A Broken Journey

[Together4ever 1]

This is another type of visa tale. While most write their "happily ever after" stories and experiences here, I am writing another type of story. Consider it part of my healing. I am tired of hiding. I refuse to be a victim even though I still have some pretty weak moments where I go off and cry rivers of self pity.

Most of you know the story of our visa journey. I lived almost a year in Egypt with Mohammed. We were as happy as Egypt would allow us to be. Our relationship grew strong and tight. I was forced to leave Egypt and return to the USA to rebuild my life with nothing but the suitcase I was lugging behind me on the promise I would bring him here. He was in the same boat in Egypt. I worked through my heartbreak to begin building my life, finding a job, securing a job and a car and as much sanity as I could muster so I could get him here as soon as possible. I missed him terribly and we were both in pretty desperate situations.

A year and a half after I had to leave him crying in the airport, his visa was granted and he arrived in the USA. Three days later we were married. AOS was filed. We happily made our plans for the future. Unfortunately this is where my story takes a turn.

Mohammed started acting very strangely. He would crawl off alone and sulk. When I would finally get him to tell me what was wrong he would give me some fairytale scenario about my plans to dump him, or something else equally ridiculous and I would explain endlessly these things were his own manifestations and not true. These episodes got worse. I realized he was placing blame on me for his own fears and frustrations as he struggled to adjust. I talked myself blue. Some days he would relax and be himself. Most days his mood was foul and his temper horrible and I found myself becoming more and more nervous. That's when he started hitting me.

Five times I suffered through his bruisings, each time was worse then the time before. Each time I would find myself getting more and more angry as my bruises throbbed reminding me what I sacrificed for him and that it was not returned. Tuesday was the last straw. As I suffered his hammering fists he punched me in the chest as hard as he could, right exactly where my heart is. It knocked the breath out of me and as I got up off the floor I made a decision. I called the police.

They took him away in cuffs. My bruises were photographed by an uncaring female police officer and I was given a rather stern talking to by the paramedics and the first police officer that arrived. "He will do it again." Those are the words stuck in my darkest nightmares now.

He is in jail. I was assured he would be released the next day at the time of his arrest, my family all but forced me to file the restraining order to protect myself and still it was not my will to do it. The next morning I discovered he was placed on $3,000 bond. He did something stupid I'm sure. This is not "normal". I will face him in court in a week and I have no idea what to expect or even what to do. I am financially ruined. I have no way to bail him out.

All I know is I'm alone again. My body is covered in bruises and it still hurts to take a deep breath. My husband... my god I sent my husband to JAIL. The man I yearned for, longed for, cried for, fought for and waited for... is now in jail. I cannot find the proper words to explain even how that feels. Medication helps me live with myself. I don't know what to do now.

I really don't want advice. I've already heard it all. It all just makes an ugly smelly mud between my ears that keeps me awake at night. I would not wish this on anyone and my prayers are that all who are awaiting their reunions are blessed with happy and wonderful lives. Thank you for reading my words. As I said, this is my way of attempting to heal and bring sense to the chaos my life has become.

[brnidokiegurl 0]

[MaydayDas 1]

You are a strong beautiful woman I pray for you to have the strength to find your happiness and peace in your heart.

[Jenn! 918]

I am so sorry that you have had to endure this. Please do whatever you need to do protect yourself. I hope you are able to confide in your family about this and that they can help you through this time.

[doodlebug 3]

Oh honey words cannot describe how much I want to hug you (gently) right now and just take you under my wing until you heal.

You don't need to be quiet at all. Vent all you want here. Let it out and let us hold you and comfort you in this time of need. I can only imagine what you are feeling because I have such a pit in my stomach and tears are streaming down my face reading this. I'm in shock. Complete shock.

You dont' have to answer this but did you see any signs that you just brushed into the back of your mind before? I think it's important for others to know what to look for, you know?

Have you been to a doctor? If not please go because you could have internal bleeding and not even know it. This isn't anything to mess with.

I don't know the technical aspects of getting him back to Egypt but I would work on that NOW while he's in jail and you are safe. That way once he gets out of jail you can have the wheels already in motion.

Again.....................I am so so sorry for you hon. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.

[Sofiyya 1,687]

WOW! What courage it took to post your story, Jean. I'm so, so very sorry this is happening to you. I don't know what else to say except I will make dua for you. You are much cared for here and you will not have to endure this alone.

[Zee Bee 61]

I am so sorry this happened to you. May you find the strength to persevere through what is an unimaginably hard situation.

You are in my prayers.

[~Jackie~ 30]

You will be in my prayers.

Thank you for being brave enough to share this with the group. You are not alone. Stay strong.

Jackie

[melly 0]

I'm so sad to read about this. I will keep you in my dua. Remember we are here for you.

[sarah and hicham 3]

Jean I am in shock. I am sorry to hear this. I think it's best that you can't bail him out. Good luck in the future and of course we're all here for you.

[Jenn! 918]

All I know is I'm alone again. My body is covered in bruises and it still hurts to take a deep breath. My husband... my god I sent my husband to JAIL. The man I yearned for, longed for, cried for, fought for and waited for... is now in jail. I cannot find the proper words to explain even how that feels. Medication helps me live with myself. I don't know what to do now.

I just wanted to add that this is not your fault. You sent your husband to jail to protect yourself. You did what you had to do, Jean, and please do not question whether you did the right thing.

[Aymerlu 3]

You are a wonderful women Jean. I wish there was a way I could take all your hurt away. {{{{{HUGS}}}}}

[sarah and hicham 3]

All I know is I'm alone again. My body is covered in bruises and it still hurts to take a deep breath. My husband... my god I sent my husband to JAIL. The man I yearned for, longed for, cried for, fought for and waited for... is now in jail. I cannot find the proper words to explain even how that feels. Medication helps me live with myself. I don't know what to do now.

I just wanted to add that this is not your fault. You sent your husband to jail to protect yourself. You did what you had to do, Jean, and please do not question whether you did the right thing.

I agree. You did the right thing.

[ya falaha! 0]

I can't express enough how sorry I am to hear this. You are an incredibly strong woman. Like Jenn said, you did what you did to protect yourself. You are not at fault. My thoughts and prayers are with you, Jean

[LaL 418]

Jean, I have huge tears welling up as I read this. I cannot begin to express how sorry I feel.