K1 beneficiary : Nervous Mom ..PLS HELP

[Knome 245]

2 minutes ago, Diane and Chris said:

I second that. I wonder what OP’s fiancé has to say about all of this?  It could affect him in ways he’s not ready to deal with.

My fiance is a woman ...she is dealing same thing....she has a kid too n she cant leave US v discussed all of this in advance n ultimately i decided to b thr in US instead of her coming here...she told me she is thr wit evry thing ...even if i hav to go thru any court case

[me55592a 8]

According to her own embassy she will need a letter of no objection for the child to leave India from the other parent regardless if she has full custody unless she has a court document stating the daughter can leave the country

[Knome 245]

Out of all these ..i really liked the idea tht someone gave here ...to talk wit my ex husband n his now wife together n let thm understand more and try to convince thm may b tht other woman will understand n convince him even...and other thn that i will follow all the legal process all i understood frm all the views of various other ppl posted here...thnks a lot fr help

[Ash.1101 1,756]

This needs to go through the courts.

And I noticed that you said something along the lines of that your need your life started again and that your ex is already married and restarted his life....

This may be hard to understand (because I have a hard time understanding it) but there are a good number of women who leave their children behind while they immigrate and get settled, both for the safety and welfare of the child. Basically the child stays with the father, while the mother moves, gets married, and establishes a life in the US.

I personally couldn't do it, but plenty of women have.  Some people believe that by letting the kid stay with the other parental figure, it would be less impactful to the child when it comes to immigrating, if they came later in the process, once mom was already settled and everything was good in the US.

[Knome 245]

30 minutes ago, Ash.1101 said:

This needs to go through the courts.

And I noticed that you said something along the lines of that your need your life started again and that your ex is already married and restarted his life....

This may be hard to understand (because I have a hard time understanding it) but there are a good number of women who leave their children behind while they immigrate and get settled, both for the safety and welfare of the child. Basically the child stays with the father, while the mother moves, gets married, and establishes a life in the US.

I personally couldn't do it, but plenty of women have.  Some people believe that by letting the kid stay with the other parental figure, it would be less impactful to the child when it comes to immigrating, if they came later in the process, once mom was already settled and everything was good in the US.

Yeah at first i thought same...but now as date is coming near my heart is feeling heavy..idnt wana leave my daughter behind in any way...i m jus not able to trust tht other woman...n she is a girl child ...i know how much she wud b needing her own mom

[SalishSea 18,125]

2 hours ago, Knome said:

Yeah at first i thought same...but now as date is coming near my heart is feeling heavy..idnt wana leave my daughter behind in any way...i m jus not able to trust tht other woman...n she is a girl child ...i know how much she wud b needing her own mom

Exactly.   I am a divorced mom and my kids are grown and nearly grown, but I can tell you that no one will love your child the way you do.  Hugs and good luck with your choices.  

[FernandLevi 36]

Wouldn't the child miss out on grandparents, aunt's, uncle's, cousins, family friends, cultural experiences and more?

 

You might want to consider migrating to USA without your daughter since that's a voluntary choice. Every daughter deserves her father reguardless what the mother thinks of him. This should have been a thought before having your daughter.

 

[TNJ17 1,329]

You need permission from both legal parents to take a child out of the country. If you try to do it without his permission you’re in for a big fight. Like others have said it could be seen as kidnapping and you’d be in deep trouble if you did it. It doesn’t sound like he’s willing to let that go so you two need to come up with an arrangement because simply taking kid out won’t do. 

[CEE53147 559]

What is more important - the best interests of the child or immigrating to the US.  That is the question. I know what my choice would be.

[Jaqui86 2]

I have two children and my ex husband has signed a statutory declaration regarding the children moving. I made sure stipulations were in place though I had the solicitor write in exactly when we’d be filing that I keep him up to date with each process and also (not for the first year) but every year after that I would bring the children back to the uk for a minimum of two weeks and if for some reason we couldn’t get back we would fly my ex husband over and he could stay with us for two weeks. I know your ex husband doesn’t seem to want them go but any decent father wouldn’t to be fair so you may want something drawn up that shows him you’re not just running away with them. 

[Rocko20 159]

1 hour ago, FernandLevi said:

Wouldn't the child miss out on grandparents, aunt's, uncle's, cousins, family friends, cultural experiences and more?

 

 

 

 

To be fair if that was a significant concern, no mother would ever immigrate to America with their kids 

[Knome 245]

3 minutes ago, Rocko20 said:

 

To be fair if that was a significant concern, no mother would ever immigrate to America with their kids 

Yeah..m already living away frm grand parent ...or any other family member evn while living in india ...thy are in some other state...thy get to see us only once in a year sometimes

[NikLR 13,232]

3 hours ago, FernandLevi said:

Wouldn't the child miss out on grandparents, aunt's, uncle's, cousins, family friends, cultural experiences and more?

 

You might want to consider migrating to USA without your daughter since that's a voluntary choice. Every daughter deserves her father reguardless what the mother thinks of him. This should have been a thought before having your daughter.

 

Dont be silly.  No one thinks about what ifs like this situation before getting pregnant.  

[Going through 5,671]

7 hours ago, Knome said:

Yeah at first i thought same...but now as date is coming near my heart is feeling heavy..idnt wana leave my daughter behind in any way...i m jus not able to trust tht other woman...n she is a girl child ...i know how much she wud b needing her own mom

I feel for you, I really do.  And from his viewpoint, he may be thinking along the same lines---that he doesn't know this person, and he doesn't know if he can trust that person around his child---especially in a country far away from him, with limited physical access, and where he'll barely see her.

 

Your ex husband may also be aware of the fact that getting approved for a tourist visa in his country to come visit his daughter is slim.

 

You said earlier that you're certain you would win a court case for permission to take the child out of the country----so I'm not sure what's stopping you from doing that to solve your problem?

[Mr.Jose 64]

He is the father and as it looks the kid is not going anywhere without him.

 

And I think the father loves his child very much and doesn’t want another man raising his child. 

 

How about the other way around, put yourself in his shoes.

 

You “ YOURSELF” signing papers for the father to keep the child in his country. Could you do it?

Edited July 30, 2018 by Mr.Bob