Residency without signing I864

[K1visaHopeful 2,779]

1 minute ago, Illiria said:

Refusing to file is not in itself abuse, using it as a threat against her to keep her in line yes that is abuse but simply telling her he has decided not to file or that he has decided not to marry is not abuse. 

Do you honestly believe that's how he is going about it? This guy has classic Narcissist written all over him. That's why I advise the beneficiary of she ever gets the chance to read this, to document everything.

[mushroomspore 3,043]

31 minutes ago, PirateLiker said:

My K1 fiance has been in the US for about 2 months. I was very concerned about the open ended/blank check aspect of signing I864 before she arrived, and my misgivings about this haven't changed. I am considering a couple of options.

 

A. Allow her to stay with me without marriage. I realize that in doing so she would become an undocumented resident.

 

B. Marry her but not sign I864. In so doing I realize she would not be able to adjust status, but I believe she would be a documented resident.

 

Am I more or less correct in my understanding of these two paths?

 

I live in an area of the country that is very friendly to undocumented residents. In fact,  a former GF was an undocumented immigrant. She has a job (albeit low wage), driver's license, access to health care etc. Under either scenario, A or B, I am quite certain she would be able to work and have a driver's license.   

 

I am completely aware that she is a person with the ability to make her own choices. If I tell her what I am willing to do, she can choose what is best for her. 

 

Considering reactions to a related post a couple months ago, I am not necessarily expecting very civil comments in this thread. 

I'm sorry but you are a fool for thinking your wife will be safe as an illegal immigrant even though your area is "nice" to them. It was also foolish to go down this path when you already had misgivings about the I-864. 

 

Since you don't get it, here it is: Marriage alone does not grant her any legal status.if she does not file adjustment, she is ILLEGAL, PERIOD, and at risk for deportation. Either bite the bullet and sign the I-864 or pay for her flight back to her home country. She doesn't deserve to have her entire legal situation jeopardized forever in the US just because you couldn't do some research and get over the I-864. We or our spouses have all signed it here and we're all fine.

[Roel 7,192]

I wonder if OP seriously expected any positive comments. That would be hilarious. 

[Ben&Zian 4,397]

As many others, including myself have noted... finish the process or be upfront with her and let her go home. Honestly if you're that worried and have been, it isn't going to get better, but don't hold her at bay because of it. I never had a worry or doubt with my husband and even if something happened and we were to separate, I know he can support himself fully and be independent. I have no worry about owing anyone anything because I have confidence in him. If you lack that confidence in your fiance, stop now and end the process in the appropriate way.

[mushroomspore 3,043]

2 minutes ago, Roel said:

I wonder if OP seriously expected any positive comments. That would be hilarious. 

I'm shaking my freaking head over here. I understand being unsure at the very beginning when you don't know anything. But what kind of adult just blindly goes through with a major life decision with his/her SPOUSE while STILL having doubts? Jfc. Sorry but this is the picture of stupidity. 

 

Not sorry.

 

I feel bad for OP's wife. She doesn't deserve this.

Edited January 22, 2019 by mushroomspore

[Daniela M_______ 409]

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Edited January 22, 2019 by Daniela M_______

[Going through 5,669]

Is not often I find myself at a loss for words.

 

I can't even begin to understand the recesses of your mind.

 

I can't even....like I want so much to try to help you in some way....but I can't even fathom what you are thinking at this point.

 

All I can hope is that this woman is already making plans to return to her home country, instead of willingly falling into an even BIGGER mess you will be creating for her, not only emotionally, and financially (since she won't be able to work), but also legally (since, y'know, she could end up in a holding cell).

 

 

[jakejon 1,197]

Why is the OP even with this woman? Why let her come if you weren't sure? IMO both your options suck!! Let the fiance move on with her life and you too 

[Crazy Cat 41,456]

This original post sounds a lot like human slave traffic, imo.

[mushroomspore 3,043]

2 minutes ago, missileman said:

This original post sounds a lot like human slave traffic, imo.

That or OP is just manipulative and abusive as it's clear he wants to keep his wife here but without getting the "authorities" involved and having the legal responsibility put upon him. What kind of spouse thinks that way? Jeez.

[afortunada 182]

In this day and age, can't anyone figure out where this guy is from/who he is so we can contact his "fiancee" and help her get away from this terrible person? This is getting to be absolutely ridiculous.

 

I can't tell if you're a troll or if this is real. But, to answer your question, neither option is valid. Buy her a ticket home and stop this nonsense.

[afortunada 182]

26 minutes ago, Illiria said:

Refusing to file is not in itself abuse, using it as a threat against her to keep her in line yes that is abuse but simply telling her he has decided not to file or that he has decided not to marry is not abuse. 

Financial abuse is very real. What are her choices if he is withholding money to buy her a plane ticket home, or if he is refusing to help support her financially knowing full well she will be an undocumented immigrant with no way to help herself?

[Going through 5,669]

From your last thread....

 

She gave up her apartment.

She gave up her stable, established career.

She gave up her car.

 

I'm sure she'll be THRILLED to hear your option of her doing all that so she can sit in your house, never work legally, and be always up for deportation at any time for the rest of her life in the US.

 

I think I have a pretty good notion of why you want to keep your options "open" with this woman here, but I'm trying to prevent myself from being reprimanded.

[Illiria 980]

3 minutes ago, afortunada said:

Buy her a ticket home and stop this nonsense.

 

He wasn’t even going to do that himself but asked friends to. Basically it’s one giant mess and he won’t stand up and end it. 

[mushroomspore 3,043]

1 minute ago, Illiria said:

 

He wasn’t even going to do that himself but asked friends to. Basically it’s one giant mess and he won’t stand up and end it. 

I was just about to post this because I looked through his profile and remembered seeing that thread when it happened. That was only 6 weeks ago. On top of the stupidity, he is a coward too. Class act.