90 Day Fiance -- season ??? [merged threads]

[debbiedoo 2,339]

Just now, Cyberfx1024 said:

Yeah the visa FB I am on is getting that way. It is supposed to be for everyone but mainly Filipinas are on it and the misinformation is rampant.

i was on some ... 90 day uncensored group something like that- big group and active but i just couldnt deal with how downright mean and judgmental so many of them were (especially over looks- and i looked at these peoples profiles - those who live in glass houses shouldnt throw stones and all....)

[Cyberfx1024 7,980]

8 minutes ago, debbiedoo said:

i was on some ... 90 day uncensored group something like that- big group and active but i just couldnt deal with how downright mean and judgmental so many of them were (especially over looks- and i looked at these peoples profiles - those who live in glass houses shouldnt throw stones and all....)

So you know if it was on Reddit? If it was then I know the group you are talking about and you are right.

[SalishSea 17,500]

1 hour ago, Cyberfx1024 said:

It's the same way for the UAE as well. It's the one place where I have been in a airport and had BP openly look at me then decide to get the guy beside me for a "random search".

Because you're American.....?

[Mary Lou 681]

2 hours ago, lonesurvivor said:

Apparently Jay is in ICE custody after violating a protection order against Ashley. He is in a prison in new york. 

😳😳

[Cyberfx1024 7,980]

49 minutes ago, Jorgedig said:

Because you're American.....?

Yep, they often refuse to go after Europeans or GCC people because we cause them to much grief.

Just like in Qatar where couples and single men can't go to the malls on Friday because it's "family day". But the Indian police and security guards won't stop Europeans or GCC personnel. When I first met my wife in Doha I went to take her on a date to the mall on our day off (Friday) and she freaked out, thinking we were going to get in trouble because "it's family day, we can't go there". We ended up having no issues.

[Falcon Cara 378]

18 hours ago, lonesurvivor said:

Apparently Jay is in ICE custody after violating a protection order against Ashley. He is in a prison in new york. 

I just read that on some website as well, I am kinda surprised

[JFH 12,189]

1 hour ago, Falcon Cara said:

I just read that on some website as well, I am kinda surprised

I’ve seen his mugshot on the ICE website. Interesting that his new face tattoo has disappeared. Apparently he turned himself in when he heard there was a warrant for his arrest because of his breach of the PFA order and when he turned himself in then found he was out of status with a NTA for August so ICE picked him up. 

 

I didn't like him at all but I feel Ashley is equally responsible here. In the recent episode where she called 911 (although no one’s life was in danger) he was already out of the house. He was leaving. When he stood up to go see lunged at him. She put her hands on him first. When the cops came and spoke to him in the living room she was upstairs but when the cops finished speaking to him she came downstairs. Why? To taunt him? Absolutely no need to come downstairs. Should have stayed upstairs till he left. 

 

It’s terrible that he was unfaithful to her. Unforgivable behavior. But as a result he will now be deported and will likely never be able to even visit the US for many, many years at least. It seems harsh - yes, he cheated on her but 50% of marriages fall apart. It’s not the worst thing someone can do here. And it’s not worthy of deportation. He didn’t murder anyone. She has orchestrated altercations to give her a reason so that she can call the police. She yells like a banshee hoping to get a reaction from him so that she can justify calling the cops to report abuse. She pushes, pushes and pushes some more till she gets what she wants. She has been very cruel. Constantly holding the “I will get you deported” knife to him. That’s all she’s bothered about. She feels that’s a victory. What a sad excuse for an individual that your greatest “moment” is setting up a situation to get your husband deported. Congratulations. 

[Falcon Cara 378]

43 minutes ago, JFH said:

I didn't like him at all but I feel Ashley is equally responsible here. In the recent episode where she called 911 (although no one’s life was in danger) he was already out of the house. He was leaving. When he stood up to go see lunged at him. She put her hands on him first. When the cops came and spoke to him in the living room she was upstairs but when the cops finished speaking to him she came downstairs. Why? To taunt him? Absolutely no need to come downstairs. Should have stayed upstairs till he left. 

