sad weekend

[Turboguy 6]

James, RWG has gone way down hill since Spenser sold it. I was a little shocked at the value of a message board though. That one sold for 300 grand.

As far as the name check you have to remember you are dealing with the govt. I wish I could have had mine then instead of now. At least we would be together. This sucks.

[MissStacey 1]

Only have a couple of seconds here, but quickly....

Go to your local cops right now. Fill out an incident report or written statement of some kind. Sit down with the sergeant or the captain or whoever is in charge there (Sheriff, maybe?) and basically just tell them what's going on and that you want to cover your @$$ when it comes time to go to court.

9 times out of 10, these guys have seen something like this happen before, and will actually do what they can to help you out. If you can get your side of the story on paper with a legal signature "swearing" that it's the truth as told to them, that goes a long way when you go to court and it's just her and her lawyer (and probably her "guy that needed advice") there saying "he did this and he did that." You can counter with a sworn statement as witnessed by a cop that "she said I did this and said I did that, but I never did anything like that.... as a matter of fact, look at all the GOOD STUFF I did for her."

Make sure you cover your @$$ with good hard evidence. She was in a car crash, you bought her a new car. You paid for the chiropractor. You took care of her kids for 6 weeks while she was off chasing strange men. She obviously didn't miss family at home... she couldn't even take her kids with her. Things like this can paint a good picture in a judge's eye when it comes to domestic violence charges. She has to prove you did something, and that's pretty hard to do. It's VERY HARD to do when you've got proof that you've been nothing but an excellent husband/father.

Paint the picture that she's a money-grubbing green card scammer, and chances are, they'll see it too.

Keep us posted... GOOD LUCK!!!

And to everyone else out there..... there are signs. If you start to see them, don't deny you're seeing them. Don't say "I'm not jealous." Don't say "well, I'll give her the benefit of the doubt." DON'T DO THAT!!!! YOU'VE GOT TO COVER YOUR @$$. Do it now! She can love you all day every day, but if/when she changes her mind, you've gotta be ready! Love is great.... but it's got nothing to do with being successful if things go awry. You prepared hard to be together.... you should be as prepared to be apart!

This is really great advice.

What about also phoning USCIS and see if a Greencard had in fact been issued, or ask them if you can still cancel the AOS process?

I'm sorry you are going though this!!

[JamesT 12]

As far as the name check you have to remember you are dealing with the govt. I wish I could have had mine then instead of now. At least we would be together. This sucks.

I feel for you Turboguy, but at least you have the saving grace of being able to live together in Grenada while you wait it out. I certainly couldn't do anything like that since I have no money saved up, and if I quit my job I would have no income. On top of that, my monthly child support payment obligation would not stop if I moved out of the country for a few months. So unless I could immediately land a very good job in a place like Grenada, I could never do it.

[Danno 1,228]

I find it way hard to believe that 75% of ladies looking for a foreign guy are only interested in a green card. I admit I don't have much direct experience with visiting agencies but I have gottten to know a number of ladies who were listed in them.

While there are tons of girls, (or guys pretending to be girls) who are scammin men into sending money, I would be surprised if the actual number of ladies actually only looking for a mule to immigrate her is no more than 15%

Just do the numbers, all a woman would have to do is get the first guy to do a K-1 and then she would be off to america. If the agencies would be empty in no time because trust me guys do write and guys do visit, if the lady is only looking for a ticket she will not have to wait long.

Some one posted up stream that they only saw one drunk Russian man even though they have been there several times.

I think the "Bad russian man" line is greatly over played but to deny Russian men drink more and have a wife and a girlfriend is much more common there than in the USA.

The last time I was in St Petersburg I was walking to a Birthday party when I saw a 4 or 5 year old girl walking around near a play area carrying a Bottle of beer, drinking as she walked. The Russians with me kinda acted like it was sad and funny at the same time.

If you are the kind of guy that has ever been "duped" by an American girl.... you will get your ### tore up in Russia. If you are observant, perceptive and a good judge of character, you can find a real gem over there.

