Fiancee just got Denied

[WokTheDog 17]

13 minutes ago, Going through said:

I'm' curious----what is her basis for this demand, considering she's the cheater?

 

Tell her she can sell the engagement ring if she needs quick cash, since it obviously didn't mean much to her in the first place.

She never makes sense.  its always, "Find a way, That's it".   she says to be able to get a rental condo again, she needs cash.  said she got rid of everything to be here.  I would feel bad if everything was my fault, but she cheated, so she dug her own hole.     She wants me to sell the engagement ring and give her the money.    I also just gave her a $300 gold necklace that she won't let me return. Does anyone think she didn't cheat?  curious

Edited September 12, 2018 by WokTheDog

[Going through 5,671]

Just now, WokTheDog said:

She never makes sense.  its always, "Find a way, That's it".   she says to be able to get a rental condo again, she needs cash.  said she got rid of everything to be here.  I would feel bad if everything was my fault, but she cheated, so she dug her own hole.    Does anyone think she didn't cheat?  curious

Like you said, she dug her own hole.  If she was with another man, she should have thought of the possible consequences if you found out.  Which you did.

Now she has to lay in the bed she made.

 

Personally, I wouldn't give her a dime and just tell her she can ask her new boyfriend for help.

[WokTheDog 17]

3 minutes ago, Going through said:

Like you said, she dug her own hole.  If she was with another man, she should have thought of the possible consequences if you found out.  Which you did.

Now she has to lay in the bed she made.

 

Personally, I wouldn't give her a dime and just tell her she can ask her new boyfriend for help.

I already did that and she said she isn't interested in him and didn't have sex with him.  hahaha.    yeah, what can i do if she doesn't want to leave without her $4000?  

[E & J 2018 132]

16 minutes ago, NuestraUnion said:

Careful, the next step if she does not get anything out of this could be a VAWA claim. Going back home with no immediate prospect of immigrating to the US, shamed, and with no money could make her resort to drastic measures.

If he never married her, within the 90 days, she will have to go home, period?  Can she sill claim VAWA?

[WokTheDog 17]

10 hours ago, E & J 2018 said:

Have an eye witness with you when you open this discussion. Take the ring and then offer to pay for her flight home. I would book the next available flight and be done with this relationship. Block her from all means of contact. You will never be able to trust her, again...… That's just my opinion.

I am so done with this fake relationship.   I just need to get her out of my house and back home.   I don't want to pay her because she broke our engagement contract of sleeping with this guy.  I removed all my valuable assets from the house before I left for work.

[Boiler 45,575]

Let the Boyfriend pay.

[WokTheDog 17]

13 hours ago, CEE53147 said:

Do not continue to live with her to avoid being accused of DV so she can use VAWA.  Close any accounts you added her to to avoid financial ruin.  Be proactive to protect yourself legally and financially.

Yeah, I think that might be a really good idea.   She is not on any of my accounts.   

[Unlockable 7,314]

17 minutes ago, E & J 2018 said:

If he never married her, within the 90 days, she will have to go home, period?  Can she sill claim VAWA?

Great point.

 

Now that I think about I don't think she would qualify for VAWA since the OP and her did not marry. 

 

Still, there could be claims of abuse and her using that as a means to stay in the US.

[Pbchief2 82]

3 hours ago, WokTheDog said:

 

anyway, I am 100% sure she was cheating on me based on these facts and other things i came up with.   I removed my valuables from my house, just as a precaution, since i no longer trust her.  I now need to get a plan to remove her from my house and send her home.   last night i asked her what she wants to do and she said go back home, so as I was booking her flight, she then tells me she will need money to re-establish herself in her condo.  I didn't ask how much, but knowing her, I am assuming 5,000usd+.    I'm not going to pay her that, but I will pay for her ticket home.    I am mad at myself.  I saw all these signs a year ago and went forward anyway.   lesson learned.

Sorry if it opening a wound, but what other signs did you see? I've heard the gay thing quite a bit. Just curious what else to look for.

[WokTheDog 17]

33 minutes ago, Pbchief2 said:

Sorry if it opening a wound, but what other signs did you see? I've heard the gay thing quite a bit. Just curious what else to look for.

she would ask me for money when i didn't have it.  Would always say, "Make it happen".    her stories about certain things would always change, because we all know if you lie, the story will change.  If you tell the truth, the story is always the same.  I would call her on the weekends while we were chatting on Whatsapp.   Moments after texting back and forth and she wouldn't answer the phone after two calls.  on the third she would answer, always looking dumbfounded not knowing what to say.   The guy lives in the complex so it is very easy for him to go back and forth from his place.   This happened many times and one time particular I called and said I wanted to see her little girl again, because I bought her a toy.    after telling me she wasn't there, I get her on camera and she said the 5yr old was at the pool by herself.   You can start seeing a pattern.   she would have pictures by herself at really nice restaurants and I knew her child was with her sister.  I always wondered who was taking the picture.  On one I saw a reflection in the window, it was a guy.   Oh well, its over.  I am glad its done.  Just have to get her on a plane now.

[Boiler 45,575]

Sounds like with the benefit of hindsight there were plenty of warnings.

[Laser1 63]

2 hours ago, WokTheDog said:

I already did that and she said she isn't interested in him and didn't have sex with him.  hahaha.    yeah, what can i do if she doesn't want to leave without her $4000?  

You can serve her an eviction notice, to terminate residency according to your local laws.

[Shiran 1,134]

3 hours ago, WokTheDog said:

she would ask me for money when i didn't have it.  Would always say, "Make it happen".    her stories about certain things would always change, because we all know if you lie, the story will change.  If you tell the truth, the story is always the same.  I would call her on the weekends while we were chatting on Whatsapp.   Moments after texting back and forth and she wouldn't answer the phone after two calls.  on the third she would answer, always looking dumbfounded not knowing what to say.   The guy lives in the complex so it is very easy for him to go back and forth from his place.   This happened many times and one time particular I called and said I wanted to see her little girl again, because I bought her a toy.    after telling me she wasn't there, I get her on camera and she said the 5yr old was at the pool by herself.   You can start seeing a pattern.   she would have pictures by herself at really nice restaurants and I knew her child was with her sister.  I always wondered who was taking the picture.  On one I saw a reflection in the window, it was a guy.   Oh well, its over.  I am glad its done.  Just have to get her on a plane now.

Regardless if the actually cheated, or not, based on your side of the story she appears to be a dodgy and dishonest person. Relationships are precious and fragile, the LTRs are triply so. This person used you and lied to you. There is no walking back from that. I feel bad for you, and for her child who apparently is being trained and taught to lie from the early age. This is a very sad story. 

[WokTheDog 17]

1 hour ago, Shiran said:

Regardless if the actually cheated, or not, based on your side of the story she appears to be a dodgy and dishonest person. Relationships are precious and fragile, the LTRs are triply so. This person used you and lied to you. There is no walking back from that. I feel bad for you, and for her child who apparently is being trained and taught to lie from the early age. This is a very sad story. 

Yes very sad.   She got very violent.  Ripped my shirt and threw a bunch of stuff at me.  Cracked my armoire and threw a heavy candle at my knee.    I can't take anymore of this.

[CEE53147 559]

Get out of the house IMMEDIATELY.