does it affect my VAWA case if i have a baby with other guy during marriage

[debbiedoo 2,339]

ok.

[geowrian 22,337]

[EM_Vandaveer 2,408]

34 minutes ago, geowrian said:

This. Let's stop arguing about biology. Fact is, you CAN get pregnant any day of your cycle, it's just (much) less likely to happen on certain days. It's not impossible on any given day, though (barring fertility problems).

[TBoneTX 45,329]

A post that continued the bickering has been removed.

No more talk about the science of pregnancy in this thread.

[jacobamanda63 28]

I am back here again. I have been read each one of replies of you guys . No matter good words or not, Thanks for all of you. 

 I did not told ex boyfriend about this baby , but since I read some replies here then I think I need to letting him knows. 

Unfortunately he said this is not his baby and he said I need to raise this baby with my abuser ex husband. It can not happens because the results already showed he is not the father and no any responsibilities for this baby. 

I did asked ex boyfriend to do paternity test  but he did refused it. I told him that I will make court order to make him does this paternity test if he does not do it.  So he bought a DNA test kit from walmart and did it. of course the result showed he is NOT the father. I really did not had another guy . only my abuser husband and him( just once). 

 I am very up set , I believe he did changed his simple because he asked me stay in the car and he took his simple to his mother . they did body moves and did not letting me see what they did. Then I am going throw the county to ask him to redo paternity test . 

He is very mad and texted me about will get a attorney take this baby away from me. I said , you try.  Then he said will have half custody if his , I said that is good because this baby needs loves from his father. but he said will sign a form and give up the parental rights and will  not pay one cent child support. I said that is fine with me but I do need child support. His sound likes I can do nothing about it if he give up the parental rights . is that true?

  anyway , I am waiting for result . His appointment is on 20th. 

  I totally lost. 

  Does my VAWA case will be denied ? if so , can I bring this baby go with me. I can not live without of this baby. 

  thanks for you all. 

  May God bless you. 

 

[lierre 224]

I hope you can have the baby with you. I believe you could since no one else seems to want to claim the baby. 

[jacobamanda63 28]

2 minutes ago, lierre said:

I hope you can have the baby with you. I believe you could since no one else seems to want to claim the baby. 

Thanks so much for your supporting words . that really makes me feel better. I am very worries a lot  about my VAWA case and this baby . Kind like  my life all messed up . 

[lierre 224]

4 minutes ago, jacobamanda63 said:

Thanks so much for your supporting words . that really makes me feel better. I am very worries a lot  about my VAWA case and this baby . Kind like  my life all messed up . 

 

I hope you have people supporting you.

 

 

[Boiler 45,559]

So who is the Father?

[Going through 5,671]

6 hours ago, jacobamanda63 said:

Then he said will have half custody if his , I said that is good because this baby needs loves from his father. but he said will sign a form and give up the parental rights and will  not pay one cent child support.

The ex boyfriend can't have his cake and eat it too, as the saying goes.  If he gives up his parental rights, he can't have half legal custody at the same time.  No judge would award the father joint physical custody or sole custody if the father signs paperwork giving up his legal rights.  

 

Generally, in most States, child support is not automatically terminated when a mother/father voluntarily gives up parental rights either (unless the termination is so that someone else, like a stepparent, can legally adopt the child).  Under most jurisdictions, the legal rights a parent has to the child (like child visitation, making health/education decisions) is separate from the legal obligations they have (like child support, providing for their physical well-being).  Courts generally do not allow a parent to give up their legal right just to avoid having to pay child support.

 

It is good that you have a lawyer to help you.  Is your lawyer also an immigration lawyer?

[jacobamanda63 28]

8 hours ago, lierre said:

 

I hope you have people supporting you.

 

 

Thanks !

[jacobamanda63 28]

2 hours ago, Going through said:

The ex boyfriend can't have his cake and eat it too, as the saying goes.  If he gives up his parental rights, he can't have half legal custody at the same time.  No judge would award the father joint physical custody or sole custody if the father signs paperwork giving up his legal rights.  

 

Generally, in most States, child support is not automatically terminated when a mother/father voluntarily gives up parental rights either (unless the termination is so that someone else, like a stepparent, can legally adopt the child).  Under most jurisdictions, the legal rights a parent has to the child (like child visitation, making health/education decisions) is separate from the legal obligations they have (like child support, providing for their physical well-being).  Courts generally do not allow a parent to give up their legal right just to avoid having to pay child support.

 

It is good that you have a lawyer to help you.  Is your lawyer also an immigration lawyer?

I did not explained well. He actually does not want to pay child support. that is why he said will get an attorney to take away baby from me to scary me off ; I told him , You try. so he think I am not worry about that part. so he said will half of custody , I said ok, he thought I don't want to share custody with him.  I said okay with both of his options because I know he has no idea how to take care of baby. He needs go to work and have no time for baby for sure. 

then he said will give up the parental rights up , so he does not need to pay for child support. it does not means he wants half custody and give up the parental rights . He just dont want to pay child support that is why he is willing give up his parental rights. 

   I said i am okay he give up parental rights but I still need he to pay child support. 

