A Broken Journey

[~Jackie~ 30]

Anybody up for some chocolate flavored Midol?

J

[peezey 0]

Nothing in there about hitting, beating, or bruising someone else during any of the stages.

Umm of course? Because that's not whom I was replying to Peezy. Amanda also did not mention anything about any of these things.

Nope, she didn't. She did compare so called dark moods, though, which while they can be attributed to culture shock, I guess, certainly doesn't have anything to do with wife beating. I wasn't commenting on your comment, I was commenting on the general idea that most of us seem pretty clear on, and that is, no matter what is going on with someone, abuse of any kind isn't warranted or acceptable.

Edited May 30, 2007 by peezey

[~Jackie~ 30]

Warranted? No. Acceptable? Not every Dv case ends in an immediate divorce or separation. One can say all they want what they THINK they would do in this situation, but it is definately not that cut and dried. I married Mohammed for eternity. We are a muslim couple and I think if this pertained to us, we would seek counseling together.

Jackie

[brnidokiegurl 0]

This is true, everyone can complain, express, argue etc she has to be allowed to do for herself. Does anyone have to agree? no, We can all hope the best and give courage to make the right decisions but in the end it has to be the decisions they make for themselves. Friends and family can not live anothers life, it has to be their realiziation to make the change Been there done that from both sides, the one receiving advice and the one giving advice.

[peezey 0]

Warranted? No. Acceptable? Not every Dv case ends in an immediate divorce or separation. One can say all they want what they THINK they would do in this situation, but it is definately not that cut and dried. I married Mohammed for eternity. We are a muslim couple and I think if this pertained to us, we would seek counseling together.

Jackie

Considering being muslim has nothing to do with this situation, nor does getting counseling, especially since a "muslim marriage" would never contain nor accept domestic violence, I'm not quite sure what your point is in throwing that bit in. And why does counseling equal acceptance of such in a marriage?

Edited May 30, 2007 by peezey

[~Jackie~ 30]

Oh come on. Get real. Are you actually expecting us to believe a muslim man would not ever hit his wife. Take off those rose-colored glasses, they are clouding your vision. To be honest, I don't hardly ever see your point.

Jackie

[LaL 418]

please do not to attack each other, this topic has potential to get everyone very heated and concerned. Let's try to remain civil.

thanks.

[peezey 0]

Oh come on. Get real. Are you actually expecting us to believe a muslim man would not ever hit his wife. Take off those rose-colored glasses, they are clouding your vision. To be honest, I don't hardly ever see your point.

Jackie

You're not getting it. You said you'd seek counseling because you are a muslim couple, as if that in some way makes you different from people who aren't or it is more incumbent on you to seek counseling because of your religion. My point is, if being muslim makes people different, there wouldn't be domestic violence in muslim marriages, since it is totally against Islam to behave in such a way. Obviously this is a ridiculous assumption to make, because clearly muslims DO engage in domestic violence. So again, what is the point of adding "muslim" to your statment? Do you feel because you are muslim you should seek counseling with an abuser while staying in relationship with said abuser? That muslim women should "try harder" to stay together no matter the circumstances?

There are no rose-colored glasses here, just trying very hard to understand what you are saying.

[sarah and hicham 3]

Warranted? No. Acceptable? Not every Dv case ends in an immediate divorce or separation. One can say all they want what they THINK they would do in this situation, but it is definately not that cut and dried. I married Mohammed for eternity. We are a muslim couple and I think if this pertained to us, we would seek counseling together.

Jackie

Oh dear.

[Sofiyya 1,687]

Please try to remember that this thread is about Jean and Moh. Jean is the one who will decide what is best for her. To be supportive of her, it's best not to argue among ourselves.

[Marry American 0]

Warranted? No. Acceptable? Not every Dv case ends in an immediate divorce or separation. One can say all they want what they THINK they would do in this situation, but it is definately not that cut and dried. I married Mohammed for eternity. We are a muslim couple and I think if this pertained to us, we would seek counseling together.

Jackie

[Marry American 0]

Warranted? No. Acceptable? Not every Dv case ends in an immediate divorce or separation. One can say all they want what they THINK they would do in this situation, but it is definately not that cut and dried. I married Mohammed for eternity. We are a muslim couple and I think if this pertained to us, we would seek counseling together.

Jackie

Oh dear.

Is that your best reponse to this post?? 'oh dear', what does that mean?

[~Jackie~ 30]

I may have been wrong in stating we have a 'muslim' marriage. But since I'm not Jewish or another religion, I can only speak from our experience. I know all marriages go into it for the long haul, I was just stating that in OUR case, it is forever. I wish I could say that IF he did this I would leave, not so sure. So go ahead and pick apart my words, I know what I meant, and according to the many PM's I have gotten from online friends here, they get it too.

It is a damn shame that Jean was strong enough to come here and reach out to the few people that might understand. And for her thread to go bad, really upsets me. But bullies will be bullies.

Not sure who I am quoting but here goes: To have a friend you must BE a friend. Thank you to all my buddies here on VJ.

Jackie

[Ban Hammer 13,445]

I may have been wrong in stating we have a 'muslim' marriage. But since I'm not Jewish or another religion, I can only speak from our experience. I know all marriages go into it for the long haul, I was just stating that in OUR case, it is forever. I wish I could say that IF he did this I would leave, not so sure. So go ahead and pick apart my words, I know what I meant, and according to the many PM's I have gotten from online friends here, they get it too.

It is a damn shame that Jean was strong enough to come here and reach out to the few people that might understand. And for her thread to go bad, really upsets me. But bullies will be bullies.

Not sure who I am quoting but here goes: To have a friend you must BE a friend. Thank you to all my buddies here on VJ.

Jackie

you were not wrong to say you have a muslim marriage nor were you wrong in anything else you said. i find it extremely sad that at a time like this some must bicker and quibble about something trivial rather than unite and give her support and understanding.

[morocco4ever 63]

My heart aches for you Jean. You will be in my prayers.