green card is being produced!!! Good luck to everyone who is still waiting! 

Congratulations.