 

 

It was no need to call the cops, she did it out of pure spite, he was already outside.  I felt sorry for him when that happened

[JFH 12,189]

8 minutes ago, Falcon Cara said:

It was no need to call the cops, she did it out of pure spite, he was already outside.  I felt sorry for him when that happened

Yes, pure spite. As if the cops have nothing better to do. I hope no one in real danger in their city that night had to wait longer for help to come because they were attending to the result of Ashley’s poor decisions. 

 

If he wanted to fight this, and I don’t think he does - he turned himself in so I think he has reached acceptance that he will have to leave the country - he probably has a case for economic abuse. By not filing for his AOS she forced him into a situation where he could not legally earn money and had to be dependent on her for everything. Every mouthful of food, every drop of water, every mile traveled by car, every stitch of clothing, it all had to be financed by her. I have seen threads here where immigrants whose spouses did not file for them and forced them into a life of being an illegal immigrant and financial dependence were able to claim that as a form of abuse. 

Edited July 4, 2019 by JFH

[debbiedoo 2,339]

i mean, if paul had cheated on me 3 days after we got married i wouldnt have filed Aos either. 

 

i would have filed for an annulment though. real quick. 

[JFH 12,189]

4 hours ago, debbiedoo said:

i mean, if paul had cheated on me 3 days after we got married i wouldnt have filed Aos either. 

 

i would have filed for an annulment though. real quick. 

But would you have even married a 19-year-old with a reputation for sleeping around? 

 

My husband and I have a little game when we watch the show and have a bet how many times Ashley says “Jay cheated on me” each episode. She was even told by her friends before he arrived here that he had been cheating. 

[debbiedoo 2,339]

7 minutes ago, JFH said:

But would you have even married a 19-year-old with a reputation for sleeping around? 

 

My husband and I have a little game when we watch the show and have a bet how many times Ashley says “Jay cheated on me” each episode. She was even told by her friends before he arrived here that he had been cheating. 

well, no. i like men, not children. i have a 13 year old boy. dont need another kid LOL

 

she was in such denial, it was crazy. i also notice we havent seen the friend since all this either. ashley could at least tuck her tail between her legs and apologize and say ' you were right, sorry i was a witch' 

[lonesurvivor 48]

14 hours ago, JFH said:

I’ve seen his mugshot on the ICE website. Interesting that his new face tattoo has disappeared. Apparently he turned himself in when he heard there was a warrant for his arrest because of his breach of the PFA order and when he turned himself in then found he was out of status with a NTA for August so ICE picked him up. 

 

I didn't like him at all but I feel Ashley is equally responsible here. In the recent episode where she called 911 (although no one’s life was in danger) he was already out of the house. He was leaving. When he stood up to go see lunged at him. She put her hands on him first. When the cops came and spoke to him in the living room she was upstairs but when the cops finished speaking to him she came downstairs. Why? To taunt him? Absolutely no need to come downstairs. Should have stayed upstairs till he left. 

 

It’s terrible that he was unfaithful to her. Unforgivable behavior. But as a result he will now be deported and will likely never be able to even visit the US for many, many years at least. It seems harsh - yes, he cheated on her but 50% of marriages fall apart. It’s not the worst thing someone can do here. And it’s not worthy of deportation. He didn’t murder anyone. She has orchestrated altercations to give her a reason so that she can call the police. She yells like a banshee hoping to get a reaction from him so that she can justify calling the cops to report abuse. She pushes, pushes and pushes some more till she gets what she wants. She has been very cruel. Constantly holding the “I will get you deported” knife to him. That’s all she’s bothered about. She feels that’s a victory. What a sad excuse for an individual that your greatest “moment” is setting up a situation to get your husband deported. Congratulations. 

Yeah, she is not innocent AT ALL. And these Americans who use their immigration status over their head constantly are horrible people...

 

You dont want to live with my mom? Okay, well maybe you'll get deported. Well you cheat on me? I'll make you get deported and never file your greencard paper work. Its like they purchase an immigrant spouse and didn't like it so they wanted to return it as a package from amazon, not a real person.

[Paul & Mallory 1,398]

On ‎6‎/‎30‎/‎2019 at 12:53 PM, JFH said:

Want to know what happens with you spend “$10k” on an immigration lawyer? You end up sending the I-130 in a plastic binder with a big heart picture on the front. Exactly what USCIS DOESN'T want to receive. Hey! Rachel! Reading the filing instructions is FREE! No Gofundme required!  