 

   anyway , he try hard to get way from any responsibilities for this baby.  

  I do not  have immigration attorney now ; and I do  not have attorney for this case . but I went to department of social service family service and told them he might be the father since my ex abuser husband not the father. then they let me filed some forms and sent to him. 

  He is very mad , he thought first fake DNA test will stop me to do the 2nd one. I did not wanted to against him , I thought he will be happy to know he has a baby but he is not. 

   some one replied for me here ealier and said I am very selfish that dont want to let him know he has a baby. that I owe my baby and ex bf a chance to getting to know each other and love each other. 

  I thought that is right , then I tried to share joy from have this baby with ex bf but he is not happy to has this baby and pays child support. 

  Thanks guys. have a wonderful day today. 

[Orangesapples 1,954]

11 hours ago, jacobamanda63 said:

I did not explained well. He actually does not want to pay child support. that is why he said will get an attorney to take away baby from me to scary me off ; I told him , You try. so he think I am not worry about that part. so he said will half of custody , I said ok, he thought I don't want to share custody with him.  I said okay with both of his options because I know he has no idea how to take care of baby. He needs go to work and have no time for baby for sure. 

then he said will give up the parental rights up , so he does not need to pay for child support. it does not means he wants half custody and give up the parental rights . He just dont want to pay child support that is why he is willing give up his parental rights. 

   I said i am okay he give up parental rights but I still need he to pay child support. 

 

   anyway , he try hard to get way from any responsibilities for this baby.  

  I do not  have immigration attorney now ; and I do  not have attorney for this case . but I went to department of social service family service and told them he might be the father since my ex abuser husband not the father. then they let me filed some forms and sent to him. 

  He is very mad , he thought first fake DNA test will stop me to do the 2nd one. I did not wanted to against him , I thought he will be happy to know he has a baby but he is not. 

   some one replied for me here ealier and said I am very selfish that dont want to let him know he has a baby. that I owe my baby and ex bf a chance to getting to know each other and love each other. 

  I thought that is right , then I tried to share joy from have this baby with ex bf but he is not happy to has this baby and pays child support. 

  Thanks guys. have a wonderful day today. 

At least your baby will get child support, so that's a good thing

[Going through 5,671]

12 hours ago, jacobamanda63 said:

He just dont want to pay child support that is why he is willing give up his parental rights. 

   I said i am okay he give up parental rights but I still need he to pay child support. 

Good thing it's not his choice whether he has to pay child support or not.

[Villanelle 4,122]

On 11/1/2018 at 11:09 PM, jacobamanda63 said:

I am back here again. I have been read each one of replies of you guys . No matter good words or not, Thanks for all of you. 

 I did not told ex boyfriend about this baby , but since I read some replies here then I think I need to letting him knows. 

Unfortunately he said this is not his baby and he said I need to raise this baby with my abuser ex husband. It can not happens because the results already showed he is not the father and no any responsibilities for this baby. 

I did asked ex boyfriend to do paternity test  but he did refused it. I told him that I will make court order to make him does this paternity test if he does not do it.  So he bought a DNA test kit from walmart and did it. of course the result showed he is NOT the father. I really did not had another guy . only my abuser husband and him( just once). 

 I am very up set , I believe he did changed his simple because he asked me stay in the car and he took his simple to his mother . they did body moves and did not letting me see what they did. Then I am going throw the county to ask him to redo paternity test . 

He is very mad and texted me about will get a attorney take this baby away from me. I said , you try.  Then he said will have half custody if his , I said that is good because this baby needs loves from his father. but he said will sign a form and give up the parental rights and will  not pay one cent child support. I said that is fine with me but I do need child support. His sound likes I can do nothing about it if he give up the parental rights . is that true?

  anyway , I am waiting for result . His appointment is on 20th. 

  I totally lost. 

  Does my VAWA case will be denied ? if so , can I bring this baby go with me. I can not live without of this baby. 

  thanks for you all. 

  May God bless you. 

 

Ok forget about the DNA test from Walmart. That was a waste of time and money. You need to go down to your county child support office and ask for help establishing paternity and getting child support. Check their website for intake times and hours open. Go as early as you can as you may have to wait a while. Bring ALL your paperwork from court re- divorce and paternity as well as birth certificates, ID, income info etc. 

The only DNA tests that count are ones done by child support office/courts.

As for support/custody that will be handled by court. It would be great if you guys could come to an agreement but BF seems to not want anything to do with the child which is a shame. Regardless the court will order him to pay child support AND arrange visitation for him- if he doesnt use the visitation then he doesnt see the child.

He CAN NOT give up his rights to the child and not have to pay child support. The only thing he can do is like I already said, pay but not ever participate in visitation. NO COURT is going to allow a father to give up rights like that UNLESS there is another man currently willing, able, and requesting to legally adopt the child. In the US fathers can NOT simply disown the child and get out of child support. Even when there is another man trying to get legal guardianship over the child it is a hard process to terminate fathers rights and obligations.

As for VAWA did you read what sandra wrote? Did you send her a PM previously? You need to notify VSC about this situation before the interview. Have you looked for legal aide? Do you need help finding legal aide or preparing a statement on your own?