My Experience and Anxiety

[JunkTardis 183]

22 hours ago, Harry M said:

It's been nine months since I've moved to the US on a K-1, eight months since I got married and nearly two months since my green card got approved. I've managed to get everything else set up, thanks in large part to my wonderful wife, bank accounts, secured credit card, Kentucky Driver's License and many other things which I now feel completely like an ordinary citizen now.

 

The job hunt has been good, have had three interviews and two job offers (one I turned down because the role wasn't what I expected). I'm about to accept one today, unless the other one offers me a role and I may take that one instead. After many months sitting at home in our apartment I think I've become too comfortable with home life. As much as I want to get back to work, it's also gonna be feel weird being employed once again. I left my previous job almost exactly a year ago, that way I'd have time to do all the stuff I wanted to do in the UK before I left.

 

I've seen people on here talk about how difficult the waiting around was for them, and it has been for me as well at times. I didn't have my car for the first few months so I was trapped in our apartment, we live in a complex and getting out wasn't so easy on foot. And when I did there isn't a lot around here that I hadn't already done from previous visits. But now that I'm close to going back to work and replenishing my shrinking savings that I made before coming over here, a wave of anxiety is coming over me. Part of the reason I rejected the first job offer was because I didn't feel confident doing that job (even though they saw something in me that I didn't lol).

 

Was this normal for anyone else? What advice would you give for going back to work, in a different country no less, after such a long period?

I totally get where you're coming from. Before leaving my job in September to move to the US in October, I used to work 70+ hours a week typically starting at 2pm and getting home at around 3am (pub kitchen work) and then going from that, to having squat to do was a massive change. I've put on weight, I feel I'm not as sharp as I was. I was lucky enough to have applied for my Missouri driver's license within a month of moving to the US so my i-90 was still valid to do so and I had SSN. And lucky for me, I was able to buy my wife's family's 'pass around' car for pretty cheap so I've had the freedom to at least get around, despite also living in an apartment complex near stores etc.

 

Now I know my GC interview is coming up, I am getting more and more anxious as to getting back into the rhythm of working again. I am hoping to work with my wife's company (they are one of the biggest IT based hirers in Kansas City) as they work Mon-Fri 8-5 normal hours with no weekend work (just what I need) and at good pay in something I enjoy. I've tried to avoid being too socially isolated, I've joined in on my wife's 'happy hour - friday night drinks with work' a few times and made a few friends there so I don't become too socially awkward. 

 

I am especially anxious working in a new country, especially when Americans in my experience are quite 'stiff' for want of a better word. I mean I'm used to the kinda talk you'd get in a pub kitchen, car sales room and mechanic's garage which is very very different. I've done office work in the UK too and the banter there was just the same as in the pub, but more polite. So yeah, I'd say perfectly normal to be anxious man. I'd say just get on with it, keep to yourself and build your confidence slowly and then when you feel like you're settling in a little, try making a few friends (if you don't make any naturally along the way). 

 

 

[Izor 79]

Almost 2 years working, still have crippling anxiety and fear of moving onto better things. Not sure it will ever go away lol. Living in the country, isolated from the real world sure leaves its marks.