[bruc 0]

Speaking of forums.....I use to check in on a forum called the RWL,which I thought showed some arrogance and muscle flexing.

I recently tried to find the RWL and couldn't connect with it anymore.

Has it been desolved or had a name change....anyone Know?

bruc

[slim 1,523]

I find it way hard to believe that 75% of ladies looking for a foreign guy are only interested in a green card.

If you are the kind of guy that has ever been "duped" by an American girl.... you will get your ### tore up in Russia. If you are observant, perceptive and a good judge of character, you can find a real gem over there.

Although it's probably true that not as many as 75% of ladies are green card scammers, it's also probably true that 75% are "throwing their hat in the ring... and hoping for the best." That would mean even if things didn't work out, all-in-all they believe their chances of a better life (or a better man) are somewhere in the U.S., and getting that green card will help them out. It's pretty common for them to "try to make it work" for a couple years while lining up their next guy or saving up some money, etc. That may not be an outright scam, but it does push the numbers up for those that aren't 100% into it for the man, but moreover, the green card.

If you dig back through some of the old threads, you'll see my take on the three types of Russian/FSU women. Basically, they go like this:

1. Outright Scammer (related to American Gold Digger.... could be for green card, could be for money, could be for both!)

2. Hoper (Looking for a better life with a good man.... we'll see what happens.)

3. Gem (Only cares about the man. Could care less about if he's in Russia or the U.S.)

Your last statement was the most accurate summary of U.S./FSU relationships that I've ever seen! You obviously know and have spent time with more than a few Russian women.

[Thomas-n-Elena 0]

I just have to add that we all know at some point we have been duped, personally I admitted to my wife that I am a moron when it comes to women, you think I would know more I have 3 older sisters, no brothers, you would think I would have a clue, but I have always been the dreamer, always had hope and was willing to put myself out there and take a chance. Not to say Im a fool, if something seemed to good to be true it usually was. Actually if it hadnt been for a scam artist I wouldnt have met my wife. Its all serendipity.

You take the good you take the bad you take them both and there you have the facts of life. Everybody sing!!!!

[John24689 0]

Skinsfan, I am very sorry about your situation. Life ain't over and you can move forward. I have a few suggestions.

1. Get an Attorney NOW.

2. You can also check online with USCIS to see if the GC has been approved/issued. (Or call USCIS as suggested.)

3. Find witnesses who will testify about your good marriage - non-abusive. These can be family, neighbors, and others who know about your marriage and have been to your home or you both to thier home.

4. Start a Log about everything you can remember about what you have done for her and the children - new car, clothes, jewelry, money, flowers, dining out, etc. (Get receipts together for all you have done to include the trips for her to go home.)

5. Report her moving out to the police and show your concern because you have done nothing to cause her to move out.

6. Maybe, with advice from your attorney, report this to USCIS.

7. Do not even think about being with another woman even to just talk.

8. Do not get into a verbal argument with her. Bite you tongue. If you did shout or argue with her, it could be used against you as verbal and/or mental abuse. - Try and talk with her, if you can, with a witness or two.

9. Get witnesses for how good you treated the children while your wife was gone home. List all the things you did for them and what you did together.

I am sure there may be more, but this is all I can think of now. You will need all the information and witnesses you can get. Find out about the GC tomorrow and get an attorney tomorrow.

Good luck and I am keeping you in my prayers.

John

[russ 1]

sad stories like from Russ & Galina's, Marc & Olga, and now skinsfan.

I'm in Russia now and having a great time. The family here is wonderful. I'm frustrated by my Russian, but if I pay attention I can follow most conversations. To be honest, it is exhausting trying to keep up with 5 people talking at once. On the other hand, it is getting easier. I can certainly relate to how hard it is for Russians moving to America.

I wouldn't call it a sad story in my case. Everyone has problems, but patience will usually overcome them.

--

Skinsfan - about the hearing you metioned. What was the petition for? In what court? Judges are generally pretty liberal in granting DV injuctions, when they side with the respondent, the petition is usually frivilous. Even if there is no order, don't talk to your wife except in the presence of your lawyer.

