Divorce during 2 year Green Card

[Paul1989 1]

I honestly never thought it would come to this. I am a two year green card holder (Husband) my wife is the US citizen. I came here on a K1 visa, got married in December 2016 I applied and received a 2 year green card in August 2017 with no interview. Our marriage has now broken down after a long period of arguments and fighting. My wife gave birth to our son 5 months ago and things have not been good for at lest the last year. Ive asked her to come to therapy but she thinks it won't help. I've tried so many different things that just haven't worked. Im at my wits in and just cant figure out what to do. Ive put on so much weight from just being anxious all the time and depressed. Ive told my wife Im going to set up marriage therapy this week hoping she will come and try to sort out this mess. If she doesn't I just cant do this anymore. 

 

I would love to just go home to my own country but I love my son so much and want to be in his life as much as Im legally allowed. For this reason I want to stay in the US. Is it possible for me to file on my own for the 10 year green card? I have read lots about divorce waivers but are they successful? Our marriage was not a scam I'm not worried about that part. I have amazed hundreds of pages of proof of a legitimate marriage. My 10 year GC window opens up in May but Im still married and we haven't filed paper work yet for divorce, GC expires mid August.Can you get an extension from USCS will they wait for a divorce waiver? In my state they have an 90 waiting period before they will grant a divorce. I don't want to be in the country illegal and cause Ice agents to come knocking on my door. Basically i'm just looking for some information from people how have gone through this and experiences of dealing with USCIS. 

 

 

Edited February 12, 2019 by Paul1989

[Boiler 45,564]

Sounds like you will be OK with the Divorce Waiver and they will basically put it one side until you get the Divorce sorted.

[Ontarkie 14,234]

Since you sound like you want to work on your marriage I'm going to comment on that part. 

Your wife just had a baby 5 months ago. It is very possible she has postpartum depression. If she doesn't want marriage counseling ask her in the most honest but supportive way possible to speak to her doctor about PPD. She is very much in that stage that this could be it.  You say things have been bad for about a year. Sounds like the stress of adjusting as a couple, pregnancy and new baby might have been too much on both of you. That is a lot of changes in a short time. Some ppl can handle change better then others.

 

I'm going to go out on a limb and say give it time. Get counseling even if just for you. You can learn skills for communicating that can help diffuse things. 

 

[Jeanne Adil 1,651]

3 minutes ago, Ontarkie said:

Since you sound like you want to work on your marriage I'm going to comment on that part. 

Your wife just had a baby 5 months ago. It is very possible she has postpartum depression. If she doesn't want marriage counseling ask her in the most honest but supportive way possible to speak to her doctor about PPD. She is very much in that stage that this could be it.  You say things have been bad for about a year. Sounds like the stress of adjusting as a couple, pregnancy and new baby might have been too much on both of you. That is a lot of changes in a short time. Some ppl can handle change better then others.

 

I'm going to go out on a limb and say give it time. Get counseling even if just for you. You can learn skills for communicating that can help diffuse things. 

 

totally agree 

a man has no idea what our hormones do when pregnant

we get happy/we get sad

we get cold/we get hot

we get depressed

if you can not speak to her easily,   go talk to her mother /mother's love to be the one to advise/ it makes us powerful and still in  touch with our kids

maybe her mother or an aunt (who has grown to respect u )  can talk to her and help

 

also go to a dr or the marriage counselor and get info from them about postpartum depression /just leave the phamplet out on a table for her to see

sometimes we are hardheaded and can't talk of these issues

 

seems immigration  would be far more impressed if you tried to save your family

 

 

 

[Rapha85 6]

So sorry for you man. Just like someone said before, maybe it’s too much pressure for you both at the moment. Give it time, or give eachother some space for a little while. If It really doesn’t work out, try to keep it civil. Your son needs you both in his life. Try to be coparents and try to live close to him eventough you miss your own country. It would be even worse if you’re in your own country far away from your son. Kids are everything, and are number 1 priority. I have 2 kids myself so I know. Peace

[TBoneTX 45,329]

I was going to comment on the pregnancy aspect, from the standpoint of being the husband.

In short, women can turn into Heaven Knows What when pregnant.

Mrs. T-B. turned into that, lasting for the first trimester.

I was bewildered, walking on eggshells, and often frightened.  Fortunately, she had no postpartum depression.

But every woman is different, and no one knows to what extent until it actually happens.

It can probably even vary from pregnancy to pregnancy.

 

I strongly echo the recommendations above to seek joint or individual counseling, for the reasons stated.

Let us know how things go.