OMG I just choked on my coffee.  What a couple of idiots. They're perfect for one another.

 

 

In other opinions..

 

I was never a fan of Jay. I was also never a fan of Ashley. She is all about attention. I am NOT advocating for infidelity here... that's an intolerable deal breaker for me. However, holding someone's immigration status over their head and using "I'LL DEPORT YOU" as a means of threatening the person is absolutely equally intolerable. If your marriage fell apart, fine. Don't stay married to him. Don't even let him come back to your house. That's all well and good. But you BOTH Entered the marriage EQUALLY WILLINGLY. So running around calling the cops and screaming HE'S AN ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT, COME GET HIM is outrageous to me. She basically forced him into the corner he's in, by refusing to file his AOS papers, but also not leaving him. She just left him on a string. You know... AGAIN, not commending Jay for his actions... but his "who's fault is it" comment really had me curious. I REALLY want to know what that stemmed from. I told Paul from the get go, when this story started getting dramatic with them, I felt like there was more to it that we aren't seeing on TV. I do not believe for a second she is any less guilty than he is, for some reason.

 

She definitely lunged at him without warrant when he got up to leave. Her and her friend acting like he "put his hands on her" - he was trying to keep her off of him. I never saw him do anything physically unacceptable in that scene. He came in, sat down, and never came at her. She definitely came for him. And when he was trying to leave, both those girls turned it into something it definitely wasn't. She just wants to be some huge victim, for some reason. "Oh my husband tricked me and is illegal and came into my house and put his hands on me, 911 please help". That's all that scene looked like to me.

 

I also saw online that SHE'S been arrested, or something, for throwing a fire extinguisher into his (or someone's) car, or something like that. Case in point.

 

 

The dude who went to Ecuador. I mean... I'm not totally surprised at what a doormat he is, we all recall his toddler breakdown at having to get a itty bitty vaccine. But she's a real piece of work. I ALMOST understand where she's coming from, with wanting him to "prove himself". He comes off as incredibly dependent, and she wants to know that he can make it living out there. She seems like a no nonsense kind of gal, so probably isn't the sort to put up with someone with any sort of dependency issues. She doesn't want to be taking care of him, like his mama. I kind of get that. I never liked dating guys who couldn't take care of themselves. I broke up with a grown man once because he had no idea how to use a washing machine. His mother still came to his place and did his laundry for him. I took that sign, and made my exit off that highway to early parenthood. Anyway.. she just REALLY missed the mark with that point she was trying to make. He MOVED here for you. To a foreign country. Gave up everything. He has everything he owns with him, MULTIPLE suitcases. In a new country that, according to BOTH of them, is not the safest place to be. SHOW UP AT THE DANG AIRPORT. All of that other stuff aside - not showing up when your partner gets to town, PERMANENTLY, just really illustrates your lack of enthusiasm about them being there. I was at the airport an hour early when Paul came home for good. I wanted a good parking spot. A front row seat at the baggage claim. I did NOT want to be late. I wanted to be standing right there when he walked out. That's such a huge milestone for LDR couples. It just blew my mind how much she didn't care. And had the nerve to say things like "You're a big boy, figure it out" when he was clearly disappointed by it. I get it, he is a grown man. But he's also YOUR man. Which, of course, based off her new comments they aired when she was with her friends... I'm now trying to figure out how they even got here to begin with. She couldn't care less about him or being with him indefinitely, let alone marrying him. We watched that last episode and my husband just said, "If I did not know for sure you and I were going to get married, I never would have ended my life in Sweden to come here." And I would not have done it, myself.

[Mary Lou 681]

20 hours ago, JFH said:

But would you have even married a 19-year-old with a reputation for sleeping around? 

 

My husband and I have a little game when we watch the show and have a bet how many times Ashley says “Jay cheated on me” each episode. She was even told by her friends before he arrived here that he had been cheating. 

She also told the friend that had the scooter, if Jesus came down and told me Jay cheated i'd still marry him. Sick of her making herself out to be the victim.