Try and talk with her, if you can, with a witness or two.

I would absolutely not do this without your lawyer present.

[John and Anna 0]

I find it way hard to believe that 75% of ladies looking for a foreign guy are only interested in a green card.

If you are the kind of guy that has ever been "duped" by an American girl.... you will get your ### tore up in Russia. If you are observant, perceptive and a good judge of character, you can find a real gem over there.

Although it's probably true that not as many as 75% of ladies are green card scammers, it's also probably true that 75% are "throwing their hat in the ring... and hoping for the best." That would mean even if things didn't work out, all-in-all they believe their chances of a better life (or a better man) are somewhere in the U.S., and getting that green card will help them out. It's pretty common for them to "try to make it work" for a couple years while lining up their next guy or saving up some money, etc. That may not be an outright scam, but it does push the numbers up for those that aren't 100% into it for the man, but moreover, the green card.

If you dig back through some of the old threads, you'll see my take on the three types of Russian/FSU women. Basically, they go like this:

1. Outright Scammer (related to American Gold Digger.... could be for green card, could be for money, could be for both!)

2. Hoper (Looking for a better life with a good man.... we'll see what happens.)

3. Gem (Only cares about the man. Could care less about if he's in Russia or the U.S.)

Your last statement was the most accurate summary of U.S./FSU relationships that I've ever seen! You obviously know and have spent time with more than a few Russian women.

How can you tell....

1) Lies within lies within lies language barrier would make it hard for most to see the truth?

2) When the going get tough the though get going (their dream bubble has been burst.

3) Considering what is read here...

I propose to all. How do any of us know?

Any 20 year marriages here? 15? 10?

(Just stirring the pot)

[Turboguy 6]

There are a lot of very important steps you should be taking to protect yourself. I hope you got ahold of Maxx because he knows them all and can help you a lot.

I would suggest not contacting the USCIS. That would appear to your wife that you are trying to get her deported and may cause her to take more serious actions than she would otherwise. I have heard Maxx go over the steps for people many times. I know one is to never meet her alone in private without someone as a witness and to do the same on phone calls.

[slim 1,523]

How can you tell....

1) Lies within lies within lies language barrier would make it hard for most to see the truth?

2) When the going get tough the though get going (their dream bubble has been burst.

3) Considering what is read here...

I propose to all. How do any of us know?

Any 20 year marriages here? 15? 10?

(Just stirring the pot)

1) If she hasn't learned enough English to communicate effectively enough with you then she's not serious about you. If there's no language barrier at all (as in, she's "professional" enough to have taken classes already) it should be easy to weed out the lies. It's easy enough with American women, right?

2) That's where time comes in. Plus, it should've already been hard enough on her to prove that she's willing to "stick around" for a little while. "Hi, how are you, here's $4000 and a K-1 visa...." and then six months later, "I don't know why it didn't work out." It should've sounded more like "She spent her money to come meet me at this place, waited for X number of months/years, and did without anything nice for a long time.... just to be together with me." That just may be followed by "and now we've been married 10 years."

3) Consider what is read here. There are a lot of guys on here that set themselves up for failure. They themselves are "taking a shot" and then when it comes back around on them, most will say it was because the women did this or the women did that, etc. The guys on here recently have, for lack of a better term, sacked up and taken responsibility for what's been going on, but there are plenty of guys out there that have met a girl through a website, went to go see her, then been married six months later. Do that in the U.S. and see how far that gets you. Do it in Russia, and it's almost guaranteed to not work.

A) That said, there are amazing stories on here about people that happened to meet and fall in love, even if it was only a few months before they got married.

It's got to be up to you and your S/O to be true with what you expect and what you're looking for. And don't sugar coat it. If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck.... call it a duck! The girls certainly will!!!

[kud 0]

I find it way hard to believe that 75% of ladies looking for a foreign guy are only interested in a green card.

If you are the kind of guy that has ever been "duped" by an American girl.... you will get your ### tore up in Russia. If you are observant, perceptive and a good judge of character, you can find a real gem over there.

Although it's probably true that not as many as 75% of ladies are green card scammers, it's also probably true that 75% are "throwing their hat in the ring... and hoping for the best." That would mean even if things didn't work out, all-in-all they believe their chances of a better life (or a better man) are somewhere in the U.S., and getting that green card will help them out. It's pretty common for them to "try to make it work" for a couple years while lining up their next guy or saving up some money, etc. That may not be an outright scam, but it does push the numbers up for those that aren't 100% into it for the man, but moreover, the green card.

If you dig back through some of the old threads, you'll see my take on the three types of Russian/FSU women. Basically, they go like this:

1. Outright Scammer (related to American Gold Digger.... could be for green card, could be for money, could be for both!)

2. Hoper (Looking for a better life with a good man.... we'll see what happens.)

3. Gem (Only cares about the man. Could care less about if he's in Russia or the U.S.)

Your last statement was the most accurate summary of U.S./FSU relationships that I've ever seen! You obviously know and have spent time with more than a few Russian women.

How can you tell....

1) Lies within lies within lies language barrier would make it hard for most to see the truth?

2) When the going get tough the though get going (their dream bubble has been burst.

3) Considering what is read here...

I propose to all. How do any of us know?

Any 20 year marriages here? 15? 10?

(Just stirring the pot)

Well, It hasn't been 20 yrs, but my Wife just sold her Moscow Condo and I am responsible to investing the Money for our future.... yep she is scamming me for the green card :whistle:

[John and Anna 0]

How can you tell....

1) Lies within lies within lies language barrier would make it hard for most to see the truth?

2) When the going get tough the though get going (their dream bubble has been burst.

3) Considering what is read here...

I propose to all. How do any of us know?

Any 20 year marriages here? 15? 10?

(Just stirring the pot)

1) If she hasn't learned enough English to communicate effectively enough with you then she's not serious about you. If there's no language barrier at all (as in, she's "professional" enough to have taken classes already) it should be easy to weed out the lies. It's easy enough with American women, right?

2) That's where time comes in. Plus, it should've already been hard enough on her to prove that she's willing to "stick around" for a little while. "Hi, how are you, here's $4000 and a K-1 visa...." and then six months later, "I don't know why it didn't work out." It should've sounded more like "She spent her money to come meet me at this place, waited for X number of months/years, and did without anything nice for a long time.... just to be together with me." That just may be followed by "and now we've been married 10 years."

3) Consider what is read here. There are a lot of guys on here that set themselves up for failure. They themselves are "taking a shot" and then when it comes back around on them, most will say it was because the women did this or the women did that, etc. The guys on here recently have, for lack of a better term, sacked up and taken responsibility for what's been going on, but there are plenty of guys out there that have met a girl through a website, went to go see her, then been married six months later. Do that in the U.S. and see how far that gets you. Do it in Russia, and it's almost guaranteed to not work.

A) That said, there are amazing stories on here about people that happened to meet and fall in love, even if it was only a few months before they got married.

It's got to be up to you and your S/O to be true with what you expect and what you're looking for. And don't sugar coat it. If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck.... call it a duck! The girls certainly will!!!

Bravo - again

Are u telling some of us to duck

Yes - it's the whole story we need to see. There is another post going on about summer vacation that has Anna and I interested.

I'll tune in there a bit.

Hope all is well Mr. and Mrs Slim

[Lovetoteach 53]

I'm sorry with all you are going through. It saddens me to think you were duped. It's seems unjust that such scammers are able to get through this and obtain greencards whilst people like me came here to marry a man I truly loved only to be abused by him. My case is totally genuine with lots of evidence of mental abuse yet I'm probably going to denied. I never lied about being pyhsically abused by him to obtain police records becasue I was not. In fact I was so under his control that I was infact too scared to even do so when his mother hit me. I did visit the police and spoke to them but could not make a formal complaint due to the repercussuions that would have entailed.

shona